Astros 1, Mariners 4
W:Farquhar (3-1)L:Foltynewicz (0-1)SV:Rodney (44)
recap

I have to admit, this game was hard to watch. I was able to watch until Downs got his first out and the rest I do not remember. Comes to find out the Astros lost in the bottom of the eighth inning. Two walks and a triple, gives the Mariners the lead and they ultimately win the game. At least Michael Foltynewicz tried, but he needs to figure it out. He had a bit of a rough outing when I saw him pitch in Houston. He’s got some stuff and seems to need to locate it better.

Altuve took the night easy going 0-3 (he did have a walk), but Singleton got two walks while Grossman got 3 hits on the night. Go figure.

Well, the Astros won’t win them all, but they’ve won more than the last couple seasons so that is a good thing, right?

On a personal note, I went to Dallas to watch the Cowboys on Sunday. As a Cowboys fan, it was embarrassing that the AT&T Stadium looked more like Candlestick Park (or wherever that other team plays). But, I could have handled that. I could handle my team playing the way it did (after all the defensive wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be). But, I could not handle some 49er fans, who didn’t stand for the National Anthem, offer me his Kaepernick Jersey. He’s lucky I was so pissed I wasn’t really thinking straight. They were worse than Cubs and Rangers fans together. I should have taken the jersey with a polite thank you. There are any number of things I could have done with it. After all, the douche did offer it to me. I also realize that every team has these fans, but those just topped it off. I get it, your team is winning, kudos to them but a big FU to that fan and his buddies.

On another personal note, it seems lately that I have friends passing away from cancer. That truly sucks and puts things like the above into the right prospective. I would like my team to win, but I’ll forget Sunday’s game a lot sooner than I’ll ever forget my friend Gosia. RIP my friend.

Astros 4, A’s 3

Submitted by Reuben

It’s not often that the Astros manage to rally in the 7th inning against a tough pitcher and not only tie the game but take the lead. And it’s really not often that they are able to rally in the 9th inning and turn around a deficit. So I’m guessing it’s extremely rare that they achieve both of those feats in the same game, yet that is exactly what happened Sunday afternoon in Oakland.

I wasn’t even expecting to be able to catch much of this game. I was flying back from visiting my folks in North Carolina and had a 6pm ET flight. I got to the airport at 5, went through security and found my gate, and then turned on the radio broadcast on my headphones while I waiting for boarding to begin. 6pm came and went and eventually we were informed that there weather in Charlotte, where my connection was, and that we would be “updated” again at 7 – the time we were originally scheduled to actually land in Charlotte.

So I got to hear the 7th-inning rally, which was great. I texted my dad, wondering who Lawless would use as closer with Qualls admitting that the A’s were his Daddy. Maybe Keuchel could throw another CG? Nope, was the near-immediate answer from the game, as Dallas surrendered a 2-run bomb to former Stro-property Nate Freiman. I focused on my book for a while before reluctantly turning the game back on.

Things got interesting in the 9th. A leadoff walk to Marwin was followed by 1-out walks to Krauss and Grossman. Then Ryan Cook’s wildness infected Fernando Abad, and soon the Astros had scored 2 runs without the benefit of a hit.

Then we heard from the captain that we were finally going to take off. Which was great news, because the window was quickly closing on any shot I had at making my connecting flight. But, the game wasn’t over and the Astros holding a 1-run lead in the bottom of the 9th against the A’s was about as automatic as a stick shift. At least Lawless had the sense to use Sipp. His decision to have Fowler bunt Altuve to 2nd base earlier had me questioning his sanity/IQ.

We started to taxi over to the runway. Crap, hurry up, Sipperstar. He tried to oblige, getting the first two batters out. Then a walk to zero-HR-hitting Craig Gentry with clutch-power-hitting-Astro-killah Josh Donaldson on deck. Shit, Sipp. Now Fields was coming in. Take off was imminent. Finally Fields finished his warm-up tosses and play resumed. The engines fired up, simulating a Fields fastball (some say Josh might be the best player on the team, don’tyouknow). It seemed inevitable that we would be way up in the air, out of reach of my phone’s 3G network, before the at-bat could end, and I would have to wait, not knowing the result of an annoying-ass cliffhanger, until we got to Charlotte – at which point, certainly, it would turn out Donaldson had hit a walk-off homer.

But he didn’t, and Fields got strike 3 after we left the ground but about 3 seconds before I lost the signal. So melodramatic, these Astros. Anyway, afterwards, OrangeWhoopass’s NeilT pointed out the real significance of what the win meant:

Astros 4
White Elephants 3

contributed by NeilT

Whenever the Astros play the As, it reminds me of their general manager, Mr. Bean, and it makes me want to talk statistics. Being myself a statistics god, there aren’t many with my level of expertise to talk to, so I headed off to Montrose. As the Talk Zone recognized long ago, statistics are gay, and there’s no place like a gay bar to talk numbers. Did you know that? There’s even a gay bar in Montrose called Numbers?

Now me, I go to TCs and look for Miss Lola Laloush. She has two great interests in life, baseball and drag racing. I’m sure she could have some great conversations with DarkStar about that 454 Chevelle SS, ‘cause I suspect she’s all about the big engines. But I’m not interested in that stuff. I wanted to talk baseball, and I hadn’t seen Miss Lola since I showed up at City Hall to explain to city council the dangers of transsexual third basemen in the clubhouse. Truth be told—–and don’t tell Kris—I’ve got just a bit of a crush on Miss Lola. She is one fine looking woman, and why she hangs out at a gay bar in Montrose is beyond me.

They know me at TCs ‘cause Miss Lola has introduced me around, and of course everybody there knows their baseball. Last year when I broke down crying at the end of the season they patted my shoulder, gave me a Shiner, and let me cry. I knew I wasn’t the first guy at TCs to cry about the Astros.

But for the second time this season, I showed up at TCs and Miss Lola wasn’t there. I should have called her, but I guess I think she’s always there. I asked the bartender and he said, “haven’t you heard? She’s gone to work for the Astros.”

Knock me down with a boa feather.

“Miss Lola went to work for the Astros?” I asked. “Yep,” says the bartender, “right after the media storm about Porter’s firing.”

Apparently after the Astros fired Porter, the Astros searched for someone who understood the team’s goals and who knew how to deal with the public, and everyone mentioned Miss Lola. “Her business is the public, and did you know she has a physics degree?” That’s what the bartender told me: he said it was just like Mike Fast. She’s not from Oklahoma, though. She got her masters from the Instituto Tecnológico y de Estudios Superiores de Monterrey. Think of that. A beautiful woman with a physics masters, from Monterrey. Did I mention she was one fine looking woman?

“No one,” said the bartender, “knows appearances like Miss Lola.” Well damn, I thought. Two things I’ve learned about Miss Lola that I didn’t know: (1) She has a masters in physics; and (2) she’s gone to work for the Astros. I already knew that Miss Lola knew how to make things look good.

I was on my third Shiner. I can’t think of anyone better the Astros could have hired, because she will certainly charm the public. And the Astros need some public relations expertise. Hopefully I’ll catch up with Miss Lola soon, and I’ll let you know what she says about her new job in the front office.

***

Meanwhile I’m thinking nothing helps public relations like winning. Oberholtzer kept things close over 6 innings, with 7 hits and 3 earned runs, 3 walks, and 1 strike out. Singleton led things off in the third with a homer, but the A’s went ahead in the bottom of the inning with 3 runs on 72 singles, two walks, and a visit to the mound. In the fourth, Altuve singled, got his 51st steal, and came home on a Chris Carter single. The Astros went ahead in the 6th after Altuve singled and was driven home by cHRis Carter. Altuve now has 196 hits, which is 15 behind Biggio’s team record and 25 ahead of Cabrera with 171. His average is back over .340. Carter has 36 HRs, tied for second with Stanton and one behind Cruz. This team may not be all Carter and Altuve, but it sure seems that way.

Veras replaced Oberholtzer for the last 2 outs of the seventh. Sipperstar pitched the eighth and closed out the 9th, with 4 outs on the 8th on a wild pitch.

Astros complete mini-sweep of 2-game series with a 4-1 win.

WP: Collin McHugh (8-9)
LP: Jered Weaver (15-8)
SV: Chad Qualls (17)

contributed by Sphinx Drummond

Chris Carter has become a monster. He’s a threat to hit a home run every time he comes to the plate. He set the Astros franchise record for multihomer games in a season Wednesday with his seventh. His current total of 35 is the most homers by an Astros player since Lance Berkman hit 45 in 2006. His strike outs are down too.

The Astros scored first in the second inning when Chris Carter lead off with a solo shot to LF. The Angels quickly came back to tie the game with a run of their own in the top of the third. Dexter Fowler walked with one out in the fourth and stole second with two outs. Jason Castro’s single scored Fowler to put Houston up 2-1.

The Astros entered the bottom of the 8th with a measly one run lead and following a Marwin Gonzalez line out to left field, Jose Altuve scalded one to left for a double. Dexter Fowler popped out to short and Altuve advanced to third on a balk. Chris Carter, the next batter, smacked his second homer of the game to give the Astros a 4-1 lead.

Collin McHugh pitched a fine game, allowing only 4 hits through 7.2 innings. He struck out 8 and allowed only one run to score. Jose Veras got his man to finish the top of the 8th inning and Chad Qualls was perfect to close the 9th, for his 17th save of the year.

Tom Lawless still doesn’t know the bitter taste of defeat.

Thursday is a travel day. The Good Guys head to the San Francisco Bay Area where they will continue to play the spoiler when they take on the Oakland Athletics on Friday. Hope the team’s vaccinations are up to date, the Oakland Coliseum has plumbing problems and the Samardzija virus takes the hill against Brett Olberholtzer at 8:05 PM CST.

Attendance – 16949
Game Time – 2:37
Temperature – 73

Astros 3, Rangers 2

Submitted by Reuben

Here’s another way in which Jose Altuve is amazing: you may be stunned, as I was, to learn that Sunday’s 4-hit performance tied a career high for him. As brilliant as he’s been this year, and as hot as he’s been at times throughout his young career, it’s hard to believe he’s never had a 5-hit game. Eight times he’s reached 4 hits; unsurprisingly, half of those have come this season alone.

Once again, one of those hits was crucial: a 2-out single to center off of Ranger Closer Neftali Feliz to drive in Marisnick with the go-ahead run. Earlier in the game Altuve had rapped a pair of doubles, but he was stranded both times.

Dominguez had two huge hits of his own to snap out of another slump. In the bottom of the 2nd, Matty D came up with 2 outs and Castro on 2nd base. Ashby began talking about how Dominguez had been working on nothing but hitting the ball the other way in BP, and right as he was about to say “but I doubt he can carry that over into games” Matt lined a beautiful single to right field to tie the game at 1. In the 8th inning he crushed a 1-0 slider from long-time Astro nemesis Neal Cotts into the façade above the Crawford Boxes, or maybe even up on the train tracks; either way, it was an impressive blast, reminiscent of the Matty D of 2013, who seemed to excel against tough relievers with the game on the line. Hopefully he can approximate that guy for the rest of the season.

After Dominguez’ homer tied the game, Marisnick continued the rally by getting plunked on the upper left arm. Unlike the Rangers’ Rougned Odor, who had spun around and stomped toward first like a big macho tough guy after getting hit on his 2-inch thick arm pad by Keuchel, Marisnick, with no padding safe his jersey sleeve, simply shrugged it off and took his base. He then showed off his speed and baserunning savvy, stealing 2nd base – no easy feat with a lefty on the mound and cannon-armed Chorinos behind the dish – and moving up on a grounder to the 3rd baseman, dancing off of the bag and then breaking for 3rd as soon as Beltre made his throw to 1st.

Ranger manager Ron Washington then brought in Feliz to pitch to Grossman, who worked a 5-pitch walk to bring Altuve to the plate. As Washington put it after the game, “It shouldn’t have been [Altuve]. It should have been Grossman. If you’re going to get beat, get beat by Grossman, not Altuve.”

The 3 runs wouldn’t have been enough, of course, without another stellar performance by Keuchel, who has gone at least 7 innings four games in a row, and 7 out of 8. Dallas went winless in August despite a 3.21 ERA for the month, including 42 IP and a Complete Game. Following Keuchel with mercifully scoreless innings were a wobbly Veras and drama-free Qualls to close it out and clinch the 3-games-to-1 series victory, and an incredibly-satisfying come-from-behind win.

***

Futility Watch: Bo Porter’s squad went 4-3 on the week to improve to 59-79 on the season, “good” enough for 27th-best in MLB. They are now within spitting distance of the Twins (1 game ahead), Red Sox (2), and Cubs (2.5), and have increased their cushion over the dead-last Rangers to 5 games.

Astros 2, Rangers 0

HoChen is my personal guru, so I take his Zen Teachings to heart.

“Feast your eyes, glut your soul,” as Erik the Phantom requests timelessly. Gaze upon it, Ranger bandwagon fools, for it is gone from your strip mall suburbia prison and back where it belongs, safely nestled in a downtown ballpark, safe to be ignored by the dozens who will pass it by daily. I’m glad it meant something to you, because the only thing it means to us is that you don’t have it.