Detroit 6
Houston 5

contributed by Mr. Happy

In many ways, this game was emblematic of the type of team the 2015 Astros are. Courtesy of pin-ball machine Scott Feldman (who pitched about as well as he could, bless his heart), the Astros dug themselves into a 5-0 deficit to David Price, who was cruising into the seventh frame with a shutout in the making. Things didn’t look good.

In years past, I’d have abandoned all hope and not even listened to the last three innings. But this team’s never-say-die philosophy keeps them in games. The Good Guys nicked three runs off of the stingy Mr. Price and drove him out of the ball game in the seventh inning. The Astros lead MLB in the number of runs scored from innings seven through nine. They added five to that total yesterday afternoon, tying the game up at 5 on rookie Preston Tucker’s ninth inning pinch home run off of shutdown closer Joakim Soria, who blew his first save opportunity in 14 chances.

Unfortunately, Tony Sipp got sloppy with an 0-2 pitch to the first hitter in the bottom of the eleventh inning, which Tigers rookie backstop James McCann belted over the wall in walkoff fashion to prevail 6-5 in 11 frames. Despite the loss, which dropped the Astros to 27-15, the club made its case with an exclamation point. The Astros come to play every day, and you better bring your A-game to the yard every day, or the Good Guys will clean your clock. I like that attitude.

Get ‘em tomorrow, boys. Until then, zitz ‘em and pound Budweiser.

A’s 2, Astros 1
W: Mujica L: Thatcher S: Clippard

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gamezone

Series Preview

I’ll admit it, I don’t have the energy to care to write a recap when the Astros lose. I just don’t but I push through it and write something anyway. I do not know if anyone reads the recaps, or if mine are just that lackluster compared to others, and I’m woman enough to admit, many of them are way better than mine. I try to be clever and witty but you know, maybe I am not. I think I can be clever in as-it-is-happening moments, but maybe it is all in my head. Just like I try to be clever and witty the Astros try to score runs. Sometimes it just doesn’t happen, like last night.

There are all kinds of discussions regarding whether this team is legit. It is true, they are legit. They are a real baseball team. I am still hesitant to believe they can hold this success up for a full season. It just seems like they go on a win streak and then a losing streak. I like the win streak aspect it is the losing streak aspect that scares the *&($ out of me.

I do not have the same faith in Khris Karter that some do. Would we have to wait almost half a season every season before he starts hitting? I do not know that I have ever seen a player make hitting a homerun so easy. Then again, when he swings and misses it cannot look any uglier.

Then there is Marisnick. Everyone was so excited he started out the season so great, well, now I worry that the wagon got to full and he can’t pull it anymore. I jumped off a while back because I figure anyone I specifically root for will not have the kind of success they should enjoy.

I did like seeing McMullers starting yesterday. I wish Hinch had let him finish the 5th inning. He’s a good looking kid. I was looking at him and was wondering what his dad looked like (because let me be honest, I’m not into May-December things). Well, I saw him on the television. He seems like a nice guy. Not sure where Lance gets his olive skin coloring from but it looks good on him.

Altuve has become the next “Biggio.” And make no mistake, I do not say that lightly. I honestly think he is the type of player they should all aspire to be. He works hard and is humble. Between those two things he is the ideal role model. I wish he spent more time in Houston but knowing how close he is to his family, I understand why he goes home in the off-season. He is a great story and I hope the story is just at the beginning for him.

I was thinking of going to Corpus Christi this upcoming weekend to go to a Hooks game. I did not realize when I started planning this trip that it is Memorial Day weekend. I do not really want to drive on a holiday weekend. Then Correa and McMullers get called up. There are still a lot of outstanding players to see but not sure I want to drive with a lot of other people on the roads. I do not trust other drivers.

I am planning to go to the game tomorrow, so if you are there, leave me a note here and maybe I will stop and say hi.

Houston’s Astros 8
The Canadien’s Provocateurs 4

contributed by NeilT

Handsomely rugged Texas Ranger Captain Burk Lanceman sat in the secret headquarters of Texas government located deep beneath the Capitol in Austin. Across from him sat the leader of the Lone Star State, Governor General Greg Abbott.

“Are you certain, Captain, certain? Can there really be no doubt?”

Ruggedly handsome Captain Lanceman’s response was deliberate, measured. “There can be no doubt, Governor General. We have tracked transmissions from Toronto to closed WalMarts in Livingston and Midland. The transmissions originate in Ottawa. The Canadian’s plan, known as Jade Helm 15, appears to be for a two-prong attack producing an east-west pincer movement focused on the Capitol.

“Governor, there is no doubt that the internal events at the two closed WalMarts holds the key to the end game of the Canadian’s Jade Helm operations. Jade Helm and WalMart are inextricably linked, and the existing evidence suggests two end game probabilities. After serving as the staging area, the WalMart stores will be processing centers for FEMA camp political prisoners, including the leaders of our Texas government, and will continue on an on-going basis as supply and staging centers for continued mopping-up operations.

“In the past four weeks, I have watched over 100 videos on Jade Helm and Walmart. I have performed what researchers call a qualitative, or a descriptive analysis of the available facts. In performing this task, I have looked for patterns among the recent Walmart closings, because it is clear that the closings coincide with Jade Helm. This constitutes Phase One of the analysis. In Phase Two, the findings from Phase One are correlated to known or strongly suspected events connected to Jade Helm and other areas of concern related to State security. Subsequently, this kind of descriptive analysis can yield strong clues as to the true intent of where Jade Helm is headed and what the WalMart role consists of in conjunction with Jade Helm. There is no doubt that the events are inextricably linked, and that the mastermind behind them is the Canadian.”

“But Captain Lanceman, what can we do!” Governor General Abbott was clearly disturbed.

“We believe that the creation and maintenance of a covert and preplanned covert guerrilla warfare secret undercover force to be secretly and covertly pre-positioned in an area that will then likely be overrun by the invading Canadian forces. Think Viet Cong, only from Quebec. The Canadian’s plan is to “Master the Human Domain” by insertion of stealth forces based upon the use of “infiltration techniques.” The first two purposes of Jade Helm are dissident extraction and martial law to carry out the geographic isolation of troubled areas. The third goal is the popularization of ice hockey.

“Governor General, you must activate Texas’s greatest hope. I have brought you a letter to warn the Texas Brigade.”

Governor General Abbott was clearly astonished. “But Captain Lanceman, the Texas Brigade has not been activated since 1865!”

“Yes Governor General, but they, our greatest patriots, stand ready for this purpose.” Handsomely rugged Captain Lanceman passed the letter to Governor General Abbott.

“To address concerns of Texas citizens and to ensure that Texas communities remain safe, secure and informed about military procedures occurring in their vicinity, I am directing the Texas State Guard to monitor Operation Jade Helm 15. During the training operation, it is important that Texans know their safety, constitutional rights, private property rights and civil liberties will not be infringed.”

***
“Sacre bleu!” cried Senator Cruse, code name the Canadian. “Burk Lanceman has taken the bait! Jean Jacques,” he called to his chief of staff, “bring me tonight’s play-by-play!”

For years the Canadians, plotting against the government in Texas, had raised a super-race of baseball players whose sole purpose was to communicate to inserted Canadian agents the coded plans and schemes of the Canadians. These baseball players, all now on the Toronto Blue Jays, were raised by the Canadian Royal Mounties from birth to play baseball as it had never been played before. No action on the field was random: all was controlled, designed, and communicating play-by-play Toronto’s coded messages.

“Look Jean Jacques, how our brave Canadiens make Keuchel struggle. Four earned runs in only six innings pitched! They are telling us that the Texas government is buying our fake invasion plans!

“And now look, how they allow the bullpen to shut them down! Mon dieu! They are affirming to us that there is no real invasion! Harris, Qualls (yes even Qualls), and Fields! in the 7th, 8th, and 9th are telling us there is no real invasion.

“Now look, here, with home runs by Springer, off Dickey in the 3rd, Altuve (3 RBI) off Dickey in the 5th, with 422 feet, and Valbuena, off Tepera in the 7th! And the two doubles by Tucker off Dickey and the one by Carter in the 2nd! Jean Jacques! They are letting us know that by sending out his letter, the Texans will not be ready when it is time for the real invasion! We have at last destroyed the credibility of our nemesis, Captain Burk Lanceman!”

It had been a brilliant game by the agent provocateurs of the Canadian government. Except for troubled innings by Keuchel, the game had been arranged so that the Texans believed that they were in control, and that things had been played out well. Little did they know that the real invasion, the Canadian invasion, was coming. And the only Texan who could stop it, handsomely rugged Captain Burk Lanceman, had lost his credibility on a Canadian ruse.

Astros 6 Blue Jays 4
WP Fields (2-0)
LP Loup (1-2)
S Qualls (4)

contributed by Mr. Happy

Buttressed by a 3-4 night from Preston Tucker and another 2.2 frames of scoreless relief from the bully, the Good Guys bested Toronto 6-4 before 15,777 last night at MMPUS. While the home nine didn’t reach the seats last night, they doubled their pleasure all night with two-baggers. Indeed, five of the eight Astro hits were doubles. Eight and nine in the order was 4-7 with three doubles and three ribbies. Loup was pretty bad last night, not only blowing a save but getting hung with the big L. He didn’t retire any of the four hitters he faced in the seventh inning.

How long will the Hinchman continue to stick with K’ing Chris Carter? He’s so lost that he doesn’t know where he is lost from. Will the Astros continue to play batting average limbo with Carter? He’s at .150 now. How low can it go?

Carmonandez pitched about as well as he can last night (six hits and four earnies). He got off to a rough start in the top of the first frame when both Joey Bats and Edwin Encarnacion took him way out of the yard. About the best you can say about his pitching performance last night was that he ate up 6.1 innings. If, and this is a big if, the Astros can indeed contend in 2015, I don’t think that it will be Carmonandez who pitches in that four all year. I know that young phenom Lance McCullers, Jr. was just moved up to Fresno. I’ll be watching his starts there with great interest, because he could be in the equation in August or September.

Despite scoring six runs, which has been difficult lately, the hitters really didn’t have a very good night. Collectively, the Astros were only 8-31. The only two players who had multi-hit games were the Piranha (big surprise-who also had two stolen bags) and Tucker. Strikeouts continue to plague the Good Guys, as they collected 13 more last night. Marisnick, who’s been very cold lately, earned a golden sombrero in the leadoff spot. However, for all of their shortcomings at the dish, the Astros continue to shine in the field. The club again had no errors, and the infield notched three twin killings. The pitcher’s best friend indeed.

All in all, it’s another W, but I really like it because it was another come-from-behind win. I just don’t think that the ball club would have won this type of game even a year ago. Let’s hope that they keep winning.