Tigers @ Astros April 16, 2016

[Mr. Happy]

Your lineups for tonight's tilt:

Tigers

2BIan Kinsler (R)
LFJustin Upton (R)
1BMiguel Cabrera (R)
DHVictor Martinez (S)
RFJ.D. Martinez (R)
3BN. Castellanos (R)
CJ. Saltalamacchia (S)
CFAnthony Gose (L)
SSJose Iglesias (R)

DET: Justin Verlander (R)  (0-1, 8.71)

Astros

2B Jose Altuve (R)
RF George Springer (R)
SS Carlos Correa (R)
LF Colby Rasmus (L)
1B Tyler White (R)
DH Preston Tucker (L)
CF Carlos Gomez (R)
3B Luis Valbuena (L)
C Jason Castro (L)

HOU: Collin McHugh (R)  (1-1, 6.14)

[HudsonHawk]

T1:

Kinsler grounds out 6-3
Upton strikes out swinging
Cabrera flies out F9 on the first pitch

0-0

[HudsonHawk]

Springer Dinger!!!

2-0 Astros

[Mr. Happy]

I started Verlander tonight to give us good luck.

[Knoxbanedoodle]

Sparks took the word out of my mouth (or keyboard, as the case may be)--"missile"! Fuck, what a shot!

[Mr. Happy]

Verlander's velo is down from his heyday.

[HudsonHawk]

White!!!!

3-0 Astros

[MusicMan]

Sparks took the word out of my mouth (or keyboard, as the case may be)--"missile"! Fuck, what a shot!

Hardest he's ever hit a ball according to Statcast.

[HudsonHawk]

B1:

Altuve singles to LF
Springer crushes a HR off the LF foul pole...PEOPLE GOTTA EAT, Altuve scores
Correa strikes out swinging
Rasmus strikes out swinging
White homers to LF
Tucker pops out F5

After one...Astros grab a quick 3-0 lead!

[juliogotay]

Hardest he's ever hit a ball according to Statcast.

He has certainly been swinging hard enough lately.

[Knoxbanedoodle]

Didn't go down to a knee then, either.

[juliogotay]

Didn't go down to a knee then, either.

He wold have if he didn't make contact.

[Knoxbanedoodle]

Who televises the NBA playoffs?

[HudsonHawk]

Tigers with three doubles in the last four hitters, 3-1 now

[HudsonHawk]

T2:

Martinez doubles to RCF, past a diving Gomez
Martinez...0-2...strikes out looking
Castellanos doubles to LCF, Martinez scores, Castellanos thrown out 7-6-5 trying to stretch it into a triple
Saltalamacchia with a rule book double
Gose strikes out swinging

3-1 Astros

[HudsonHawk]

Just booked my trip to the Texans game in Green Bay in December...one more off the Sports Bucket List!

[HudsonHawk]

B2:

Gomez grounds out 5-3
Valbuena strikes out swinging
Castro...0-2...1-2...strikes out swinging

Through two...Astros up 3-1

[HudsonHawk]

T3:

Ingelsias singles up the middle
Kinsler flies out F8
Upton flies out F9
Cabrera with an infield single...Correa knocked it down, but couldn't nip the runner, Inglesias to 2B
Martinez grounds out 4-3

3-1 Astros

[HudsonHawk]

Who televises the NBA playoffs?

Rockets game was on ABC, at least locally.  It may have been ESPN outside of Houston.

[HudsonHawk]

The Mark West Carneros Pinot Noir is a nice sitting on the patio watching the game wine.  I'm on my second bottle. 

[Knoxbanedoodle]

We are the TOOTBLANiest team I've ever seen.

[HudsonHawk]

We are the TOOTBLANiest team I've ever seen.

That was a legitimate pickoff.  I like that they run a lot, I like that they're aggressive with a 2-run lead.  Pickoffs happen.  That one doesn't bother me.

[HudsonHawk]

Astros with runners at the corners with 2 out...

[NeilT]

The Blum/Ashby discussion about on-field enforcement was interesting.  it may have been the best Ashby sequence I've heard.

[HudsonHawk]

B3:

Altuve...works the count full...draws a leadoff walk
Altuve picked off of 1B
Springer singles to LF
Correa walks, Springer to 2B
Rasmus grounds into FC, Correa out 3-6, Springer to 3B
White...0-2...1-2...2-2...full count...strikes out looking

3-1 still

[Knoxbanedoodle]

I like that they're aggressive too, but I've never seen a team get picked off as much as these Astros.

[NeilT]

Not many teams run as much, do they?

[HudsonHawk]

I like that they're aggressive too, but I've never seen a team get picked off as much as these Astros.

I hear you. And it's frustrating.  I just think that one was one of those "thems the breaks when you're aggressive" one. 

[HudsonHawk]

T4:

Martinez strikes out swinging
Castellanos singles to CF
Saltalamacchia...0-2...strikes out swinging
Gose...0-2...strikes out swinging

3-1 still

[HudsonHawk]

B4:

Tucker grounds out 1-3 on the first pitch
Gomez with a Texas Leaguer to RF
Gomez swipes 2B
Valbeuena strikes out swinging
Castro strikes out looking

3-1 still

[HudsonHawk]

I need more wine.  Anyone wanna help me out?

[Knoxbanedoodle]

I'll pick it up for a bit.

[HudsonHawk]

I'll pick it up for a bit.

Let me clarify...I don't need someone to do PBP, I need someone to buy me more win.

[NeilT]

Let me clarify...I don't need someone to do PBP, I need someone to buy me more win.

That's an equipment failure, only two bottles of wine.

[HudsonHawk]

Double and an error on White makes it 3-2

[BizidyDizidy]

I need more wine.  Anyone wanna help me out?

This is why you need at least 200 bottles of storage - cant run out.

[BudGirl]

Double and an error on White makes it 3-2

you and White having equipment failures.  Let's hope the Astros can get out of this inning without giving up the lead.

[MikeyBoy]

Let me clarify...I don't need someone to do PBP, I need someone to buy me more win.

Become a Yankee fan?

[HudsonHawk]

That's an equipment failure, only two bottles of wine.

Actually, I have several more bottles of Mrs. Hawk's "Tuesday Night" wine.  I need the good stuff.

[BizidyDizidy]

Actually, I have several more bottles of Mrs. Hawk's "Tuesday Night" wine.  I need the good stuff.

The Mark West is like 15 bucks - what do you make Mrs. Hawk drink?

[NeilT]

Actually, I have several more bottles of Mrs. Hawk's "Tuesday Night" wine.  I need the good stuff.

That's the great thing about the third bottle. It's always good.

[HudsonHawk]

T5:

Inglesias doubles to LCF on a first pitch hanging slider
Kinsler flies out F8
Upton grounds to 3B, throw goes right through the web of White's glove into the stands, E3, Inglesias scores, Upton to 2B
Cabrera doubles to RF, Upton, for whatever reason, stops at 3B
Martinez...0-2...1-2...2-2...pops out F5
Martinez...0-2...1-2...strikes out swinging

Tiggers get a run to cut it 3-2, but good job by McHugh to pitch around the tough luck error.

[BudGirl]

nice way to end that inning Mr. McHugh.

[Knoxbanedoodle]

Top 5:

Iglesias thwacks a leadoff double.
Kinsler pops out to center. Iglesias holds.
Upton reaches on a freak error on a grounder to third when White's glove fails. Run scores. Upton to second.
Cabrera doubles into right, Upton to third. Come back, HH!
V. Martinez pops out to Valbuena.
Strommy to the mound to, in Sparks's words, "Give him a little blow."
J.D. Martinez K's swinging! McHugh!

3-2 good guys!

[HudsonHawk]

That's the great thing about the third bottle. It's always good.

She drinks "Cul de Sac".  It's $25 for a six pack.

[Knoxbanedoodle]

Oh, excellent, Mrs Babedoodle is throwing pillows at me, so this works.

[HudsonHawk]

Oh, excellent, Mrs Babedoodle is throwing pillows at me, so this works.

Well alright, cowboy...go get her...

[HudsonHawk]

Springer needs to take a bag here...

[NeilT]

Posting on the game zone to get your wife to throw pillows qualifies as kinky.

[BizidyDizidy]

Just polished off the Turley Vineyard 101 - think its scotch time.

[NeilT]

Turkey: the official wine of owa.

[HudsonHawk]

B5:

Altuve grounds out 5-3
Springer lines a single to CF, third hit of the night
Correa flies out F9 at the track as Ashby cries yard
Rasmus...3-1...3-2 on a changeup in the dirt...stirkes out swinging at ball five in the dirt

3-2 through five

[HudsonHawk]

Just polished off the Turley Vineyard 101 - think its scotch time.

Good to see you go for it tonight.  It better not be the fucking Cutty Sark.

[BizidyDizidy]

Pre-wine I was drinking Great King Street and soda (recommend the King Street if you like a blended). Think I'll have some Glenlivet now. Was drinking Hakushu last night,mwhich is great if you don't mind a Japanese scotch.

[HudsonHawk]

Saltalamacchia with a 2-run home run makes it 4-3 Tigers

[HudsonHawk]

Japanese scotch.

I don't even know what this means.

[BizidyDizidy]

I don't even know what this means.

You're missing out

[HudsonHawk]

McHugh out, Neshek in...Astros down 4-3 with one out in the 6th.

[chuck]

Just booked my trip to the Texans game in Green Bay in December...one more off the Sports Bucket List!

I did this eight years ago. It was minus three degrees when we left the hotel. I wore five layers of clothes. My camera literally froze after two pictures. It was totally worth it.

Pro tip #1: Do NOT leave your tailgate beer in the car overnight.

Pro tip #2: If you wish to drink beer inside the stadium DO bring a hip flask. (Bring one anyway...) You will need the additional alcohol to keep the beer from freezing solid in your hand. I am not kidding.

We went to the Stadium View bar Saturday night. I can't think of a better place to spend a Saturday night before a Texans game in Green Bay. Actually, I can't think of another place to spend a Saturday night in Green Bay. Anyway, my cousin and I were in there watching college football on several of the 600 TVs they have in there along with lots of other Texans fans. After a couple of hours we couldn't help but notice that, well, let's just say there was not an overabundance of hotties in the place. I mean, it was grim. GRIM.

I get up and go to the men's room. I'm standing in there among other guys doing their business. We're mostly all doing what guys do in that situation, keep your head down, get done with what you're doing and get the hell out of there before anything regrettable happens. As I'm finishing up a guy with an unmistakable Houston accent shouts into the relative silence, Theeeese'ur tha uhhhgliest wimmins, Ah huv evvur seen, HIN MAH LIFE!

I was laughing so hard when I walked out of there, and the guys behind me must have been laughing, too, that my cousin was seriously confused. It took me at least five minutes to gather myself enough to explain what had happened.

The Texans won, but honestly it would have been more than enough to have that memorable experience with strangers in the men's room.

And so rarely do I have the opportunity to say that.

[HudsonHawk]

Strike zone has suddenly shrunk to the size of a donut.

[HudsonHawk]

T6:

Castellanos singles to LF on a ball in the dirt
Saltalamacchia homers to RF...Castellanos scores...Tigers lead 4-3
Gose grounds out 4-3 on a blue star play by Altuve

That's it for McHugh, Neshek in

Inglesias...3-1...walks
Kinsler...quickly 0-2...fouls off a couple...still 0-2...strikes out swinging
Inglesias thrown out trying to steal 2B...Tigers challenging...gonna get overturned...yep, overturned, stolen base
Upton strikes out

Tigers grab a 4-3 lead.

[HudsonHawk]

I did this eight years ago. It was minus three degrees when we left the hotel. I wore five layers of clothes. My camera literally froze after two pictures. It was totally worth it.

Pro tip #1: Do NOT leave your tailgate beer in the car overnight.

Pro tip #2: If you wish to drink beer inside the stadium DO bring a hip flask. (Bring one anyway...) You will need the additional alcohol to keep the beer from freezing solid in your hand. I am not kidding.

We went to the Stadium View bar Saturday night. I can't think of a better place to spend a Saturday night before a Texans game in Green Bay. Actually, I can't think of another place to spend a Saturday night in Green Bay. Anyway, my cousin and I were in there watching college football on several of the 600 TVs they have in there along with lots of other Texans fans. After a couple of hours we couldn't help but notice that, well, let's just say there was not an overabundance of hotties in the place. I mean, it was grim. GRIM.

I get up and go to the men's room. I'm standing in there among other guys doing their business. We're mostly all doing what guys do in that situation, keep your head down, get done with what you're doing and get the hell out of there before anything regrettable happens. As I'm finishing up a guy with an unmistakable Houston accent shouts into the relative silence, Theeeese'ur tha uhhhgliest wimmins, Ah huv evvur seen, HIN MAH LIFE!

I was laughing so hard when I walked out of there, and the guys behind me must have been laughing, too, that my cousin was seriously confused. It took me at least five minutes to gather myself enough to explain what had happened.

The Texans won, but honestly it would have been more than enough to have that memorable experience with strangers in the men's room.

And so rarely do I have the opportunity to say that.

Excellent tips.  We were wondering where to drink on Saturday night.

And I read your men's room anecdote out loud to my wife and she nearly spit wine out of her nose.  Props.

ETA:  My wife then tells a story of when she was dating some yahoo from Ohio, and when he visited, he remarked at how he couldn't believe how hot all the women were in Texas.  She remarked "what the fuck do you have in Ohio?"

[HudsonHawk]

B6:

White flies out F9
Tucker with an infield single
Gomez grounds into 5-4-3 double play

4-3 Tigers

[chuck]

ETA:  My wife then tells a story of when she was dating some yahoo from Ohio, and when he visited, he remarked at how he couldn't believe how hot all the women were in Texas.  She remarked "what the fuck do you have in Ohio?"

I was always oddly attracted to the young Kelley Deal.

[HudsonHawk]

I was always oddly attracted to the young Kelley Deal.

Yes, that would be odd.

[HudsonHawk]

Listening to Ashby try to pronounce a Spanish surname is brutal.

[HudsonHawk]

T7:

Giles, the "Home Run Buffet", in for the Astros...

Cabrera taps back to the mound...1-3
Martinez flies out F7 on the first pitch
Martinez singles to RCF on the first pitch
Martinez to 2B on wild pitch
Castellanos strikes out swinging

At the stretch...4-3 Tigers

[chuck]

Yes, that would be odd.

I guess the point is that that's the outer edge of the spectrum up there.

Oh, you know what, a girl that lived above me in New York had a friend from Columbus who she, bless her heart, arduously tried to get to sleep with me. For some incomprehensible reason Columbus girl, Jenny, was reluctant. She was sort of interesting to me in part because she was in a graduate program for modern dance. One night when Jenny was in town we all went out and ended up in a place where there was, you guessed it, dancing. I expected these modern dance chicks to go out there and really cut a rug. I remember Jenny's dancing well. It was sort of what you would expect from someone leaping out of a not yet stopped car at a highway rest stop racing for the restroom urged on by the specter of violent diarrhea.

[JaneDoe]

Listening to Ashby is brutal.

You are correct, sir.

[chuck]

Castro wears me out.

[HudsonHawk]

B7:

Wilson in for the Tigers...

Marwin, pinch hitting for Valuena, singles to LF
Castro grounds into 4-6-3 double play
Altuve strikes out swinging on a check swing.

4-3 Tigers

[HudsonHawk]

I guess the point is that that's the outer edge of the spectrum up there.

Oh, you know what, a girl that lived above me in New York had a friend from Columbus who she, bless her heart, arduously tried to get to sleep with me. For some incomprehensible reason Columbus girl, Jenny, was reluctant. She was sort of interesting to me in part because she was in a graduate program for modern dance. One night when Jenny was in town we all went out and ended up in a place where there was, you guessed it, dancing. I expected these modern dance chicks to go out there and really cut a rug. I remember Jenny's dancing well. It was sort of what you would expect from someone leaping out of a not yet stopped car at a highway rest stop racing for the restroom urged on by the specter of violent diarrhea.

Not quite as colorful, but when I was in college I was goofy over this girl named Suzy.  Suzy wasn't all that hot, but she was from California, and she knew about wine, and politics, listened to all kinds of new age music and talked emphatically about the CIA's involvement in Guatemala...basically the complete opposite of every big-haired Texas girl I'd ever known. We ended up back in her dorm room one night, and one thing led to another, mostly at my urging.  It was interesting, but only later did I realize she was only reluctant because she was really wanting to wait for her roommate, who was of some mixed racial origin, to come home.  I still kick myself for my impatience.   

[NeilT]

I had a date to homecoming.

[NeilT]

I bought her a mum.

[HudsonHawk]

I bought her a mum.

Did you stick your hand down her dress?

[NeilT]

Don't remember.

[HudsonHawk]

T8:

Harris in...

Saltalamacchia flies out F7
Gose grounds past a drawn in Marwin for a single
Inglesias grounds into FC, Gose out 5-4, but no double play
Kinsler grounds to 2B, but Altuve is not there...single, Inglesias to 3B
Upton strikes out looking

4-3 Tigers still

[HudsonHawk]

Don't remember.

Trust me...if you did, you'd remember.

[HudsonHawk]

Correa now 2 for his last 17, with  no extra base hits and 1 RBI

[HudsonHawk]

B8:

Mark Lowe in for the Tigs

Springer grounds out 6-3 on the first pitch
Correa grounds out 6-3
Rasmus strikes out looking

4-3 headed to the 9th

[chuck]

Not quite as colorful, but when I was in college I was goofy over this girl named Suzy.  Suzy wasn't all that hot, but she was from California, and she knew about wine, and politics, listened to all kinds of new age music and talked emphatically about the CIA's involvement in Guatemala...basically the complete opposite of every big-haired Texas girl I'd ever known. We ended up back in her dorm room one night, and one thing led to another, mostly at my urging.  It was interesting, but only later did I realize she was only reluctant because she was really wanting to wait for her roommate, who was of some mixed racial origin, to come home.  I still kick myself for my impatience.

Let the game come to you.

[doyce7]

How many fucking times have they watched strike 3 tonight? I feel like it happens once an inning.

[NeilT]

Trust me...if you did, you'd remember.

Trust me, at my age, you won't remember. She was The girl next door though

[HudsonHawk]

How many fucking times have they watched strike 3 tonight? I feel like it happens once an inning.

Haven't added up the caught looking, but the Astros are on pace to obliterate their own thought to be untouchable season strike out record.

[BudGirl]

Marisnick deserves a start tomorrow.

[HudsonHawk]

Single, double...5-3 Tigers now

[chuck]

I'm ready for Marisnick.

[BudGirl]

I'm ready for Marisnick.

For defense alone.  If he gets a hit it would be a cherry on top of ice cream.

[HudsonHawk]

T9:

Fields in for the Astros...

Cabrera singles to CF
Martinez doubles over Gomez's head...didn't get much of a jump on that one, and took a "curious" route...Cabrera scores, 5-3 Tigers
Martinez flies out F8
Castellanos...full count... strikes out swinging
Saltalamacchia lines one to 1B

Astros down to their last three outs, chasing a pair

[BudGirl]

3 up 3 down coming.

[HudsonHawk]

B9:

KRod in...

White flies out F8
Tucker grounds out 3-1
Gomez...3-0...3-1...pops out to shallow right

Astros take it in the shorts 5-3

[doyce7]

Man this was a frustrating game. 3 in the first and shit the rest of the game.

[BudGirl]

How frustrating to start a game great and then just go cold.

[chuck]

Music to the ears of Astros fans: 'It's all in the hands of Carlos Gomez!'

This is one sloppy fucking team.

[chuck]

I'm going to miss Vin Scully like you have no idea.