OrangeWhoopass
  • Home
  • About
  • Forums
  • News
    • Game Recaps
    • Series Previews
    • News You Can Use
    • SNS
      • SnS TWIB
    • TRWD
  • Editorials
    • Columnistas
    • Crunch Time
    • Dark Matter
    • From Left Field
      • Bleacher Rap
      • Brushback
    • From The Dugout
    • Glad You Asked
    • Limey Time
    • Pine Tar Rag
    • Zipper Flap
      • Off Day
  • Minor Leagues
    • Minor Leagues
    • Bus Ride
    • Bus Ride Archive
    • From the Bus Stop
  • Other Originals
    • Original
    • Funk & Wagner
    • Hall of Fame
    • Headhunter
    • Monthly Awards
    • Road Trip
    • Separated At Birth
      • The Berkman Annex
  • Misc
    • Featured
    • Media
    • Uncategorized
  • Home
  • News
  • Game Recaps (Page 21)

Colorless Jose Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage

Posted on May 23, 2015 by BudGirl in Featured, Game Recaps

Detroit 1Q84
Astros some less

submitted by NeilT

I’m really excited about the long weekend. I plan to fish tomorrow if it doesn’t rain, and the long weekend at the start of the summer just feels luxurious like it’s never felt before. Maybe it’s because the Astros have played so well. Tonight I sat on the porch and drank the season’s first gin and tonic—I’d had the bottle of tonic water unopened in the frig since last summer. I smoked a cigar and drank a couple of gins and tonics made with the dried out lime I found in the crisper and read my book, Colorless Tsukuru Tazake and his Years of Pilgrimage, by Haruke Murakami. I’ve read two other novels by Murakami, Kafka on the Shore and 1Q84, and I liked them both. His novels live in a mundane world measured against the strange.

The game was on in the house and I was listening to the TV feed through the speakers on the patio. Since I didn’t have Comcast I’m late to the party, and I hate to admit how poor my baseball sensibilities are, but I don’t mind Ashby at all. If I’m sitting on the porch and just listening without watching, I can follow the game pretty well. And I find him and Blum funny, and him and Brownie fine. It’s heresy, I know, but there you are. I even like the banter with Julia. I’ll gladly give up my recap space if you want somebody with better taste.

Anyway, I managed about 40 pages of the novel during the game. Like I said, Murakami writes a strange novel. This one is about a guy who doesn’t appear to be anything special, hence the “colorless”. He’s very short, not more than 5’5” I’d guess, and he has a wonderful life at a very young age. His best friend is a bat named Lightning, and he does everything with that bat. His last year of high school he wins the school batting championship, ending the season with a .341 average. But then he goes home over a college break and calls the bat, just to hang out, you know? And the bat won’t talk to him. He pushes. He calls the bat every day and the bat won’t answer his calls. Finally the bat returns his call.

“Jose Tsukuru,” the bat says, “I can’t see you again.” “But why?” says Jose. “You know why,” says Lightning.

Of course Tsukuru has no clue, and neither does the reader. Why does a bat who has been your closest companion suddenly shun you? Tsukuru assumes it’s his own failing, and the reader wonders, what has Jose Tsukuru done to deserve his fate? Tonight Jose Tsukuru went 0 for 4, and his average slipped below .300.

The novel jumps around in time, and Tsukuru in the present is in his late 30s and an engineer who works on the design of railroad stations. You wouldn’t think there was much call for a designer of railroad stations, but this is Japan, not Texas, and for Japanese engineers railroad station work is probably as common as highway interchanges for Texas engineers. Tsukuru meets a girl, Homaruna, who he likes. They go out. They sleep together.

McHugh made one bad pitch, but when you’ve got a team batting .228, you can’t really afford a lot of mistakes. In the top of the third, the Stros had gone up by 2 after Valbuena reached on a Kinsler error, allowing Castro to score. Then Springer doubled driving in Valbuena. McHugh’s mistake was to some dude named J.D. Martinez. Where did this guy come from? Martinez: 3-run homer.

So back to the novel, Homeruna tells Tsukuru that she will be friends, but she will not sleep with Tsukuru again until he tells her the name of his bat, Lightning, so that she can find where Lightning is.

Poor Tsukuru! He has fallen in love with Homeruna, and she has deserted him! Springer has a great night, 2 for 4, but no Homeruna. Gattis goes 0 for 3 with one walk, Tucker 0 for 3, Rasmus, 0 for 3 with a golden sombrero, Carter 0 for 3 with 2 Ks. It was ugly. Ugly. In the book, Homeruna is a very attractive woman, but when she’s not there, it’s ugly. And really, what can Tsukuru do when the woman he desires won’t sleep with him?

Castro, by the way, went 2 for 3. Nice night for Castro. Nice night for Springer.

I’m about a quarter through the novel. I’ll follow it to the end (unless, of course, I’m shunned for being ok with Ashby), but I gots to tell ya: after tonight it’s one hard read. I hope Jose Tsukuru finds out why Lightning is shunning him. I hope Homeruna sleeps with the Astros again. But you know what? After the last three years, it’s hard to have much faith. I still expect that at the end of the night it will be 6-2.

Missed it by that much!

Posted on May 22, 2015 by Ron Brand in Featured, Game Recaps

Detroit 6
Houston 5

WP Wilson (1-0)
LP Sipp (2-1)

contributed by Mr. Happy

In many ways, this game was emblematic of the type of team the 2015 Astros are. Courtesy of pin-ball machine Scott Feldman (who pitched about as well as he could, bless his heart), the Astros dug themselves into a 5-0 deficit to David Price, who was cruising into the seventh frame with a shutout in the making. Things didn’t look good.

In years past, I’d have abandoned all hope and not even listened to the last three innings. But this team’s never-say-die philosophy keeps them in games. The Good Guys nicked three runs off of the stingy Mr. Price and drove him out of the ball game in the seventh inning. The Astros lead MLB in the number of runs scored from innings seven through nine. They added five to that total yesterday afternoon, tying the game up at 5 on rookie Preston Tucker’s ninth inning pinch home run off of shutdown closer Joakim Soria, who blew his first save opportunity in 14 chances.

Unfortunately, Tony Sipp got sloppy with an 0-2 pitch to the first hitter in the bottom of the eleventh inning, which Tigers rookie backstop James McCann belted over the wall in walkoff fashion to prevail 6-5 in 11 frames. Despite the loss, which dropped the Astros to 27-15, the club made its case with an exclamation point. The Astros come to play every day, and you better bring your A-game to the yard every day, or the Good Guys will clean your clock. I like that attitude.

Get ‘em tomorrow, boys. Until then, zitz ‘em and pound Budweiser.

Astros make magic numbers, win 6-4

Posted on May 20, 2015 by MusicMan in Game Recaps, News, Uncategorized

Astros 6, Athletics 4

W: Hernandez (2-3), L: Gray (4-2), S: Neshek (1)

HR: Muncy (2), Carter (7), Rasmus (8), Castro (5)

Box Score
Win Probability

Let’s go over the numbers, numbers that may be familiar to many of you by now. Going into Tuesday’s game, the Astros were:
23-0 when scoring at least four runs;
7-0 when tied or leading in the 7th;
17-2 when scoring first; and
17-0 when hitting more than one home run.

So if you look above, you’ll see much of what was needed to guarantee a home team victory.

The second inning was key, as Rasmus gunned down a lumbering Max Muncy on a Brett Lawrie DB, I mean 2b, and then Lawrie was himself cut down at the plate on a Fuld single.  That stellar defense backed up what was otherwise an impressive outing for Roberto Hernandez, who did a good job of keeping the ball down in the zone.

In the bottom of the frame, Rasmus led off with a ringing double, followed by Carter (slowly but surely finding his stroke) pounding one to the back of the Crawford Boxes for a 2-0 lead.  Those two hits moved the Astros’ win probability above 75%, where it would roughly hover while Hernandez allowed single runs in the third and sixth, sandwiched around the Astros barely cashing in on a bases loaded, nobody out situation in the fifth when Altuve made a horrible baselining decision, hesitating for several moments before dashing for the plate on a wild pitch, but way too late to beat the throw.

The 8th inning then provided the needed cushion as Rasmus and Castro went back-to-back to the right field bleachers, giving Gregerson a comfy 6-2 lead that he would try to hand back in the 9th.  Fortunately Neshek came on to get the final out, and the Astros had secured their best 40-game start in franchise history.

Anyone, Anyone, Bueller, Bueller

Posted on May 19, 2015 by BudGirl in Featured, Game Recaps

A’s 2, Astros 1
W: Mujica L: Thatcher S: Clippard

mlb recap
gamezone

Series Preview

I’ll admit it, I don’t have the energy to care to write a recap when the Astros lose. I just don’t but I push through it and write something anyway. I do not know if anyone reads the recaps, or if mine are just that lackluster compared to others, and I’m woman enough to admit, many of them are way better than mine. I try to be clever and witty but you know, maybe I am not. I think I can be clever in as-it-is-happening moments, but maybe it is all in my head. Just like I try to be clever and witty the Astros try to score runs. Sometimes it just doesn’t happen, like last night.

There are all kinds of discussions regarding whether this team is legit. It is true, they are legit. They are a real baseball team. I am still hesitant to believe they can hold this success up for a full season. It just seems like they go on a win streak and then a losing streak. I like the win streak aspect it is the losing streak aspect that scares the *&($ out of me.

I do not have the same faith in Khris Karter that some do. Would we have to wait almost half a season every season before he starts hitting? I do not know that I have ever seen a player make hitting a homerun so easy. Then again, when he swings and misses it cannot look any uglier.

Then there is Marisnick. Everyone was so excited he started out the season so great, well, now I worry that the wagon got to full and he can’t pull it anymore. I jumped off a while back because I figure anyone I specifically root for will not have the kind of success they should enjoy.

I did like seeing McMullers starting yesterday. I wish Hinch had let him finish the 5th inning. He’s a good looking kid. I was looking at him and was wondering what his dad looked like (because let me be honest, I’m not into May-December things). Well, I saw him on the television. He seems like a nice guy. Not sure where Lance gets his olive skin coloring from but it looks good on him.

Altuve has become the next “Biggio.” And make no mistake, I do not say that lightly. I honestly think he is the type of player they should all aspire to be. He works hard and is humble. Between those two things he is the ideal role model. I wish he spent more time in Houston but knowing how close he is to his family, I understand why he goes home in the off-season. He is a great story and I hope the story is just at the beginning for him.

I was thinking of going to Corpus Christi this upcoming weekend to go to a Hooks game. I did not realize when I started planning this trip that it is Memorial Day weekend. I do not really want to drive on a holiday weekend. Then Correa and McMullers get called up. There are still a lot of outstanding players to see but not sure I want to drive with a lot of other people on the roads. I do not trust other drivers.

I am planning to go to the game tomorrow, so if you are there, leave me a note here and maybe I will stop and say hi.

Astros win, reinforce my son’s faith in sports

Posted on May 17, 2015 by Waldo in Game Recaps

May 16, 2015

Astros 6, Blue Jays 5

W – Feldman (3-4)
L – Francis (1-2)
S – Gregerson (9)

Box Score | GameZone thread

Taking my six-year-old son Scott to an Astros game is a risky proposition due to his naturally fragile state of fandom at his age. In college, amidst five straight losses to OU and the Astros losing the 2004 NLCS and 2005 World Series, I figured out how to enjoy the good things in sports without allowing the bad things to get me down or angry. I’m trying to pass that on to my kids since I want them to be sports fans but don’t want them to be overly pessimistic or, worse, remote-control-throwing hotheads.

It hasn’t quite sunk in yet, though. Saturday night’s game against the Blue Jays was a rollercoaster of emotion, showcasing the highest peaks and lowest valleys of the psyche of a young sports fan (this is the kid that wept face down into the couch when Texas was bounced from the College World Series last year). The kinds of things he was saying during the game also proved to be a good barometer of the game’s events.

Before the game: “The Astros have 23 wins. They’ll definitely be the champions.” (I have tried desperately to temper these expectations.)

Scott Feldman strikes out Devon Travis to open the game: “A strikeout ALREADY?! Now I KNOW they’ll be the champions!”

The Blue Jays score three runs with their next four hitters: “Oh no! Now they can’t be the champions…”

The Astros strand two runners in the bottom of the 1st: “Everything is ruined!!!”

The Astros strand another in the 2nd: “Daddy!!! When is the 0 next to ‘HOU’ going to change to a 4?? The Astros won’t win unless it changes to a 4!”

Evan Gattis hits a two-run homer in the bottom of the third: “It changed to a 2!!  That’s not enough to win but everything isn’t ruined anymore!!”

Chris Carter goes yard in the bottom of the 6th to take a 5-3 lead: “They’re going to be the champions again!!”

Marwin Gonzalez goes yard two hitters later: “What if the 6 next to ‘HOU’ changed to a 25? Then they would just stop playing because they’d be the champions forever.”

Heading into the top of the 9th: “They need to open the roof so that everybody downtown can hear how happy we are.”

With a runner on, Luke Gregerson has the Jays down to their last strike: “The Astros are going to win, no matter what.” (I tried desperately to temper these expectations as well.”

Edwin Encarnacion launches a massive train track two-run homer that splits the lighting supports in left center: “Don’t worry, Daddy. The Astros will still win. NO. MATTER. WHAT.”

Hey, maybe the kid is learning after all.

Collin McHugh (4-1, 3.50) goes for the four-game sweep against Mark Buehrle (5-2, 5.54) on Sunday at 1:10pm CDT.

Jade Helm 15

Posted on May 16, 2015 by Ron Brand in Featured, Game Recaps

Houston’s Astros 8
The Canadien’s Provocateurs 4

contributed by NeilT

Handsomely rugged Texas Ranger Captain Burk Lanceman sat in the secret headquarters of Texas government located deep beneath the Capitol in Austin. Across from him sat the leader of the Lone Star State, Governor General Greg Abbott.

“Are you certain, Captain, certain? Can there really be no doubt?”

Ruggedly handsome Captain Lanceman’s response was deliberate, measured. “There can be no doubt, Governor General. We have tracked transmissions from Toronto to closed WalMarts in Livingston and Midland. The transmissions originate in Ottawa. The Canadian’s plan, known as Jade Helm 15, appears to be for a two-prong attack producing an east-west pincer movement focused on the Capitol.

“Governor, there is no doubt that the internal events at the two closed WalMarts holds the key to the end game of the Canadian’s Jade Helm operations. Jade Helm and WalMart are inextricably linked, and the existing evidence suggests two end game probabilities. After serving as the staging area, the WalMart stores will be processing centers for FEMA camp political prisoners, including the leaders of our Texas government, and will continue on an on-going basis as supply and staging centers for continued mopping-up operations.

“In the past four weeks, I have watched over 100 videos on Jade Helm and Walmart. I have performed what researchers call a qualitative, or a descriptive analysis of the available facts. In performing this task, I have looked for patterns among the recent Walmart closings, because it is clear that the closings coincide with Jade Helm. This constitutes Phase One of the analysis. In Phase Two, the findings from Phase One are correlated to known or strongly suspected events connected to Jade Helm and other areas of concern related to State security. Subsequently, this kind of descriptive analysis can yield strong clues as to the true intent of where Jade Helm is headed and what the WalMart role consists of in conjunction with Jade Helm. There is no doubt that the events are inextricably linked, and that the mastermind behind them is the Canadian.”

“But Captain Lanceman, what can we do!” Governor General Abbott was clearly disturbed.

“We believe that the creation and maintenance of a covert and preplanned covert guerrilla warfare secret undercover force to be secretly and covertly pre-positioned in an area that will then likely be overrun by the invading Canadian forces. Think Viet Cong, only from Quebec. The Canadian’s plan is to “Master the Human Domain” by insertion of stealth forces based upon the use of “infiltration techniques.” The first two purposes of Jade Helm are dissident extraction and martial law to carry out the geographic isolation of troubled areas. The third goal is the popularization of ice hockey.

“Governor General, you must activate Texas’s greatest hope. I have brought you a letter to warn the Texas Brigade.”

Governor General Abbott was clearly astonished. “But Captain Lanceman, the Texas Brigade has not been activated since 1865!”

“Yes Governor General, but they, our greatest patriots, stand ready for this purpose.” Handsomely rugged Captain Lanceman passed the letter to Governor General Abbott.

“To address concerns of Texas citizens and to ensure that Texas communities remain safe, secure and informed about military procedures occurring in their vicinity, I am directing the Texas State Guard to monitor Operation Jade Helm 15. During the training operation, it is important that Texans know their safety, constitutional rights, private property rights and civil liberties will not be infringed.”

***
“Sacre bleu!” cried Senator Cruse, code name the Canadian. “Burk Lanceman has taken the bait! Jean Jacques,” he called to his chief of staff, “bring me tonight’s play-by-play!”

For years the Canadians, plotting against the government in Texas, had raised a super-race of baseball players whose sole purpose was to communicate to inserted Canadian agents the coded plans and schemes of the Canadians. These baseball players, all now on the Toronto Blue Jays, were raised by the Canadian Royal Mounties from birth to play baseball as it had never been played before. No action on the field was random: all was controlled, designed, and communicating play-by-play Toronto’s coded messages.

“Look Jean Jacques, how our brave Canadiens make Keuchel struggle. Four earned runs in only six innings pitched! They are telling us that the Texas government is buying our fake invasion plans!

“And now look, how they allow the bullpen to shut them down! Mon dieu! They are affirming to us that there is no real invasion! Harris, Qualls (yes even Qualls), and Fields! in the 7th, 8th, and 9th are telling us there is no real invasion.

“Now look, here, with home runs by Springer, off Dickey in the 3rd, Altuve (3 RBI) off Dickey in the 5th, with 422 feet, and Valbuena, off Tepera in the 7th! And the two doubles by Tucker off Dickey and the one by Carter in the 2nd! Jean Jacques! They are letting us know that by sending out his letter, the Texans will not be ready when it is time for the real invasion! We have at last destroyed the credibility of our nemesis, Captain Burk Lanceman!”

It had been a brilliant game by the agent provocateurs of the Canadian government. Except for troubled innings by Keuchel, the game had been arranged so that the Texans believed that they were in control, and that things had been played out well. Little did they know that the real invasion, the Canadian invasion, was coming. And the only Texan who could stop it, handsomely rugged Captain Burk Lanceman, had lost his credibility on a Canadian ruse.

«‹1920212223›»

Meta

  • Log in
  • Entries feed
  • Comments feed
  • WordPress.org

Copyright © 2002-2015 OrangeWhoopass.com