Kansas City 2, Houston 0

W: Crow (2-1)
L: Ambriz (1-3)

The bright sunlight revealed much more than just a game today. I don’t know if both teams took some extra turns at the bar last night, but this was a sluggish, phoned-in affair from the start. Wild early, Harrell threw 51 pitches in the first two innings before making a correction and shutting down the weak Royals offense through seven.

Across the way, 2011 PCL Pitcher Of The Year Luis Mendoza was far more than the feeble Astro bats could deal with, mustering four hits and a walk in seven innings. Houston did actually get runners on, which is more than the Royals did after the second, but the customary 0 for 7 with runners in scoring position tells you what you need to know about how brutal this team is at the plate.

A casual observer might earmark a special place in Hell for Chris Carter’s ineffectiveness with the bat – a .220 average and 90 strikeouts in 61 games – but there’s oh so much more damnation to go around.

90 strikeouts in 205 at-bats, by the way, extrapolates to 239 whiffs in 544 AB over 162 games. I guess I’m going to have to go back to my sabermetrics library and find out why strikeouts are such a lovable little out or it’s stroke time, baby, and I don’t mean that in a good way.

Harrell had needed only 48 pitches for the last five innings, but Porter declined to send him out for the eighth even though he was clearly cruising. “I wasn’t going to send him back out there and put him in position to get the loss,” Porter said. “You send him back out there, now he’s at 115 or 116 pitches with men on base. Now, you’re going to bring somebody else into the game and he’s in position to get a loss. He did a great job. It’s a positive start for him and we got him out of the game on a good note.”

So now we are coddling the delicate psyches of millionaires, expecting them to fail and spending more effort in making sure they get a little Happy Time every fifth day instead of getting them to do their goddamn job like the rest of us? What the fuck, Porter? Take out a tough gamer in the middle of a great stretch because you expect him to fail in order to bring in someone, anyone from the bullpen who is nearly guaranteed to blow up?

Cue the entrance of The Immolator. Ambriz pops in and throws the flaming rag onto the pile of tinder. Getz singles and easily steals second. With two lefthanders following and Porter unconcerned about Ambriz’ sense of failure, he doesn’t walk Gordon, doesn’t bring in a lefty – no, he lets The Immolator give up another single to center.

Getz then scores the only run necessary for KC on a horrific throw by Crowe, who not only ignores the cutoff man and the trailing runner moving into scoring position but he also flies the throw so far up the 1B line that Salvy Perez’ grandma could’ve chugged home for the winner.

Carter was also responsible for the most glaring example of lackadaisical play, allowing Hosmer to advance from first to third on Perez’ single to left when he failed to hustle or recognize what was happening right in front of him.

This was a frustrating loss, after Harrell had pitched well enough to win. Porter succeeded in keeping Harrell out of the losing column, but taking a position with a lower expectation of success than the status quo in order to let players feel some sense of accomplishment instead of failure is a doomed strategy, at least when it comes to this bullpen. All it tells me is that he doesn’t have the confidence necessary to keep players playing, and that he’s sold out to shuffling the deck, chasing short-term successes in some kind of statistical circle jerk. Maybe Porter is the guy for a team of chumps and kids, but this doesn’t give me any confidence at all that he’ll be the right manager for a team with real talent.

Royals 7 Astros 2

contributed by Mr. Happy

Erik Bedard toed the slab tonight for the Good Guys, and he had two problems that plagued his performance and that collared him with his third loss. Bedard either couldn’t throw a strike, walking three in 4.2 frames, or he caught too much of the plate, where, when he found the plate, the Royals popped three two-baggers off of him. Frankly, I’ve seen enough of Bedard. His value is as a long reliever and place holder until Cosart is ready, which I hope and pray is very soon.

The Royals jumped on the Astros in the bottom of the first inning, scoring two runs, which by themselves were almost enough for the efficient and stingy Ervin Santana, who allowed two runs on five hits in seven innings of work, striking out six and walking none, tossing 96 pitches. In what was a case of too much too little too late, Chris Carter’s home run, his 13th, in the seventh inning off of Santana was the only real Astros offensive highlight. The other good notes on the game included yet another hit for scrappy Brandon Barnes, whose BA is .292, and Brad Peacock tossing 3.1 innings of two hit one run baseball.

The Royals go for the broom tomorrow afternoon against Lucas Harrell.

My first week of work here in Toledo went very well. The campus folks are delightful, and the campus is beautiful. I move into my apartment this week. I’ve been camping out at some upscale student housing. You should see how nice this place is. Granite kitchen tops. Full kitchen, with microwave and dishwasher. Washer and dryer. It’s not anything remotely similar to what I lived in at college. Kids should be beating down the doors to live here. LSU continues its Super-Regional series against Oklahoma, besting the Sooners and Jonathan Gray last night 2-0. Geaux Tigers!!!

contributed by NeilT

Most of you have heard how her mean neighbor, Grocer McLane, wanted to put down Astroleena’s little mascot, Orbit. As she clutched Orbit to her breast and fled the Harris County Domed Stadium, she heard her Auntie Emmet call, “Astroleena, no! Hunker down! The Domed Stadium’s coming down in the next cyclone!” And of course the cyclone came a-twisting and carried Astroleena, little green Orbit, and the Domed Stadium away to a strange, strange place.

As she awoke, Astroleena found herself surrounded by small, wee second basemen. “We’re the Altuves,” they said in unison, “except for that guy over there in the Vandy jersey. You’ve killed her! Or at least your Domed Stadium did!” And sure enough, poking out from beneath the Domed Stadium were two hideously disfigured bird feet wearing a pair of sparkly orange cleats.

“What! No! I haven’t killed anyone.”

Suddenly the hideous bird feet melted away. “Ding dong” sang the Altuves in unison, “the Wicked Witch of the East ain’t dead. You seem to have let her get away with the series. But look! She left her sparkly orange cleats! At least you got something.”

And then Astroleena’s gaze followed the Altuve’s eyes upward as a beautiful woman in a tight besequined gown floated down from heaven.

“Hooray!” cried the Altuves, “it’s the Good Fairy Lola!”

She was a fine-looking woman, though with an oddly husky voice. “You must be a very powerful witch, to have played the Orioles such a good series.”

“I’m not a witch at all, I’m only a little girl, Astroleena from Houston. Where am I?”

“You’re in the marvelous Land of Bud, also known as the American League.”

“But I want to go home to Houston.”

The good fairy pondered. “I can’t help you, but perhaps the great and powerful Wizard of Bud can. You must follow the chalk lines to the Brewery City and ask the great and powerful Wizard. And put on those sparkly orange cleats, I think you’ll find them very stylish.”

As Astroleena laced up the cleats she gazed at her little mascot Orbit. “Orbit,” sighed Astroleena, “I think we’re in Kansas.”

***
Royals 4
Astros 2

Lyles went 7 innings, giving up 6 hits and two earned runs, off a Perez HR in the 4th. It was another excellent performance by a starter, though maybe a bit wild. He threw 100 pitches and only 61 strikes. Only one walk though.

Wright pitched to one batter in the 8th, Hosmer, who singled. Fields came in for Wright and Hosmer scored the go-ahead run on a Butler double. Johnson then scored on a Lough double. It was plenty enough.

The bats were not particularly effective against Shields, who went 7. There was not, as the saying goes, just enough offense. In the 1st, 2nd, and 4th runners were stranded at 3rd. I hate that. Barnes scored on a Crowe triple in the top of the third. Gonzalez scored on a Castro double in the 7th. The next 7 Astros lined up to go down, so to speak.

Today is another day.

Astros win slug-fest with Orioles 11-7

WP: Keuchel (3-2)
LP: Garcia (2-3)

Attendance: 15,526

contributed by Sphinx Drummond

The Astros hit six home runs on Wednesday, raising their won-loss record for Wednesdays to an awesome 7 wins against 3 losses. Last week I considered the possibility that the Norse god Wodan represented the Asgardian community as one of the baseball gods. I thought that because the Astros play so well on Wednesdays or Wodan’s day, that he must favor them some how. After reading a discussion over in the talk zone about jinxing no-hitters, I realize now that the Astros playing well on Wednesdays has nothing to do with any baseball god or gods. I have no explanation for the Astros’ Wednesday performances. I guess it’s just magic.

Jason Castro, Carlos Pena and J. D. Martinez each belted two-run homers, and Jose Altuve, Matt Dominguez and Marwin Gonzalez knocked solo shots, for a total of six on the night. The Astros came one home run shy of a single-game franchise record for home runs.

Dallas Keuchel pitched well enough to earn his third win of the season. Clemens and Blackley did their best to allow the Orioles back in the game. Hector Ambriz, after allowing a run scoring single, cleaned up Blackley’s mess by coaxing a double play ball to end the eighth inning. And Jose Veras closed out the 9th in a non-save situation.

This season has more four game series than I remember in the past. I guess there’s a reason for that. Thursday the Astros try to take another series in a businessman’s special that has Bud Norris going against Miguel Gonzalez

Orioles 4, Astros 1

Contributed by Reuben

I don’t know if they were “hammered into submission,” but the Astros did lose Tuesday night, ending their 6-game winning streak. I listened to an inning or two, but my focus this night was not really on the game.

Two years ago, on this date – 6/4/11 – the Astros and Wandy Rodriguez were beaten by the Padres, giving them a 23-36 record. (Incidentally, none of the Astros who appeared in the game are on the 25-man roster today.) I definitely didn’t watch that game. My wife and I were busy having our wedding.

One year ago, on June 4, my wife and I were driving to dinner to celebrate our one-year anniversary. When we got there, my dad had texted me, as I hoped he would. “Astros select SS Carlos Correa;” the MLB draft had started during our 25-minute drive. One year later, Correa, who has cooled off a bit in the past week, is nonetheless hitting .275/.383/.401 with 33 RBI in 43 games, not bad for an 18 year-old in A-ball.

Ten years ago, on June 4, the Astros also hosted the Orioles. In that game, Brian Roberts played 2B and hit leadoff for the Orioles. Geoff Blum played 3B and hit 2nd for the Astros. Ten years later, they are both getting paychecks from the same teams. The Astros won, 6-4, as Jose Vizcaino homered and Wade Miller outdueled Pat Hentgen before turning the ball over to Brad Lidge and Billy Wagner.

Yesterday, we went on a hike to celebrate our two-year anniversary. We’ve been on several hikes here in the Catskills, but I’d have to say none of them can beat the view from the top of this one. One of those times that really shakes you out of the daily routine a bit and makes you reflect on things and feel good about living. Not that this photo does it justice, but here it is:

And, since this is ostensibly a write-up about the Astros game, here’s a couple cool photos I found from that as well: