Can I just say something here? Because virtually all the shit that I read that talks about teams possibly trading for Roy makes this huge deal about how big his contract is, and that he would have to be paid for not just this year, but- the horror!- NEXT year, too, when he'll still be under contract. So I just want to get this off my chest:
Dear contending baseball team (cc: local beat writers, Buster Olney types, et al),
Do you need a fucking starting pitcher or not? Do you want a really good one, or just an innings-eater type? ...You wanted Cliff Lee, didn't you? Yeah, well I don't think the Rangers are gonna be trading him anytime soon. But, damn, you need a really good pitcher like, today, don't you? December will be a little too late. And guess what: you're not alone. That team a game and a half behind you, they want the same kind of pitcher, and those two other teams trying to go for the Wild Card too. And we're not even talking about the AL yet. You know Kenny Williams is gonna go balls-in for some upgrades.
So you know you can't just lowball the Astros for Roy Oswalt. And that darn Ed Wade is saying they might not even pay any of his contract, let alone 90% of it like the guys at the NY Daily PostNews seem to think they should. And, I assure you, Drayton McLane does not need to "dump" any salary. That means you better show them the prospects. Oh, what's that shit you're muttering? You're gonna get Ted Lilly? Sure, right: you want Ted fucking Lilly starting the rubber match of a late-September series with your big rival? Really? You must be the Yankees. You must know you're gonna win your division anyway, and have Sabathia, Pettitte, etc. throwing for you. Wait, what? You're not the Yankees? Then you probably want somebody better than Ted Lilly, don't you?
Let's try a different tack: What if Oswalt were a free agent right now? You think you could sign him for a two-year deal, for less money then he's owed right now? Did you hear about the Lackey contract? Who would you rather have on your team? Do you start to get the picture? Yes... that's right, motherfucker: Supply and Demand. Two very powerful forces, very much at work here. Now, if you offer up better prospects than anybody else can, I have a feeling Drayton might toss a few mil your way... maybe. So, how badly do you want to get to the playoffs this year?
Sincerely,
Reuben