Series Preview: Houston Astros @ Minnesota Twins June 6-8, 2014 Target Field

contributed by Mr. Happy

This isn’t our hated rivals, the disgusting Seafarers, but I really want to win this series because one of my colleagues here at work is a huge Twins fan, who has had the audacity to express pity on me as an Astros fan. Cur!!! Plus, I went to a conference in Minneapolis last year. That town is boring. There’s no “I Left My Heart in Minneapolis” or anything like that. New Orleans, which is where the previous year’s conference had been held, it’s not.

As I write this preview, the Astros are starting a very overworked TBD in all of the Twins games. However, I have it on some authority (subnuclear no less) that the Astros will be trotting out Dallas Keuchel on Friday, Scott Feldman on Saturday and Colin McHugh on Sunday, to match the Twinkies’ Phil Hughes on Friday, Kyle Gibson on Saturday and Samuel Deduno on Sunday. Therefore, I’ll prepare you for those pitchers, but I might have to amend it if Bo Porter changes up the rotation.

June 6, 2014 7:10 CDT

Dallas Keuchel (6-3 2.70) v. Phil Hughes (6-1 3.12)

It appears that Phil Hughes may have finally figured it out, probably being out of the spotlights of the Yankme Stadium fishbowl did him wonders. However, he doesn’t have much history against current Astros. In fact, only Chris Carter has any at-bats against him, and Carter only has three, garnering one hit. The Twins also have limited history against Keuchel, but the ten at-bats that they have yielded six hits. Jason Kubel leads the way, going 2-3 with two dongs against Keuchel, so Keuchel will have to be very wary of Kubel.

This one is going to be tough to call, as it pits each club’s ace against the other. On the one hand, Keuchel is a perfect 5-0 1.64 on the road this season. Interestingly, Keuchel’s ERA is over two runs higher at home at 3.76, to go with his 1-3 home record. Hughes actually is much better on the road too, notching a 4-0 2.45, as opposed to 2-1 3.72 at home. Keuchel is coming off of a loss, one in which his command temporarily deserted him, walking in a couple of runs. At some point, Keuchel’s got to lay an egg on the road, and I fear that this one might be it.

June 7, 2014 1:10 CDT

Scott Feldman (3-3 4.25) v. Kyle Gibson (4-5 4.35)

Kyle Gibson started out the season like a house of fire, but he’s really cooled off in his last few outings, allowing 16 earnies in his last 26 innings of work. Again, Gibson has much better at home (3-1 1.85) than on the road (1-4 7.39), so that doesn’t portend well for the Good Guys. The Astros don’t have a lot of history (14 at-bats) against Gibson, but what they’ve seen, they’ve liked, chalking up six hits, including two doubles. Robbie Grossman leads the way with a perfect 2-2.

The Twins have 62 at-bats against Feldman, hitting .258 with 16 knocks against the tall righthander, with two taters. Not unexpectedly, Joe Mauer leads the charge, going 6-18 with a big fly and five RBIs against Feldman. Pesky Jason Kubel has the other home run, but he’s only 2-11 against Feldman. The Twins have more RBIs than strikeouts against Feldman, which concerns me a bit. Feldman has also been better on the road (1-1 3.74) than at home (2-2 5.40), so we’ve got that going for us.

This one also is tough to call too.

June 8, 2014 1:10 CDT

Collin McHugh (4.3 2.52) v. Samuel Deduno (2-3 3.83)

Deduno is 1-0 4.02 at home, and he’s 1-3 3.62 on the road, so he’s been pretty consistent this season. The Astros haven’t had much success in only 15 at-bats against Deduno, as Jason Castro and Matt Dominguez have the only base knocks, both singles. Deduno has struck out five Astros, versus two free passes.

McHugh, on the other hand, has been much better on the road (2-1 1.33) than at home (2-2 3.91), so might see a continuation of that trend, or, we’ll see him revert to the mean. Only one current Twin has any at-bats against McHugh, and that’s Kurt Suzuki, who’s 1-2 with a long ball, so we’re facing a real unknown.

Prediction

The Astros will take one out of three, but I’ll be damned if I know which game we’ll win.

Promotions

June 6, 2014-Fireworks Friday, a split-the-pot raffle and the first 10,000 fans get the All-Star Game Snoopy figurine that is exclusive to Target Field this season in honor of Minnesota hosting the All-Star Game this season

June 7, 2014-DQ Sensational Saturdays, split-the-pot raffle and the first 10,000 lucky fans get the Gardy Gnome (whatever the fuck that is)

June 8, 2014-Split-the-pot raffle, the first 5,000 fans age 14 and under will receive the all-star game bat and it’s Crystal Farms Kids Day

Injuries

Minnesota-Sam Fuld is on the 15-day DL, and Mike Pelfrey is on the 15-day DL. Fuld is suffering from concussion-like symptoms and may be back sometime in June, and Pelfrey has nerve irritation in his right elbow (plus he was stinking it up at 0-3 7.99).

Houston-the Astros have five pitchers on the disabled list at present: Matt Albers (15-day DL with right shoulder tendinitis; could be back possibly in June); Anthony Bass (15-day DL with right intercostal strain; could be back in early June); Jose Cisnero (out for season with May 2014 Tommy John surgery); Jesse Crain (recovering from October 2013 biceps surgery; he could be back in June as he is throwing bully session in Houston); and Asher Wojciechowski (15-day DL battling both a right lat strain and a flexor muscle strain; he’s been sent to EST after suffering a recent setback, putting his return date as TBD).

submitted by austro

Time To Go Bird Hunting

Baltimore Orioles (26-24) @ Houston Astros (22-32)

The Astros are returning from a very encouraging 6-4 road trip, and riding a 5-game winning streak! I don’t know when they last had a streak that long (especially on the road), but I suspect it’s been a while.

I’ve just returned from a road trip of my own to the western slope of Colorado. Grand Junction, where I lived until I was in junior high, hosts the Junior College World Series every year (and they’ve been hosting it since the 50’s, I think). I don’t go out there every year, but I go when I can to take in a really great celebration of baseball. The community really supports the tournament, and it’s a big deal both to the locals and to the teams that win their regional tournaments to qualify to compete for the national championship. This year was especially meaningful on a personal level, as a close family friend – who is now in his 80s and was an instrumental part of the tournament during the 60s and 70s – made the trip over from Denver for the Friday night banquet and the Saturday opening. Tony LaRussa was the speaker for the banquet, and even though he’s still a derp, he had some amusing stories to tell. His man-crush on Pujols hasn’t dissipated at all.

The late, great mihoba also hailed from Grand Junction, although he was a bit younger than me and I don’t think we ever met as kids. I like to think that we may have bumped into one another at the tournament, chasing foul balls and just generally goofing around.

Thursday, May 29, 7:10 CDT

Jimenez (2-6, 4.98) vs Peacock (1-4, 5.20)

Four or five years ago Ubaldo Jimenez was pitching for the Rockies and striking out everybody he faced. Now he has trouble getting anybody out. Go figure. Most of the Astros are young enough that nobody has much of a history: as a team they’re 9-for-31 in 34 PAs. Altuve and Krauss have two hits apiece, and nobody else has more than one.

From all appearances, Peacock is pitching to retain his spot in the starting rotation. Exactly one active (and I use the term loosely) Oriole has faced Peacock: David Lough is 1-for-2 (with a single) against Peacock.

NJCAA Tournament, Day 1, Saturday, May 24

The first day of the tournament is always great. There are four games scheduled for the day, everybody is psyched, and the energy level is high. The weather was great (50s in the morning, high in the 70s, typical 15-20% humidity), and everybody was ready to go.

Iowa Western and Columbia State (TN) kicked things off at 9am on Saturday, and it was one of those games in which one of the teams (Columbia) seems comfortably in control, and then everything gets turned upside down. Columbia went out to an early 5-0 lead, and Iowa Western didn’t seem like much of a threat. But in the middle of the game they chipped away, and when they came to the 9^th they were only down by one. They wound up scoring two in the top of the 9^th to take the lead, but Columbia loaded the bases with one out in the bottom of the 9^th, and extra innings seemed likely, if not an outright win for Columbia. Then the Columbia batter absolutely smoked a ball up the middle, but the pitcher made an improbable snag of the liner and doubled off the runner on first. And just like that, the game was over. Everybody was stunned.

The second game at noon featured Midland College (TX) against Johnson County (KS). Midland came out crushing the ball, and it seemed like every batter was a carbon copy of the preceding one: wide base, fast bat, level through zone, and lots of contact. They wound up hitting several homers, and although Johnson County eventually scored some runs, the game was never really in doubt, with Midland winning 10-5.

The third game of the day was Cochise College (AZ) against Blinn College (TX). I took a break from the sun for this one, so I missed the Blinn starter, Robbie Dickey, who is apparently one of the hot pitching prospects for this year’s draft. He had a so-so outing, going 5.1 innings with 3 ER, 6 BB, and 9 K. Blinn wound up winning 7-4.

The final game of the day kicked off at 7:30pm, featuring Chattahoochee (AL) against Delgado (LA). I think this was the #1-ranked team against the #3-ranked team, but I’m not sure. Whatever the rankings, these two team were very evenly matched, and the game went to the 8^th tied up 4-4.  Delgado scored two in the top of the 8^th to take a 6-4 lead, but in the bottom of the 8^th they gave it back and then some, with Chattahoochee taking an 8-6 lead. Neither team scored in the 9^th, and Chattahoochee moved to the winner’s bracket, and Delgado found themselves in the unenviable loser’s bracket.

Friday, May 30, 7:10 CDT

TBA (0-0, 0.00) vs Oberholtzer (1-6, 5.32)

Here comes TBA again. Seems like we’ve faced this guy a lot this year, and his ERA doesn’t make me feel all fuzzy. But we’re hot, and it seems like a good time to give this guy a shit-stomping.

Oberholtzer may or may not be the anonymous source of the sour grapes about Luhnow’s numbers-driven approach to team assembly. If I were Obie, I’d make damn sure that the numbers were on my side, which means that he’s got a ways to go to straighten things out. In his favor, current Orioles are sporting a .176/.176/.176 line against him in 17 PAs, which is pretty fucking stout. On the other hand, that’s not a lot of plate appearances, and Chris Davis appears to be heating up, so watch out.

NJCAA Tournament, Day 2, Sunday, May 25

Sunday dawned cloudy (and early: Grand Junction is far enough north that the hotel window starts to get light around 5:30am, even when it’s cloudy). There were three games scheduled for Sunday, but the committe’s worst fears materialized when the weather went south in the afternoon.

One of the cruel aspects of the tournament is that two teams will be eliminated by Sunday afternoon (even before two of the ten teams have played their first game). The first elimination game featured the first two losers from Saturday: Columbia against Johnson County. Johnson County scored two in the top of the 2^nd, but Columbia came back and battered them with 9 runs in the bottom of the 2^nd, and after that the outcome wasn’t really in doubt. Columbia wound up winning by 10 after 5 innings (the tournament has a 10/5-8/7 rule to try to limit the effects of blowouts on pitching staffs).

The 2^nd game was also an elimination game, with Cochise playing Delgado. The game started under a drizzle and overcast, and the conditions were not very conducive to good baseball. Cochise got out to a 3-1 lead after 3 innings, and increased it to 7-2 after 6. There was a significant rain delay during the 6^th and we decided to repair to my mother’s home, and when they returned (without us) Cochise dispatched Delgado 9-5.

The Sunday evening game was supposed to feature Spartanburg (SC; being a Marshall Tucker Band fan, they were my sentimental favorite) vs Miami Dade (FL), but the rain was too intense, and the game was postponed until the following day. But that allowed us all to get together at my brother’s and do some cooking and conversing, which was nice.

Saturday, May 31, 3:10 CDT

TBA (0-0, 0.00) vs Keuchel (6-2, 2.55)

Son of a bitch: TBA is such a stud that he can come back with no rest. That gives them a big advantage in pinch hitters, since they don’t have to carry as many pitchers. (For all I know, TBA slugs 4.000, too.) That can’t be good.

To this point in the season, Keuchel is this year’s Astros’ All-Star. I was always impressed by his mental toughness (first witnessed in the CWS for Arkansas), and I’ve hoped that he would be able to make the leap in the bigs. It appears that this is the year that he does so, and I’m delighted. Current Orioles are 7-for-26 against Keuchel, but that’s skewed by ex-Ranger Nelson “Please don’t hit it at me” Cruz, who has a 4-for-9 record against Keuchel. Considering Cruz’s defensive “contributions”, that’s probably about break-even.

NJCAA Tournament, Day 3, Monday, May 26

Monday dawned bright and clear, with a brilliant view of the Colorado National Monument that was breathtaking.

The first game on the schedule was the Spartanburg-Miami game that had been postponed from the previous evening. Ordinarily, Monday would be a three-game day, but because of the rainout, they had to squeeze four games in. This game started at 9am, and Miami ran out to a 3-0 lead and was never really threatened, winning 8-3.

The second game was another loser’s bracket game, Cochise vs Columbia State. This was one of the most exciting games of the tournament so far. Columbia jumped out to a big lead, leading 7-2 after 5, and from there it was a dogfight. Columbia was ahead 8-7 after 6, Cochise went ahead 11-9 in the top of the 9^th, and Columbia tied it with 2 in the bottom of the 9^th. Nobody scored in the 10^th, and then a Columbia player fulfilled every kid’s ultimate dream, hitting a pinch-hit, walk-off homer to deep left-center to win the game in the bottom of the 11^th, eliminating Cochise.

The third game of the day was Blinn against Chattahoochee. The game was even at 2-2 through 5, but then Blinn pulled away with 2 in the 6^th and 6 (!) in the top of the 9^th to win 10-2 to eliminate Chatahoochee.

The final Saturday game featured two unbeaten teams: Midland vs Iowa Western. Based on what I had seem from their earlier games, I expected Midland to spank Iowa. However, Midland apparently never received their wake-up call, and Iowa Western beat the crap out of them 9-0. (I have to admit that I didn’t attend the game, since it was the traditional Memorial Day game that features fireworks after the game, and there are a million people trying to attend; I find it much more relaxing simply to listen to that game on the radio.)

Sunday, June 1, 1:10 CDT

TBA (0-0, 0.00) vs Feldman (3-2, 3.02)

You’re fucking kidding me: TBA three days in a row? Might as well write this one off now. How can we compete with somebody that can throw three games in a row?

Well, there’s no “small sample size” issue here. Current Orioles are .278/.293/.456 against Feldman in 90 ABs. That’s not a particularly bad line, but when you combine it with TBA’s 0.00 ERA, I’m not optimistic about this contest. Somehow TBA is still winless even though he hasn’t given up any earned runs. Sometimes baseball is a funny game.

NJCAA Tournament, Day 4, Tuesday, May 27

The first game of the day was Chatahoochee against Spartanburg, another elimination game. This was perhaps the most bizarre game of the tournament. It started out normally: Chatahoochee scored 2 runs in the top of the 1^st, but in the bottom of the 2^nd Spartanburg scored 9 unearned runs after the Chatahoochee CF dropped a routine fly ball with 2 outs. Things only got worse after that, and Sparteanburg wound up winning 18-3 (after 5 innnings because of the mercy rule).

In the second game of the day, Midland got out to an early lead against Columbia and held on to win 10-7. Midland remains as an interesting team, but they seem to lack a killer instinct.

The third game of the day featured undefeated Blinn against undefeated Miami. Miami totally outclassed Blinn 11-2, sending Blinn to an elimination game against Spartanburg on Wednesday. The highlight of the game was the Bull Durham-esque “we’ve got a natural disaster” delay that occurred when the infield sprinklers all came on at exactly 8:30.

That ended my baseball marathon, since I had to return to Austin on Wednesday. But Spartanburg eliminated Blinn 10-2 Wednesday afternoon, and Iowa Western mauled Miami Dade 10-0 in a game that ended after 5 innings. That leaves Iowa Western as the only undefeated team in the tournament, and with a pretty well-rested pitching staff to boot. Four teams are still standing: Spartanburg will play Miami Dade in an elimination game Thursday afternoon, and Iowa Western and Midland will face off again Thursday evening, and the two winners will play Friday evening. If Iowa Western wins Thursday, that Friday game will be for the championship; if not, two of the three remaining teams will play Friday, and the winner will advance to the championship game against the third team on Saturday evening. (I believe that the bye in that case goes to the team that has played the most games, but if they have all played the same number of games at that point, it comes down to a coin flip.) I have to think that Iowa Western is the favorite, but I wouldn’t be surprised to see Midland or Miami Dade take them down.

Injuries

Probably a bunch, but I’m too lazy to look them up.

Miscellaneous

If you are interested in the JUCO tournament, I encourage you to check out the jucogj.org site. The games are all being streamed live, and there are some good ball players there. And if you fnd yourself looking for something to do in late May some day, I encourage you to consider visiting Grand Junction and taking in the tournament; it’s really quite an undertaking, and a lot of fun to participate in. And even if you miss the tournament, consider Grand Junction as a vacation destination: the Grand Mesa and the Colorado National Monument are really spectacular.

submitted by the GreatBagwellsBeard

At some point during the Opening Day festivities, another poster asked for the origin of my screen name. I demurred at the time because this is a story silly enough to merit everyone’s laughter, rather than just the polite chuckle of a single person.

I signed up for this site in 2007, more than half a decade and two careers ago. I was the sports editor at the dearly departed Houstonist.com back then, and needed some more in depth analysis of the team that wasn’t purely sabermetric (like Crawfish Boxes) or full of redneck bullshit (like the Chron), so that I could steal paraphrase back on Houstonist. OWA looked like the perfect place.

The “select screen name” screen at any site is a pain in the ass. If it’s for something related to personal finances or e-commerce, I suspect that most people tend to gravitate toward something very basic, and very close to your real name. Firstname.Lastname and all that. But if it’s a forum or comments section or whatever, you get to be “creative”. Your name represents how you want to be perceived. Do you want the veil of anonymity or do you want to create a character, a persona to hide behind?

Since 2007, I’ve become a stronger proponent of using my real name online because 1) a future employer who googles my name will mostly get the actor from Airplane and 2) I think it’s largely a chickenshit move to hide behind a screen name, particularly if you’re going to be critical of another person. But in 2007, I was a different person who valued perceived cleverness over honesty, so I watched the cursor blink in the registration screen and tried to come up with something good.

If you’ll forgive another digression, I think we can all agree that quotable movies have a life cycle, with regard to quotability. Austin Powers quotes, circa 1997, were pretty funny. Austin Powers quotes, circa 2003, were the sole domain of morning drive time radio dipshits and cool dads. But now, almost 15 years after the fact, a well-timed Austin Powers quote can actually be funny again, since it’s tinged with a pleasant nostalgia, and the over-use has petered out. And so it goes with the big comedies since then: Anchorman, Borat and the like. I think “niiiiiiice!” will be funny again in 2020.

Though there isn’t a timer that regulates how long you have to decide on a screen name, I was starting to feel the pressure. It’s 2007. Anchorman hasn’t quite worn out its welcome, right? All those Burgundian exclamations. Astros. Hmm.

…

Great Bagwell’s Beard!

So that’s how that happened.

Probable Pitchers

Friday, May 23rd
9:10 CT, Safeco Field
Rudy Owens (0-0, 0.00) v. Felix Hernandez (5-1, 2.94)

This was going to be Brad Peacock, but thankfully it ain’t. Rudy Owens sounds like a brand of breakfast sausage, not a lefty starter. He’s been 2-3 with a 6.05 ERA at OKC, and averages almost 7 K’s per nine. Ironic that he’s called up the day the guy he was traded for got DFA’d.
The ‘stros have handed Felix his only loss on the year, so there’s that. Altuve is hitting .417/.462/1.045 lifetime against him, and Dominguez has homered off him and sports a hilarious 2.100 OPS against one of the best pitchers in baseball.

Saturday, May 24th
9:10 CT, Safeco Field
Dallas Keuchel (5-2, 2.92) v. Brandon Maurer (1-2, 6.00)

Keuchel has been a great surprise this year. At this rate, he might end up as our All Star. Only Stefan Romero, Michael Saunders and Willie Bloomquist are hitting over .300 against him, and Romero is a soccer player. The whole team is .218/.290/.599 against him. So basically they hit like Astros.
Maurer has given up homers to Presley and Villar, and Dominguez has hit him well, too. His name makes him sound like Minnesota’s catcher with a speech impediment.

Sunday, May 25th
3:10 CT, Safeco Field
Scott Feldman (2-2, 3.02) v. Hisashi Iwakuma (3-0, 1.76)

Feldman hasn’t quite been an ace, but he’s been the #3 starter he’d be on any other team. Smoak has hit him well, with a couple dingers. If only we’d drafted him instead of that All Star catcher.
Iwakuma started the season hurt, but has come on strong since returning from the DL. He’s struck out Carter a lot, but then again, who hasn’t? Marwin is crushing him, to the tune of .714/1.286/2.000. Really.

Promotions
C’mon, only OSF has a snowball’s chance of making any of these games.

What to Watch For
– Bouncing back from the sweep.
– Facing two of the best starters in the AL West.
– Scratch #1 up there.
– Fuck the scurvy knaves right in their bilge pump.

Talk about it in the Game Zone!

“It’s a pretty good team,”

Said young Gerald McGreen,

“And the fellow who runs it

Must like it, it seems.

But if I ran the team,”

Said young Gerald McGreen,

“I’d make a few changes.  I’d change the whole scheme.”

“The batters and pitchers and that kind of stuff

They have up here now are not quite good enough.

You see things like these on any old squad.

They’re awfully old­fashioned. I want to be awed!”

“So I’d empty the bench, I’ll fire the ‘pen,

Let the pretenders go and start over again.

And somehow or other I think I could find

Some bats and some balls of a more unusual kind.”

“A four-seamed fastball can be easy to hit,

The guys on my team will throw eight to the mitt.

Four seams over top and four more down below.

Then people will stare, and say, ‘Look at it go!’

My New Team, McGreen’s Team, will make people talk.

My new team, McGreen’s team, will make people gawk.”

“They’ll be so surprised they’ll mumble and groan,

They’ll ask when they see the strange pitches get thrown,

‘Did he make that pitch up or was he just shown?’”

“If you want to win games you don’t normally do,

You have to try pitches, and more than a few

You have to try swings no others can think of

You have to think inside and outside the glove

I’ll pitch ‘em with one hand, I’ll pitch ‘em with two,

I’ll hit ‘em with arms and legs and elbows, too.”

“I’ll call up five catchers and play only one,

Make the other four chase raindrops in the sun

I’ll string up acronyms like BABIP and xRUN

Put ‘em on the scoreboard to show ‘em we won.”

“And then I’ll let go of the manager, too.

Get rid of the gum and pine tar and chew.

Then people will say, ‘Now I like that boy heaps.

His New Team, McGreen Team, is growing by leaps.

He pitches them strong, he pitches them weak,

He pitches inside, a whole new technique.

What do you suppose he will pitch them next week?’”

“In the far middle part

In ‘Leigh, Carolina

Lives a mostly-unknown player who’s even much finer.

He throws with his left and he sings like a swan

And on his back I’ll stitch the last name Rodon.

When people see him they will say, ‘Now, by thunder!

This New Team, McGreen Team, is really a wonder!’”

“Stop?  Well, I should.  But not ‘til I cling

The city’s first ever gold World Series Ring.

The world’s finest trophy, owned by no Clark,

That sometimes resides in a city with an Arch.

And boy! When I get it back home to my park,

The whole world will say, ‘Young McGreen’s made his mark.’”

Astros @ Angels Series Preview

STARTERS

Monday, 5/19/2014 – LA Angels of Anaheim Ballpark in Southern California, USA, The World – 9pm

Dallas Keuchel (4-2) vs Garrett Richards (4-0)

Tuesday, 5/20/2014 – Same

Scott Feldman (2-1) vs Tyler Skaggs (3-1)

Wednesday, 5/21/2014 – Same

Redbeard McHugh (2-2) vs Jered Weaver (4-3)

PROMOTIONS CAPTION CONTEST

Tuesday – Albert Pujols Gnome “Given to the first 20,000 fans to lie about their age.”

Wednesday – Albert Pujols “500 HR” Bobblehead “Given to every current- and ex-Astros pitchers.”

INJURIES

Angels

Brasier – Head

Burnett – Shoulders

Calhoun – Knees

De La Rosa – And

Freese – Toes

Hamilton – Knees

Moran – And

Stewart – Toes

Astros

Albers – Right shoulder tendinitis (June)

Bass – Right intercostal strain (late May)

Cisnero – Right elbow discomfort (TJS – 2015)

Crain – Biceps (June)

Villar – Right hand contusion (maybe this series)

White – TJS (May)

Wojciechowski – Right lat strain (TBD)

PREDICTIONS

Bud Selig will attend the bobblehead ceremony, just because.

McHugh will continue his fall to earth.

Astros lose series, 1-2.

Follow the comments in the GameZone!

sumitted by Mr. Happy

May 12-14, 2014

Fire Drill Preview

There’s nothing quite like a last minute notification that you’re up for this series preview.  That’s right. I found out today that I had the series preview for the series that starts tonight.  There’s nothing like a little pressure to get the adrenalin flowing.  Therefore, no songs and no good fuck or drug stories.  This one will be all facts, all of the time!!!  Bud Girl just breathed a sigh of relief!!!

This series pits two teams that haven’t been playing particularly well in the last ten games.  The stRangers are 4-6 and the Good Guys are 3-7 during that stretch and are currently the last place and the penultimate last place teams in the AL West.  I still fucking hate saying AL West.

Game 1

 Colby Lewis (R) v. Brad Peacock (R)

 7:10 p.m. CDT

This one features Rangers righty Colby Lewis, often on the injured list, against righty Bad Brad Peacock.  The fact that Lewis has been on the shelf for so long means that very few of the current Astros have any history with him.  However, Lewis has some history against the Astros in his career, going 4-1 1.72 against the Astros.  Current Astros are hitting .174 against Lewis (4-23).  Altuve (2-7) and Fowler (1-2) have had some success against Lewis in a small sample size.

Peacock, on the other hand, has a little more, although not much more, history against the stRangers, going 0-2 3.07 against them.  Current stRangers are hitting .238 (10-42) against Peacock.  He needs to be wary of Shin Soo Choo and Geovany Soto (each 2-3), Adrian Beltre (1-4 with a home run) and Leonys Martin (2-4).  A few stRangers are ofer against Peacock, including Moreland (0-6) and Andrus (0-7 with five strikeouts).

Game 2

 Matt Harrison (L) v. Dallas Keuchel (L)

 7:10 p.m. CDT

Matt Harrison has had some success as a big leaguer, but he’s 0-2 5.95 against the Astros.  However, current Astros aren’t doing that well against him, hitting .136 against Harrison.  Khris Karter (0-10 with three K’s) is particularly bad against Harrison.  Altuve (2-3) and Fowler (1-1) are the only two Astros who hits off of Harrison.

The Rangers are hitting .247 (18-73) against Keuchel, who is 0-2 4.75 against them.  Rangers who have had success against Keuchel include Alex Rios (3-9) and Leonys Martin (3-10).  Fat Prince Fielder is 0-5 against Keuchel.

Game 3

 Nick Tepesch (R) v. Scott Feldman (R)

 7:10 p.m. CDT

In the series finale, right hander Nick Tepesch faces off against Astros ace Scott Feldman.  The Astros have gone 0-2 against Tepesch, who sports a 4.09 ERA against the Good Guys.  Current Astros are hitting .364 (8-21) against Tepesch, led by Jason Castro (3-6 with a dong) and Jose Altuve (3-6).

Feldman has pitched several times against his former mates, going 1-1 3.26.  Current Rangers are hitting .210 (26-124) against Feldman.  Mitch Moreland (2-7), Alex Rios (11-38 with two taters) and the crushin’ Russian Kevin Kouzmanoff (3-9) have had some success against Feldman.  Fielder (1-8 with a home run) and Adrian Beltre (4-21 with a long ball) haven’t had much success against Feldman.

Injury Updates

 The stRangers are a walking hospital ward.  They have five players (Soto, Profar, Holland, Engel Beltre and Ortiz) on the 60 day DL and six players (Adducci, Figueroa, Kouzmanoff, Murphy, Saunders and Scheppers) on the 15 day DL.  The Astros have four players (Albers, Wojciechowski, White and Cisnero) on the 15 day DL and one player (Crain) on the 60 day DL.

Prediction

Rangers sweep.

submitted by austro

Springtime in Detroit

Houston Astros (10-21) @ Detroit Tigers (17-9)

Ahh, the pleasure of Detroit in the springtime. You never know if you’ll get a 40-degree day or 40-mph winds. Actually, the weather is supposed to be pretty decent this week. There may be some showers Monday afternoon, but they’re supposed to stop and things should be clearing by game time. Tuesday should be sunny with a high in the 60s. There’s another chance of rain on Wednesday, and then Thursday should be sunny with a high in the 70s. Could be worse; could be Seattle.

Monday, May 5, 6:08 CDT
Cosart (1-2, 5.52) vs Scherzer (3-1, 2.08)

The only Tigers to have faced Cosart so far are Rajai Davis and Ian Kinsler, and they’re a combined 2-for-5, so there’s not much history to go with here. Cosart hasn’t been great, but if you ignore his true stinker on 4/18 against the A’s (0.1 IP, 7 ER, 0 K), he’s been averaging 6+ IP and 2.4 ER per start, which ought to keep you in the game. Until the bullpen takes over, of course, at which point you can abandon all hope.

Eight Astros have faced Scherzer, with Fowler having seen him the most (10 ABs). All told, they’re 7-for-39 (.179), so it could be a long night. Scherzer is in the midst of a debate with the Tigers’ front office about his worth. One might hope that would prove to be a distraction, but in his last 3 starts he’s 3-0, 19.0 IP, 1.42 ERA, and 26 Ks. Carter probably can’t wait to start whiffing.

Tuesday, May 6, 6:08 CDT
Oberholtzer (0-5, 5.63) vs Ray (0-0, 0.00)

Again, only two Tigers have faced Oberholtzer: Kinsler (1-for-4) and Andrew Romine (1-for-2). Oberholtzer has been having some issues this spring. The issues stem mainly from the fact that opposing batters, putzes that they are, keep swinging their bats and hitting his pitches. Obie’s last three starts have yielded 14 IP, 27 H, 6 BB, 13 ER, and – not coincidentally – 2 losses. But I’m sure he’ll have no trouble at all with Miguel Cabrera.

Ray came to the Tigers as part of the Doug Fister trade with the Nationals and has been doing well in AAA. He has been pressed into duty because of Anibal Sanchez’s injury (see below), and this will apparently be his first big league action. Ordinarily that would mean doom for the Astros, but this time is different: he’s a lefty. It’s only the unknown right-handers that bury the Astros.

Wednesday, May 7, 6:08 CDT
Peacock (0-2, 5.26) vs Porcello (4-1, 3.66)

Hey, guess how many current Tigers have faced Peacock? If you guess anything other than two, you haven’t been paying attention. Kinsler is 1-for-6, and Davis is 0-for-3. In Peacock’s three starts he’s gone 1-2 with 16.0 IP, 16 H, 12 (!) BB, and 7 ER. As with Cosart, that’s not going to get you on anybody’s All-Star roster, but it ought to keep you in the game. Unless, …

The six Astros who have faced Porcello have put up an ugly combined 2-for-16. Porcello is 3-0 in his last three starts, with a 3.32 ERA and 14Ks. The Astros will have to win this one with pitching and defense, and that hasn’t been a very productive strategy so far this year.

Thursday, May 8, 12:08 CDT
Keuchel (2-2, 3.96) vs Smyly (3-2, 2.45)

Alright, this is more like it: eight Tigers have combined for 40 ABs against Keuchel and produced 12 hits, with Kinsler leading the way at 5-for-15 thanks to all of his appearances with the Rangers. Keuchel’s pattern seems to be that he does ok the first couple of times through a lineup, but then is prone to a blow-up later. That’s certainly what happened in his last start, where he gave up two runs in the first six innings but then walked the bases loaded to start the 7^th and wound up getting charged for two more runs when Cisnero came in and couldn’t work out of the jam.

Five Astros have batted against Smyly, but they only have 6 ABs, and only Presley has a hit. Jared apparently smells a rat, however, since he’s picked up Smyly for his fantasy team this week. Thought you could slip that one by us, didn’t you, Jared? What a turncoat.

Injuries

Astros

Matt Albers: Right shoulder tendonitis.

Jesse Crain: Still recovering from biceps surgery. Could be back in mid-May. Hurry up, guys; the bullpen needs you.

Scott Feldman: Bicep tendonitis.

Alex White: Still recovering from Tommy John surgery. Could be back in May, but I wouldn’t count on it.

Asher Wojo: Still suffering from a lat strain. Day-to-day, I guess.

Tigers

Andy Dirks: Back surgery. Maybe back in June.

Joel Hanrahan: Tommy John surgery, maybe back in June.

Jose Iglesias: Stress fractures in both shins (ouch!). You’re supposed to open the umbrella before you jump off the garage, big guy.

Luke Putkonen: Right elbow inflammation. NTTAWWT.

Bruce Rondon: Out for the season with Tommy John surgery.

Anibal Sanchez: Laceration on right middle finger. Seriously. Must have flipped off the wrong guy.

Special Promotions

During Wednesday’s rain delay, Ausmus will do his rendition of the striptease skate from “Slapshot” while he dances around the bases. Paramedics will be standing by at BudGirl’s house.