Derek Jeter Announces Retirement, Gets Farewell Roadtrip Bling for Six Months

[SoonerJim]

http://msn.foxsports.com/mlb/story/derek-jeter-announces-he-will-retire-after-2014-season-021214?cmpid=msn%3Afoxsports%3Aansfox11

Did not want to create a "distraction"

[Bench]

Did not want to create a "distraction"

Homophobe.

[Reuben]

So, early bets on which NL pitcher is assigned to groove him a meatball during the All-Star game?

[Limey]

So, early bets on which NL pitcher is assigned to groove him a meatball during the All-Star game?

...before he waltzes into the Hall of Fame on the first ballot - probably the first unanimous electee - despite spending his entire career surrounded by more roiders and juicers than Vince McMahon.

Fuck Derek Jeter.

[Bench]

...before he waltzes into the Hall of Fame on the first ballot - probably the first unanimous electee - despite spending his entire career surrounded by more roiders and juicers than Vince McMahon.

Fuck Derek Jeter.

So Ruth, Gehrig, DiMaggio and Mantle (in whatever order) are obviously the best four Yankees of all time. Who rounds out the top five? Where is Jeter's place in franchise history?

[Lefty]

Best second baseman I ever saw play shortstop.

[Jose Cruz III]

...before he waltzes into the Hall of Fame on the first ballot - probably the first unanimous electee - despite spending his entire career surrounded by more roiders and juicers than Vince McMahon.

Fuck Derek Jeter.

I couldn't have said it better myself. But since he was a good player he had to be a juicer himself, according to the BBWAA.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

So Ruth, Gehrig, DiMaggio and Mantle (in whatever order) are obviously the best four Yankees of all time. Who rounds out the top five? Where is Jeter's place in franchise history?

Ruth, Gehrig, Mantle, DiMaggio, Rivera, Berra, Jeter, Ford. I got him slotted as seventh best.

[Reuben]

Ruth, Gehrig, Mantle, DiMaggio, Rivera, Berra, Jeter, Ford. I got him slotted as seventh best.

No way a 60-inning-a-year pitcher can be greater than Yogi Berra, probably one of the two greatest catchers of all-time.

[Limey]

Best second baseman I ever saw play shortstop.

The Onion has a nice retrospective on Jeter's career, as seen through their prism.  It includes articles such as:

Yankees Warn Eduardo Nunez To Stop Showing Up Derek Jeter By Making Routine Plays At Shortstop

Derek Jeter Just 6 Squib Grounders, Shallow Bloops Away From 3,000 Hits

Derek Jeter Rejects Move To Outfield By Reminding Yankees That He's Derek Fucking Jeter

Derek Jeter Makes Easy Play Look Easy

Derek Jeter Honored For Having Fewer Hits Than Harold Baines

[Bench]

"There's Never Been A Yankee Who's Mattered More"

[Reuben]

"There's Never Been A Yankee Who's Mattered More"

I admire their gift for understatement, but anything less than "There's Never Been a Human Being Who's Mattered More" borders on sacrilege, IMO.

[OregonStrosFan]

Best second baseman I ever saw play shortstop.

I'd nominate this if there was such a thing...

[OregonStrosFan]

...before he waltzes into the Hall of Fame on the first ballot - probably the first unanimous electee - despite spending his entire career surrounded by more roiders and juicers than Vince McMahon.

Fuck Derek Jeter.

And all of those self-righteous asshats in the BBWAA...

[HudsonHawk]

Ruth, Gehrig, Mantle, DiMaggio, Rivera, Berra, Jeter, Ford. I got him slotted as seventh best.

Reminds me of the Seinfeld episode when George gets hired by the Yankees.  Jerry's reaction:

"THE New York Yankees??  Ruth, Gehrig, DiMaggio, Mantle.....Costanza?"

I can't in good conscious put a relief pitcher, a failed starter, that high on any list of greatest.

[Reuben]

Reminds me of the Seinfeld episode when George gets hired by the Yankees.  Jerry's reaction:

"THE New York Yankees??  Ruth, Gehrig, DiMaggio, Mantle.....Costanza?"

I can't in good conscious put a relief pitcher, a failed starter, that high on any list of greatest.

I thought the same thing, but maybe he meant Ruben Rivera.

[NeilT]

Chita.  http://www.chitarivera.com/bio.htm

[Lefty]

For his retirement tour, Jeter will give away an STD at every stop.

[chuck]

I thought the same thing, but maybe he meant Ruben Rivera.

Good old Ruben has both a rather infamous Jeter connection and the distinction of being the dumbest Panamanian professional athlete I can think of.

[Ebby Calvin]

I'd nominate this if there was such a thing...

What?  I'm caught up through July.  You fuckers just haven't been that funny lately.

[Bench]

What?  I'm caught up through July.  You fuckers just haven't been that funny lately.

Nominated.

[Mr. Happy]

For his retirement tour, Jeter will give away an STD at every stop.

SFN

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

I guess it's too late to say, I meant to slot Berra ahead of Rivera.

[Arky Vaughan]

Reminds me of the Seinfeld episode when George gets hired by the Yankees.  Jerry's reaction:

"THE New York Yankees??  Ruth, Gehrig, DiMaggio, Mantle.....Costanza?"

I can't in good conscious put a relief pitcher, a failed starter, that high on any list of greatest.

Yes, all relief pitchers are just failed starters and are of dubious value.

[Mr. Happy]

Yes, all relief pitchers are just failed starters and are of dubious value.

Even my broken sarc-meter went off on this one.

[HudsonHawk]

Yes, all relief pitchers are just failed starters and are of dubious value.

Why is it every time someone says Player X was not the greatest player in history, you respond with "yes, he obviously sucked donkey balls"?  Everything is a false dichotomy with you.

[Arky Vaughan]

Why is it every time someone says Player X was not the greatest player in history, you respond with "yes, he obviously sucked donkey balls"?  Everything is a false dichotomy with you.

I'm pretty sure I haven't said that every time or even any time. Nor, for the record, do I disagree with you that Rivera does not rank with Ruth, Gehrig, DiMaggio or Mantle, or Berra, for that matter.

But I don't agree with the proposition that a relief pitcher's value should be in question because a relief pitcher is a failed starter. If you do the job you're asked to do, and do it exceedingly well, then that shouldn't be diminished because you couldn't make it in another job. If you've got two great pitchers, and one's a starter while the other is a reliever, I won't argue against the claim that the starter is more valuable because his impact on the team's success may be greater. But that has nothing to do with the fact that the reliever wasn't able to do the starter's job when he came up. In the case of Rivera, he made 10 starts as a rookie, then proceeded to finish 952 games and post 652 saves. The fact that he failed to remain a starter after those 10 starts doesn't factor in to his value.

It's not like the manager or pitching coach calls the bullpen and says, "The game's on the line. Send in one of the failed starters to hold down the fort."

[Limey]

I think the amazing thing about Rivera, like Hoffman and a very few others, is longevity.  So many closers come and go, surviving for a while on their unfamiliarity with each of the hitters.  For most of them though, once the hitters have seen them a few times, the jig is up.

Not sure what this does to help rank Rivera as a Yankee, but it does, I think, point to the fact that he was not just a closer.  At his job in baseball, he was dominant for a decade.

[Bench]

I think the amazing thing about Rivera, like Hoffman and a very few others, is longevity.

It was all off of one pitch, but what a pitch it was. 

[Dark Star]

Good old Ruben has both a rather infamous Jeter connection and the distinction of being the dumbest Panamanian professional athlete I can think of.

Once traded for the negotiating rights to Hideki "The Fat Toad" Irabu.  Kind of a dubious distinction.

[Bench]

Once traded for the negotiating rights to Hideki "The Fat Toad" Irabu.  Kind of a dubious distinction.

You left out the best part of Irabu's nickname.  It was Fat Pussy Toad.

[HudsonHawk]

But I don't agree with the proposition that a relief pitcher's value should be in question because a relief pitcher is a failed starter.

I never proposed that.  I said I can't put Rivera's value over that of Jeter's.  That's a far cry from "Rivera was worthless".

[Arky Vaughan]

I never proposed that.  I said I can't put Rivera's value over that of Jeter's.  That's a far cry from "Rivera was worthless".

I am in absolute agreement with you on Jeter and Rivera.

[Mr. Happy]

I am in absolute agreement with you on Jeter and Rivera.

I agree with both of you. Without Jeter's hitting, that of his team mates and solid starting pitching, Rivera doesn't even get into the game. A pitcher, particularly a closer, can keep you in a game and can lose a game. However, it's damn hard-if not impossible-for a pitcher, qua pitcher, to actually win a game for a team. Someone has to get on base and score first.