Author Topic: Couch Slouch  (Read 6120 times)

JGrave

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Couch Slouch
« on: August 14, 2007, 02:25:56 pm »
I thought Norman Chad's column today was particularly poignant considering how often this topic is discussed amongst everyone here.  I also thought it was funny that it's buried way at the bottom of their online sports section.  I'm sure that's where they always put it though.

http://chron.com/disp/story.mpl/sports/5051383.html
DS Andy Wainwright: You do know there are more guns in the country than there are in the city.
DS Andy Cartwright: Everyone and their mums is packin' round here!
Nicholas Angel: Like who?
DS Andy Wainwright: Farmers.
Nicholas Angel: Who else?
DS Andy Cartwright: Farmers' mums.

MRaup

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #1 on: August 14, 2007, 02:52:37 pm »
Ask The Slouch
Question: Major leaguers go to the minors to rehab after injuries.

Where do minor leaguers go?

LEE BAILEY Gahanna, Ohio

Answer: I believe the Pittsburgh Pirates have them all signed through 2012.



THAT, is pretty damn funny.
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Froback

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #2 on: August 14, 2007, 02:59:16 pm »
I liked the POW one.  Very creative.

pravata

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #3 on: August 14, 2007, 03:16:57 pm »
I thought Norman Chad's column today was particularly poignant considering how often this topic is discussed amongst everyone here.  I also thought it was funny that it's buried way at the bottom of their online sports section.  I'm sure that's where they always put it though.

http://chron.com/disp/story.mpl/sports/5051383.html

Have we become so desensitized to irony that a story written with a complete lack of irony can be screamingly ironic?  He goes a long way to avoid naming his fellow chron hacks.

Lurch

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #4 on: August 14, 2007, 03:57:29 pm »
Have we become so desensitized to irony that a story written with a complete lack of irony can be screamingly ironic?  He goes a long way to avoid naming his fellow chron hacks.

Some would say it's like rain on your wedding day.
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Gleek

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #5 on: August 14, 2007, 04:23:09 pm »
Some would say it's like rain on your wedding day.

Not really ironic, just unfortunate?
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WulawHorn

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #6 on: August 14, 2007, 04:32:09 pm »
Not really ironic, just unfortunate?

I thought that was good luck- like getting shit on by a bird.


ybbodeus

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #7 on: August 14, 2007, 04:38:30 pm »
Chad doesn't live in this market, does he?  I thought he was a syndicated columnist.  Just askin', 'cuz I don't really know.
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Andyzipp

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #8 on: August 14, 2007, 04:39:29 pm »
Chad doesn't live in this market, does he?  I thought he was a syndicated columnist.  Just askin', 'cuz I don't really know.

You would be correct.  And his Couch Slouch Q&As are far funnier than his typical columns.

pravata

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #9 on: August 14, 2007, 04:41:01 pm »
Chad doesn't live in this market, does he?  I thought he was a syndicated columnist.  Just askin', 'cuz I don't really know.

Even better.  Not sure if the Chron is obligated to print all his articles.  If they just blindly printed it, that's even funnier.

ybbodeus

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #10 on: August 14, 2007, 04:46:02 pm »
Irony times three...heck, exponential irony.
"(512) ybbodeus looks just as creepy in HD as in person."   That is a problem, and we are working on it.

Andyzipp

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #11 on: August 14, 2007, 04:47:27 pm »
Even better.  Not sure if the Chron is obligated to print all his articles.  If they just blindly printed it, that's even funnier.

He shows up every Tuesday in the actual paper...no idea if it's more or less online.

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #12 on: August 14, 2007, 08:22:49 pm »
I thought that was good luck- like getting shit on by a bird.



People who weren't shit on by a bird say that while pissing themselves laughing.
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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #13 on: August 14, 2007, 11:20:42 pm »
People who weren't shit on by a bird say that while pissing themselves laughing.

You know, I learned recently that avian species do not have sphincter control, meaning that they just fly around with shit periodically shooting out of their asses. I have no idea why, but this immediately brought Richard Justice to mind.
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Craig

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #14 on: August 14, 2007, 11:43:25 pm »
You know, I learned recently that avian species do not have sphincter control, meaning that they just fly around with shit periodically shooting out of their asses. I have no idea why, but this immediately brought Richard Justice to mind.

That's ridiculous. Richard Justice can't fly.

Ty in Tampa

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #15 on: August 15, 2007, 05:58:42 am »
That's ridiculous. Richard Justice can't fly.

Good thing.
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Froback

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #16 on: August 15, 2007, 08:27:08 am »
That's ridiculous. Richard Justice can't fly.
But boy would we all like to see him try, say of the top of the building the Chronicle calls home.

MikeyBoy

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #17 on: August 15, 2007, 08:33:11 am »
But boy would we all like to see him try, say of the top of the building the Chronicle calls home.

You may get your wish, there is someone on top of the chron building right now peeking over the edge. He is sporting a hard hat though, so I guess he's safe.
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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #18 on: August 15, 2007, 01:11:48 pm »
You know, I learned recently that avian species do not have sphincter control, meaning that they just fly around with shit periodically shooting out of their asses. I have no idea why, but this immediately brought Richard Justice to mind.

In the MMP Press Box, Justice has a hole cut in his chair. He views the game and squirts outs his story on to some newsprint before leaving. Dick waves bye to The Jesus, who is in the corner of the room in front of a full length mirror staring at himself as he masturbates, pumping splooge for his next submission to the chron. Then just before he walks out the door, Justice pauses to scoff and grunt with utter disdain at the hard working red-head chick typing away laboriously at her laptop.
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The rest are pretending, they put on a show
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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #19 on: August 15, 2007, 01:38:52 pm »
I thought that was good luck- like getting shit on by a bird.



I have "shitty" luck and I was shit on by a bird---ironically at MMP. Little bastard flew over and got me on the arm.
It's all part of the game.....

Lurch

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #20 on: August 15, 2007, 03:44:45 pm »
---ironically at MMP

Way to bring it full circle
I wish the first word I had said when I was born was 'quote'. Then before I die, I could say, 'unquote.' --Steven Wright

Craig

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Re: Couch Slouch
« Reply #21 on: August 15, 2007, 09:12:16 pm »
I have "shitty" luck and I was shit on by a bird---ironically at MMP. Little bastard flew over and got me on the arm.

Are you sure you weren't sitting under the press box? You might have gotten splashed with "ink" from a Chron writer.