Petco Park
After a Valverde tainted almost-sweep of the Detroit Tigers, the Good Guys hit the road on a West Coast swing to take on the Whale Vaginas of San Diego. Here’s my break down of it down and dirty style, mostly because I hate Mondays almost as much as I hate West Coast Road Trips.
Projected Starters from Astros.com
Monday
Roy Oswalt (3-4, 4.30) v. Josh Geer (1-2, 5.68)
Oswalt is rounding out in to form nicely right now. His last two starts he went complete game style against the Twins in a loss (gave up 5 runs, but 2 of them came in the 8th inning, when things were looking pretty grim already) and got a no decision against the Royals desipte leaving with the lead after pitching six masterful innings of one run baseball. He has good career numbers against the Padres, at Petco, and against most of the Padres hitters. The few notable exceptions: Brian Giles (15-50, 1 HR), David Dickstain (10-34, shockingly NO RBIs), Cliff Floyd (8-27, 2 HR and I didn’t even know he was still in the majors), and Adrian Gonzalez (6-13, 2 HR).
Geer sucks on ice. His ERA has been 5+ every month so far this year, he’s given up 17 home runs (7 of which were given up at home in 7 starts. Think about that for a second. 7 home runs AT Petcave!!!) in 70.2 innings. The bad news is, his last two starts have been decent to the tune of 3 runs over 6 innings. The Astros haven’t seen much of him, but their team numbers are pretty promising: 7 hits in 16 at bats, with a Miggy home run included in there.
Tuesday
Mike Hampton (4-5, 4.70) v. Josh Banks (0-0, 2.84)
Hampy is coming off the DL and going straight back in to the rotation for this start. He’s had a rollercoaster first few months of the season, pitching great in most of his wins and getting shelled in most of his losses. Petco should be a nice welcome back for Mike, as he can make some mistakes up in the zone without watching them scrape the ceiling, kill someone in the Crawford Boxes, shatter another windowpane on the left field wall, or put another dent in the goddamn train tracks. The Padres have managed to not see much of Mike, the only guy with any decent numbers against him is Brian Giles (15-39, 1 HR). Floyd (6-24, 1 HR) does okay against him. Everyone else that’s seen him hasn’t had any success at all.
I know what you’re asking now. Who the hell is Josh Banks? Well, I don’t know either. Apparently he was the Padre long reliever until Wade LeBlanc finally sucked enough to get sent back down to AAA. I can’t even imagine the things I would do to not get sent to Portland, but I’d imagine ol’ Wade’s knees are probably carpet burnt all to hell from his last ditch attempt to convince Kevin Towers to not ship him out. Unsurprisingly, none of the Astros have seen much of him. Three total hits between three players in seven tries between Miggy, Keppenger, and Jason Michaels (who hit a 2 run shibby in his only appearance against Josh).
Wednesday
Brian Moehler (4-4, 6.05) v. Walter Silva (0-1, 9.35)
The only person happier to be in San Diego than Lance Berkman (YIPPIE! They’ve got an awesome Zoo/Aquarium!) is Brian Moehler. Petco’s spacious outfield borders just might be enough to slow down the alarming ratio of giving up a home run every 5 innings. Brian Giles (6-19, 1 HR), Adrian Gonzalez (5-10), and David Dickstain (3-7) all have had some success against Brian.
Once again, I can hear you asking, “Mark, who the hell is Walter Silva?” And again, my answer to you is, “I have no fucking idea.” From what I can gather though, he isn’t exactly Cy Young. In 4 career starts, he’s given up 18 earned runs in 17 innings, including 3 home runs. His last start was a disaster, with the Rangers clubbing him for eight earned runs in 2 1/3 innings. Unsurprisingly, the Good Guys haven’t ever faced Walter… So expect him to actually channel some Cy Young this game.
Thursday
Wandy Rodriguez (6-6, 3.35) v. Kevin Correia (5-5, 4.23)
Wandy started the season off looking amazing, and has since slid back down to mere mortal levels, and his last 4 starts have either been amazing or so-so/terrible. The good news is, he’s definitely due for a good one against the Padres. Dickstain (7-18), Scott Hairston (4-9, 2 HR), Adrian Gonzalez (3-9, HR), and Brian Giles (4-13) all have had pretty good success against Wandy. Everyone else is pretty awful.
And once again, it’s time to play everybody’s favorite gameshow! WHO! THE FUCK! IS THIS PADRE PITCHER?!!?!? Again, I have no idea. Never heard of him. He had a pretty impressive June though, sporting a 4-2 record with a 3.08 ERA and a 34/6 K/BB ratio. The Astros haven’t seen much of him, and as a team are batting .240. Kaz is a putrid 0-8 against him, and pretty much everyone else has one hit in somewhere between two and six at bats. Kabong, on the other hand, is three of five with 2 doubles against him.
Not a goddamn thing. No stupid looking bobblehead. No hobby horse. No nothing. You get nothing and like it. GOOD DAY SIR!
Astros
Nothing new to report here. Aaron Boone still is recovering from a busted ticker. Doug Brocail is still suffering from some horrible torn something in his leg that makes me cringe every time I think about it.
Padres
Jesus Christ, I’m going to need to hire a temp to enter all this information…
Cha Seung Baek is the chinese chicken. With a strained tendon apparently.
Cliff Floyd is old… And on 60 day DL with a torn labrum.
Brian Giles has a right knee contusion and is on the DL until July 4th.
Jake Peavy has a partially torn tendon in his ankle, and is set to be examined on June 30th.
And here’s a list of the rest of the schlubs:
Luke Gregerson
Shawn Hill
Nick Hundley
Mark Prior
Will Venable
Mark Worrell
Our Interesting Things to Look For
Keep up with all the work-week action in the GameZone, if you can manage to stay up late enough to actually keep up with any of the games.