Thursday, April 29, 2010
Snakes 1
Astros 0
W: Kennedy (2-1) | L: Oswalt (2-4) | S: Qualls (6)
What a pile of suck that was. Justin Upton hit one big-ass solo tater, and that was it for the scoring in this turd. The offense continues to find new and exciting depths of ineptitude, netting the second 8-game skid of the young season. By far the best thing that happened in this game was Feliz and Q teaming up to pick Chris Young off of third, so here’s that.
Also…
D-backs 9, Astros 1
W: Cesar Valdez, L: Felipe Paulino
This team is getting harder to watch. I sit at the game, at home, or in a bar and just want to do something that will help them get from worst to bad. I have low expectations of this team. I understand they are not the most talented, but at times they are just hard to watch.
My main ray of sunshine on this team is Michael Bourn. Most of you know he’s my favorite player. I worry that whatever is effecting Berkman, Lee and Pence will eventually contaminate him.
I want so badly for Bud Norris and Felipe Paulino to use this season to become better pitchers. I still have hope for them.
The level of frustration I am currently feeling is mind-boggling. I have not figured out why I get this frustrated when I know this team is bad. But seriously, 1 run scored in each of the last 3 games? It is enough to make me start using unladylike words.
So, while I have no expectations of this team being a good/great team, I have expectations of them just being bad not the worst. In the 2004 season, I started watching Major League almost every day. The days I did not watch it, the Astros lost. I’m going to figure out what I can do to help make my team bad. You should try it too.
Things you should read are the GameZone and Taras Series Preview.
Astros at Braves, 5/2/2010
Braves 7, Astros 1
W: Lowe (4-2) L: Norris (1-3)
U-G-L-Y. That’s all you can say about this one.
The only highlight of the game was a bizarro-world DP in which Berkman intentionally dropped a bunt with runners on 1st and 2nd, got the force at 2b, and then a tag of the runner going to 3b. Even more bizzare was that DoRay and Berkman all knew that the infield fly rule is not in play on a bunt attempt. Just your typical 3-6-5 DP.
Of course, this was after the Braves had already scored 3 in the frame, making it 4-0 and putting the game out of reach. The Braves made Norris pay when he was wild, plating 3 of their 4 walks. Norris continued to get little in the way of defensive help, as opposing teams continue to show that you can go 1st to 3rd on the Astros at will. Bourn did make a nice diving stab in CF to start the 5th to keep the damage to 7 runs instead of 8, and Fulchino and Lyon looked good in relief.
Emphemera, tidbits, and things just to keep me interested in yet another blowout:
– the Astros have been outscored 37 to 12 in the last 6 games;
– the Atlanta organist played “Bo(u)rn to Run”, which I think passes for high wit in the world of at-bat music;
– Jeff Keppinger and Michael Bourn lead the team in slugging, coming in at 59th and 62nd, respectively, in the NL among qualifying hitters;
– Gas Can came in just to stay sharp, which will happen when you sweep a crappier opponent as you come off a 9-game losing streak;
– Gas Can has apparently finished puberty, as he is now sporting a full beard in celebration of his announced retirement.
Astros come home to face the Diamondbacks, last seen getting swept by the Cubs.
ohnowesuckagainAstros 1, Braves 10
Contributed by 94CougarGrad
WP: Hudson (2-1)
LP: Rodriguez (1-3)
After yesterday’s abysmal loss to the Braves- who, before playing the Astros, had been on a 1-9 skid and have now won 2 in a row- Brad Mills talked to his team. While what gets said in the clubhouse stays in the clubhouse, let’s hope it was enough to remind the team that they do, in fact, know how to play baseball.
Wandy struggled, serving up 5 runs- three unearned- on ten hits and a walk. But although it sure as Hell didn’t help, what did the Astros in wasn’t necessarily the pitching. When you combine a lackluster offensive effort and a horrible defensive effort, you get an embarrassing loss. The Braves’ 2 runs in the third inning were enough to secure the win, but the icing on the cake came in the 5th inning. Mills summed it up afterwards: “We gave them six outs there in the fifth inning, which is awful tough.” I’ll admit, I didn’t see the game, but the Comical’s description of the inning made the Astros sound worse than the Keystone Cops.
There ain’t much else to say, folks. It was worse than bad. The final game of the series is today at 12:35. Let’s hope that whatever it was that Mills said to the team after the game was enough to encourage some kind of effort out of the Astros.
Astros 2, Braves 4
W: Tommy Hanson, L: Brett Myers, S: Billy Wagner
Well, this was a pretty fast losing effort for the Astros. There were a few highlights for the Astros on the night. JR Towles caught two, yes 2, Braves stealing bases. Hunter Pence stole what would be Heyward’s second HR on the night. Brett Meyers went 7 innings giving up 3 ER.
Lowlights for the Astros are many, as seems the usual now. Tommy Manzella had a tough night in the field. Two, yes 2, errors on consecutive plays. One bounced and hit him in the throat. Looked like it hurt. Michael Bourn looks like he may start joining the hitting habits of the middle of the lineup guys. 8 strike outs in his last 13 plate appearances. At this point in the season, he seems like the favorite for the Astros All-Star representative, but his skid, if it continues, might hurt his chances.
Former Astros pitcher, Billy Wagner got the save on the night. I was hoping he’d throw a perfect pitch and give the Astros a chance to win the game.
They Astros are not going to win many games with only 4 hits, ONE WALK and 1 HBP. I do not think having Lance Berkman in the lineup would have made much of a difference. The Astros lose with him in the lineup also. I hope Brad Mills finds some magic beans for the boys to eat so they can win some more games. I hope May treats them better.
For more information on the game, check out the gamezone.
If you want to know about the series against the Braves, read Mark’s preview.
It is also time to vote for your favorite Astro to attend the All Star Game.
Favorite JDism of the night: “Ugly finder with attitude” in regard to a foul ball.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Dickities 4
Astros 2
W: Arroyo (1-2) | L: Oswalt (2-3) | S: Cordero (8)
Sounds hard.
Ah, the familiar sweep. It’s been a little while, but that brings the Good Guys up to three of them in April. Let’s ‘cap this using the sorry crutch of the unmotivated – BULLET POINTS!
Random: So, the missus has been bugging me for seemingly eternity to watch the second Twilight movie with her. I really have no idea why. Since I’ve been monopolizing the TV – and because I was assured that there would be reciprocation – I decided to be the nice guy and agree to watch this insipid piece of shit immediately following the game. And because I’m working on being a better human being, I even agreed to not point out what an insipid piece of shit it is during the movie.
As such, I have now ground my teeth down to painful little nubs, and I’m left to tell all three of you just how badly Twilight sucks, or this rage will consume me. Seriously, that was the worst clusterfucktastrophe of shit story, shit characters, shit dialog, shit acting and shit effects that I have ever suffered through, bar none. And yes, I’ve seen Waterworld. I mean, I knew it was going to be bad, but I had absolutely no idea that it was even possible to be that bad.
Someone who has read the books please give me some good news and tell me that they all die horribly by the end of it. And I mean all of them, because I couldn’t find a single redeeming character, or even someone didn’t make me feel all punchy and stabby. (Maybe the Dad, but even he should just be put out of his misery.) If it’s not the case that they’re all dispatched by some sort of fantastic emo-fey-monster-infecting virus, can you please, please just tell me that an asteroid falls out of the sky and lands on Bella? BECAUSE I HATE HER SO FUCKING MUCH. Lie to me if necessary, Thanks.
So yeah… Braves next. Go get’ em.
