The Astros respond

[pravata]

with a translation from consultant Nick Naylor

Gentlemen, practice these words in front of the mirror:

Now that the Mitchell Report has been released, the Houston Astros are currently reviewing its contents.

Although we are constantly exploring the subject,

The Astros support the process that has taken place to compile this report, as well as the recommendations offered by Senator George Mitchell.

currently there is no direct evidence

"As we move forward, we will continue to strongly support the testing program agreed upon by the Commissioner's Office and the Players Association. We feel this program is an effective step in eradicating the use of performance-enhancing substances, and we continue to support this endeavor 100 percent. We also wish to thank Senator Mitchell for his efforts."

that links cell phone usage to brain cancer

Link

[Desperado]

Great movie.

[pravata]

Coming soon, to a GM near you,

“We're trying to put together the best team possible with the information we have at hand," (said Doug Melvin regarding the signing of Eric Gagne) "While we were disappointed to see Eric's name in the report, it was four years ago. At the time, HGH was not banned by baseball.”

"We don't condone what players might have done in the past ("I'm not here to talk about the past.") but we do have to move forward and build our team the best way we can."

"We use the information at hand to make decisions on players," said Melvin. "If teams were worried about players being on the Mitchell Report, there wouldn't have been any signings or trades."
Link

[Lurch]

"MacPhail said tomorrow's release of the Mitchell Report on performance-enhancing drugs had nothing to do with the timing of the trade and the two clubs had no discussions about potentially nullifying the deal if one of the traded players is cited in the report. "

http://www.baltimoresun.com/sports/baseball/bal-tejada1212,0,378258.story?coll=bal-attack-utility

[pravata]

"MacPhail said tomorrow's release of the Mitchell Report on performance-enhancing drugs had nothing to do with the timing of the trade and the two clubs had no discussions about potentially nullifying the deal if one of the traded players is cited in the report. "

http://www.baltimoresun.com/sports/baseball/bal-tejada1212,0,378258.story?coll=bal-attack-utility

So the Astros can't use the "disappointed"  line or the part about the "...information at hand..."  Wade is going to have to flog the "not here to talk about the past" schtick.  He needs to be careful and not blurt out that they just wanted a big galoot at short and were willing to do whatev, no matter what.

[Fredia]

So the Astros can't use the "disappointed"  line or the part about the "...information at hand..."  Wade is going to have to flog the "not here to talk about the past" schtick.  He needs to be careful and not blurt out that they just wanted a big galoot at short and were willing to do whatev, no matter what.

what it comes down to at this point is that no one relaly knows what wil happen with the teams and the players involved. just have to see what happens and how this plays out

[jasonact]

So the Astros can't use the "disappointed"  line or the part about the "...information at hand..."  Wade is going to have to flog the "not here to talk about the past" schtick.  He needs to be careful and not blurt out that they just wanted a big galoot at short and were willing to do whatev, no matter what.

I wonder if their thought wasn't more along the lines of realizing how pervasive this was going to be, and said, "To hell with it. Maybe he's dirty, but half the players out there probably are too. We can't avoid it altogether like we thought we could."

I'm not saying that's a better line, but I could see it happening that way.

[pravata]

I wonder if their thought wasn't more along the lines of realizing how pervasive this was going to be, and said, "To hell with it. Maybe he's dirty, but half the players out there probably are too. We can't avoid it altogether like we thought we could."

I'm not saying that's a better line, but I could see it happening that way.

The "so what, what are you going to do about it" tactic?  Or maybe he could say stuff like "I know that!  Don't you think I know that?  I can't believe that you would think that I do not know that!" while smoking a cigarette and covered in flop sweat.

[jasonact]

The "so what, what are you going to do about it" tactic?  Or maybe he could say stuff like "I know that!  Don't you think I know that?  I can't believe that you would think that I do not know that!" while smoking a cigarette and covered in flop sweat.

I like the latter.  Flop sweat's funnier.

[toddthebod]

Great movie.

The book is even better.  In fact, any book by Christopher Buckley is worth reading.  I remember reading "Thank you for Smoking" on the subway and laughing out loud.  That is not considered acceptable behavior on the subway.

[Froback]

The book is even better.  In fact, any book by Christopher Buckley is worth reading.  I remember reading "Thank you for Smoking" on the subway and laughing out loud.  That is not considered acceptable behavior on the subway.

Neither was women riding topless, but it has happend before.