Padres @ Astros 06/27/12

[Mr. Happy]

I realize that I'm late, but here are your lineups (was in SFO most of the afternoon running errands, including hitting the Polish delicatessen for a load of Polish food to bring home for the freezer):

Padres
RFWill Venable
SSEverth Cabrera
3BChase Headley
LFCarlos Quentin
1BYonder Alonso
2BLogan Forsythe
CFCameron Maybin
CNick Hundley
PClayton Richard

Astros

RF Brian Bixler 
SS Jed Lowrie 
1B Carlos Lee 
LF J.D. Martinez 
3B Chris Johnson 
C Chris Snyder 
2B Matt Downs 
CF Jordan Schafer 
P Lucas Harrell 
SD: Clayton Richard (5-7, 3.95)

[strosrays]

Thank you just for being here.

[Mr. Happy]

You're welcome. Thank you for being here too.

[strosrays]

I weighed my options carefully.

[Mr. Happy]

JD stays hot and leads off with a sharp single.

[Mr. Happy]

I weighed my options carefully.

I'm glad that we rated high enough.

[Fredia]

yeaa the master is here...

[Mr. Happy]

0-0 Top 3

[strosrays]

I know the Astros lineup is not exactly Murderer's Row, but this Padre batting order is pretty suck-ass.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

United Airlines is proud to fly the Houston Astros.

[Mr. Happy]

I know the Astros lineup is not exactly Murderer's Row, but this Padre batting order is pretty suck-ass.

It is pretty putrid. Bud Black is probably a lame duck waiting for a new GM under new ownership.

[strosrays]

It is pretty putrid. Bud Black is probably a lame duck waiting for a new GM under new ownership.

Probably so.

Standing in line at the grocery store this evening, naturally enough I began to peruse the headlines on all the National Enquirer-type mags on the rack by the checkout. Apparently, Kim Kardashian allegedly said that most of her fans are "imbeciles and idiots." A brief flash of insight, there.

[Mr. Happy]

Downs with a no doubter. 1-0

[strosrays]

He hit that profoundly deep.

[Bench]

Way to go Trig!

[Mr. Happy]

Joedan with the cliche fake bunt attempt on the first pitch. I'm so tired of that shit.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Matt Downs sighting.

[Mr. Happy]

Probably so.

Standing in line at the grocery store this evening, naturally enough I began to peruse the headlines on all the National Enquirer-type mags on the rack by the checkout. Apparently, Kim Kardashian allegedly said that most of her fans are "imbeciles and idiots." A brief flash of insight, there.

KIM K's fans deserve her.

[Mr. Happy]

1-0 Top 4

[strosrays]

Do the Astros enforce the rules if people move to different seats when the park is 1/3 full or less, like tonight (and most nights)?

It seems to me you could buy a bleacher ticket and then sit pretty much wherever you wanted.

[strosrays]

KIM K's fans deserve her.

She's a serious, many-faceted girl who just got flummoxed by all the media attention.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

I love Harrell's pace.

[austro]

Probably so.

Standing in line at the grocery store this evening, naturally enough I began to peruse the headlines headlights on all the National Enquirer-type mags racks on the rack mags by the checkout.

FIFY. It's my attempt at getting ignored.

[jbm]

Do the Astros enforce the rules if people move to different seats when the park is 1/3 full or less, like tonight (and most nights)?

It seems to me you could buy a bleacher ticket and then sit pretty much wherever you wanted.

My friend said he bought a cheap one and went and sat behind the third base dugout for one of the Royals games.

[strosrays]

FIFY. It's my attempt at getting ignored.

Actually, divergent thought processes* are probably the norm while watching the Astros this season.

*Thinking about tits

[Mr. Happy]

Don't make a mess, young man.

[austro]

Don't make a mess, young man.

Rescued.

[Mr. Happy]

Did everyone hear that Pettitte broke his leg on a batted ball?

[Mr. Happy]

I love Harrell's pace.

I do too. He's intense out thee. That's the way that I like them to be.

[austro]

Did everyone hear that Pettitte broke his leg on a batted ball?

Yeah, less than 24 hrs after Sabathia hit the DL. Couldn't happen to a finer team.

[Mr. Happy]

Richard looks very good tonight. Harrell better stay on his game.

[Ron Brand]

DoRay give my brain St. Vitus's dance.

[Mr. Happy]

1-0 Top 5

[strosrays]

If one develops a crack in one's water pipe, will Flex Seal™ fix it?

I watched the entire infomercial, and they never really addressed this.

[Ron Brand]

I don't begrudge Sabathia anything but Andy can go fuck himself.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

If Kim Kardashian was a major league pitcher, she'd get hammered.

[Ron Brand]

Bixler flashing the marble glove in OF.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Are those suite tickets or sweet tickets?!?!? Fuckin' DoRay.

[strosrays]

Wow, this looks like the beginning of something that might really suck.

[pots]

The defense is testing Harrell

[moriartp]

Way to go Trig!

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[Mr. Happy]

Whew! 1-0 Bottom 5

[Mr. Happy]

She's a serious, many-faceted girl who just got flummoxed by all the media attention.

Maybe so, but anyone who agrees to do a reality show gets what was coming to them.

[Mr. Happy]

Anybody know what the real status of Altuve is, other than day-to-day?

[BudGirl]

Do the Astros enforce the rules if people move to different seats when the park is 1/3 full or less, like tonight (and most nights)?

It seems to me you could buy a bleacher ticket and then sit pretty much wherever you wanted.

Yes and no.  If you get down to the seats before they have the usher there, no.  If you get there after the usher is there, yes.  If you start at section 133 and work your way to section 125, no.  After a couple innings they seem to stop checking tickets, just try and prevent people going down when the batter is waiting for a pitch.

[BudGirl]

Maybe so, but anyone who agrees to do a reality show gets what was coming to them.

millions of dollars?

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

DoRay invokes the name of Mike Schmidt for no reason when discussing the Mets vs Cubs. The guys are idiots at their worst when their together.

[Mr. Happy]

LUCKY FOR Richard that Snyder runs like I do.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

I have to run slow, so I don't pull a hammy.

[Mr. Happy]

millions of dollars?

Besides that. She bitches about the press and paparazzi, but she'd be nothing without them.

[BudGirl]

Besides that. She bitches about the press and paparazzi, but she'd be nothing without them.

she also gets to have sex with famous black men.

[Mr. Happy]

she also gets to have sex with famous black men.

She has that going for her.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

she also gets to have sex with famous black men.

She's a ball player, but a lefty or righty?

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Astros coming to bat in the 6th leading 1 to nothing.

[BudGirl]

She's a ball player, but a lefty or righty?

maybe she can double dribble?

[Andyzipp]

It's shocking, but Schafer showed bunt on the first pitch in the bottom of the 6th

[Ron Brand]

One of these days he's going to really bunt one and it's going to blow everyone's mind.

[Mr. Happy]

It's shocking, but Schafer showed bunt on the first pitch in the bottom of the 6th

He did that in his first AB. I've just about seen enough of him.

[pots]

These guys are flying through this game.  6 innings in the book, 1 hour and 15 minutes

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Richards works fast too. This game is barely an hour and 10 minutes old and it's the top fo the 7th inning.

[Andyzipp]

Bogey in as a defensive replacement...?

[pots]

Bogey in as a defensive replacement...?

Did you miss the soft fly out err base hit that Bixler went back on first?

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Bogey in as a defensive replacement...?

Yes.

[Mr. Happy]

Good defensive substitution, Millsie.

[Andyzipp]

I did.  Three kids at the game with me.  Either way, Bogey just made a nice catch at the wall

[Mr. Happy]

Harrell is pretty  good tonight. We need to scratch out some runs.

[pots]

Good defensive substitution, Millsie.

Scary lucky there.  If Bixler doesn't get that, it's a tie score and a runner in scoring position with no one out.  Instead of one done and a runner on first

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Nick Hundley is not related to Todd and Randy, but he's still a catcher. Something about the name?

[Mr. Happy]

Scary lucky there.  If Bixler doesn't get that, it's a tie score and a runner in scoring position with no one out.  Instead of one done and a runner on first

It was Bogusevic, who just came in to the game.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Milo in the booth is still a lot better than just having the DoRay twins all alone.

[Mr. Happy]

1-0 Top 8 A nailbiter.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

It was Bogusevic, who just came in to the game.

I think he knows that, was just describing a potential bad scenario if the the change had not been made.

[Ron Brand]

Milo in the booth is still a lot better than just having the DoRay twins all alone.

Yes indeed.

[austro]

Yes indeed.

It's just too bad that they put a microphone in the booth with him.

[Andyzipp]

Nice job of Lee overcoming his midsection to make the play at 1st.

[chuck]

Trig Schreefer sounds like the motorcycle riding next door neighbor of Jack Sutherford.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

I would sing that fucked up state farm jingle if it would produce some insurance runs.

[Mr. Happy]

I run Harrelll back out there for the ninth. Myers has been off the last few times out.

[BudGirl]

i think it all depends on his pitch count

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Trig Schreefer sounds like the motorcycle riding next door neighbor of Jack Sutherford.

Vest leather. Cigarette hanging from lip. Ponytail.

[BizidyDizidy]

I'm at Salumeria Rosi sitting next to a drunk 60 year old woman who is 15 minutes into a racist rant about the "blacks, muslims, and Filipinos". Mexicans are okay though

[NeilT]

No one hustles like Carlos Lee.

[chuck]

Vest leather. Cigarette hanging from lip. Ponytail.

Ponytail. Absolutely. I can just imagine his profile picture on match.com.

[Mr. Happy]

Lincecum with a bounce back start today, shutting out the Dodgers for seven innings.

[BizidyDizidy]

Earlier she was talking about who she has cut out of her will

[chuck]

I'm at Salumeria Rosi sitting next to a drunk 60 year old woman who is 15 minutes into a racist rant about the "blacks, muslims, and Filipinos". Mexicans are okay though

Dammit, I'm sorry. I'll call Mom and tell her to get a taxi and go home.

[BudGirl]

so, who really thinks mills will let harrell finish this game?

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Earlier she was talking about who she has cut out of her will

Tell her to shut the hell up, the Astros are playing the Padres. She should understand. Priorities.

[austro]

so, who really thinks mills will let harrell finish this game?

You all don't understand the trump card here: I started Harrell for my fantacrap team. He's doomed.

[chuck]

I used to take out of town business guests to the bar at the Irridium which I believe is a block or so away from where you are. In those days the place featured a particularly game bartendress.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

You all don't understand the trump card here: I started Harrell for my fantacrap team. He's doomed.

Son. Of. A. Bitch.

[BizidyDizidy]

She can't  find a worthwhile maid -the blacks steal and the Filipinos don't know how to do anything

[Mr. Happy]

Come on, Harrell.

[BizidyDizidy]

That would've been right up my alley two kids ago

Where did you live?

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Harrell needs a double play man.

[hostros7]

I used to take out of town business guests to the bar at the Irridium which I believe is a block or so away from where you are. In those days the place featured a particularly game bartendress.

For the avoidance of ambiguity, please elaborate on "game."

[Mr. Happy]

so, who really thinks mills will let harrell finish this game?

I'll eat my Astros hat if the Angel of Doom comes in.

[chuck]

That would've been right up my alley two kids ago

Where did you live?

I lived in pre-hipster Williamsburg. There was a hipster contingent on the north side but nothing really on the south side. I lived on Driggs at South 2nd. I had a full floor railroad for which I paid $600 if that tells you anything about how the nabe was back then.

[chuck]

For the avoidance of ambiguity, please elaborate on "game."

She had a firm grasp on the concept of service.

[Mr. Happy]

Come on out, Red Ass.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

She can't  find a worthwhile maid -the blacks steal and the Filipinos don't know how to do anything

Really, tell her to leave you alone. Be kind of nice the first time. Say it politely. Baseball.

[BizidyDizidy]

How long ago

[hostros7]

She can't  find a worthwhile maid -the blacks steal and the Filipinos don't know how to do anything

She must be drunk because she has those generalizations reversed.  Also, she must not have much of a will because I thought ivy liberal arts majors and former ussr 20somthings made up 83 percent of the domestic help workforce for manhattanite people of means

[Mr. Happy]

Whew!!!

[BudGirl]

yikes

[chuck]

How long ago

I moved there in '95 I think.

[Mr. Happy]

Fuck you, Kotsay. That was a strike

[hostros7]

Walking distance to luger

[BudGirl]

goodness gracious

[chuck]

ivy liberal arts majors

Don't know how to do anything.

former ussr 20somthings

Steal.

[hostros7]

Fuck, what a squeeze job

[Mr. Happy]

Torture.

[chuck]

Walking distance to luger

Yes, very close.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Sheeeeiiiiiiiiitttt.

[strosrays]

I applaud Mills for leaving Harrell in, come what may.

[BizidyDizidy]

The Filipino maid didn't know how to do laundry, said she had a maid in the Philippines

[moriartp]

Shutout!

[hostros7]

That was fun

[Mr. Happy]

1-0 Whitewashing BALLGAME

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Yipeee!

[BudGirl]

awesome!!!

[Mr. Happy]

1:57 on your game time.

[chuck]

That's by far my favorite type of game.

[Aussie Astro]

This is the first game this season I have got to watch every pitch, very nice.

[pots]

That was fun.  Astros win!!

[BizidyDizidy]

2 hours good amount of time for a ball game

[Mr. Happy]

That's by far my favorite type of game.

Mine too. Good pace. Good pitching.

[austro]

I never thought they were going to get that guy at the plate. I had visions of the win, not just the shutout, disappearing down the drain.

[pots]

1:57 on your game time.

according to mlb.com the fastest game this year. 

ETA: If you missed the game, check out the vidoe clips on mlb.com.  That guy was hauling around third.  Great play to get him.  Lee's play is pretty funny.

[ybbodeus]

You know what I was thinkin'? That was really great!

[Mr. Happy]

I never thought they were going to get that guy at the plate. I had visions of the win, not just the shutout, disappearing down the drain.

I didn't think that JD had a real shot. I'm so glad that I was wrong.

[moriartp]

Watching the postgame interviews and HOLY SHIT, JD MARTINEZ'S CANINES ARE HUGE.

[Mr. Happy]

Watching the postgame interviews and HOLY SHIT, JD MARTINEZ'S CANINES ARE HUGE.

I wish that I could have saeen them, but mlb extra innings package only shows the ballgame.