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  • News (Page 92)

Pigeons On The Grass Alas

Posted on April 6, 2013 by Ron Brand in Featured, Game Recaps

Athletics 7
Astros 3

contributed by NeilT

Kris and I are in Austin for the third Foodways Texas Symposium. It’s our second, and this year the topic is barbecue. The first night Aaron Franklin served brisket and pulled pork. Friday night Jim Goode and Brian Caswell barbecued crabs, shrimp and oysters. It was spectacular. I was full, and a little beered up, and didn’t want to write a recap, so I let Oakland’s most famous daughter write it.

The game, the game was not. Peacock was doing something and standing is one doing something and standing. Someone was doing something and was standing. Coco Crisp led with a homer. Peacock walked two more in the first inning, gave up a single and a walk in the second, got through the third and the fourth, gave up a one-out double in the fifth, and then was pulled for Xavier Cedeno. I don’t know why. After was a seven-run inning, with a Marwin Gonzalez chop-off bases-loaded error, 13 batters, 6 hits, and 4 walks. Two pitchers after Peacock, Xavier Cedeno who achieved infinity with three earned runs and no outs, and Rhiner Cruz. Pigeons on the grass alas.

Meanwhile the Astros struck out thrice in the first, twice in the second, twice in the third, and once in the fifth. They struck out five more times. Wallace struck out three times on four at-bats, Ankiel struck out every plate appearance, so seven of the thirteen strike outs were split between Wallace and Ankiel, but rose is a rose is a rose. To strike out is to strike out is to strike out is to strike out is to strike out is to strike out is to strike out is to strike out is to strike out is to strike out is to strike out is to strike out. When in France one must adapt oneself to the smell of a urinal.

These unifoms look good, but you can either buy clothes or buy pictures. It’s that simple.

Cruz gave up two more singles in the 6th, but Donaldson grounded into a double play, Altuve to Wallace. Wright, Armbriz, and Veras finished the 7th, 8th, and 9th, with one walk in the 9th The offense picked up too. Gonzalez doubled in the 6th and scored on an Altuve single. Maxwell got his third extra base hit in the 7th and scored on a Dominguez single. Gonzalez singled, Altuve walked, and then with the bases loaded Wallace managed not to strike out with a fly ball out to center. For Wallace, there is no there there.

In the 9th Castro doubled, was moved to third on a second Dominguez double, and scored on a Gonzalez ground-out. I have been rich and I have been poor. It’s better to be rich.

Do not let the strike-outs worry you. One does not get better but different and older and that is a pleasure. It takes a lot of time to be a genius, you have to sit around so much doing nothing, really doing nothing. A vegetable garden in the beginning looks so promising and then after all little by litle it grows nothing but vegetables, nothing, nothing but vegetables.

WELCOME TO THE CENOZOIC ERA

Posted on April 4, 2013 by Dark Star in Featured, News, Series Previews

The dinosaurs are all dead and gone now, deader than fuck … or, as my friend C-4 would say, they were never here at all; which is kind of stupid, since C-4 existed amongst the biggest T. Rex’s and Stegosaurus’s of all … but anyway, what the fuck? … can’t say anything bad about C-4, he was my favorite out of all of them — for a brief, shining time … anyway, where was I? … Oh, yeah … the dinosaurs are all dead and gone, having fallen victim to some kind of catastrophic event, a big-ass bang or explosion or something … right now, there is nothing running around out there but a bunch of cockroaches and centipedes and shit … Read More

Astros Meet Expectations

Posted on April 4, 2013 by Ron Brand in Featured, Game Recaps

Astros lose to Rangers 4-0

W: Ogando (1-0)
L: Humber (0-1)

contributed by Sphinx Drummond

Ah, a day game. A businessman’s special. The euphoria that wafted through and around MMP Monday like napalm on a Vietnam delta circa 1967, had long dissipated and been replaced by the turd-like smell of a shitty baseball team.

To hear most in the media and elsewhere, you’d think the Astros were the worst team in baseball with the cheapest payroll. Well, maybe they are, but to me they are also a collection of brave young misfits who show fortitude and comraderie every time they take the field. The Astro players have to be aware of their low standing but they don’t let it get them down, they continue to show up and make an effort in spite of the overwhelming odds. Plus as MLB players, they get paid well. And it’s baseball.

Wednesday afternoon, Ranger starter Alexi Ogando picked up where Yu Darvish left off and proceeded to whiff one Astro after another. It was a horrible performance by the brave and outmatched Astro hitters, spoiling a good outing by Philip Humber who gave up only one run on five hits through 5 and 2/3 innings. Ogando, who was pitching like his face had once caught on fire and somebody used an ice pick to put it out, was marvelous in picking up the win while striking out 10 courageous Astros before being relieved after 6 and 1/3 innings. In all the Astros struck out a total of 15 times–quite the opposite of impressive, if you’re still an Astro fan.

It’s easy to evaluate the performance of a bad team – when they win they overachieve, when they lose they meet expectations. I don‘t see this team overachieving much.

Marwin Sez Yu Ain’t Perfect

Posted on April 3, 2013 by Ron Brand in Featured, Game Recaps

Rangers 7, Astros 0

W: Darvish (1-0)
L: Harrell (0-1)

Contributed by Reuben

This week I am on vacation in a sleepy little town about an hour south of Charleston, South Carolina called Edisto Beach. Jasper Johns once had a studio here, but so far no one I’ve encountered, while biking around, strolling along the beach, or shopping at the Piggly Wiggly, has looked likely to have any idea who Jasper Johns is. A glance at the Edisto Chamber of Commerce website reveals many suggested cultural and recreational activities to do… in Charleston. What I love about it, though, is that it’s a nice, quiet, un-hyped place to be with your extended family and look at the ocean and play board games and cook shrimp. My youngest niece, Lily, is 3, and she’s quite the uber-cute ball of squealing energy in such a setting. When’s she not being hypnotized by the Lorax DVD, she loves to fight with my brother and/or me, pretending we’re monsters or some kind of bad guys. She and my brother have developed a little routine where they just take turns pointing at each other and saying “You get out of MY house!” giggle giggle “YOU get out of MY house!” It can go on for quite some time, because she is very, very amused by it. So I almost titled this recap “Yu Get Out of My House,” but I felt like Marwin really deserved to be included. Maybe I’ll save that one for when the Astros actually beat Darvish, at Minute Maid.

I don’t really feel like I need to say anything about the game itself, so I’ll just send you over to The Most Beautiful Single Ever Hit In A 7-0 Losing Cause.

Opening Day 2013 – If You Believe, It Can Come True

Posted on April 2, 2013 by Ron Brand in Featured, Game Recaps

The first frosty mug at Alice’s Tall Texan went down so smooth that I was ready for another. Ice cold malty Bock with friends, talking baseball and making new friends. Easter Sunday, time for another redemption that we really never dared to plan.

It was great seeing everyone at Spanish Flowers. Bags of chips and untold bowls of salsa were scarfed down amid the squeals of infants, wearing their Easter outfits while trapped in high chairs. From there the group moved on to the Flying Saucer for more cameraderie and then on to the ballpark.

Surprisingly, the day was clear and no clouds obscured our view of the field. The Sherpas didn’t think to leave us with bottles of oxygen, so we and the other 20-odd thousand in the upper reaches were left to our own devices. Following an outstanding rendition of the national anthem by Lyle Lovett, new #1 pitcher Bud Norris got the American League Houston Astros era under way with a strike.

Bud fought his command through much of the night but managed to make pitch after pitch when it counted. Jose Altuve smacked the first pitch he saw for the first AL hit, a single. Outstanding plays in the field were a nice surprise, but in many ways this night belonged to Justin Maxwell. Two triples, two runs scored, two RBI, one great catch against the wall and one great ‘catch’ of a soft liner were the bedrock that the Astros’ 4-0 lead was built on.

In the sixth, Norris was tiring and the Rangers reached him for two runs before Bedard was brought in to relieve. Unconventional, but the move was effective and after the theatrics of Rick Ankiel’s two-out, 3-2 pinch three-run jack deep into the right field stands, this one was over.

Deflated, the jackal fans from Dallas headed for the exits after Ankiel’s shot and Astro fans were left to stand and cheer the home team’s first Opening Day win since 2006. It was a great night and a great celebration for all of us.

Requiem for a Gunslinger – Rangers at Astros

Posted on March 30, 2013 by Ron Brand in Featured, Series Previews

Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.

“Our elders say that the sun will shine on those who stand before it shines on those who kneel under them.”

“When the moon is shining the cripple becomes hungry for a walk.”

“A man who calls his kinsmen to a feast does not do so to save them from starving. They all have food in their own homes. When we gather together in the moonlit village ground it is not because of the moon. Every man can see it in his own compound. We come together because it is good for kinsmen to do so.”

“I am Evil Forest. I kill a man on the day that his life is sweetest to him.”

* * *

The 1979 season drew to a close, and the Astros finished 1 1/2 games out of first place behind Cincinnati. A wretched offense and the lack of a fourth starter somehow still teased 89 wins, fifteen more than the previous year. J. R. Richard was truly feared and at the top of his game, but the supporting cast was wanting. So very close, but those last steps up the mountain would prove more difficult and more costly than all the ones that had gone before.

In 1979, there was really only one Gunslinger, and the Astros needed him to prove that they were serious at last. Four no-hitters, over 2400 strikeouts, 383 in one season, a fastball that often touched 100 miles per hour and a knee-buckling curve that couldn’t be ignored had placed Nolan Ryan in the pantheon. When Ryan was on the mound, the game was reduced to a series of one-on-one confrontations and that’s the way he liked it. His history of pitching for weak teams shaped his approach, seeding the mythic appeal of One Man Against All Comers. Proud and alone, he would stand or fall based on the strength of his peerless right arm.

This Gunslinger ethos matched up well with Houston, and they made him the highest paid player in the game with that three-year, $3.5 million dollar contract before the 1980 season. The million dollar club option in the fourth year was expected to be Nolan’s last before he hung up the leather for Alvin, to ranch and raise his kids. Now all the Gunslinger had to do was to ride into town and take center stage, mowing down challengers over the seasons and hoisting the Astros into the postseason.

So he did. Three times in seven seasons the Astros made it to the playoffs. Ryan’s pitching wasn’t the only reason, but he was the public persona of the team, the shiny gold belt buckle or the star behind the capital H. With his growing success as a gunslinger in a gunslinging town, a better cast followed that improved the team steadily. Now in the reflected light of success, the Astros were on the map nationally.

The knock on Nolan had always been that he played for himself and because of that was a .500 pitcher. His gifts were such that reducing the singular conflicts might mean denying the special talent, denying the very reason for his celebrity. Celebrity it truly was, for he was alone in the American conscience as the Gunslinger Personified. He transcended the sport, his legend drawing upon the history of the American Experience and those echoes were wildly popular. “Things happen when I pitch,” he said. “A sinker-ball pitcher gets three ground outs and nothing happens. It’s boring watching guys get singles and groundouts. My games are exciting.”

The trappings of this celebrity warped that initial expectation of ending after four years in Houston. After all, he was still at the top of his game, still winning those challenges, and his star continued to grow and his legend exploded. A fifth no-hitter. 3,509 strikeouts, then unthinkably on to more than 4,700. His continued success defied all of the concepts of the aging ballplayer. At the age of 40, Ryan led the National League with a 2.76 ERA and 270 strikeouts. Despite the 8-16 record that year, he finished fifth in the Cy Young voting. As Mark Belanger said, “It’s a moral victory not to strike out against him.” Age and those 16 losses were difficult foes to subdue, however. Fearing the unkind diminution that age was sure to take on the Gunslinger, Astros owner John McMullen offered to re-sign the star but with a 20% pay cut.

===============

Texas Rangers vs. Houston Astros
Sunday, March 31, 7:05 PM CDT, Minute Maid Park

Matt Harrison, LHP – 18-11, 3.29

Bud Norris, RHP – 7-13, 4.65

Two pitchers getting their first Opening Day assignments. Norris pitches pretty well in MMPUS, but he’s prone to getting that fastball up and against this team, that’s not the way to stay in the game for long.

Promotions: Opening Day Street Fest, Schedule Magnet Presented By United Airlines

=============

Texas Rangers vs. Houston Astros
Tuesday, April 2, 7:10 PM CDT, Minute Maid Park

Yu Darvish, RHP – 16-9, 3.90

Darvish held the Astros to two runs in eight innings last season, the only time he’s faced Houston. He’s expected to be much, much better this year. Great.

Lucas Harrell, RHP – 11-11, 3.76

A groundball pitcher with a good sinker, Harrell has a decent puncher’s chance to go deep in this one. Say, a Chuck Wepner’s chance.

==============

Texas Rangers vs. Houston Astros
Wednesday, April 3, 1:10 PM CDT, Minute Maid Park

Alexi Ogando, RHP – 2-0, 3.27

Ogando is making the conversion from reliever to starter. What better way to do this than against Houston?

Philip Humber, RHP – 5-5, 6.44

Humber has thrown more perfect games than anyone on either team.

==============

Surely some revelation is at hand;
Surely the Second Coming is at hand.
The Second Coming! Hardly are those words out
When a vast image out of Spiritus Mundi
Troubles my sight: a waste of desert sand;
A shape with lion body and the head of a man,
A gaze blank and pitiless as the sun,
Is moving its slow thighs, while all about it
Wind shadows of the indignant desert birds.

“There is no story that is not true.”

“‘When did you become a shivering old woman,’ Okonkwo asked himself, ‘you, who are known in all the nine villages for your valor in war? How can a man who has killed five men in battle fall to pieces because he has added a boy to their number? Okonkwo, you have become a woman indeed.'”

“But he was not the man to go about telling his neighbors that he was in error. And so people said he had no respect for the gods of the clan. His enemies said that his good fortune had gone to his head.”

“It was like beginning life anew without the vigor and enthusiasm of youth, like learning to become left-handed in old age.”

* * *

Once again The Gunslinger was cast off from his home, sent away because no one could do what he had already done, and anyone could do what was left for him to do. In Anaheim, they figured it was easy to find .500 pitchers for much less money, so they let Nolan Ryan walk. At 42, Ryan was already past where anyone else had been on the thin ice of possibility. He couldn’t possibly have anything left, and no owner in his right mind would commit to paying what he wanted, only to see it all go down the tubes.

Even more futile and downtrodden than the Astros had been, the Texas Rangers had won as many as 94 games once, in 1977. Since then the club had slid into that hell of 65-75 wins a season, never able to crack the code that would bring them to the next level. Motivated by the burning need to imprint his middle fingers on the psyche of the Astros’ owner, Ryan’s signing provided the Rangers with a sorely-needed marquee draw and legitimacy in the baseball world. His five years with the Rangers didn’t bring any postseason appearances – the best finish the team had was 86-76 in his final year – but his mythic status finally took on a size commensurate with the Gunslinger’s ego. Every start was An Event, covered ad nauseum by national press, filled with entire stadiums lighting up from camera flashes as he struck out challenger after challenger. Personal rewards were the ultimate culmination of a career seen through the lens of individual challenge and combat; he was a Texan, and he pitched for the Rangers, but Nolan Ryan was and always had been a mercenary, a modern gladiator. Accepting his pay and then turning a team game into a series of small battles that he needed to win by himself. This was the basis of his story. The fact that he won so many of them, raising his middle fingers to the disbelievers, is what made him so special.

Fittingly, the end occurred on the field when he blew out his elbow, trying to win another battle. Stopped at last, the tidal wave of myth crested and slowly drew back. After his playing days Ryan struggled to find ways to quell his restlessness, his need for personal victory that in the end could not be stilled. Dabbling in business and politics, he found that the friends he’d made while riding high as gunslinger weren’t quite as deferential now. He found that courtesies were only extended based on a quid pro quo, not freely given just because he had been The Gunslinger who once had slain all comers. This time, he’d cast himself adrift into a world that no longer cared about his every move but would like an autograph.

==============

The darkness drops again but now I know
That twenty centuries of stony sleep
Were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle,
And what rough beast, its hour come round at last,
Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?

“The white man is very clever. He came quietly and peaceably with his religion. We were amused at his foolishness and allowed him to stay. Now he has won our brothers, and our clan can no longer act like one. He has put a knife on the things that held us together and we have fallen apart.”

“Living fire begets cold, impotent ash.”

“No matter how prosperous a man was, if he was unable to rule his women and his children (and especially his women) he was not really a man.”

“Okonkwo stood looking at the dead man. He knew that Umuofia would not go to war. He knew because they had let the other messengers escape. They had broken into tumult instead of action. He discerned fright in that tumult. He heard voices asking: ‘Why did he do it?'”

“It is against our custom, It is an abomination for a man to take his own life. It is an offense against the Earth, and a man who commits it will not be buried by his clansmen. His body is evil, and only strangers may touch it.”

* * *

Eventually he came back to the game. It was the place where his currency was brightest and crispest; the constant attempts to relive youth through remembrance fill the veins of baseball and pump a new but different life into the husks of old stars. Like washed-up boxers retelling dim stories in a bar, they come alive and feast on memories. He parlayed his wealth and connections first into significant Texas minor league ownership and then he accepted the mercenary’s role once more and became the public face of a group who purchased the Rangers. The competitive fire was burning hard in him still; the challenges were shadowy and potent. It was easy for Ryan to work the public and grin for politicians, but fending off the quizzical bumps he got from all directions at the hands of multi-billionaires threatened to be overwhelming. The old gunslinger had learned some tricks though, and soon enough he could function in this new arena too. He learned the game of keeping focus off of yourself, while making sure that what he wanted to do didn’t interfere with enough of the Really Big Money to cause him problems.

It was an inevitable but delicious circumstance that resulted in the takeover of Texas baseball. Sticking it to Houston had long ago been replaced by much larger challenges, but in order for him to be successful with the Rangers he had to do just that – find ways to dominate the competition on every possible front. An addled and complacent Astro owner, flush with success but without a plan to maintain it, provided the perfect opportunity and Ryan seeded the state with an aggressive crop that strangled the Astros into submission. Their minor league teams fled the state. The major league team became a moribund laughingstock, ripe for the ultimate takeover, and was finally subjugated as weak and ineffectual prey in a killing field designed to strip them of all cover.

Internally though, the Rangers were slipping. Ryan’s bullish style and outsized ego resulted in a series of missteps that required action by other hands on the rudder. Once this realization became public, it was now more clear than ever that Ryan had been used again, his celebrity and mystique bartered for public interest and acceptance as long as it didn’t interfere with the larger questions at hand. At 66, facing the possibility that he couldn’t win this last challenge, he played the last public card he could and floated the humiliation to the press. The call to arms was noted, but not heeded. This is the last showdown for the old gunslinger.

===============

Much has changed for the Astros since 2012; actually, almost all has changed for them. It’s still the same ballpark, but new paint and colors are everywhere as they cast bread and circuses to the fans. New players, new broadcasters, new front office, new logo and uniforms, new business model, new frontiers in public relations stumbling. It’s normal to see extensive change under new ownership and expected that those changes would be even more pervasive when a failing one is taken over. Any way you look at it, it’s a New Era. Ice Age or Age of Reason? We aren’t going to have answers to these questions for years. It is, however, baseball season. It’s the greatest game, and we still get to see it played in Houston, night after night. Take the solace you can in this and continue your journey with patience. There is a horizon, and the sun does rise above it.

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