Your Life in Steve Jobs' Hands

[Limey]

United Airlines to scrap paper charts and manuals, replacing them with iPads.

[Lurch]

Shame they must remain off during takeoff and landing

[VirtualBob]

They already scrapped customer service ... good to see they are continuing to make progress on the merger.  Lots of newly painted planes, too, which I am planning to view out the window of their competitors' planes if they keep moving this direction.
[/sour]

[drew corleone]

Her life was in your hands, Dude.

[MusicMan]

The hell with that... when do I get my iPhone 5?

[Limey]

The hell with that... when do I get my iPhone 5?

End of September

[Limey]

They already scrapped customer service ... good to see they are continuing to make progress on the merger.  Lots of newly painted planes, too, which I am planning to view out the window of their competitors' planes if they keep moving this direction.
[/sour]

It was simply gobsmacking how much worse Continental got after the merger.  They were pretty shoddy, but United took them down to a whole new world of suck.  I'm off to London shortly...on BA.

[JimR]

just flew United to Moscow. it was great.

[Navin R Johnson]

Been flying CO for about 7 years now, I was really pissed about the merger.  Now every flight is about 40% "elite."  The only thing I like so far is Economy plus.  Maybe it is just the routes I am taking, but their prices out of IAH seemed to have gone through the roof.

For example, have to go to NYC next week.  CO/UA price, $1200.  Thus I am stuck taking US Airways for $315.  At least I get miles....

[Bench]

Now every flight is about 40% "elite." 

I noticed that this weekend.  As an elitist, I still had to wait for a variety of "Star Gold" and other frequent flyer levels I never heard of before.  Nearly half the plane was full before they gave the rabble the green light.

Likewise the special "elite" line to get through security at IAH was no shorter than the "regular" line. 

[Navin R Johnson]

Terminal C check-in got upgraded so much that they forgot how to work the TSA lines.   It seems like it is twice as long since they polished up the lobby.

[Lurch]

Samsung cites 2001: A Space Odyssey to prove Apple didnt invent the iPod form factor

[Arky Vaughan]

Terminal C check-in got upgraded so much that they forgot how to work the TSA lines.   It seems like it is twice as long since they polished up the lobby.

The last time I flew out of Terminal C on a Monday morning, security on both the Elite and non-Elite sides was a nightmare. What was really pleasing is that TSA only had half the lanes open with 200 people in line. I guess they only open all the lanes when it's really crowded.

[Arky Vaughan]

They already scrapped customer service ... good to see they are continuing to make progress on the merger.  Lots of newly painted planes, too, which I am planning to view out the window of their competitors' planes if they keep moving this direction.[/sour]

I like how Smisek uses "we've repainted hundreds of planes" to tell passengers how much progress they've made on the merger. That's small comfort when your reservations and check-in got botched because they're still figuring out how to fly a combined system. Putting Smisek in front of a camera is a terrible idea.

[HudsonHawk]

I noticed that this weekend.  As an elitist, I still had to wait for a variety of "Star Gold" and other frequent flyer levels I never heard of before.  Nearly half the plane was full before they gave the rabble the green light.

Likewise the special "elite" line to get through security at IAH was no shorter than the "regular" line. 

Ah...suffering through the airport with the hoi polloi.  Madness.

[HudsonHawk]

I like how Smisek uses "we've repainted hundreds of planes" to tell passengers how much progress they've made on the merger. That's small comfort when your reservations and check-in got botched because they're still figuring out how to fly a combined system. Putting Smisek in front of a camera is a terrible idea.

Continental was hands down, the Worst.  Airline.  Ever. before the merger.  I think it getting worse is just your imagination.

[Guinness]

Samsung cites 2001: A Space Odyssey to prove Apple didnt invent the iPod form factor

Heck, they've had them on Star Trek for decades...

[MusicMan]

Continental was hands down, the Worst.  Airline.  Ever. before the merger.  I think it getting worse is just your imagination.

Continental was far from the worst.  Fly American much?

[JimR]

Continental was hands down, the Worst.  Airline.  Ever. before the merger.  I think it getting worse is just your imagination.

all in the eyes of the beholder. my scout friend who files a million miles during the season says Continental is the best.

[Bench]

Continental was hands down, the Worst.  Airline.  Ever. before the merger.  I think it getting worse is just your imagination.

The is the opposite of true. 

[Navin R Johnson]

I loved CO too, never had any real problems.

[HudsonHawk]

all in the eyes of the beholder. my scout friend who files a million miles during the season says Continental is the best.

I don't fly a million miles, but I fly three or four times a month.  I cannot stand Continental.  But, everyone's mileage may vary.  Personally, I fly Southwest when I can (and when I can't fly on the corporate jet).

[MusicMan]

I don't fly a million miles, but I fly three or four times a month.  I cannot stand Continental.  But, everyone's mileage may vary.  Personally, I fly Southwest when I can (and when I can't fly on the corporate jet).

You're flying within Texas, right?

Continental Express is a very different experience than Continental.

[Ty in Tampa]

I don't fly a million miles, but I fly three or four times a month.  I cannot stand Continental.  But, everyone's mileage may vary.  Personally, I fly Southwest when I can (and when I can't fly on the corporate jet).

Southwest is the official carrier of Ty in Tampa.

[HudsonHawk]

You're flying within Texas, right?

Continental Express is a very different experience than Continental.

Not usually.  I mostly fly SWA whenever I have to fly within Texas, CO to most places outside, though I have to fly CO Express to Colorado when I can't get a private ride.

[Limey]

all in the eyes of the beholder. my scout friend who files a million miles during the season says Continental is the best.

I rarely had a problem with CO, until the merger. Since then, they've turned to shit at a speed I didn't think possible.

[hostros7]

I rarely had a problem with CO, until the merger. Since then, they've turned to shit at a speed I didn't think possible.

Agree with this completely.  I have not left on time since the merger.  Delaying a flight for over an hour because the flight attendant slept in and was late to work is a capital offense.

[Limey]

Continental Express is a very different experience than Continental.

I flew to Colorado recently, on a Dash 8 run on a CO code share.  Terminal A was a joy, boarding took 5 mins, the flight left on time and arrived 20 minutes early.  If only all flights could be like this.

[Bench]

I rarely had a problem with CO, until the merger. Since then, they've turned to shit at a speed I didn't think possible.

Ditto.

[MusicMan]

Delaying a flight for over an hour because the flight attendant slept in and was late to work is a capital offense.

No.  That did not seriously happen.

[BizidyDizidy]

No.  That did not seriously happen.

I had a continental express flight where we were delayed two hours or so and finally the gate agent got on and explained - "The pilot thinks there is something wrong with the plane - maintenance has checked it and thinks it is fine. The pilot refuses to fly this plane, so as soon as we get a new pilot here, we will be on our way."

[Navin R Johnson]

I flew to Colorado recently, on a Dash 8 run on a CO code share.  Terminal A was a joy, boarding took 5 mins, the flight left on time and arrived 20 minutes early.  If only all flights could be like this.

Terminal A at IAH?  I have had to take several US Airways flights recently that took off out of there and the TSA line has always been bad to awful.  Most recent trip it took almost 40 minutes because I guess everyone was on a lunch break and they had one lane open.  Maybe it was just bad luck though.  Now the terminal parking at A is fantastic, open spaces everywhere.

[MusicMan]

I had a continental express flight where we were delayed two hours or so and finally the gate agent got on and explained - "The pilot thinks there is something wrong with the plane - maintenance has checked it and thinks it is fine. The pilot refuses to fly this plane, so as soon as we get a new pilot here, we will be on our way."

That's a hell of a lot more acceptable.

[HudsonHawk]

I was once on a flight from Reno to Houston (on CO, of course), and we were all boarded and ready to take off.  The flight attendant gets on the PA and says "we cannot take off until five people get off the plane".  When asked if they were overbooked, she said no, they have empty seats, but they didn't have enough fuel to get to Houston, so they had to lighten the load.  When asked why they couldn't get more fuel, she said "we're full of fuel, but this plane cannot fly all the way from Reno to Houston full of passengers."  When asked why CO would book a flight on a plane they knew was incapable of that distance she said "we cannot take off until five people get off the plane."

[BizidyDizidy]

That's a hell of a lot more acceptable.

I was pretty shocked they would tell people the pilot who had just flown the plane there thought it was unsafe to fly. I did not fly on it, but I guess I would've heard if it had crashed.

[Bench]

That's a hell of a lot more acceptable.

I think you missed the punchline.

[geezerdonk]

I had a continental express flight where we were delayed two hours or so and finally the gate agent got on and explained - "The pilot thinks there is something wrong with the plane - maintenance has checked it and thinks it is fine. The pilot refuses to fly this plane, so as soon as we get a new pilot here, we will be on our way."

This is the pilot you want every time you fly. The pilot is on the plane; the mechanic stays behind. Who has more at stake in the decision? 

[BizidyDizidy]

This is the pilot you want every time you fly. The pilot is on the plane; the mechanic stays behind. Who has more at stake in the decision? 

It was amazing - as soon as they made that announcement I switched to a southwest flight.

[HudsonHawk]

This is the pilot you want every time you fly. The pilot is on the plane; the mechanic stays behind. Who has more at stake in the decision? 

It was my understanding that the pilot is the sole judge as to whether or not the plane is air worthy.  That a pilot can ground his scheduled flight for any reason.  Perhaps not.

[geezerdonk]

I was pretty shocked they would tell people the pilot who had just flown the plane there thought it was unsafe to fly.

It is not uncommon for a mechanical problem to occur during flight. In other words the plane was sound when it left its last stop but during post flight, a new (or previously undiscovered) problem is found. It isn't necessarily that the plane was unsafe; maybe just not as safe as it could be.

[BizidyDizidy]

It is not uncommon for a mechanical problem to occur during flight. In other words the plane was sound when it left its last stop but during post flight, a new (or previously undiscovered) problem is found. It isn't necessarily that the plane was unsafe; maybe just not as safe as it could be.

He wasn't willing to make the next flight though, which was the point.

[Limey]

It is not uncommon for a mechanical problem to occur during flight. In other words the plane was sound when it left its last stop but during post flight, a new (or previously undiscovered) problem is found. It isn't necessarily that the plane was unsafe; maybe just not as safe as it could be.

Flying back from Mexico City, we were on finals into IAH when I felt the thrust of the engines and we started to level off, then climb.  I said to my colleague "we're going around again."  The announcement came that we were not yet going to land, as they did not get "three greens" on the undercarriage indicator lights.  Yikes!  A few minutes later, the co-pilot came on to "reassure" everyone that he changed the bulb on the non-green light, and now it was green so we were going to proceed with landing.

Softest landing I've ever experienced.  Quietest too, until we were all convinced that we had three sets of wheels under us, at which point there was a collective exhaling.

[MusicMan]

Hearing an engine go out during take off is a sub-par experience.

[MRaup]

Hearing an engine go out during take off is a sub-par experience.

When flying in to Denver on a Pioneer flight a while back, the pilot forgot to turn off the intercom right away after making his about to land announcement. After hearing the landing gear being put down, the pilot distinctly said "whoops!" in a kind of 'ha-ha I fucked up' kind of way before a heads-up stewardess hit her intercom to drown him out.

Needless to say, it was a tense few minutes coming in to land.

[Ty in Tampa]

It was amazing - as soon as they made that announcement I switched to a southwest flight.

I would have been right there with you. How many other people got off the plane?

[BizidyDizidy]

I would have been right there with you. How many other people got off the plane?

Seemed like quite a few left - luckily it was work so I just called up the travel department and it was pretty painless.

[JimR]

I would have been right there with you. How many other people got off the plane?

if the pilot won't go, neither will i.

[Ebby Calvin]

if the pilot won't go, neither will i.

My mom was a Delta flight attendant for 35 years (retired shortly after 9/11).  Despite all the shit she talked about pilots in general, this was the one thing she wouldn't budge on.

Since I flew Delta free for the first 23 years of my life, I'm only a decade or so into "commercial" air travel.  In my opinion, they all suck.  Just different degrees of suck.

[JimR]

My mom was a Delta flight attendant for 35 years (retired shortly after 9/11).  Despite all the shit she talked about pilots in general, this was the one thing she wouldn't budge on.

Since I flew Delta free for the first 23 years of my life, I'm only a decade or so into "commercial" air travel.  In my opinion, they all suck.  Just different degrees of suck.

my uncle was an airline executive for 40 years or more and at WWII fighter pilot. that was his rule: i'm with the pilot.

[VirtualBob]

Continental was hands down, the Worst.  Airline.  Ever. before the merger.  I think it getting worse is just your imagination.

Wrong -- After 3 million miles on American I switched to Continental 3 yeas ago and it was WONDERful by comparison.  Am on target for a million miles on CO/UA by the end of 2012, but at the rate they are sucking I may give up.  The fact that I am even considering moving back to American shocks me.

[VirtualBob]

I rarely had a problem with CO, until the merger. Since then, they've turned to shit at a speed I didn't think possible.

Exactly. My. Experience.

[HudsonHawk]

Wrong -- After 3 million miles on American I switched to Continental 3 yeas ago and it was WONDERful by comparison.  Am on target for a million miles on CO/UA by the end of 2012, but at the rate they are sucking I may give up.  The fact that I am even considering moving back to American shocks me.

If CO is the best you got, I cannot imagine the ass raping you get from everyone else. 

[JimR]

Exactly. My. Experience.

i guess i do not fly enough to recognize suck. i have had positive experiences with UA.

[Limey]

i guess i do not fly enough to recognize suck. i have had positive experiences with UA.

Since the UA take-over, I have had nothing but aggravation.  Terrible check-in experiences, despite doing as much in advance as possible; fucked up seat assignments because of changing equipment and just because of [shrug]; stripped down service; and ridiculous pricing for in-flight food that used to be free and is now MMPUS cost* without the quality.

* I'm already paying for my share of the fuel it takes to carry the food on the flight, so it adds insult to indigestion to try to make me pay $7 for cheese and crackers because I'm on a plane.  I won't, but some people connecting or traveling with kids won't have that choice.  I've already paid the location cost, so charge me what it's worth...nothing.  Oh, and don't get me started on six-fiddy for a Miller Lite....

[HudsonHawk]

Oh, and don't get me started on six-fiddy for a Miller Lite....

Anyone who drinks Miller Lite deserves to be insulted.

[BizidyDizidy]

Since the UA take-over, I have had nothing but aggravation.  Terrible check-in experiences, despite doing as much in advance as possible; fucked up seat assignments because of changing equipment and just because of [shrug]; stripped down service; and ridiculous pricing for in-flight food that used to be free and is now MMPUS cost* without the quality.

* I'm already paying for my share of the fuel it takes to carry the food on the flight, so it adds insult to indigestion to try to make me pay $7 for cheese and crackers because I'm on a plane.  I won't, but some people connecting or traveling with kids won't have that choice.  I've already paid the location cost, so charge me what it's worth...nothing.  Oh, and don't get me started on six-fiddy for a Miller Lite....

As a socia-communist, you may be surprised to learn that in America the cost of things need not be tied to their cost of production.

[Limey]

As a socia-communist, you may be surprised to learn that in America the cost of things need not be tied to their cost of production.

Right.  But free to 15x production value is quite a jump.  Instead of that, I'd rather they go "full Southwest", leave the snacks on the ground and save the fuel.

[chuck]

Right.  But free to 15x production value is quite a jump.  Instead of that, I'd rather they go "full Southwest", leave the snacks on the ground and save the fuel.

I say they should charge a fat fucker premium. Who cares about a couple of packets of peanuts when the guy next to me clocks in at 350?

[Bench]

Since the UA take-over, I have had nothing but aggravation.  Terrible check-in experiences, despite doing as much in advance as possible; fucked up seat assignments because of changing equipment and just because of [shrug]; stripped down service; and ridiculous pricing for in-flight food that used to be free and is now MMPUS cost* without the quality.

We had a direct flight from Boston to Houston on Sunday.  Checked the luggage in at Logan about 1:45 before the flight.  Only one bag made it to Houston. 

[BizidyDizidy]

I say they should charge a fat fucker premium. Who cares about a couple of packets of peanuts when the guy next to me clocks in at 350?

Despite being a fat fucker myself, I would be okay with this if it meant the tickets for my wife and son were dirt cheap.

[chuck]

We had a direct flight from Boston to Houston on Sunday.  Checked the luggage in at Logan about 1:45 before the flight.  Only one bag made it to Houston. 

I once flew from Miami to Houston. I got there two hours before the flight and the flight was delayed three hours. My bag somehow did not make it onto the flight. Not enough time to root through all my shit for items of value or interest, apparently.

If you guys want to have some real fun with airport and airline aggravation move to Miami.

[BudGirl]

I rarely travel via airplane, but when I do, I prefer Southwest.

The thing I hate is charging for luggage.  Just add it to the ticket price.  I've been fortunate that I've never had luggage lost/stolen.  I guess they realize there isn't anything of value in there.  Unless I'm bringing booze back but even then good experiences.

If I'm that hungry before a flight, I'll pick something up on the concourse, should be better than what I'd get on the plane.

[HudsonHawk]

I say they should charge a fat fucker premium. Who cares about a couple of packets of peanuts when the guy next to me clocks in at 350?

There should also be an IQ test.  To fly SWA, you should have to demonstrate that you can count to 30.  Of course, that would halve their customer base.

[HudsonHawk]

The thing I hate is charging for luggage.  Just add it to the ticket price.

They should charge for carry-ons.  Not only that, if you bring shit onto the plane, it sits in your lap.  Carry-on luggage is responsible for more flight delays than all of the fat fuckers, mechanical problems, overslept flight attendants and drunk pilots combined.

[Bench]

If you guys want to have some real fun with airport and airline aggravation move to Miami.

That airport is a third world country. 

[geezerdonk]

Who cares about a couple of packets of peanuts when the guy next to me clocks in at 350?

How is Carlos as a travel companion?

[BudGirl]

They should charge for carry-ons.  Not only that, if you bring shit onto the plane, it sits in your lap.  Carry-on luggage is responsible for more flight delays than all of the fat fuckers, mechanical problems, overslept flight attendants and drunk pilots combined.

+1  I check just to not have to deal with that shit.  Plus, I hate using the facilities on a plane, so I always have to use the facilities afterwards.  Plenty of time to take my time and pick up my bag.  My ride, taxi or whatever will be there when I'm ready.

[Limey]

They should charge for carry-ons.  Not only that, if you bring shit onto the plane, it sits in your lap.  Carry-on luggage is responsible for more flight delays than all of the fat fuckers, mechanical problems, overslept flight attendants and drunk pilots combined.

Carry on is necessity for some business travelers and parents with kids.  Everyone else should check their bags.

I carry on when I have to make connections but, otherwise, unless I'm traveling very light (just a briefcase or laptop bag), I check my bag.  The fact that I am charged to check a bag - which is no bother to anyone except me - but not to carry on - which is a bother to everyone around and behind me on the plane and in any line at the airport - makes absolutely no sense.

Charging for carry ons and not for checked bags is the way to fix this.  It speeds up everything at the airport, assuming that the airline has its shit together at the bag drop*.

* CO doesn't have a bag drop at Newark.  Ridiculous.  Coming back from NYC, I prepaid for my checked bag and only needed to drop it off.  I was forced into the check-in line, which itself wasn't too bad, but there were only two people servicing the wide swath of check-in terminals, and they stuck the ends never coming to the middle where I was.  I tried to get either attendant and two different supervisors before finally finding a third supervisor to take my bag.  It was great he helped, but I could've done without being called a liar as to how long I'd been waiting (about 20 minutes post tag-printing at that point).  All-in-all, it took an hour to drop a prepaid bag.  If I had been tight on time, I would've still been in security when the door closed.

[Limey]

Just musing to myself (NTTAWWT)...I wonder if charging for checked bags is a way for airlines to get us to travel lighter.  Also, anyone know if they have to pay per bag / by volume for baggage handling?

[HudsonHawk]

Carry on is necessity for some business travelers and parents with kids.  Everyone else should check their bags.

If it's necessary, then they have to keep it in their laps. 

Charging for carry ons and not for checked bags is the way to fix this.  It speeds up everything at the airport, assuming that the airline has its shit together at the bag drop*.

And the bag drop doesn't have to be at the ticket counter.  They could easily gate check everything.

[VirtualBob]

i guess i do not fly enough to recognize suck. i have had positive experiences with UA.

I would say something about blind hogs and acorns, but I would not want to give offense ... at least by mistake.

[VirtualBob]

Anyone who drinks Miller Lite deserves to be insulted.

+1

[Jacksonian]

If it's necessary, then they have to keep it in their laps. 

For those with very small children it's not possible if travelling as the only parent.  Kid in lap.  Bag on floor.  Of course that is a very small percentage of travelers and easily identifiable for checking/speed purposes.

[Limey]

If it's necessary, then they have to keep it in their laps. 

There's a very good reason why this is a bad idea: I don't want to be hit in the face by the bag of the bloke sitting next to me when we hit turbulence.

[HudsonHawk]

For those with very small children it's not possible if travelling as the only parent.  Kid in lap.  Bag on floor.  Of course that is a very small percentage of travelers and easily identifiable for checking/speed purposes.

The kid shouldn't be in your lap.  It should be in the seat next to you...the seat for which you purchased a ticket.

[HudsonHawk]

There's a very good reason why this is a bad idea: I don't want to be hit in the face by the bag of the bloke sitting next to me when we hit turbulence.

Did I fail to mention the new rules on being allowed to smack the idiots sitting next to you?  There are lot of legitimate reasons.

[JimR]

I would say something about blind hogs and acorns, but I would not want to give offense ... at least by mistake.

why should that stop you?

[Limey]

I say they should charge a fat fucker premium. Who cares about a couple of packets of peanuts when the guy next to me clocks in at 350?

Remember when kids used to fly cheaper than adults?  If the cost of fuel makes weight so sensitive now that it costs $6 to take aloft a packet of peanuts, then passengers should be charged by the pound; bodies and baggage.  It wouldn't be a bargain for me, but at least I'd know that the behemoth next to me occupying part of me seat is at least paying for it.

[HudsonHawk]

Remember when kids used to fly cheaper than adults?  If the cost of fuel makes weight so sensitive now that it costs $6 to take aloft a packet of peanuts, then passengers should be charged by the pound; bodies and baggage.  It wouldn't be a bargain for me, but at least I'd know that the behemoth next to me occupying part of me seat is at least paying for it.

They should charge a fee for the short fuckers too.  And the weak fuckers.  If you aren't tall enough, or strong enough to take your shit in and out of the overhead bin without it falling on people, they charge you $1,000 extra.  Each way.

And if you attempt to walk down the aisle with a backpack on, you immediately get fined.  And dope slapped by everyone in an aisle seat.

[Andyzipp]

They should charge a fee for the short fuckers too.  And the weak fuckers.  If you aren't tall enough, or strong enough to take your shit in and out of the overhead bin without it falling on people, they charge you $1,000 extra.  Each way.

And if you attempt to walk down the aisle with a backpack on, you immediately get fined.  And dope slapped by everyone in an aisle seat.

How fat is this backpack you speak of?

[HudsonHawk]

How fat is this backpack you speak of?

Fat enough to whack every person you pass, each time you turn around, as you're attempting to drag your overstuffed non-carry-on down the aisle.

[Andyzipp]

Fat enough to whack every person you pass, each time you turn around, as you're attempting to drag your overstuffed non-carry-on down the aisle.

Ah.  It never occurred to me that people wouldn't try to avoid hitting other people until I started traveling.

[Limey]

They should charge a fee for the short fuckers too.  And the weak fuckers.  If you aren't tall enough, or strong enough to take your shit in and out of the overhead bin without it falling on people, they charge you $1,000 extra.  Each way.

Prevention is better than retribution.  Make everyone test the size of their carry on, and put the frame above head height.  If you can't get it up there yourself, check that sucker.

[WakePhil]

They should charge a fee for the short fuckers too.  And the weak fuckers.  If you aren't tall enough, or strong enough to take your shit in and out of the overhead bin without it falling on people, they charge you $1,000 extra.  Each way.

And if you attempt to walk down the aisle with a backpack on, you immediately get fined.  And dope slapped by everyone in an aisle seat.

How about the woman bringing two big, open bags of groceries and a huge purse? "I can't put these in the overhead, they'd spill out!" Turns to the rest of the plane, "Can you believe this woman (the flight attendant), Continental is the worst!"

Forced exit at cruising altitude?

[HudsonHawk]

How about the woman bringing two big, open bags of groceries and a huge purse? "I can't put these in the overhead, they'd spill out!" Turns to the rest of the plane, "Can you believe this woman (the flight attendant), Continental is the worst!"

Forced exit at cruising altitude?

Or the guy who thinks that his jacket is the only thing that should be allowed in the overhead.  9 people have to use that bin, asshole.

[Andyzipp]

Or the guy who thinks that his jacket is the only thing that should be allowed in the overhead.  9 people have to use that bin, asshole.

Jackets are hung up in the little closet in fir...oh right.  Yeah!  Bad jacket people!

[Bench]

Or the guy who thinks that his jacket is the only thing that should be allowed in the overhead.  9 people have to use that bin, asshole.

That one kills me every time.

[BatGirl]

i learned recently that you can bring all manner of food aboard a plane
but arriving to one's seat with a beer is considered a "big no-no"

[HudsonHawk]

i learned recently that you can bring all manner of food aboard a plane
but arriving to one's seat with a beer is considered a "big no-no"

Out of curiosity, how did you get the beer to the plane?  Beers are too big to check, and typically you're not allowed to leave an alcohol service area with an alcoholic beverage.

[Limey]

Jackets go on top of bags, or can be conveniently hung up on the tray table toggle.

I have been on a plane when someone took someone (else's) bag out of the overhead, put it in the aisle, put theirs up in its place and took their seat.

[BatGirl]

bought it along with a small fruit salad just before boarding at IAH
it was open and i was consuming it in full view of everyone
the only person that mentioned anything at all was the flight attendant standing in my row as i sat down

[Limey]

i learned recently that you can bring all manner of food aboard a plane
but arriving to one's seat with a beer is considered a "big no-no"

Especially if you're the pilot.

[HudsonHawk]

I have been on a plane when someone took someone (else's) bag out of the overhead, put it in the aisle, put theirs up in its place and took their seat.

Oh I see that all the time.

[Limey]

Oh I see that all the time.

I always carry on bar soap wrapped in a towel for such things.

[Limey]

bought it along with a small fruit salad just before boarding at IAH

Fruit salad without beer is like bangers without mash.

[HudsonHawk]

bought it along with a small fruit salad just before boarding at IAH
it was open and i was consuming it in full view of everyone
the only person that mentioned anything at all was the flight attendant standing in my row as i sat down

Ah...nothing washes down a fruit salad like a frosty brewskie...

Sounds like they frowned upon leaving the purchase area with an open container.  I bring those little airplane liquor bottles on all the time. 

[HudsonHawk]

I always carry on bar soap wrapped in a towel for such things.

Yep.  It's like people automatically think there are no more rules of behavior, as soon as they step through the door.

[BatGirl]

Ah...nothing washes down a fruit salad like a frosty brewskie...

Sounds like they frowned upon leaving the purchase area with an open container.  I bring those little airplane liquor bottles on all the time. 

for the record, the fruit salad was going to be the chaser
who can eat that while standing around holding 5 carry-on bags?

(and, let the record reflect, another "big no-no" is asking to be allowed to finish the beer)

[Limey]

Yep.  It's like people automatically think there are no more rules of behavior, as soon as they step through the door.

A friend of mine was traveling back from the UK with his wife and three kids, ranging from <2 to 6 years old (the kids, not the wife).  He had got seats assigned so that he was on a bank of 3 with the 2 older kids, and his wife was nearby with the baby.  Some a-hole was sitting in his assigned seat, suggested that my friend ask someone else to move if he wanted to sit with his kids, and then made a big drama about moving to his own assigned seat elsewhere on the plane.

Honestly, how I have completed any flight without justice-beating someone to within an inch of their life is beyond me.

[Limey]

Yep.  It's like people automatically think there are no more rules of behavior, as soon as they step through the door.

See also freeways and grocery stores.

[HudsonHawk]

(and, let the record reflect, another "big no-no" is asking to be allowed to finish the beer)

Your mistake was asking.

[BatGirl]

i also asked her if it was such a big deal
how did we make it to our seats with them?

she considered the bottles of shiner
and said it was probably because everyone thought it was root beer

regardless, the next time i travel i'm bringing longneck koozies
because it's about safety first

[HudsonHawk]

i also asked her if it was such a big deal
how did we make it to our seats with them?

she considered the bottles of shiner
and said it was probably because everyone thought it was root beer

regardless, the next time i travel i'm bringing longneck koozies
because it's about safety first

3 oz. or less in a clear zip-top baggie...

[Limey]

3 oz. or less in a clear zip-top baggie...

Has to be in a 3oz container, in a zip lock baggie.  I once had a near-empty tube of toothpaste confiscated because the container size was 3.2oz.  They don't care about the amount, just the container size.

[Bench]

Has to be in a 3oz container, in a zip lock baggie.  I once had a near-empty tube of toothpaste confiscated because the container size was 3.2oz.  They don't care about the amount, just the container size.

And the baggie must be quart sized and you may bring only one.

[MusicMan]

Yep.  It's like people automatically think there are no more rules of behavior, as soon as they step through the door.

Thanks a lot, bin Laden.

[VirtualBob]

And if you attempt to walk down the aisle with a backpack on, you immediately get fined.  And dope slapped by everyone in an aisle seat.

I already do that (except the fining part) ... it is absolutely outrageous the way some of these people plow a path through shoulders and chins.  I always grab the strap and give it a hefty jerk.

[Limey]

I already do that (except the fining part) ... it is absolutely outrageous the way some of these people plow a path through shoulders and chins.  I always grab the strap and give it a hefty jerk.

TZ Airlines - sit the fuck down and shut the fuck up!

Fly the Unfriendly Skies.

[VirtualBob]

See also freeways and grocery stores.

Yeah ... I politely (more or less) asked some jerk at HEB the other day, "Isn't this the 5-item line?" ... he grumbled away in a huff and the checker gave me a dirty look too before finally catching the spirit and almost laughing out loud.

[VirtualBob]

And the baggie must be quart sized and you may bring only one.

I sneak in with 1 Liter bags from Europe all the time.

[Astroholic]

I sneak in with 1 Liter bags from Europe all the time.

rebel.

[VirtualBob]

TZ Airlines - sit the fuck down and shut the fuck up!

Fly the Unfriendly Skies.

Sign me up.

[Andyzipp]

TZ Airlines - sit the fuck down and shut the fuck up!

Fly the Unfriendly Skies.

It goes without saying that we get to bring back this:



(http://blogs.dallasobserver.com/unfairpark/southwestairlinesflightattendent.jpg)

[MusicMan]

It goes without saying that we get to bring back this:

That all depends on who's doing the flight attending.

[Limey]

That all depends on who's doing the flight attending.

Easy

[Andyzipp]

That all depends on who's doing the flight attending.

Obviously I was referring to someone resembling the girl in the foreground, rather than Phillip Seymour Hoffman displayed in the background.

[94CougarGrad]

Shame they must remain off during takeoff and landing

SFN

[94CougarGrad]

My husband's flying to London soon for a conference. British Airways. A colleague at the university, who has flown BA all his life, informed him that they were the only way to go, ever.

[hostros7]

My husband's flying to London soon for a conference. British Airways. A colleague at the university, who has flown BA all his life, informed him that they were the only way to go, ever.

Except when they downgrade you from first class because they need to use a smaller plane and offer you a pittance for your trouble.  I'll never fly BA again, unless I have to which is a shame because the trip there in my little pod laden with booze and movies was quite lovely. 

[Limey]

My husband's flying to London soon for a conference. British Airways. A colleague at the university, who has flown BA all his life, informed him that they were the only way to go, ever.

I've had issues with BA before, but if you're flying between Houston and London direct, they're the only choice.  The 4 fare classes give you pricing flexibility and the free drinks help to pass the time.  CO does have a better entertainment system on board (although what's more entertaining than free drinks?), but I know people who have had the 777 swapped out for a United 767, which are shit reportedly.

BA also has a better schedule, and you get to leave from Terminal D, which is a breeze compared to C or E.  You have to have your parking sorted though, as you end up at E on the way back to go through immigration & customs.  You need to know where the inbetween parking is, or park offsite.

[WakePhil]

Has to be in a 3oz container, in a zip lock baggie.  I once had a near-empty tube of toothpaste confiscated because the container size was 3.2oz.  They don't care about the amount, just the container size.

Was trading stories with a guy in the security line and he said that TSA wouldn't let him bring this antique tea pot through. It did not have anything in it, but the TSA guy said, "It could contain more than 3oz." Ridiculous, I could hold 3+ oz of liquid in all sorts of places, like my shoe....oh, right.

[Limey]

Was trading stories with a guy in the security line and he said that TSA wouldn't let him bring this antique tea pot through. It did not have anything in it, but the TSA guy said, "It could contain more than 3oz." Ridiculous, I could hold 3+ oz of liquid in all sorts of places, like my shoe....oh, right.

Before getting on the plane, I've usually got a couple of pints in my belly.

[MusicMan]

Before getting on the plane, I've usually got a couple of pints in my belly.

A friend once declared the two liters of vodka he brought back from Moscow in his liver.

[94CougarGrad]

I've had issues with BA before, but if you're flying between Houston and London direct, they're the only choice.  The 4 fare classes give you pricing flexibility and the free drinks help to pass the time.  CO does have a better entertainment system on board (although what's more entertaining than free drinks?), but I know people who have had the 777 swapped out for a United 767, which are shit reportedly.

BA also has a better schedule, and you get to leave from Terminal D, which is a breeze compared to C or E.  You have to have your parking sorted though, as you end up at E on the way back to go through immigration & customs.  You need to know where the inbetween parking is, or park offsite.

He's actually flying out of DFW, but it is direct. Since it's on the university's dime, I'm sure he's in BA's version of coach, which his colleague feels is still superior to American-based airlines' coach sections. Something about the chair space for sitting and sleeping.

[Guinness]

When we were flying back and forth from London a lot BA was our first choice, as they had more room.  I always thought it was down to Airbus vs Boeing.

[austro]

When we were flying back and forth from London a lot BA was our first choice, as they had more room.  I always thought it was down to Airbus vs Boeing.

It's the airline's choice. The seating is very flexible, it's just a question of how the airline chooses to lay it out.

[Limey]

He's actually flying out of DFW, but it is direct. Since it's on the university's dime, I'm sure he's in BA's version of coach, which his colleague feels is still superior to American-based airlines' coach sections. Something about the chair space for sitting and sleeping.

I have heard that economy seats on US airlines are bigger than economy eats on non-US airlines because...well...Americans are fat.  I have no personal knowledge, however, never having flown economy on BA (I am in premium economy this trip, which has extra Leroy).

[Lefty]

little pod laden

Holy shit, there's more of 'em?