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  • Articles posted by Andyzipp (Page 2)

Sic Transit Gloria. Glory Fades. I’m Mike Hampton

Posted on July 7, 2009 by Andyzipp in Game Recaps, News

Astros 4, Pirates 1

W – Michael William Hampton (5-5, 4.16)

L – Virgil Matthew Vasquez (1-2, 4.50)

SV – Jose Rafael Valverde (7, 3.86)

Attendance – A far sight less than the 26,834 tickets sold for this clash of the titans…

Astros.com Recap (Grodsky?)

Pirates.com Recap (Jenifer Langosch…Do your self a favor and don’t GIS her.)

Before the Game:

In honor of the Pirates coming to town, I made a big plate of haluski and heated up some pierogies.  If I could have found Yuengling, that would have been the trifecta.  But when faced with the option of Steel City Reserve or Shiner Black, Texas won.  Just like in the eventual, inevitable war of secession.  And also the game.

Prior to the game, Pirates manager John Russell had a closed door meeting with his team.  He reportedly told them, “Here’s my advice to you: Take dead aim on the rich boys. Get them in the crosshairs and take them down. Just remember, they can buy anything but they can’t buy backbone. Don’t let them forget it. Thank you.”

Game Recap:

There’s a lot being made of Mike Hampton winning 10 straight decisions against the Pittsburgh Pirates, 4 of them coming this season.  It’s sort of being glossed over that prior to the 2009 season he hadn’t faced them since 2004.  So Mike Hampton beat the Pirates again?  Oh that’s great. I wrote a hit play and directed it, so I’m not sweating it either.

Hampton wasn’t exactly sharp, but he didn’t really have to be to beat the last place Pirates.  Hampton allowed only six base runners in his seven innings, nibbled a bunch and took advantage of an alert defense behind him.  If only he could figure out how to do that against any team not from Pittsburgh.  On the other hand, he’s left-handed, so I assume he’ll be on someone’s 15-day D.L. for several more years, regardless of actual results.

By the way, I’m almost 38.  I don’t suffer from any sort of memory imparement that I’m aware of, but do you remember the Pirates being good?  Was Omar Moreno on the team then?

At the plate, the Astros got to Virgil Vasquez early, with Geoff Blum doing the damage in the bottom of the first with a 2-out, 2-run triple, plating Lance Berkman and Miguel Tejada .  Mostly to show how poorly Garrett Jones tracks baseballs hit, well, anywhere, the play was sent to New York for further review.  Or CB Bucknor needed a Dove Bar break.  One of those.

Miguel Tejada doubled in the other RBIs in this game in the fifth, scoring Hampton and Michael Bourn.

Outside of the totally necessary replay review in the bottom of the first, the only real drama in the game was in the eight inning, when set-up man LaTroy Hawkins gave Humberto Quintero what amounted to gas face.  Quintero approched the mound after Hawkins grimaced after a pitch…

Quintero: Your mind is as warped as your face, LaTroy

Hawkins:  Don’t get nasty, brother.

Quintero signaled for Rex Jones’ mustache to come out.  Rex came, too.  Quintero inquired, “Are you fond of that moustache?”

By this point, someone had jostled Cecil Cooper from his in-game coma, so he trotted out to the mound…

Hawkins: The truth is, neither one of us has the slightest idea where this relationship is going. We can’t predict the future.

Cooper: We don’t have a relationship.

Hawkins: But we’re friends.

Cooper: Yes, and that’s all we’re *going* to be. Well, yes…

Hawkins: That’s all I meant by “relationship.” You want me to grab a dictionary?

After which, a bewildered Cooper returned to his restful slumber and Hawkins closed out the inning.

After the Game:

Oswalt: What’s the secret, Mike?

Hampton: The secret?

Oswalt: Yeah, you seem to have it pretty figured out.

Hampton: The secret, I don’t know… I guess you’ve just gotta find something you love to do and then… do it for the rest of your life. For me, it’s elementary school teachers.

Coming up:

Maholm versus Moehler.  Baseball fever.  Catch it.

Weekly Strike with Wes Wright

Posted on June 25, 2009 by Andyzipp in Media, Videos

Our friends at 1560 The Game sat down with Astros reliever Wes Wright to talk baseball, punching Perez Hilton and fashion?

Neither a Buyer Nor a Also-Ran Be…

Posted on June 23, 2009 by Andyzipp in Columnistas, Featured, Off Day No Comments

off-day-largeThere are no great teams in Major League Baseball. Sure, the Dodgers and Red Sox appear to be running away with the the National League West and the American League East, respectively. And certainly, there are T-ball teams with a better chance of making the playoffs than the Washington Nationals. But other than the six division leaders, there are 23 additional teams within 10 games of being in the playoffs. So that’s 29 out of 30 teams with a shot at the playoffs. Twenty-three of those teams are at worst 5 games below .500. Everyone is “in”, at least on June 23rd. In theory, it should make for great baseball, with every team feeling like they are in it each and every game. So the season should be chock full of moments like this past weekend when eleven games were won in the last at-bat.

Instead, you have one horrid team, 2 pretty good teams (and based on the level of competition, who knows how good they actually are), and 27 other teams all kind of lumped together playing mediocre, inconsistent baseball. Since mediocre and inconsistent should be in the logo for this year’s Astros team (now taking the field, Your Inconsistent Houston Mediocre Astros), they fit right in. And while realistically, most of the 27 are going to fall by the wayside over the next couple of months, the wild-card format allows for the opportunity for a 2007 Rockies (or 2005 Astros) type team to catch fire and ride it all the way to the World Series. So, right now, if you’re not the Nationals (or Diamondbacks, Royals or Indians) you probably consider yourself a “buyer”. Which is why it’s the perfect time for the Astros to become “sellers”.

The Astros have several free agents to consider after this season, none of whom are likely to back. Just operating off of memory here…Miguel Tejada, Jose Valverde, LaTroy Hawkins, Tim Byrdak, Pudge Rodriguez, Brandon Backe, Russ Ortiz and Mike Hampton are all free agents to be. Maybe Jason Michaels, Geoff Blum, and Darrin Erstad, too. They also have options on Doug Brocail (club) and Brian Moehler (mutual) to consider. On the current 25-man roster, you figure that Lance Berkman, Roy Oswalt, Carlos Lee, Hunter Pence, Wandy Rodriguez, Chris Sampson, Wesley Wright and Michael Bourn will almost certainly be back next year. Kaz Matsui too, but only because he is almost completely un-tradeable (and unlove-ed). By my count, that’s sixteen open positions on the 2010 team. Six. Teen. From this year’s roster, the Astros will still have Alberto Arias, Jeff Fulchino, Felipe Paulino, Humberto Quintero, Edwin Maysonet and Jeff Keppinger though some form of club control/arb-eligible blah blah blah stuff that smarter people than me can explain to you.

If the Astros had to open the 2010 season today, not only would their calendars be completely worthless, but it’s hard to say they could field a team. The infield would have Berkman at first, some combination of Matsui and Maysonet at second and big nasty question marks at third, short and catcher. The starting outfield, one of the most productive in baseball this year, comes back intact with Lee, Bourn and Pence, but right now there isn’t a fourth outfielder, not to mention a fifth outfielder, but the Astros aren’t carrying one of those right now anyway. The bench likely includes Keppinger, Quintero and whichever of Matsunet isn’t playing. The pitching looks to get a lot thinner (if you can imagine that) with Oswalt and Wandy at the top and three days of praying for rain. Right now, only Paulino has any major league experience as a starter, so I guess add him there. The bullpen would “feature” Wright, Sampson, Fulchino and Arias, but there’s no closer and no established set up man.

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The organization doesn’t have a major league ready catcher (sorry Mr. Towles) and will need to answer internal questions at short (Tommy Manzella, maybe), third (ditto on Chris Johnson), in the outfield (Brian Bogusevic or Yordanny Ramirez) and on the mound. Is anyone out of a group that includes Bud Norris, Yorman Bazardo, and Polin Trinidad ready to be a major league starter? Is there a closer in the wind somewhere?

While the front office of your local nine is currently saying the right things about building this team, you have to wonder if they mean it when they’re 4 games out of a playoff spot. Are they content to get a slew of supplemental picks for letting guys leave at the end of the season? Are they really willing to part with a Miguel Tejada or Jose Valverde for the right deal? It’s pie in the sky, but if you could pry away a Clay Buchholz (or rather THE actual Clay Buchholz) from a contender who might need some offense as well as someone who could stand in the shortstop position play shortstop, how much would that hasten the rebuilding? If you could get Brandon Wood from the Angels for one of the top closers in baseball for their stretch run, would that help? If it makes it go smoother, the Astros could probably still part with Tejada and Valverde and stay just as much in contention as they are right now. Tell Drayton that, Mr. Wade.

This is the last gasp for the post-Bagwell/Biggio Astros (the Berkman/Oswalt Astros doesn’t sound as good), and while they could still make a run (and they probably will) the organization has to take the opportunity to look forward and be bold. Go on, forget about raging against the dying of the light and be “sellers”.

Everything Old Is New Again

History recycles. It’s green as hell in that patterns repeat, if you want to see them. I’ve struggled to come to terms with why this year’s Astros team isn’t all that interesting to me. I mean I watch the games, I read the articles and quotes, I even, from time to time actually discuss baseball (kinda) on various (one) media outlets. It hit me (conveniently in time to do another column) that I’ve seen this team before. Only then they were called the 1990 Houston Astros.

The 1990 team was, as most in the history of the Houston franchise to that point, a dog of a team, but they didn’t know it going to the season. The opening day roster featured Houston favorites, including Gerald Young, Craig Biggio, Billy Doran, Glenn Davis, and Ken Caminiti. Mike Scott was joined in the rotation by Jim Deshaies, Danny Darwin and Mark Portugal. The bullpen was led by closer Dave Smith, Larry Andersen, Juan Agosto and Charlie Kerfeld.

They had reason to believe that 1990 might be a pretty good season, by Houston standards anyway. Led by second year manager, Art Howe, the Astros were coming off a rebound 86-76 1989 campaign. Scott and Deshaies had combined for 35 wins. Davis and Doran were the stars and the motor for the team, offensively. Biggio, Caminiti, Portugal and Eric Yelding were exciting young players to watch. Plus the much anticipated Eric Anthony was going to take over in right field. It looked like Houston had a good mix of youth and experience and were poised to make a move.

They proceeded to completely fall apart. By Memorial Day, 1990, Houston was 14 games behind Cincinnati. It proceeded to get worse from there. Scott battled injuries. Deshaies had a bad season. Bill Gullickson got 32 starts. Davis played in only 93 games and was replaced by Franklin Stubbs at first. Gerald Young, Dave Smith, Alex Trevino, Charley Kerfeld, Juan Agosto, and Jim Clancy (thank god) were let go. Caminiti and Yelding regressed. Eric Anthony was Eric Anthony. Glenn Wilson retired to his gas station in Humble (or wherever). Doran was traded to the Reds for Terry McGriff, amongst others. And Larry Andersen was traded to the Boston Red Sox for some skinny AA third baseman who was buried in their organization. Houston finished the 1990 season in 4th place in the National League West, at 75-87, 16 games back.

All told, sixteen players who opened the 1990 season with the Astros were elsewhere by April 8th, 1991. It was as complete a flush of a sports organization as has ever been seen in Houston, and predictably, the Astros finished even worse in 1991 at 65-97. However, Jeff Bagwell, Steve Finley, Pete Harnisch, Kenny Lofton, Curt Schilling, Scott Servais and Tony Eusebio all made their Houston debuts. Luis Gonzalez, Andujar Cedeno, and Darryl Kile and Caminiti played their first really meaningful stretches with the Astros.

The moves in 1990 and 1991 were the foundation for an 15-year stretch that saw your Houston Astros go 1272-1093 (.538) with 6 playoff appearances and a National League Pennant. From 1994 to 2006, the Astros either first or second in their division 12 of those 13 seasons. It’s the greatest stretch in Astros history, by any measure. It changed the perception of the Houston franchise throughout baseball.

It feels like there’s a similar opportunity, just 19 years later.

Headhunter: VIII – Pony Tail

Posted on June 18, 2009 by Andyzipp in Headhunter, Media, Videos

No.  I have no idea what’s going on with the pony tail song.

Who cares about the Rangers?

Posted on June 16, 2009 by Andyzipp in Columnistas, Off Day

off-day-largeAfter winning 5 series in a row, your Houston Astros are still in last place.  But with momentum. I guess.

It may just be me, but I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop with this team.  Maybe it’s the sudden rash of injuries, or the fact that the current run has been against some of the worst teams in baseball.  Maybe it’s that the manager isn’t really skilled at his job or that there just aren’t that many good pitchers in the rotation.  Maybe it’s the pin-striped uniforms or the lack of edible foodstuff at Mandatory Concessions Park at Union Station.

 

Anyway, the team is in, according the schedule, Texas to play the Rangers in a series that has no meaning what so ever, (outside of wins and losses), shiny footwear be damned.  I know we go through this every year, but Interleague play is just a bad idea.  Besides forcing fake rivalries down the throats of the baseball watching public, besides the competitive imbalance it creates, besides the “rotation” that has brought the Red Sox and Yankees to Houston exactly once in the 13 years while setting up crucial series Kansas City and Minnesota season after season, the whole is flawed because of the one difference between the American and National leagues…the designated hitter.

 

When the Rangers traveled to Houston a couple of weeks ago, they crushed the Astros, sweeping them and racking up 17 runs to the Astros’ 8.  The Rangers, because there’s no DH in the Senior Circuit, were forced to “shuffle” their line up by choosing to play either Hank Blalock (.251/.294/.529) or Michael Young (.316/.359/.500) at 3rd.  On a side note, it was the first time in a very long time I remember feeling that the Astros were outclassed.  This series the Astros are going to juggle by playing a gimpy Carlos Lee at DH, which is likely going to mean a steady diet of Jason Michaels (.189/.271/.321).  American League teams carry a Hank Blalock or Jason Kubel or Jeff Larish on their roster with the express idea that they’re going to hit four or five times a game.  National League teams carry bench players like Michaels and Darin Erstad because they can field their positions capably and might be able to provide a little offense here and there.

 

To win the Silver Boot, the Astros would have to sweep the Rangers while outscoring them by 9 runs overall. Since that’s not going to happen, the Rangers can, to paraphrase the eloquent Tanner Boyle, take their trophy and shove it straight up their ass. Texas has won 20 of 33 home games this season, but have also dropped three of their last four home series (hello, June).  The Astros need to concentrate on winning series, and traveling to Texas(?) is as good a place as any to continue that.

 

But other than winning the games, who cares?  There is no rivalry here.  I don’t know that there ever has been.  Over their respective histories, the Astros and Rangers have mostly inconsequential in the grand scheme of baseball.  The Astros have had more division titles, playoff appearances and pennants (1).  The Rangers have still never won a playoff series, and are more known for overreaching franchise weirdness than anything else.  All things considered, I’d rather have another set of games with the Cubs or Cardinals (or Reds or Pirates or Brewers) than visiting Arlington, or Minnesota or 8 Mile.

 

I would guess Rangers fans feel the same way, but I’ve never met one.  I assume they’re all going to be glued to taped coverage of the luncheon the Cowboys are putting on for their employees in the Jerry Dome.  I’m not going to research whether or not they televise that kind of thing, but I’m leaning towards they absolutely do.

 

Safe At Home

 

Talk Zone favorite Alyssa Milano has written a book, Safe At Home: Confessions of a Baseball Fanatic. In the interest of full disclosure, I haven’t read it.  I haven’t read reviews of it.  I have a general idea that it’s some sort of quasi-biography set against her life as a baseball fan.  And while I do spend nights thinking about her and balls, in a way, I’m probably never going to purchase this.  I did pick it up because I saw this:

in a Barnes and Noble as I was busy drinking over-priced coffee and reading books for free. (Seriously, how do they make money?  The mark-up on coffee can’t be that good.) Spoiler Alert: That’s the only picture in the book.  I may be just a simple man, not wise to the mysterious ways of publishing, but damn man, how do you not have a a picture of that woman handling balls (and bats).  And if the star of Embrace of the Vampire is taking herself too seriously…have this chick fill in:

I don’t know what a Transformer is, but I will gladly give $12.50 to a movie theatre-type establishment if this woman is sweating her way through several scenes.

The Future Is Now?

Posted on June 8, 2009 by Andyzipp in Columnistas, Off Day

off-day-largeThe good news…The Astros have won their last three series, including this weekend’s home tilt with the Pirates of Pittsburgh. They’re climbing (ever so slowly) back to .500 and after a pretty bad start to the season are only 5 games back of the wildcard spot in the National League.

The bad news…The Astros played the Pyrites two of those three series and the hapless Rockies the other. Despite the recent good stretch, they’re still dead last in the National League Central. They still have the 7th worst record in Major League Baseball and they’re are still looking up at the business end of 9 other teams for a playoff spot.

It’s all a matter of what you want to see, I suppose. While it’s cool to go 7-3 over the last 10 games, and be the “hottest” team in the division over that span, it’s akin to being the hottest granny in the nursing home. (Please forgive anything you might have just read that lead your mind towards granny-porn. Limey.) In the grand scheme of things, the questions remain: Are the last 3 series representative of a team that is starting to turn things around?  Or is this a team that just got one over on two of the only teams playing worse than they are?  It’s easy to assume that’s the case, but this is the same team that struggled to split two games with Washington a few weeks ago. More to the point, after 55 games, does anyone know what the Astros are capable of this season? Are the last 117 going to be any different?

Through the first two months, the 2009 season has been an amalgamation of questionable decision making, cancer, piss-poor defense, a face-plant, injuries, and woeful inconsistency at the plate. It hasn’t been pretty, but maybe it looks worse because of the various side-shows that have made it alternatingly fascinating and unbearable, sort of like Rock of Love I, II and Bus. Take away the on-going Cecil Cooper drama, Sean Berry’s cancer, this site’s fascination with Alyson Footer’s career choices and what are we left with? A team with a pair of All-Stars who have played more like Lenny and Squiggy than Berkman and Oswalt. A team with exactly zero off-season acquisitions working out the way the front-office hoped. A team with a bullpen that is almost completely different from the one that ended last season, in terms of personnel as well as role. A team full of aging, high priced veterans heading towards the end of their careers. A team with only 8 players under the age of 30. All of these thing has lead at least one interested observer to state on the record that it may be time to start rebuilding with younger players. That interested observer is one Drayton McLane.

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How significant is this apparent change of heart from the man who has as recently as this spring publicly declared, “We don’t rebuild, we reload”? Well, it’s a lot more significant than what account is making direct deposits in Footer’s bank account. For the first time besides fanboy handwringing, there is legitimate reason to believe that unless the Stros make a significant run between now and July 31st, veterans like Ivan Rodriguez, Miguel Tejada, Darrin Erstad, Geoff Blum, Kaz Matsui, Mike Hampton, Jose Valverde are going to be shopped. The franchise may put a real premium on getting pieces for the future for the first time since the early 90’s. The very recent (yesterday) move of Jason Castro to AA Corpus Christi may be the first really transparent move towards getting this franchise “ready” for 2010. Or 2011. For a franchise that usually shows all the foresight and planning of a dog chasing a tennis ball across a linoleum floor, this is a very big deal.

On the other hand, if the Astros were to win 7 of their next 10 (Cubs, Diamondbacks, Rangers, Twins), the Astros would be only a game under .500 and in the thick of another wild card race. Win the 7 of 10 after that (Twins, Royals, Tigers, Padres) and Houston is “allofasuddenlike” 39-36 with 12 of their last 14 at home before the All-Star break. Five of those are against the Nationals. The point is, the season is absolutely still salvageable. Oswalt will eventually get the cortisone shot he needs, Berkman will start hitting the way history suggests he will, the bullpen will start getting some healthy bodies back. If thats the case, the real question becomes, does Ed Wade have the ability, or the inclination to go to McLane and tell him, “What’s going on on the field is an anomally. We still need to move some of these players”?

Either way, the remainder of the season is going to be an interesting one. If the Astros are competitive up until the break, and can come close to the second half of 2008 (which I still have to believe is the real hope at Union Station, despite any lunch-time talk) that will be a lot of fun. This team was a hurricane away from the playoffs last year. If they trip on their collective dicks over the next 30 games, we get to see just how good a general manager Ed Wade really is. It’s also possible that the Astros can deal a Miguel Tejada or a Jose Valverde, get prospects for 2010 (or 2011) and stay in the hunt this season. It’s up to the on-field talent to chart the course from here on out.

And now for something completely different…

In a very short amount of time, Hunter Pence has risen to the forefront of not only the

Astros roster, but the very center of the TalkZone subconscious. He even has been granted the unique and not-at-all-0verdone honor of having a area of seats graced with his name, “Hunter’s Lodge”. As such, he has earned several nicknames…Gunther, Thunderpants, Pane in the Ass, and simply PENCE!!!

I would like to humbly suggest a new addition…

Whitey McSkullshirt.

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