Athletics 10 Astros 1
Contributed by Mr. Happy
Little did we know it at the time, but this one was over in the top of the first frame, when Bo Donaldson & the Heywoods clubbed the first of his two long balls to give Oakland and Scott Kazmir (3-0) an early 2-0 lead that they would never relinquish. Poor Brett Oberholltzer (0-4) was pretty ordinary tonight, leaving too many pitches over the plate, and the A’s didn’t miss them. Alberto Callaspo also contributed a line drive home run as the Athletics garnered 14 knocks in the game. As bad as it was, it could have been worse—the Athletics were 3-14 w/RISP and had 11 LOBsters. The Astros made five, count ‘em, five fucking errors. Sheesh. Pick up that damn ball for crying out loud.
Oberholtzer didn’t get out of the fourth frame, surrendering six earnies and two free passes. Paul Clemens relieved Oberholzer and pitched rather ineffectively until the home plate umpire, Toby Basner, ran him for dotting former Astro Jed Lowrie in what appeared to be a hangover from last week’s shenanigans. If Clemens gets fined, I’d demand that Porter pay it, because I’m convinced that Porter gave that order. On the bright side, if there is one in a 10-1 ass kicking, punching bag Jerome Williams, whose lifetime BAA against the Athletics was around .370 in over 100 ABs, pitched two scoreless and hitless frames to bring his ERA down under 6, so he’s got that going for him.
Despite only putting one run, the Astros had ten hits. Jose Altuve led the way with three hits, while Matt Dominguez and Jonathan Villar contributed two hits apiece. Situational hitting was a bug-a-boo again because the club was 1-10 w/RISP and had 11 LOBsters. Saddle up sports fans, we’ve got the A’s again tonight, with Brad Peacock taking the hill against Jesse Chavez in another rematch from last week. Let’s pray that this one goes better than the rematch last night.