Astros at Snakes 8-8

[chuck]

You necks are missing a good game. Wandy got to bat in the first if that tells you anything. He got a knock, if that tells you anything else.

[austro]

I noticed that the ESPN box score said Martinez homered to RF (we're not getting the game on TV here tonight for some reason). How'd that look?

[jbm]

Know why no Lee?

Saw the highlights on mlb network. Who are these guys?

[chuck]

I noticed that the ESPN box score said Martinez homered to RF (we're not getting the game on TV here tonight for some reason). How'd that look?

It looked fucking great. He managed to stay way back on a change and just muscled a line drive out over Upton's head. Fucking Young made a ridiculous Willie Mays catch in deep, deep center on Shuck or the Astros would still be batting.

[Ron Brand]

Holy moly, they're spanking the crap out of Hudson.

[chuck]

Know why no Lee?

I think they wanted to get Downs in there while he's hot.

[Ron Brand]

Jesus, Wandy, throw strikes. You've got a lead.

[BizidyDizidy]

How did Boog reach?

[chuck]

How did Boog reach?

Altuve was on second. Booj hit a routine grounder to short. Altuve ran without hesitation. Ransom tried to rush things in order (I think) to get Altuve at third which might have been possible. He took his eye off the ball and booted it instead and everyone was safe.

[Navin R Johnson]

Last chance to watch the RedHooks for the week and Fox decides to not carry the game.  I will be a the Rays game Wednesday and plan on hunting down Gerry and badgering him into taking over asap.

[strosrays]

You necks are missing a good game.

Dude, it's Shark Week.

[NeilT]

I started looking for the game about 30 minutes ago, but only found the Rangers.  Are they Houston's team now?

[Bench]

I started looking for the game about 30 minutes ago, but only found the Rangers.  Are they Houston's team now?

FS-Houston doesn't give a fuck.  It's not blacked out if you're an MLB.TV subscriber, but given that I only want to watch the Astros, why the fuck would I subscribe?

[hostros7]

I started looking for the game about 30 minutes ago, but only found the Rangers.  Are they Houston's team now?

Agreed. This sucks.  

[MusicMan]

JD Martinez can hit a little bit.  As can Altuve.

[Ron Brand]

JD Martinez can hit a little bit.  As can Altuve.

So could Wallace. And CJ.

[NeilT]

Last chance to watch the RedHooks for the week and Fox decides to not carry the game.  I will be a the Rays game Wednesday and plan on hunting down Gerry and badgering him into taking over asap.

You will not see Gerry back in Houston for the near term. He's happy.

[Ron Brand]

You will not see Gerry back in Houston for the near term. He's happy.

I think I'd rather they found the next Gerry rather than the old Gerry.

[Jacksonian]

Wandy needs a map.

[MusicMan]

So could Wallace. And CJ.

Don't harsh my high.

[Navin R Johnson]

You will not see Gerry back in Houston for the near term. He's happy.

Au contraire, he is most definitely interested in coming back to Houston.

[jbm]

Do or Ray on Wandy and waivers:  he'll get through waivers alright, it's just a matter if he gets claimed. 

[Mr. Happy]

Great job, folks, while the missus and I were at dinner. Martinez and Altuve are hit machines.

[chuck]

Do or Ray on Wandy and waivers:  he'll get through waivers alright, it's just a matter if he gets claimed. 

OutSTANding analysis.

The Arizona tv guys were talking about the unusual number of scouts at tonight's game. Sutton actually pretty alertly pointed out that not all would be for Wandy, a lot of them will be guys from teams the Astros will play later in the season that need to figure out who the hell these guys are.

[Mr. Happy]

OutSTANding analysis.

The Arizona tv guys were talking about the unusual number of scouts at tonight's game. Sutton actually pretty alertly pointed out that not all would be for Wandy, a lot of them will be guys from teams the Astros will play later in the season that need to figure out who the hell these guys are.

That's a pretty good idea for other clubs to do, especially those clubs in the hunt who still have to play the Astros. The old scouting reports won't work.

[Mr. Happy]

Shuck has great plate awareness. He has worked several counts full after having been down 0-2 in his short big league career.

[chuck]

That's a pretty good idea for other clubs to do, especially those clubs in the hunt who still have to play the Astros. The old scouting reports won't work.

They'll work fine if you're playing the Phillies.

[Mr. Happy]

Fuck. We've got the Meals/Bucknor crew for this series.

[Mr. Happy]

They'll work fine if you're playing the Phillies.

Excellent point.

[rifraft]

So could Wallace. And CJ.

F you too. 

[Mr. Happy]

F you too. 

Hey, if either one of them could hit worth a shit, they'd still be here.

[chuck]

Fuck. We've got the Meals/Bucknor crew for this series.

I'm already looking forward to Bucknor's calling the game tomorrow for its comedic value.

[Ron Brand]

F you too. 

What I'm saying, is enjoy it now. They've got to prove they can adjust. Maybe they can.

[Mr. Happy]

I'm already looking forward to Bucknor's calling the game tomorrow for its comedic value.

Bucknor's strike zone has me crying one minutes and cursing the next. He has absolutely no feel for the strike zone and makes it up as he goes along.

[rifraft]

What I'm saying, is enjoy it now. They've got to prove they can adjust. Maybe they can.

top 4, batting averages in limited at bats:

Shuck      .333
Altuve      .344
Bourgeois  .320
Martinez    .300

[chuck]

Bucknor's strike zone has me crying one minutes and cursing the next. He has absolutely no feel for the strike zone and makes it up as he goes along.

He is hilariously bad. I've told this story several times before but twenty years ago or so I was living in DC and a friend of mine and I liked to go to minor league games in Potomac, VA, and Frederick, MD. We immediately noticed this one umpire (they worked in pairs) who was absolutely terrible. He was so bad that we actively tried to figure out where he was calling games so we could go see him. Next thing I know this clown is a fucking major league umpire. Unreal.

[Mr. Happy]

He is hilariously bad. I've told this story several times before but twenty years ago or so I was living in DC and a friend of mine and I liked to go to minor league games in Potomac, VA, and Frederick, MD. We immediately noticed this one umpire (they worked in pairs) who was absolutely terrible. He was so bad that we actively tried to figure out where he was calling games so we could go see him. Next thing I know this clown is a fucking major league umpire. Unreal.

A couple of old friends of mine slinked into the show courtesy of the umpire strike and subsequent break of Richie Philips's union. CB did that too, and he is an affirmative action beneficiary to boot.

[Mr. Happy]

Meals's strike zone is rivaling Bucknor's tonight.

[Mr. Happy]

Altuve!!! A three hit game.

[Mr. Happy]

I love watching this club. I know it won't last, but I just love the enthusiasm of the players on the field, who are clearly playing like they want to be here.

[Ebby Calvin]

9 runs, 15 hits through 6 innings.  Without Kabong.  Very nice.

[OregonStrosFan]

Altuve!!! A three hit game.

aka: Golden Altuve (2 = an 'Altuve'; 4 = "platinum Altuve").

[Mr. Happy]

Mark Grace just said that Dave Clark could hit. That's not what I remember.

[MusicMan]

Mark Grace just said that Dave Clark could hit. That's not what I remember.

He was simply Clark.

[Mr. Happy]

Wandy finally quit nibbling and started throwing his heater for strikes. Of course, he had to throw around 100 pitches in six innings to start doing this.

[JaneDoe]

Mark Grace just said that Dave Clark could hit. That's not what I remember.

Consider the source.

[Mr. Happy]

The Snakes television guys suck. We are so fucking lucky to have Brown and DeShaies.

[JaneDoe]

We are so fucking lucky to have Brown and DeShaies.

Yes we are.

[Ebby Calvin]

The Snakes television guys suck. We are so fucking lucky to have Brown and DeShaies.

Not quibbling with you, but I'll stick up for their sideline reporter, but that's because he's a friend (Joey Trum knows him too) and we used to work together.  He's also damn good at his job.

I agree about the other guys though.

[Mr. Happy]

Fulchino looks like he's throwing more two seamers now instead of that 95 mph four seamer, but it doesn't matter pitching against fucking Henry Blanco.

[Mr. Happy]

Not quibbling with you, but I'll stick up for their sideline reporter, but that's because he's a friend (Joey Trum knows him too) and we used to work together.  He's also damn good at his job.

I agree about the other guys though.

I was talking about the duo calling the game. Mark Grace blows, and the play-by-play guy is milquetoast who thinks he is funny.

[Mr. Happy]

Stop fucking nibbling, Fulchino, or carry your fat ass back to OkC.

[Ebby Calvin]

I was talking about the duo calling the game. Mark Grace blows, and the play-by-play guy is milquetoast who thinks he is funny.

I know, and I agree.

[chuck]

I was talking about the duo calling the game. Mark Grace blows, and the play-by-play guy is milquetoast who thinks he is funny.

I hadn't heard Daron Sutton in years, not since he called games for the Brewers. He is fucking Vin Scully today compared to how bad he was in Milwaukee. I mean, it's been ten years or so and you'd like to think people would improve at what they do every day over the course of a decade, but he has gone from Bucknor bad to middle of the road bad. Good for him, I say.

Am I losing my mind or was Altuve safe there?

[Mr. Happy]

Am I losing my mind or was Altuve safe there?

No, you're not. Altuve was safe.

[Bench]

So, for us non-subscribers, what's the score?

[Mr. Happy]

So, for us non-subscribers, what's the score?

9-1 good guys. Top 9

[Ebby Calvin]

9-1.

[Bench]

A couple of old friends of mine slinked into the show courtesy of the umpire strike and subsequent break of Richie Philips's union. CB did that too, and he is an affirmative action beneficiary to boot.

Not only is he a horrible fucking umpire but he's, *gasp* a minority too? 

Prepare the fainting couch.

[JaneDoe]

9-1 good guys. Top 9

Thanks.

[Bench]

9-1 good guys. Top 9

Yay!  I heard the 5 run first inning on the radio but have been out of it since then. 

[Mr. Happy]

Not only is he a horrible fucking umpire but he's, *gasp* a minority too? 

Prepare the fainting couch.

I maintain that is the only reason why he and the Angel of Death are still in the show.

[Mr. Happy]

God damn it,Wright. Throw strikes. You're fucking winning 9-1 in the bottom of the ninth inning.

[Ebby Calvin]

Ballgame.

[Mr. Happy]

Good guys win 9-1. Zitz 'em and pound Budweiser.

[Bench]

The Win Of The Week.  Always satisfying, despite not being televised.

[Mr. Happy]

For this club, we'll take any win we get.

[MusicMan]

For this club, we'll take any win we get.

No, we're holding out for higher quality wins.

[Mr. Happy]

No, we're holding out for higher quality wins.

For this crew, it don't get any better than tonight's win.

[Andyzipp]

Mark Grace just said that Dave Clark could hit. That's not what I remember.

I assume he meant he could hit until the Astros signed him in 1998.