Observations From a Week Off From the Astros

[Reuben]

As some of you know, I just went to the beach for 5 days and decided it would be a good time to take a break from the Astros. I realize many of you could probably post thoughts about a month or three (or 24) that you've taken off from the Astros, but for me, this was a fairly big deal. Last Thursday was an off day, then beginning Friday I didn't watch, check any MLB boxscores, news, anything, until this morning.

-I really didn't miss much, and I really didn't miss it that much.

-I hadn't even checked the schedule, but had I known they were about to play 4 games against the Rangers, that really would have made my decision easy. Ugh. Please tell me they at least bunted 4 or 5 times against Garza.

-Looks like it was more SAMO ("same ol' shit," for those not familiar with Basquiat) from the bullpen. Although somehow Chapman and Lo still have 0.00 career ERAs.

-Bummed to see WW got traded, er, sold. That sucks. Is fucking Brett Wallace now the longest-tenured Astro?

-Elmore. Man, what is it with the Astros and shitty-fielding backup SS? This guy must be averaging an error per game there. Bad range is one thing, but making ridiculous amounts of errors on top of that is just... bad.

-I think the best values in Monopoly are probably the light blue properties and the orange ones. You can whip out hotels on the light blues for chump change and start slowly bankrupting your opponents before they have a single house up. For the oranges, getting 3 houses up seems to me the best ROI; NY Ave will get you $800 every time.

-If you manage to somehow finish a whole game of Monopoly, do not, under any rainy circumstances, start a new game of Monopoly. Everyone will end up hating each other.

-Our dog Henry reallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreally likes chasing birds, particularly sandpipers, up and down the beach, at top speed, over and over and over again. He is an extremely fast dog. And he does not respond to us at all when he is chasing something.

-Two-game win streak, eh? I guess my re-engaging with the team might ruin that, but then again, they also had a four-game losing streak while I was away.

-Even though I'm "back", I'm really going to try not to get too invested in this team. It seems unhealthy to follow a truly abysmal team, and let it affect your general mood. I've got enough problems in my life. I love baseball, and I love the Astros, but their success is not my success, and their failure is not my failure. It can be hard to separate sometimes, though.

[Ebby Calvin]

-I think the best values in Monopoly are probably the light blue properties and the orange ones. You can whip out hotels on the light blues for chump change and start slowly bankrupting your opponents before they have a single house up. For the oranges, getting 3 houses up seems to me the best ROI; NY Ave will get you $800 every time.

-If you manage to somehow finish a whole game of Monopoly, do not, under any rainy circumstances, start a new game of Monopoly. Everyone will end up hating each other.

This is good advice.  Especially the second point.

[subnuclear]

The orange properties are excellent because the people coming out of the jail are likely to land on them. My brother-in-law pointed out that there is a limit of the number of houses that can be on the board, so if you build a huge number of houses on the cheap parts of the board (like the light blue and the purple) without building hotels, you can keep your opponents from building stuff.

[Mr. Happy]

The team's woes haven't gotten to me because I simply refuse to allow them to ruin my life. It's a conscious choice and decision. The way I see it: I'm been through 1975, 1991 and 2000 as well as the past few years and all of the insults (disastros, laugh-stros, lastros, etc.) and haven't buckled yet.

[Bench]

My brother-in-law pointed out that there is a limit of the number of houses that can be on the board, so if you build a huge number of houses on the cheap parts of the board (like the light blue and the purple) without building hotels, you can keep your opponents from building stuff.

We always use other markers to signify a house when we run out of houses to put on the board.  I didn't realize that was against the rules and the number of houses is a set limit.  That'll be an interesting point to whip out at the right time next time my family gets together and cause a mini-riot.

This is good advice.  Especially the second point.

That game really brings out a lot of bad blood.

[Limey]

We always use other markers to signify a house when we run out of houses to put on the board.  I didn't realize that was against the rules and the number of houses is a set limit.  That'll be an interesting point to whip out at the right time next time my family gets together and cause a mini-riot.

I never knew this either.  However, the official rules (per Wikipedia) are clear as mud to me:

The bank has a fixed supply of 32 houses and 12 hotels. If more players decide to build more houses at the same time than there are houses in the bank, the houses are auctioned off one at a time to the highest bidder. This rule favors the owners of expensive properties, for which the houses cost more in the first place, because the auction price of a house is not tied to the value of the property on which it will be placed. It is not possible to buy more houses than there is available in the bank. This could stop people buying hotels in the future!

The two emboldened phrases appear to be in direct conflict with each other.

[Limey]

I never knew this either.  However, the official rules (per Wikipedia) are clear as mud to me

Cleared up under the Strategy section:

If there is a shortage of houses, players should consider buying the last houses rather than buying hotels because each hotel built returns four houses to the bank for other players to use. When there are no houses in the bank, no one else can build houses. Also, players with hotels can't easily convert them to cash in this situation; they would have to strip an entire colour group of its hotels to raise money since buildings must be removed evenly from a colour group and because the hotels cannot be exchanged for houses since there are no houses in the bank. The owners of inexpensive monopolies should be particularly eager to use this tactic to prevent the owners of expensive monopolies from fully developing.

Occasionally, when there is a housing shortage, it can pay to tear down houses on one colour group to immediately build them on a different colour group. However, if another player declares an interest in buying the houses you have torn down, you will have to outbid that player for them, so this tactic pays off only when you are buying the torn down houses for expensive properties anyway, and you have much cash, and the other likely bidders are cash poor.

[sporadic]

That game really brings out a lot of bad blood.

My mother banned Monopoly when we were kids.  Then Checkers.  Then Chess.  Then Chutes and Ladders.  Then board games in general.  My brother and I (and to an extent dad) were waaaaaaaaay to competitive when it came to such activities, which is odd, as we rarely ever got into it playing sports.  Maybe it was because he was 5 years older than me so I had no chance to beat him at anything until I was about 14...and by that time we were as much friends as brothers so nobody got too pissed about anything.

[Duke]

My mother banned Monopoly when we were kids.  Then Checkers.  Then Chess.  Then Chutes and Ladders.  Then board games in general.  My brother and I (and to an extent dad) were waaaaaaaaay to competitive when it came to such activities, which is odd, as we rarely ever got into it playing sports.  Maybe it was because he was 5 years older than me so I had no chance to beat him at anything until I was about 14...and by that time we were as much friends as brothers so nobody got too pissed about anything.

the game that always got my family going at it was Hearts.  Dumping the Queen on my little brother would always do it.

[Bench]

My mother banned Monopoly when we were kids.  Then Checkers.  Then Chess.  Then Chutes and Ladders.  Then board games in general.  My brother and I (and to an extent dad) were waaaaaaaaay to competitive when it came to such activities, which is odd, as we rarely ever got into it playing sports.  Maybe it was because he was 5 years older than me so I had no chance to beat him at anything until I was about 14...and by that time we were as much friends as brothers so nobody got too pissed about anything.

My mother, a very sweet and compassionate lady, absolutely snapped at my 10 year old nephew on vacation this summer because he gave her the wrong amount of change when she had to pay him rent. 

[HudsonHawk]

I never knew this either.  However, the official rules (per Wikipedia) are clear as mud to me:


The two emboldened phrases appear to be in direct conflict with each other.

No, what it means is, if there is one house left, and two players want it, the banker auctions it off.

There are lots of other rules that people never seem to follow.  For example:

1) when a player lands on a space, he either has to purchase that property, or it's acutioned off to the highest bidder.  There is no such thing as simply passing on purchasing a property you land on.
2) you cannot have more than one hotel on a property
3) you must distribute houses evenly among your properties.  You can't put three houses on one red property and no houses on the others.
4) "Free Parking" is just that...you don't get any money for landing on it.

[Bench]

No, what it means is, if there is one house left, and two players want it, the banker auctions it off.

There are lots of other rules that people never seem to follow.  For example:

1) when a player lands on a space, he either has to purchase that property, or it's acutioned off to the highest bidder.  There is no such thing as simply passing on purchasing a property you land on.
2) you cannot have more than one hotel on a property
3) you must distribute houses evenly among your properties.  You can't put three houses on one red property and no houses on the others.
4) "Free Parking" is just that...you don't get any money for landing on it.

I've never played with anyone that deviated from those rules.  Those are pretty basic ones.

Have you played the "speed monopoly" version with that strange other dice that's in the box?  Wild.

[BudGirl]

My brother-in-laws used to refuse to play games with me and my sisters.  It's not so bad now, but I think that is because the nieces and nephews are the ones arguing now.

[MusicMan]

the game that always got my family going at it was Hearts.  Dumping the Queen on my little brother would always do it.

Then don't play Ups and Downs.  Also known as "Fuck Your Neighbor".

[Limey]

No, what it means is, if there is one house left, and two players want it, the banker auctions it off.

I don't recall ever playing a game where we ran out of houses, but it may have happened.  I've never seen houses auctioned off, so I'm guessing we didn't know that rule, or no one ever employed the tactic of monopolising houses.  It makes sense now.

There are lots of other rules that people never seem to follow.  For example:

1) when a player lands on a space, he either has to purchase that property, or it's acutioned off to the highest bidder.  There is no such thing as simply passing on purchasing a property you land on.
2) you cannot have more than one hotel on a property
3) you must distribute houses evenly among your properties.  You can't put three houses on one red property and no houses on the others.
4) "Free Parking" is just that...you don't get any money for landing on it.

I have always played those rules, with the exception that some people insist on having all fines etc. put into a pot for Free Parking.  I prefer not to have that variation.

also, is anyone else here shocked...shocked...that Hudson sticks to the rule book as written?!!

[HudsonHawk]

I've never played with anyone that deviated from those rules.  Those are pretty basic ones.

Have you played the "speed monopoly" version with that strange other dice that's in the box?  Wild.

Really?  I've never played with anyone who did.  Which is why we never finished a game.  They say an average game of 8 people should last about an hour.  Ours always ended when someone got up, kicked the board, threw the money in the air and stormed off.

[HudsonHawk]

also, is anyone else here shocked...shocked...that Hudson sticks to the rule book as written?!!

We didn't play by the rules.  We just made up shit.  I assumed everyone else did too, but turns out you guys are sticklers way more than I ever was.  

And the rule about 32 houses...we never followed it because it wasn't long after the box was first opened that we had only 6 or 8 houses total left.

[Limey]

Really?  I've never played with anyone who did.  Which is why we never finished a game.  They say an average game of 8 people should last about an hour.  Ours always ended when someone got up, kicked the board, through the money in the air and stormed off.

Regular games are quick if people trade.  If no one trades, it takes forever.

[Limey]

We didn't play by the rules.  We just made up shit.  I assumed everyone else did too, but turns out you guys are sticklers way more than I ever was.  

And the rule about 32 houses...we never followed it because it wasn't long after the box was first opened that we had only 6 or 8 houses total left.

Oops.  I took your original comment to be scornful of those who don't follow the rules as written.

[MusicMan]

They say an average game of 8 people should last about an hour. 

If we were to go by the book, as HH would, days would seem like hours.

[HudsonHawk]

If we were to go by the book, as HH would, days would seem like hours.

Perhaps you were too busy trying to think of mean-spirited, snide remarks to read all of what I posted.

[Jacksonian]

Perhaps you were too busy trying to think of mean-spirited, snide remarks to read all of what I posted.

Khaaaaannnn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[MusicMan]

Perhaps you were too busy trying to think of mean-spirited, snide remarks to read all of what I posted.

It was neither snide nor mean spirited.  I was comparing you to Lt. Saavik, the original target of the quote, who was also a stickler for the rules - while also pointing out that I have never heard of nor can I conceive of an 8-player Monopoly game ending in an hour.

[HudsonHawk]

It was neither snide nor mean spirited.  I was comparing you to Lt. Saavik, the original target of the quote, who was also a stickler for the rules - while also pointing out that I have never heard of nor can I conceive of an 8-player Monopoly game ending in an hour.

Again, if you were reading, rather than looking for ways to zing me, you would see that I was not a stickler for the rules. 

[Waldo]

I never knew this either.  However, the official rules (per Wikipedia) are clear as mud to me:


The two emboldened phrases appear to be in direct conflict with each other.

How is it possible to have 2+ players wanting to build houses/hotels at the same time?  I thought you could only build houses/hotels on your turn, thereby eliminating the "at the same time" scenario and leaving someone SOL.

[HudsonHawk]

How is it possible to have 2+ players wanting to build houses/hotels at the same time?  I thought you could only build houses/hotels on your turn, thereby eliminating the "at the same time" scenario and leaving someone SOL.

That's another made up rule.  You can buy houses and hotels at any time, not just during your turn.

[MusicMan]

Again, if you were reading, rather than looking for ways to zing me, you would see that I was not a stickler for the rules. 

Just insert a picture of Foghorn Leghorn here.

[Bench]

That's another made up rule.  You can buy houses and hotels at any time, not just during your turn.

Exactly.  Which makes distracting the banker from selling somebody houses right before you're about to roll through their territory an exciting part of the game.

[Bench]

The "new monopoly" game promises a thirty minute game play.  It also swaps out properties for corporate brands (Coca cola is the new Boardwalk), and just like the real world, abolishes the threat of jail for the corporate entities.

[NeilT]

There is one thing that I've found incredibly compelling about this season.  It has amazed me that these guys go out night after night and play with intensity and I think as much skill as they can  muster.  It's one thing for me to joke about 7 innings of good baseball before the game's blown, but these guys have lived that, and I think they've been a class act.  I don't know who on this Astros team will still be playing in five years, and I don't know where they will be playing, but I bet they'll be some of the best clubhouse guys to ever play the game. 

Back to Monopoly rules now.

[JimR]

There is one thing that I've found incredibly compelling about this season.  It has amazed me that these guys go out night after night and play with intensity and I think as much skill as they can  muster.  It's one thing for me to joke about 7 innings of good baseball before the game's blown, but these guys have lived that, and I think they've been a class act.  I don't know who on this Astros team will still be playing in five years, and I don't know where they will be playing, but I bet they'll be some of the best clubhouse guys to ever play the game. 

Back to Monopoly rules now.

I totally agree and think that the season is far from a disaster.

[Ebby Calvin]

There is one thing that I've found incredibly compelling about this season.  It has amazed me that these guys go out night after night and play with intensity and I think as much skill as they can  muster.  It's one thing for me to joke about 7 innings of good baseball before the game's blown, but these guys have lived that, and I think they've been a class act.  I don't know who on this Astros team will still be playing in five years, and I don't know where they will be playing, but I bet they'll be some of the best clubhouse guys to ever play the game. 

Back to Monopoly rules now.

I agree 100%.

[GreatBagwellsBeard]

There is one thing that I've found incredibly compelling about this season.  It has amazed me that these guys go out night after night and play with intensity and I think as much skill as they can  muster.  It's one thing for me to joke about 7 innings of good baseball before the game's blown, but these guys have lived that, and I think they've been a class act.  I don't know who on this Astros team will still be playing in five years, and I don't know where they will be playing, but I bet they'll be some of the best clubhouse guys to ever play the game. 

Back to Monopoly rules now.

Post of the season.  Seriously.

[HudsonHawk]

There is one thing that I've found incredibly compelling about this season.  It has amazed me that these guys go out night after night and play with intensity and I think as much skill as they can  muster.  It's one thing for me to joke about 7 innings of good baseball before the game's blown, but these guys have lived that, and I think they've been a class act.  I don't know who on this Astros team will still be playing in five years, and I don't know where they will be playing, but I bet they'll be some of the best clubhouse guys to ever play the game. 

Back to Monopoly rules now.

Makes a fellow proud to be an Astro...

[Mr. Happy]

There is one thing that I've found incredibly compelling about this season.  It has amazed me that these guys go out night after night and play with intensity and I think as much skill as they can  muster.  It's one thing for me to joke about 7 innings of good baseball before the game's blown, but these guys have lived that, and I think they've been a class act.  I don't know who on this Astros team will still be playing in five years, and I don't know where they will be playing, but I bet they'll be some of the best clubhouse guys to ever play the game. 

Back to Monopoly rules now.

You have lurched into the truth, counselor, and I absolutely agree. I played on some really bad teams, and nerves were frayed with the internal bickering back and forth between pitchers (the good guys) and the villains (hitters and fielders) by season's end.

[Bench]

Post of the season.  Seriously.

Hear hear.

[subnuclear]

There is one thing that I've found incredibly compelling about this season.  It has amazed me that these guys go out night after night and play with intensity and I think as much skill as they can  muster.  It's one thing for me to joke about 7 innings of good baseball before the game's blown, but these guys have lived that, and I think they've been a class act.  I don't know who on this Astros team will still be playing in five years, and I don't know where they will be playing, but I bet they'll be some of the best clubhouse guys to ever play the game. 

This goes for Bo Porter, too. Maybe all those signs in the hallway work.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

There is one thing that I've found incredibly compelling about this season.  It has amazed me that these guys go out night after night and play with intensity and I think as much skill as they can  muster.  It's one thing for me to joke about 7 innings of good baseball before the game's blown, but these guys have lived that, and I think they've been a class act.  I don't know who on this Astros team will still be playing in five years, and I don't know where they will be playing, but I bet they'll be some of the best clubhouse guys to ever play the game. 

It may not be as much fun as winning but it beats the hell out of digging ditches for a living. MLB minimum salary is $480,000.