steM @ Astros - 7/7/07

[homer]

NY Mets

Reyes, SS
Gotay, 2B
Beltran, CF
Wright, 3B
Delgado, 1B
Lo Duca, C
Green, RF
Ledee, LF
Glavine, P

Houston

Biggio, 2B
Pence, CF
Loretta, 1B
Lee, LF
Ensberg, 3B
Burke, RF
Bruntlett, SS
Ausmus, C
Williams, P

[mihoba]

The sniveler.

Loretta batting 3rd, Mo 5th, Burke 6th.

Lance is sitting. I thought he was swinging much better from the right side recently.

Go Stros.

[Navin R Johnson]

Why no Puma?

[homer]

Why no Puma?

.111./.273/.111 v. Glavine - 22PA

[MRaup]

Why no Puma?

At least it's not Pence. That means we're still not giving up.

[Navin R Johnson]

.111./.273/.111 v. Glavine - 22PA

That makes sense, thanks.

[Lurch]

One of the rare nights I'll be flipping back and forth to the game.  Live Earth has some great acts and we havent even made it to The Police yet...

[mihoba]

One of the rare nights I'll be flipping back and forth to the game.  Live Earth has some great acts and we havent even made it to The Police yet...

Audio only for me, I have to watch the game.

[Lurch]

A real teammate would have snuck the ball in his glove...

[homer]

When is Drayton going to install the super slo-mo camera?

[Lurch]

OH MY GOD, what a double play!!!!!

[homer]

Fan-fucking-tastic double play

[mihoba]

Mo almost stuck his nose in LoDuca's mitt checking that first pitch.

C'mon Ensberg, earn your paycheck.

[homer]

Mo almost stuck his nose in LoDuca's mitt checking that first pitch.

C'mon Ensberg, earn your paycheck.

Lamb should be in there. Scott too.

[Navin R Johnson]

Here is Mo's chance to make some hey and maybe earn some PT....as he looks at the first pitch right down the pipe...

[mihoba]

Ducks on the pond, Morgan. Glavine pitched around Lee to get to you. Make him pay.

[mihoba]

Mo!! Good job.

[Navin R Johnson]

Nice!  Way to go Mo.

[Matt]

He swung the motherfucking bat!

[Amy]

OMG, Mo hit the ball!!!  I may pass out!!

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Blind Squirrell!!!!!

[Lurch]

Good looking swing there, Mo

[mihoba]

Good looking swing there, Mo

Be nice to see it more often.

[mihoba]

Shawn Green, funny stuff.

3-0 Astros!

[Matt]

The Bench Brigade strikes!

[homer]

Lamb should be in there. Scott too.

Dumbass.

[cougar]

That is one hella shift they've got working for Delgado.  Almost Bonds-esque.

[homer]

That is one hella shift they've got working for Delgado.  Almost Bonds-esque.

Shoulda put Burke in the bullpen.

[cougar]

Homerun for Delgado, #21 (7+7+7) at 7:07 on 7/7/07.  It was his 14th (7+7).  I feel like I'm in the DaVinci Code or something.  Or they could just be making too much out of a coincidence, I'm still trying to decide.

[Gleek]

Shoulda put Burke in the bullpen.

nah, he aint got enough arm strength. plus, he woulda taken a bad path to that ball and missed it.

[homer]

20 HR for Woodrow, tied for NL lead. With Cole Hamels.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

So far Live Earth has been pretty lame. Rally bad sound mixes. Madonna was pretending she was playing a guitar, a heavy a shit Les Paul... she should fake with a light weight knock-off. Irrelavent dumb ass. Many of these acts are not what I call cutting edge or important. When do the Police play. Now it Kellie Clarkson. Ouch my ears, my eyes!!! The humanity. The horror! I got to quit switching from the game.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

20 HR for Woodrow, tied for NL lead. With Cole Hamels.

It be better if he were tied with Cole in victories or strike-outs.

[Lurch]

So far Live Earth has been pretty lame. Rally bad sound mixes. Madonna was pretending she was playing a guitar, a heavy a shit Les Paul... she should fake with a light weight knock-off. Irrelavent dumb ass. Many of these acts are not what I call cutting edge or important. When do the Police play. Now it Kellie Clarkson. Ouch my ears, my eyes!!! The humanity. The horror! I got to quit switching from the game.

Foo Fighters killed.  Metallica played a weak set, but it was still Metallica.  Not a fan of her music, but Alicia Keys singing Give Me Shelter was hot.

Spinal Tap.  Holy Shit.

[cougar]

Good to see Carlo$ the Moleman getting a warm reception from the crowd.

[cougar]

So far Live Earth has been pretty lame. Rally bad sound mixes. Madonna was pretending she was playing a guitar, a heavy a shit Les Paul... she should fake with a light weight knock-off. Irrelavent dumb ass. Many of these acts are not what I call cutting edge or important. When do the Police play. Now it Kellie Clarkson. Ouch my ears, my eyes!!! The humanity. The horror! I got to quit switching from the game.

Question:  What sort of environmental commentary is supposed to be raised by flying bands and their crews all over the world in private (probably) jets so they can play concerts in front of huge crowds who will most likely leave nonbiodegradeable trash all over the place?  I'm curious.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Yeah!?!? I missed Sipnal Tap??? Fuck!

Anyway the Chili Peps are on now.

[MikeyBoy]

Foo Fighters killed.  Metallica played a weak set, but it was still Metallica.  Not a fan of her music, but Alicia Keys singing Give Me Shelter was hot.

Spinal Tap.  Holy Shit.

Let me know if Cross Canadian Ragweed plays, then maybe I'll flip over.

[Gleek]

Question:  What sort of environmental commentary is supposed to be raised by flying bands and their crews all over the world in private (probably) jets so they can play concerts in front of huge crowds who will most likely leave nonbiodegradeable trash all over the place?  I'm curious.

Dude don't rain on their parade, they are the elites of society.  They DESERVE those private jets.  It's only us peons who pollute and need to be held responsible.  GAWD man, don't you know anything!

[Lurch]

Yeah!?!? I missed Sipnal Tap??? Fuck!

Anyway the Chili Peps are on now.

Will Ferrell is a great drummer

[cougar]

Wow, nice to see The Sniveller still gets that extra 4-6 inches on the outside of the plate when he wants it.  Good piece of hitting by Carlos though.

[cougar]

Dude don't rain on their parade, they are the elites of society.  They DESERVE those private jets.  It's only us peons who pollute and need to be held responsible.  GAWD man, don't you know anything!

You're right.  Who am I to question them?  I duck my head and cover myself in sackcloth and ash as a sign of contrition.

BTW, how did Al Gore III get a Prius up to 100 MPH?  Is there a rocket propelled version I have yet to hear about?  Or did he just get a head start by driving it down a mountain first?

[cougar]

Woodrow's #1!  Woodrow's #1!  If you're going to be bad at something, you might as well be the best at being bad at it.

[homer]

Woodrow has taken sole possession of the HR lead. I knew he could do it.

[MikeyBoy]

Woodrow moves ahead of Hamels in the homerun race.

[MikeyBoy]

dammit

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Question:  What sort of environmental commentary is supposed to be raised by flying bands and their crews all over the world in private (probably) jets so they can play concerts in front of huge crowds who will most likely leave nonbiodegradeable trash all over the place?  I'm curious.

The only commentary I see is an effort to increase the awareness of the notion of man-caused global warming, and in doing so, allow corporate brands to create commercial tie-ins and capitalize from another marketing opportunity. "Hey! Look at us! We're so fucking green!!"

[cougar]

The only commentary I see is an effort to increase the awareness of the notion of man-caused global warming, and in doing so, allow corporate brands to create commercial tie-ins and capitalize from another marketing opportunity. "Hey! Look at us! We're so fucking green!!"

I see....  Enviro-capitalism.  Has that term been used yet or can I still copyright it and cash in?

[MikeyBoy]

Nice outing by Woody despite the dingers. Now let's go beat these cocksuckers.

[Gleek]

You're right.  Who am I to question them?  I duck my head and cover myself in sackcloth and ash as a sign of contrition.

BTW, how did Al Gore III get a Prius up to 100 MPH?  Is there a rocket propelled version I have yet to hear about?  Or did he just get a head start by driving it down a mountain first?

Just don't let it happen again.  Al Gore drives a prius in what fantasy world?
Oh, shit i forgot we should all bow down and thank the man, we wouldn't be here without him.  After all he did invent the internet.

[LonghornCDR]

Woodrow moves ahead of Hamels in the homerun race.

Looked like the Wright dinger hit a guy in the nads.  Or at least very near them.  Ouch.

[Gleek]

I see....  Enviro-capitalism.  Has that term been used yet or can I still copyright it and cash in?

cash in bro, i love this term.

[homer]

Al Gore drives a prius in what fantasy world?

Al Gore Jr. was arrested this week after driving his Prius 100mph.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

The third one. The ex-VP's son.

[Lurch]

Al Gore Jr. was arrested this week after driving his Prius 100mph.

And somewhere a bookie lost thousands as his clients cashed in on a wager that Al Gore would be the next celeb to get arrested.  Thing is, he forgot to define which Al Gore.

[homer]

The third one. The ex-VP's son.

There are three of them? I wasn't aware.

[MikeyBoy]

Gore III is just keeping it green.

[cougar]

Just don't let it happen again.  Al Gore drives a prius in what fantasy world?
Oh, shit i forgot we should all bow down and thank the man, we wouldn't be here without him.  After all he did invent the internet.

Nah, not Manbearpig, his spawn:

http://cbs13.com/national/local_story_185123922.html

Well, we know HE'S gone green at least.  I bet he's hanging with Snoop Dog at this thing.

edit: Dammit, that's what I get for going to find an article.  The good jokes have been taken.

[Gleek]

Gore III is just keeping it green.

I'm guessin that thing don't get 65 mpg when it's hurtling down the freeway at 100 mph.

[Gleek]

Nah, not Manbearpig, his spawn:

http://cbs13.com/national/local_story_185123922.html

Well, we know HE'S gone green at least.  I bet he's hanging with Snoop Dog at this thing.

edit: Dammit, that's what I get for going to find an article.  The good jokes have been taken.

HAHA, Manbearpig!  Dude if you coined this one you're 2-2, i love it.

Dude has definately gone GREEN, look at that mug shot.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

"Woody gives up the occassional HR." - Greg Lucas channeling Bill Worrell.

[Lurch]

Nice Game Woody!

[Lurch]

HAHA, Manbearpig!  Dude if you coined this one you're 2-2, i love it.

Someone needs to catch up on their SouthPark

[cougar]

HAHA, Manbearpig!  Dude if you coined this one you're 2-2, i love it.

Unfortunately, I got this one from Trey Parker and Matt Stone via South Park.

[cougar]

"Woody gives up the occassional HR." - Greg Lucas channeling Bill Worrell.

Next Greg will be saying that porn stars occassionally have sex on film for money.

[Gleek]

Unfortunately, I got this one from Trey Parker and Matt Stone via South Park.

AHHH, I have been working WAY TOO MUCH LATELY.

[Savage]

Come on Qualls.  Get the fuckin mole.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

I don't think that's a mole. I think it's a wart he took a sharpie to.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

That was a big strike out. The kind needed from Qualls. He did his job there.

[mihoba]

Whew, way to blow him away, Qualls. Huge K right there.

[MikeyBoy]

fuckin huge

[homer]

AHHH, I have been working WAY TOO MUCH LATELY.

Even Fredia dropped a South Park reference the other day. You suck.

[Savage]

I don't think that's a mole. I think it's a wart he took a sharpie to.

Whatever it is, its greedy, ungrateful, piece of shit ass is sitting down.  

[cougar]

*holds envelope to my forehead*

"Puppy dogs, kitty cats, Skinemax, and Carlos Beltran striking out in a clutch situation."

*tears open the envelope, removes piece of paper*

"What are 4 things that make me smile?"

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Whatever it is, its greedy, ungrateful, piece of shit ass is sitting down. 

A few years back, for about half a year, it was a beauty mark.

[MikeyBoy]

Even Fredia dropped a South Park reference the other day. You suck.

I have found it helps to read her posts out loud with an Eric Cartman voice.

[Lurch]

*holds envelope to my forehead*

"Puppy dogs, kitty cats, Skinemax, and Carlos Beltran striking out in a clutch situation."

*tears open the envelope, removes piece of paper*

"What are 4 things that make me smile?"

What are 4 things that take less than a minute a day

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Shit, why'd Pence hit it straight to Reyes? Fuckin' rook.

[Gleek]

Even Fredia dropped a South Park reference the other day. You suck.

yeah, i caught it.  Man, when you're working 94 hrs a week life kinda gets a little twisted ya know.

[cougar]

What are 4 things that take less than a minute a day

Nah. Carlos dragged that AB out well past a minute.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

John-Bon Jovi? WTF. Is this Live Aid, is this '85?

[cougar]

yeah, i caught it.  Man, when you're working 94 hrs a week life kinda gets a little twisted ya know.

Jesus man what are you, Lindsay Lohan's sponsor?

[Gleek]

A few years back, for about half a year, it was a beauty mark.

whatever it is, shit CUT IT OFF YOUR FUCKING HEAD!  Its not like he doesn't have the money for it.

[homer]

yeah, i caught it.  Man, when you're working 94 hrs a week life kinda gets a little twisted ya know.

WFW

[Gleek]

Jesus man what are you, Lindsay Lohan's sponsor?

Heh, poor ass shift worker in beaumont.  Were veeeeerrrrrryyyy short handed right now, and my bastard bosses won't hire anyone.

[cougar]

whatever it is, shit CUT IT OFF YOUR FUCKING HEAD!  Its not like he doesn't have the money for it.

NY state taxes, Satan gets his cut, and cost of living in NYC.  Carlo$ is probably about tapped out.

[Lurch]

Wow.

[homer]

Gunther with the outfield assist. Fuckin Huge.

[Gleek]

NY state taxes, Satan gets his cut, and cost of living in NYC.  Carlo$ is probably about tapped out.

I love you.  Not, like, in that way, but i love you man.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Good for Pence. He has to at least make those outs.

[mihoba]

Damn! Hunter PENCE!!! with a nice throw. I haven't seen that strong of an arm from him before.

[cougar]

Heh, poor ass shift worker in beaumont.  Were veeeeerrrrrryyyy short handed right now, and my bastard bosses won't hire anyone.

Beaumont? EEWWWWWWWWWWW.  I've got to go over there next week for a meeting at Conn's offices.  I'm not looking forward to it.

Boy, Hunter sucks in CF.  Runners ALWAYS go first to third on him.  Oh wait, Lo Duca got nailed.  My bad.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Boy, Hunter sucks in CF.  Runners ALWAYS go first to third on him.  Oh wait, Lo Duca got nailed.  My bad.

That's how low your expectations have become. That should be a routine out.

[MikeyBoy]

Nice throw by slingblade, but Lo Duca isn't the swiftest current in the creek.

[cougar]

I love you.  Not, like, in that way, but i love you man.

You're still not getting my Bud Light.

Man, I can't believe I just referenced those commercials.

[Gleek]

Damn! Hunter PENCE!!! with a nice throw. I haven't seen that strong of an arm from him before.

Yeah it was awesome, but my ass has got to be up and at work at 4:30 in the morning.  Really don't want extras tonight.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Maybe Lee will help you out, Gleek.

[Gleek]

You're still not getting my Bud Light.

Man, I can't believe I just referenced those commercials.

Don't drink Bud Light anymore, so you should be safe.

[Gleek]

Maybe Lee will help you out, Gleek.

maybe not.

[Gleek]

Mo, lookin good tonight.

[mihoba]

PH Berkman here?

ETA: Yep

[cougar]

Don't drink Bud Light anymore, so you should be safe.

Eh, I'm limiting myself to Shiner, but I don't feel like going downstairs to get one.

Holy hell, Morgan got 2 hits in one game!  That's about a month's work isn't it?

[Gleek]

ok,ok I'm feelin it now, comon Berkman!

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Ensberg & Burke keep it going. That was highly improbable. 

[homer]

Gascan on the way.

Oops, NM.

[cougar]

Ensberg & Burke keep it going. That was highly improbable. 

Thank you for that analysis, Mr. Spock.

OK, Lance gets to turn around one of the Midget Redneck's fastballs.

Edit: Or not.

[Gleek]

Eh, I'm limiting myself to Shiner, but I don't feel like going downstairs to get one.

Holy hell, Morgan got 2 hits in one game!  That's about a month's work isn't it?

Hes just tryin to up his trade value from half a warm coke, to a cold six pack.

[homer]

Thank you for that analysis, Mr. Spock.

OK, Lance get to turn around one of the Midget Redneck's fastballs.

Feliciano

[Lurch]

Feliciano

Bless you

[mihoba]

Lucas is such a twerp. Rambling on about Wagner, blah blah blah, and it's Feliciano coming in.

[Gleek]

Lucas is such a twerp. Rambling on about Wagner, blah blah blah, and it's Feliciano coming in.

I miss JD.

[mihoba]

Crapola

[Gleek]

SHITTTTTTTFUCK!!!!

[cougar]

Pedro Feliciano.  Name sounds like he should be singing love song duets with Julio Englasias.

Well, that was quick.

[MikeyBoy]

Free baseball on it's way.

[Gleek]

Fuck it, i'm toughin it out.  Fuckin 'Stros better come back and win this fucking game though!

[Amy]

I miss JD.

I think you speak for all of us there.  According to Lucas, Lance sometimes has trouble with off-speed changeups.  Think I'll go get another beer.

[Gleek]

I think you speak for all of us there.  According to Lucas, Lance sometimes has trouble with off-speed changeups.  Think I'll go get another beer.

Enjoy it i have to stop drinking for the night.

Lucus is an off-speed changeup.

[Lurch]

Lucus is an off-speed changeup.

Irregardless

[Gleek]

Lucus is also redundant and tends to repeat himself.  Couldn't resist.

[homer]

Lucus is also redundant and tends to repeat himself.  Couldn't resist.

Generally, he just say the same thing over and over.

[Amy]

Popped open the last Yuengling in the fridge.  I picked up a sixer of Shiner at the Super Target this afternoon.  Wonder if the game will go long enough to get into it?

[Gleek]

Popped open the last Yuengling in the fridge.  I picked up a sixer of Shiner at the Super Target this afternoon.  Wonder if the game will go long enough to get into it?

I'd love for ya to, just drink fast cause this baby's gonna end in the bottom of this inning.

[cougar]

Popped open the last Yuengling in the fridge.  I picked up a sixer of Shiner at the Super Target this afternoon.  Wonder if the game will go long enough to get into it?

Will you marry me?  I'm even willing to go to N. Va.  It'll give me a chance to go back to Hampden-Sydney and be one of those pathetic alumni that walk around campus trying to pick up coeds at the fraternity parties that think you're a student's dad.

[Amy]

Will you marry me?  I'm even willing to go to N. Va.  It'll give me a chance to go back to Hampden-Sydney and be one of those pathetic alumni that walk around campus trying to pick up coeds at the fraternity parties that think you're a student's dad.

Depends...how high maintenance are you?  No need to move to Virginia though.  I'm probably moving to Houston in the next couple of months.

[Savage]

how the hell do the pyramids at giza not make the 7 wonders of the world?

[Lurch]

pinch run?

[Gleek]

Lets go Biggs!

[Lurch]

how the hell do the pyramids at giza not make the 7 wonders of the world?

They got some honorary position as the last remaining origional 7 wonders

[homer]

pinch run?

Its Ausmus.

[Gleek]

Its Ausmus.

Honestly, maybe not a bad idea.  Wait, yes it is. Nevermind...

[mihoba]

how the hell do the pyramids at giza not make the 7 wonders of the world?

Honorary wonder. They want new stuff.

[cougar]

Depends...how high maintenance are you?  No need to move to Virginia though.  I'm probably moving to Houston in the next couple of months.

High maintenance?  Nah, I'm practically a station wagon. 

[Savage]

They got some honorary position as the last remaining origional 7 wonders

that's so lame.  I have admittedly not seen the statue in brazil, but i just saw the similar one in lisbon and was not overwhelmed. nothing mysterious or wonderous about that shit.  

[mihoba]

Pigpen guessed wrong. Bummer.

[Amy]

High maintenance?  Nah, I'm practically a station wagon. 

Hmm...can you cook?

[Gleek]

High maintenance?  Nah, I'm practically a station wagon. 

Got the neat-o wood paneling on the sides, cause Amy don't go for the cheap shit.

[cougar]

Honorary wonder. They want new stuff.

Does that mean the Astrodome's still the 8th wonder?  It's new, in a "timeline of the universe" sort of way.

[cougar]

Got the neat-o wood paneling on the sides, cause Amy don't go for the cheap shit.

And the pleather interior, bitches!

[HudsonHawk]

Pigpen guessed wrong. Bummer.

That's a long walk back to the dugout when you get caught looking with the winning run on 2B.

[Gleek]

Fuck, i'm gonna be up all night.

[mihoba]

Does that mean the Astrodome's still the 8th wonder?  It's new, in a "timeline of the universe" sort of way.

It is to me.

[cougar]

Hmm...can you cook?

Umm, if you count dumping contents of various cans into a pot and waiting for the smoke alarm to go off "cooking" than sure.

Actually, I have my meals created by a personal chef.  You may have heard of him.  Chef Boyardee.  Specializes in Italian cuisine.

[Gleek]

Comon Wheels, hit him in the mole, wart, thingy.

[Gleek]

Umm, if you count dumping contents of various cans into a pot and waiting for the smoke alarm to go off "cooking" than sure.

Actually, I have my meals created by a personal chef.  You may have heard of him.  Chef Boyardee.  Specializes in Italian cuisine.

You sure you're not from Beaumont?

[Gleek]

SHIT

[cougar]

Another damn Texas Leaguer.  That's what, the 3rd or 4th one tonight?

[cougar]

You sure you're not from Beaumont?

I'm sure.  It's the real stuff, not the Wal-Mart generic knockoff.

[Gleek]

Nah, i cut it off at six, ohh shit, you ment bloops for the mole.  My bad...

[Gleek]

I'm sure.  It's the real stuff, not the Wal-Mart generic knockoff.

You should try it sometime, chef boyardouche really ain't that bad.  Neither is uncle Bin Ladens rice.

[Amy]

Umm, if you count dumping contents of various cans into a pot and waiting for the smoke alarm to go off "cooking" than sure.

Actually, I have my meals created by a personal chef.  You may have heard of him.  Chef Boyardee.  Specializes in Italian cuisine.

Eeuw!  Sorry, I either need a guy who can cook or makes enough to pay for fairly frequent visits to decent restaurants.  Unless of course you look like Brad Ausmus.

[cougar]

Eeuw!  Sorry, I either need a guy who can cook or makes enough to pay for fairly frequent visits to decent restaurants.  Unless of course you look like Brad Ausmus.

Does McDonald's count as "decent"?

[HudsonHawk]

Eeuw!  Sorry, I either need a guy who can cook or makes enough to pay for fairly frequent visits to decent restaurants.  Unless of course you look like Brad Ausmus.

I can cook AND I make enough money to take you out to fancy restaurants.  Forget Brad Ausmus for a moment.

[cougar]

I can cook AND I make enough money to take you out to fancy restaurants.  Forget Brad Ausmus for a moment.

Damn admin trying to steal my woman!  I challenge you to pistols at dawn sir!

[Gleek]

I can cook AND I make enough money to take you out to fancy restaurants.  Forget Brad Ausmus for a moment.

Well take your pick, I can not cook, make enough money to eat out every night, but Brad ain't got nothin on me.

[Amy]

I can cook AND I make enough money to take you out to fancy restaurants.  Forget Brad Ausmus for a moment.

Oooh, a bidding war!  What else ya got?  Oh, and by decent restaurant, I'm thinking Chuy's or better.

[Gleek]

SHIT, nevermind i'm engaged, sorry. (yes she's standing over my shoulder)

[HudsonHawk]

Damn admin trying to steal my woman!  I challenge you to pistols at dawn sir!

Sorry, but you couldn't possibly keep Amy supplied with enough Shiner to hold her attention.  A woman has certain needs.

[HudsonHawk]

SHIT, nevermind i'm enguaged, sorry. (yes she's standing over my shoulder)

I was enguaged once.  They have pills for that.

[Gleek]

Damn admin trying to steal my woman!  I challenge you to pistols at dawn sir!

Succubus try'd to steal my BABY!!

[MikeyBoy]

SHIT, nevermind i'm enguaged, sorry. (yes she's standing over my shoulder)

Is that followed by a shotgun wedding?

[Amy]

Sorry, but you couldn't possibly keep Amy supplied with enough Shiner to hold her attention.  A woman has certain needs.

Well, at the ballpark my needs can be held down to two Shiners per game--one during BP and one picked up just prior to game time.  After all, there's a game that can't be interrupted by trips to the restroom or to buy more beer.  Plus most days there will be Bidge and Brad to look at.

Oh and fuck Jose Reyes.

[HudsonHawk]

Reyes has nice range.

[Gleek]

I was enguaged once.  They have pills for that.

Shit, fixed it.

[gwat]

Brad ain't got nothin on me.

'ceptin', of course, a Dartmouth education.

[Amy]

Fuck that motherfucking mole man!!!!

[gwat]

I was enguaged once.  They have pills for that.

they have water hoses for that.

[cougar]

Dammit Carlos you need to muscle up to anywhere but center!  ANYWHERE BUT CENTER!

[Savage]

Carlos has no luck.

[HudsonHawk]

Well, at the ballpark my needs can be held down to two Shiners per game--one during BP and one picked up just prior to game time.  After all, there's a game that can't be interrupted by trips to the restroom or to buy more beer.  Plus most days there will be Bidge and Brad to look at.

Oh and fuck Jose Reyes.

Sorry, but if I buy you Shiners and take you to fancy restaurants, I don't want to even *hear* about Brad Ausmus or Craig Biggio.

[HudsonHawk]

Fuck that motherfucking mole man!!!!

By the way, you'll have to tone down that language when you meet Mom.

[cougar]

Sorry, but you couldn't possibly keep Amy supplied with enough Shiner to hold her attention.  A woman has certain needs.

I have a 12 in the fridge and car keys so I can go get more.  That'll get us started.

[Amy]

Sorry, but if I buy you Shiners and take you to fancy restaurants, I don't want to even *hear* about Brad Ausmus or Craig Biggio.

I didn't say you'd be hearing about them, except in a baseball context of course.  Doesn't mean I won't be admiring them.  Although really, how much longer would you have to worry about them?

[Gleek]

'ceptin', of course, a Dartmouth education.

I have a pretty good education myself, granted not ivey league, but a lot of good its done me or him for that matter.

[HudsonHawk]

I have a 12 in the fridge and car keys so I can go get more.  That'll get us started.

You youngsters...no idea what it takes to woo a woman.

[mihoba]

I have a pretty good education myself, granted not ivey league, but a lot of good its done me or him for that matter.

Where do you work shift work at? I'm up at Rayburn lake.

[cougar]

Ensberg takes strike 3.  I'm SHOCKED I tell you, SHOCKED!

[Amy]

You youngsters...no idea what it takes to woo a woman.

Oh, and LOVE fine jewelry.  None of that costume crap.

[cougar]

You youngsters...no idea what it takes to woo a woman.

Sorry HH, but it's no longer socially acceptable to bash women over the head with a wooden club and drag them by the hair back to your cave.  They call that kidnapping now.

[HudsonHawk]

Oh, and LOVE fine jewelry.  None of that costume crap.

No problem.  I love big tits.

[Lurch]

Damn, Mo.  It's sad when your at-bats become cliche.

[Savage]

I didn't say you'd be hearing about them, except in a baseball context of course.  Doesn't mean I won't be admiring them.  Although really, how much longer would you have to worry about them?

How sad - where is the eye candy going to come from now?  I remember going with my girlfriends to the games in jr high and giggling and staring at bagwell and biggio's butts.  

[94CougarGrad]

Bork enters the game. Time to get nervous.

Listen to what's-his-name on FSN, trying to convince us that Bork has been a good reliever more often than he has been bad. I'm still nervous.

[gwat]

I have a pretty good education myself, granted not ivey league, but a lot of good its done me or him for that matter.

So I discern. How's that spelling tutelage going?

[Amy]

No problem.  I love big tits.

If you can provide the jewelry, I think I've got the rest covered.

[cougar]

Man, when the hell will Franco retire?  I'm sure his social security will keep him in Depends and Metamucil just fine.

[Gleek]

Where do you work shift work at? I'm up at Rayburn lake.

Actually in Port Arthur (job), but i live in Nederland.  BTW, it seems to me that Brad's Dartmouth Education was kinda wasted.  I mean, shit, he coulda been a brain surgeon, rocket scientist, or hell he even could have been one of them damn elitist bastards flying around in their personal jets tellin us all to only use one sheet of TP to wipe our asses.  What a waste.

[cougar]

If you can provide the jewelry, I think I've got rest covered.

I'm out folks.  Gotta go to Klein's for a second.

[HudsonHawk]

So I discern. How's that spelling tutelage going?

I'm still wondering how good an education could be if it's below the "ivey" league.

[Gleek]

So I discern. How's that spelling tutelage going?

I made a typo, sorry.  I'm an idiot.

[Savage]

Great throw by Burke.

[Amy]

Whew!  That was scary.  Come on Bork, can't be depending on Burke's outfield prowess.

[94CougarGrad]

NICE throw by Burke, really on the spot. Way to cut off that run home.

[Amy]

Looking like Shiner time.

[cougar]

Replacing Bork with Miller.  Is this what the executive world calls a "lateral move"?

[Zac D]

This moment is not good.

[HudsonHawk]

Great throw by Burke.

Well, it was a lollipop, but it got the job done.

[mihoba]

Replacing Bork with Miller.  Is this what the executive world calls a "lateral move"?

Let's hope it's not a "latrine" move.

[cougar]

I just put on a recording of "Danse Macabre" to get me in the proper frame of mind for this.

[Gleek]

look guys i really have not got much sleep this week, you'll have to excuse brain farts like "ivey" league.  I'm usually not this bad.  I'm far from perfect but not "ivey" league bad, i promise.

[Zac D]

Also, Reyes hits lefties about sixty points better than righties this year, and forty points better over his career.

Gulp.

[Amy]

I just put on a recording of "Danse Macabre" to get me in the proper frame of mind for this.

Baseball and Saint Saens?  Interesting combination.

[mihoba]

reverT gets the job done. Bravo!

[cougar]

Well son of a bitch.  Trever got the job done.

[Gleek]

this game will never end.

[Zac D]

Niiiiiiiiice.

[94CougarGrad]

Holy shit, way to go, Miller.

[cougar]

Baseball and Saint Saens?  Interesting combination.

Can't beat some good Raúl Prieto Ramírez keyboard action.

[Amy]

It would be an excellent idea to win this game now.  I really don't care to go much further with our pen.

[Gleek]

I'm happy, now please give us a run!

[MikeyBoy]

reverT should be DFA'd like yesterday.

[cougar]

It would be an excellent idea to win this game now.  I really don't care to go much further with our pen.

Nonsense!  Bring on Albers!

[Amy]

Ha!  Burkelet almost busted his ass slamming on the brakes there.

[gwat]

I just put on a recording of "Danse Macabre" to get me in the proper frame of mind for this.

One of my Halloween, nee alltime, favorites. It, or the suggestion of it, delivered the luck we needed....for now.

[cougar]

OPie does not look natural going up there to bunt.  Good job getting that one down though.

[Lurch]

reverT should be DFA'd like yesterday.

and he cant even hit for himself.  He's only on the team b/c Purp is his friend and Drayton is racist.  Feel free to insert this into any Chron blog and gain instant creditability creditability.

ETA: fuck it.  was going to correct, but in context, it works.

[Amy]

Come on Bradley, be the man!

[Amy]

and he cant even hit for himself.  He's only on the team b/c Purp is his friend and Drayton is racist.  Feel free to insert this into any Chron blog and gain instant creditability.

If we somehow managed to acquire Grady Sizemore, I bet JdJO would criticize Drayton for not getting someone blacker.

[cougar]

Good baserunning by Mango.

[Lurch]

If we somehow managed to acquire Grady Sizemore, I bet JdJO would criticize Drayton for not getting someone blacker.

Too articulate?

[Gleek]

Lets see if that "Ivey" league education helps him at the plate..  I'm really getting delerious at this point.  Comon BRAD.

[Gleek]

shit

[Amy]

Too articulate?

Too pasty.  Maybe both.

[homer]

Lucas is a fucking idiot.

[Gleek]

Lucas is a fucking idiot.

yup

[Amy]

B G O!!  B G O!!

[Gleek]

please, please, please, please, please, please ... shit that looked like a strike to me, fuck i'll take it.

[Zac D]

If we somehow managed to acquire Grady Sizemore, I bet JdJO would criticize Drayton for not getting someone blacker.

I gotta be missing something here.

[Amy]

I gotta be missing something here.

Sizemore's father is at least part African American, but Grady looks just about as white as anyone.

[Gleek]

load 'em up.

[homer]

BGO HBP.

[Amy]

Getting closer to that HBP record!  Come on PENCE!!!

[cougar]

Bidge didn't even have to lean/turn into that one.

[MikeyBoy]

Lucas is a fucking idiot.

Worrell button broke?

[mihoba]

Plunk, now PENCE!!!

[Zac D]

Sizemore's father is at least part African American, but Grady looks just about as white as anyone.

Check.

C'mon Hunter!

[homer]

Son of a bitch. Gunther looked awful in that at bat.

[cougar]

God that strike 3 just sat there doing NOTHING.

[mihoba]

Ugh.

[remy]

fugly mother of god.

[Gleek]

PENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DAMMIT, i was soooooooooo ready for that walk off.

[Amy]

Killing me.  They're goddamn killing me.

[MikeyBoy]

Fuck he pulls off bad.

[Gleek]

Killing me.  They're goddamn killing me.

You i gotta be up @ 3:30 AM!

[Zac D]

Gleek is actually going to kill himself.

You gotta think Orosco pitches the next inning for NYM.

[Gleek]

Gleek is actually going to kill himself.

You gotta think Orosco pitches the next inning for NYM.

I might have some cats around the house that could be in serious danger!

[Amy]

You i gotta be up @ 3:30 AM!

3:30??  Screw it, stay up.  It'll be easier.

[gwat]

white as anyone.

? Sorry, that sounded clumsy. It's a damn good thing you have big tits.

[Amy]

? Sorry, that sounded clumsy. It's a damn good thing you have big tits.

Well, I was going to say "as white as I am" but since you don't know what I look like I didn't think that would be very effective.

[Lurch]

The Police alert...

[Gleek]

3:30??  Screw it, stay up.  It'll be easier.

Nah, maybe in the highschool/college days, but if i can squeeze in 4 hrs i'll be fine.

[Savage]

I really like Albers.

And a damn fne performance so far by the much maligned bullie.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

 Way to go Matt!

[remy]

Okay, could someone (wearing white) please end this shit.

I'm looking at you Carlos.

[Amy]

The Police alert...

Which channel?

[Lurch]

Which channel?

NBC, but I'm pissed already.

[Zac D]

NBC, but I'm pissed already.

Is that Kanye?

[Lurch]

Is that Kanye?

I'm just going to pretend that never happened.

[cougar]

Carlos, why don't you pull one of those please?

[homer]

I'm just going to pretend that never happened.

?

[Amy]

I can't wait 'til that fucker leaves town.

[gwat]

I'm just going to pretend that never happened.

DiTTo. No rappee on Message in a Bottle.

[cougar]

Well, I've got week old Chinese food that needs to be reheated for dinner.  Be right back.

[Lurch]

?

Beyond horrid.  For some fucking reason they put Kaney West and John Mayer up there.  The Fucking Police do not need guest stars.  Especially dick wads that yell over the whole song.  So, so ugly.

[Gleek]

Shit, i hate to admit it, but i may not make it through the rest of this game.  Nah, fuck it, i'm here to stay. Fuck!

[Amy]

So we've got Moehler in the pen and Scott and Munson on the bench, right?  Did I forget anyone?

[Zac D]

DiTTo. No rappee on Message in a Bottle.

C'mon. "Put your hands in the air and wave 'em like you just don't care." GROUNDBREAKING SHIT.

[Savage]

Well, I've got week old Chinese food that needs to be reheated for dinner.  Be right back.

OK.. this extra innings affair has transformed my saturday night dinner out with the husband to ordering dominos pizza.  there better be an astros win for this kind of sacrifice.

[Gleek]

So we've got Moehler in the pen and Scott and Munson on the bench, right?  Did I forget anyone?

Well, at least i won't be up much longer.

[homer]

So we've got Moehler in the pen and Scott and Munson on the bench, right?  Did I forget anyone?

McLemore?

[Zac D]

So we've got Moehler in the pen and Scott and Munson on the bench, right?  Did I forget anyone?

McLemore?

ETA: Owned, by 9 seconds. I tip my cap to you.

[BatGirl]

who do we have available to pinch hit if this thing continues?
munson?  who else?
(sorry, i got here late and i've been playing catch up)

[MikeyBoy]

McLemore?

Plus Sampson and Jennings.

[homer]

Plus Sampson and Jennings.

I was just about to say that. They won't be pitching for a while.

[Lurch]

who do we have available to pinch hit if this thing continues?
munson?  who else?
(sorry, i got here late and i've been playing catch up)

Apparently McLemore

[homer]

OK.. this extra innings affair has transformed my saturday night dinner out with the husband to ordering dominos pizza.  there better be an astros win for this kind of sacrifice.

Its been a good game, irregardless. And Albers is fucking dealing.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Albers is looking great.

[Amy]

Albers made Green look like he's been retired for a couple of years.

[MikeyBoy]

OK.. this extra innings affair has transformed my saturday night dinner out with the husband to ordering dominos pizza.  there better be an astros win for this kind of sacrifice.

You don't have a better delivery option?

[MikeyBoy]

Its been a good game, irregardless. And Albers is fucking dealing.

Literally.

[homer]

who do we have available to pinch hit if this thing continues?
munson?  who else?
(sorry, i got here late and i've been playing catch up)

scott, jennings.

[Amy]

You don't have a better delivery option?

That's what I was thinking.  Domino's is a BIIIIIG sacrifice.

[Gleek]

Fuck, keep Fat Albers in if he's gonna keep this shit up!

[Savage]

Its been a good game, irregardless. And Albers is fucking dealing.

Husband just sat down to watch with me now that cubs and milwaukee games are over.  Says "who is this Albers guy?   He's making everyone look foolish."

[cougar]

DiTTo. No rappee on Message in a Bottle.

Hey, it worked for Sting and Puff Diddy on "Every Breath You Take".

[Anit]

nice catch by chris burrrrrpalmeiro as brownie put it

[Gleek]

Hey, it worked for Sting and Puff Diddy on "Every Breath You Take".

I just threw up in my mouth a little.

[Zac D]

This inning break brought to you by Nelson's Dutch Farms chocolate ice cream.

[Amy]

OK, that looked like it hurt.

[cougar]

I just threw up in my mouth a little.

I could barely type it without grimacing.

[Gleek]

Shit, shake it off at least he's on base.

[homer]

Deion Sanders is fucking annoying.

[Savage]

You don't have a better delivery option?

No.  I live in the valley in los angeles.  I have no good delivery pizza, no decent chinese food and absolutely nothing even resembling good bar-b-que.   it's a fucking wasteland.

[BatGirl]

Hey, it worked for Sting and Puff Diddy on "Every Breath You Take".

no.  no it didn't.  no.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

shake it off and rub some dirt on it.

[gwat]

SHIT.

Sorry. Don't care for Kanye's WINDBREAKING addition to the Police's performance. That's just me though.

[Gleek]

good bunt.

[Lurch]

Hey, it worked for Sting and Puff Diddy on "Every Breath You Take".

How is Sting in an Elevator not on youtube?

[Amy]

No.  I live in the valley in los angeles.  I have no good delivery pizza, no decent chinese food and absolutely nothing even resembling good bar-b-que.   it's a fucking wasteland.

How about Mexican?  That's the worst part about my ten year exile in Northern Virginia--no decent Mexican food.  Might as well eat Taco Bell, literally.

[chuck]

OP is a bunting fool.

[cougar]

Orlando Palmeiro, bunter extraordinaire.

[Savage]

i've seen this before.

better end better this time bradley.

[mihoba]

It's deja vu all over again.

[cougar]

Sorry. Don't care for Kanye's WINDBREAKING addition to the Police's performance. That's just me though.

Kanye farted into the mic?

"KANYE WEST DOES NOT CARE ABOUT THE ENVIRONMENT!"

*cut to a panicked Mike Meyers, then a befuddled Chris Rock*.

[Savage]

How about Mexican?  That's the worst part about my ten year exile in Northern Virginia--no decent Mexican food.  Might as well eat Taco Bell, literally.

Ah, the mexican is excellent.  though different from the mexican you get in texas.

I sympathize.. i spent 10 years in DC.  I did find one really good mexican restaurant on the hill (good enough that we had our rehersal dinner there and not a single complaint from my houstonian clan).  they made excellent tamales.

[chuck]

How about Mexican?  That's the worst part about my ten year exile in Northern Virginia--no decent Mexican food.  Might as well eat Taco Bell, literally.

I haven't lived in the DC area for better than ten years, but I am very surprised that some enterprising Mexican hasn't figured out how to open a taqueria somewhere in the area. Where are you, more or less? I bet you can find something decent in the outer reaches. There were some good Salvadoran places here and there when I was living in the area. I used to live across 16th from Mt Pleasant, and there were some OK places there. No Mexican, though, you're right about that.

[Amy]

Lucas really needs to shut the fuck up.

[Gleek]

Kanye farted into the mic?

"KANYE WEST DOES NOT CARE ABOUT THE ENVIRONMENT!"

*cut to a panicked Mike Meyers, then a befuddled Chris Rock*.

We should name our next major hurricane Kanye, just so we have something worth yelling at when it hits.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Man, Luke just needs to get a hit.

[gwat]

Kanye farted into the mic?

Yeah, then he threw it into the crowd. A guy in a wheelchair caught it. It was a bad toss.

[cougar]

We should name our next major hurricane Kanye, just so we have something worth yelling at when it hits.

Well, Sheila Jackson Lee WAS complaining about the lack of black names for hurricanes...

[Amy]

I haven't lived in the DC area for better than ten years, but I am very surprised that some enterprising Mexican hasn't figured out how to open a taqueria somewhere in the area. Where are you, more or less? I bet you can find something decent in the outer reaches. There were some good Salvadoran places here and there when I was living in the area. I used to live across 16th from Mt Pleasant, and there were some OK places there. No Mexican, though, you're right about that.

Fredericksburg, Virginia.  They have some chain around here whose name escapes me at the moment that's like half Mexican, half Irish.  ACK!!

[BatGirl]

noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

[Amy]

QUIT HITTING IT THERE YOU DUMB MOTHERFUCKERS!!!!!

[cougar]

I HATE THAT MOTHERFUCKER!!

[mihoba]

Motherfucker, I hate that bastard.

[homer]

Fuck that guy. Right in his fucking mole.

[Gleek]

Well, Sheila Jackson Lee WAS complaining about the lack of black names for hurricanes...

Shit i take it back.  Just to piss her off.  FUCK BELTRAN!!

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Hate that fucker.

[remy]

Hate has just turned into I hope he dies.

[Savage]

I FUCKING HATE THAT MOTHER FUCKER!

[94CougarGrad]

Notice to Astros longballers: Quit hitting to center field, for Chrissakes.

[chandler44]

Carlos, thank you for denying me sleep.

[homer]

Fredericksburg, Virginia.  They have some chain around here whose name escapes me at the moment that's like half Mexican, half Irish.  ACK!!

Haggis Tacos?

[remy]

Methinks the BBGs are just about ready to stop giving us so many chances.

[matadorph]

Cougar really needs to shut the fuck up.

FIFY

[Lurch]

Beltran just Kayna'd Luke.  Sadly, we're going to see that catch for years to come.  And Bruntletts great DP just got bumped from the highlight reel.

[94CougarGrad]

Carlos, thank you for denying me sleep.

You didn't need it anyway.

[Amy]

Fuck that guy. Right in his fucking mole.

Carlo$, take this quarter, go downtown and have a rat gnaw that thing off your face.  Bastard.

[Gleek]

Hate has just turned into I hope he dies.

I hope he dies has just turned into he is a nihilist and must die!

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Fredericksburg, Virginia.  They have some chain around here whose name escapes me at the moment that's like half Mexican, half Irish.  ACK!!

MacSanchez?

[Zac D]

Garner should send Albers back out there with a fake mustache and glasses.

[chandler44]

You didn't need it anyway.

Apparently not.

[cougar]

FIFY

I'll talk whenever I want, fuck you very much.

[remy]

I have an idea.

I'm going to go walk the dogs.

It usually works.

[Amy]

MacSanchez?

I think it's called Carlos O'Kelly's.

[Zac D]

MacSanchez?

Benitogan's?

[MikeyBoy]

That bitch Beltran is destroying my calm.

[chuck]

Haggis Tacos?

Haggis is Scottish, dude. Come on. Colcannon tacos. Rarebit fajitas. Bangers and frijoles. Clamato poured in your Guinness.

[gwat]

Oh he ain't so bad. Who? Lucas? Beltran? DQ? Taco Bell? What the shit, fuck em all. Yesterday!!!!!!

[matadorph]

admit it: you knew he was gonna get to it.

anyone spare some mouthwash to get the vomit taste out of my mouth?

[94CougarGrad]

I have an idea.

I'm going to go walk the dogs.

It usually works.

Yeah, something good happened when you walked the pooches a couple games ago. I've had beer and not much sleep since then, so I don't remember what the hell it was, but it was good.

[T. J.]

Goddamn.  The Puerto Rican Whore just made me get out the laptop to log on to the GZ.  Fuck, what a catch.

Anybody watching Live Earth during the commercials?  What a suckfest.

[Gleek]

Apparently not.

No but I do, so fuck can we please end this Motherfucker in the bottom of this inning!

[gwat]

MacSanchez?

That would be O'Sanchez.

[homer]

Haggis is Scottish, dude. Come on. Colcannon tacos. Rarebit fajitas. Bangers and frijoles. Clamato poured in your Guinness.

Yeah, sorry about that. I lose.

[matadorph]

I'll talk whenever I want, fuck you very much.

shut the fuck up with the political bullshit. Spack wouldn't approve.

[94CougarGrad]

admit it: you knew he was gonna get to it.

anyone spare some mouthwash to get the vomit taste out of my mouth?

Ranch dressing.

[gwat]

Haggis Tacos?

That is a Scot dish, my friend.

[homer]

admit it: you knew he was gonna get to it.

anyone spare some mouthwash to get the vomit taste out of my mouth?

It looked like it popped out or moved around for a brief second...

[BatGirl]

It looked like it popped out or moved around for a brief second...

too...many...jokes......

[Savage]

ok, i'm breaking out the big guns.

my last shiner.  and i can't just stroll on down to the local grocery and pick between regular and 98...

[cougar]

shut the fuck up with the political bullshit. Spack wouldn't approve.

Politics?  Since when is the environment politics?  And that was what, almost 10 pages ago?  Get the sand out of your your vagina and use the "ignore" button if you want.

[matadorph]

It looked like it popped out or moved around for a brief second...

yeah, he almost snowconed it.

Beltran up. i can't watch.

[94CougarGrad]

It looked like it popped out or moved around for a brief second...

That's what SHE said.

[Zac D]

yeah, he almost snowconed it.

Beltran up. i can't watch.

He's 0-6. What could possibly go wrong?

[Gleek]

He's 0-6. What could possibly go wrong?

Oh, shit you didn't go there...

[Lurch]

He's 0-6. What could possibly go wrong?

You suck.

[cougar]

He's 0-6. What could possibly go wrong?

A lot.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Can't watch Moehler pitch.

[Gleek]

shut the fuck up with the political bullshit. Spack wouldn't approve.

I'm sure he wouldn't, but if it's okay to talk about the great green gay party, then it's ok and appropriate even for us to comment on it. Just my opinion.

[94CougarGrad]

Oy. A walk. Moehler about to dissolve into a puddle of putty?

[Amy]

If Moehler was going to put the bastard on anyway, he could have at least drilled the fucker.

[matadorph]

Whatever happens, Albers' performance tonight was a tremendous positive.

[94CougarGrad]

If Moehler was going to put the bastard on anyway, he could have at least drilled the fucker.

That's the spirit... aim for the kneecaps.

[Gleek]

Whatever happens, Albers' performance tonight was a tremendous positive.

Agreed.

[homer]

Good job Moehler. Make him a winner.

[Amy]

That's the spirit... aim for the kneecaps.

Fuck that, take care of that mole for him.

[T. J.]

Never any doubt. 

[matadorph]

And reverT's great job against two rightys.

I'm sure I wasn't the only one who was thinking bad thoughts then. Proved me wrong.

[T. J.]

Whatever happens, Albers' performance tonight was a tremendous positive.

That's no shit.  Impressive as hell.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Good job Moehler. Make him a winner.

4000 club for Homer!

[chuck]

I'm sure he wouldn't, but if it's okay to talk about the great green gay party, then it's ok and appropriate even for us to comment on it. Just my opinion.

You dumb motherfucker, you owe the "great green gay party" an environmentally friendly blowjob for 2000.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

You dumb motherfucker, you owe the "great green gay party" an environmentally friendly blowjob for 2000.

Stop it. Don't feed the bears.

[MikeyBoy]

Lucas says the Astros will not be looking for a center fielder for a long time. Whatevs.

[T. J.]

Wish he'd extended that hitting streak a couple times earlier, but I'll take it now.

[cougar]

It took Googly Eyes 7 ABs, but he got his hitting streak to 7 games.

[Amy]

Lucas says the Astros will not be looking for a center fielder for a long time. Whatevs.

Gotta stop listening to him.

[matadorph]

END THIS MOTHERFUCKER NOW

[Zac D]

Resurrected Zombie Aaron Sele pitching.

[T. J.]

I'm SHOCKED, SHOCKED, with the IBB.

[homer]

Lucas says the Astros will not be looking for a center fielder for a long time. Whatevs.

For being at all the games, its impressive that Lucas doesn't actually watch them.

[Amy]

Mo, hit the ball goddammit!!

[chandler44]

Who would've guessed a team would rather face Ensberg than Lee?

[homer]

Gunther needs to be standing on 3rd.

[austro]

Silly Mets. Why do they think Ensberg would hit into a double play? Unless it's a strike 'em out, throw 'em out DP, it ain't happening.

[matadorph]

VAMOS MO

Swing. the. bat.

[T. J.]

Strike 1 was the pitch to hit.  Goddammit Morgan. 

[BatGirl]

fantastic.

[Lurch]

Silly Mets. Why do they think Ensberg would hit into a double play? Unless it's a strike 'em out, throw 'em out DP, it ain't happening.

You suck, too.

[austro]

Fuck me.

[Amy]

GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING SHITHEAD!!

[matadorph]

asdfasdfasfoairujoajkflaskjdfoia uerkz salfknBS(oow-lijfsn9fuw0poe jtkpweorpovn9.s f;alsdmgloesjrk-pyoljp;gvaoj egrpolzmcxv.zlx mkcvl; km>LL K p'w1123320283991111111111!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[cougar]

Christ, was Morgan walking on his hands down the line?  You could have timed him with an hourglass!

[chandler44]

I'm even more shocked that it worked.

[gwat]

Silly Mets. Why do they think Ensberg would hit into a double play? Unless it's a strike 'em out, throw 'em out DP, it ain't happening.

sigh

[remy]

Yeah, something good happened when you walked the pooches a couple games ago. I've had beer and not much sleep since then, so I don't remember what the hell it was, but it was good.

Well, me and my dogs walked back in the front door the exact second that Shitberg did his thing.  Blah.

But we did get charged by a feral cat on our walk, so that was kinda cool... Okay I almost shit my pants.

[T. J.]

Fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck.  Guess I have to go get another beer.  I thought I had enough in my bloodstream for the night, but apparently not.  My liver says "fuck you very much Ensberg."

[remy]

Mo, hit the ball goddammit!!

Be careful what you wish for.

[gwat]

You could have timed him with an hourglass!

With a sundial.

[Clark in Denver]

Silly Mets. Why do they think Ensberg would hit into a double play? Unless it's a strike 'em out, throw 'em out DP, it ain't happening.

The BBGs looked down upon austro and delivered him a firm smack to the side of his head.

[matadorph]

So who's left in the bullpen? McLemore?

Where's Jason Lane when you need him?

[ybbodeus]

Forgive me if this has already been proposed, but is Billy Hatcher available for an at bat?

[MikeyBoy]

Aaron fuckin Sele? Isn't he the Mets pitching coach?

[austro]

Fuck me.

Sorry, Lurch, that wasn't directed at you.  I meant it in the "I suck" way.

[Lurch]

With a sundial.

With a calendar.  Chinese.

[Amy]

My cat just came out for the second time tonight to see if the game was over.  She's bewildered that it's still going on.

[T. J.]

Well, me and my dogs walked back in the front door the exact second that Shitberg did his thing.  Blah.

But we did get charged by a feral cat on our walk, so that was kinda cool... Okay I almost shit my pants.

\
If it's any consolation, this did make me laugh.

[austro]

Well, NASCAR's over, maybe we'll get a drive-by posting by Kevin.

[Lurch]

Sorry, Lurch, that wasn't directed at you.  I meant it in the "I suck" way.

Shame is your penence.

[Gleek]

You dumb motherfucker, you owe the "great green gay party" an environmentally friendly blowjob for 2000.

i will end all political discussion now, and i do honestly apologize for the "great green gay party" comment, it was out of line.  product of lack of sleep and alcohol.  Can we please end this game now?

[BatGirl]

so.....we've gotta go to 17 innings on 7-7-07?

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

My cat just came out for the second time tonight to see if the game was over.  She's bewildered that it's still going on.

My dog's been doing the I gotta crap dance by the door for an inning and a half.

[chuck]

For being at all the games, its impressive that Lucas doesn't actually watch them.

Well, they usually keep him sequestered in a foxhole down there where I doubt he can see much of anything other than the next ad he's supposed to read.

Or, maybe he realizes that the Astros have five first basemen on the team, only one of whom can effectively play first base at a time, and one of whom can sort of play center, better than Roger Cedeno at least, and so there he will stay.

[austro]

so.....we've gotta go to 17 innings on 7-7-07?

77 innings.

[Lurch]

My cat just came out for the second time tonight to see if the game was over.  She's bewildered that it's still going on.

Nah, she's just tired as fuck after chasing that guy and his dog

[Gleek]

77 innings.

Damn, beat me to it.

[chuck]

My cat just came out for the second time tonight to see if the game was over.  She's bewildered that it's still going on.

What does she care? She thinks baseball is boring?

[gwat]

\
If it's any consolation, this did make me laugh.

It made me laugh as well. I was just wondering what sort of bell the feral beast was sporting on its Hello Kitty collar.

[Amy]

That was ugly Lamb.

[cougar]

Lamb looked like a baby giraffe taking it's first steps when he was fielding that one.

[Gleek]

What does she care? She thinks baseball is boring?

Wad up a piece of tin foil and throw it to her, you might be suprised how well this works.

[Amy]

What does she care? She thinks baseball is boring?

No, she gets scared away by all the screaming and cheering.  But she can only go so many innings without demanding some attention.

[remy]

Nah, she's just tired as fuck after chasing that guy and his dog

I really thought I was going to have to punt it... but I was wearing flipflops, so I really wasn't looking forward to that either.  It all happened in a flash.  Damn thing stopped about 6 feet in front of us and arched its skinny nasty back and made a scary hissing noise.

[Gleek]

Lamb looked like a baby giraffe taking it's first steps when he was fielding that one.

Fuck it the baby giraffe got the out.

[remy]

Hey Burke almost bought himself another 3 years on the roster with that swing.

[Lurch]

I really thought I was going to have to punt it... but I was wearing flipflops, so I really wasn't looking forward to that either.  It all happened in a flash.  Damn thing stopped about 6 feet in front of us and arched its skinny nasty back and made a scary hissing noise.

Quit now, the hole only gets deeper from here

[cougar]

Hey Burke almost bought himself another 3 years on the roster with that swing.

Yeah, but it wasn't the 18th.  Still too early for him.

[matadorph]

steM offense is slumping hard if they can't get a run in 2 IP off Moehler.

One of the good guys needs to end this game now.

[T. J.]

My dog's been doing the I gotta crap dance by the door for an inning and a half.

Do you think your dog's lack of shit of some kind of lucky charm?  I've got news for you.  You're gonna have shit in the floor soon whether or not this game ends soon.

[Gleek]

Hey Burke almost bought himself another 3 years on the roster with that swing.

This is funny, and true.  It's funny because it's true. -- Homer Simpson

[homer]

steM offense is slumping hard if they can't get a run in 2 IP off Moehler.

One of the good guys needs to end this game now.

Good guy offense impotent v. Sele as well.

[Gleek]

Where the fuck is alkie, anyone know?  I miss that bastard.

[chuck]

No, she gets scared away by all the screaming and cheering.  But she can only go so many innings without demanding some attention.

What the fuck have you been cheering about?

[T. J.]

Well she's sexy and seventeen....

[matadorph]

When is Wags coming in?

[Amy]

What the fuck have you been cheering about?

I meant in general.  Mostly screaming and cursing tonight.

[T. J.]

Actually pretty impressed at the crowd that is still there.

[MikeyBoy]

I really thought I was going to have to punt it... but I was wearing flipflops, so I really wasn't looking forward to that either.  It all happened in a flash.  Damn thing stopped about 6 feet in front of us and arched its skinny nasty back and made a scary hissing noise.

What kind of pussy ass dog are you rollin' with?

[remy]

Where the fuck is alkie, anyone know?  I miss that bastard.

Looking at his profile, he has been logging on but just not posting.  Someone musta done pissed em off real good.

[Frobie]

What are all you guys still doing up?

I haven't decided whether this game is compelling or just a battle to see who drops the ball first.  Not that the two are mutually exclusive, of course.

[homer]

Burke throws funny.

[Gleek]

When is Wags coming in?

Never, but that avatar has got some serious wags to it.

[JaneDoe]

This thread is now tied for #4 in number of posts all time.  Except, after this post it will be #4 all by its lonesome.

[Gleek]

Looking at his profile, he has been logging on but just not posting.  Someone musta done pissed em off real good.

Ahhhh, I think I might know what happened, but i can't share because he may not want me to.

Dude if you're reading this shit, bring your sorry ass back here, some of us miss your jilted sense of humor!

[BatGirl]

don't act childish in here - we won't stand for it!

[BatGirl]

nice!  sounds like there was a collision in the broadcast booth over that foul...

[Zac D]

There should be at least two pickoff attempts between every pitch.

[remy]

Shit.  Here we go.

[homer]

Son of a bitch.

[cougar]

Shitfuck.

[Gleek]

don't act childish in here - we won't stand for it!

childish?  nah, just trying to show some small level of respect, it's the least i can do.

[Savage]

i don't like how this is going.

[Lurch]

Lucus still fielding the "where's JD?" emails.  Keep it up folks, good stuff.

[Amy]

I find it amusing the number of times Lucas has reassured the emailers that JD will be back.

[remy]

Lucus still fielding the "where's JD?" emails.  Keep it up folks, good stuff.

Lucus?   That's awful close to Mucus.

Wait... I like it.

[remy]

Hey lookie there, a clutch hit.

[cougar]

Son of a whore.  Anyone but that cocknose.

[Gleek]

I find it amusing the number of times Lucas has reassured the emailers that JD will be back.

Damn, I fucking miss JD.

[Anit]

national media is gonna have fun with this one..

[Savage]

FUck, fuck, fuck.

i really hate this guy.

[Amy]

I knew Moehler should've amputated that mole last time he was up.

[matadorph]

Oh yay Wagner is gonna pitch.

[94CougarGrad]

What's this about hating Beltran? Can't imagine why. He's just an asshole.

[gwat]

Supernova.

[94CougarGrad]

Oh, golly gee, let's let 'em have ANOTHER run.

Round Rock Donuts anyone?

[Amy]

Ausmus playing 1B?

[HudsonHawk]

I don't understand having the infield in now that you're already done by a run.  Play for 2, clean this inning up and be only one run down.

[Lurch]

Smashing Pumpkins alert on Universal HD

[homer]

I don't understand having the infield in now that you're already done by a run.  Play for 2, clean this inning up and be only one run down.

Wondering the same.

[BatGirl]

that was the stems 17th hit of the night.
17th.  on 7-7-07, in the 17th.

i'm just sayin.

[T. J.]

It's not like it's unexpected.  He was 0-6 tonight.  Plenty of opportunities to win this one (and maybe still will be.)

[chuck]

I don't understand having the infield in now that you're already done by a run.  Play for 2, clean this inning up and be only one run down.

I don't understand bunting when the certain result will be to take the bat out of your best hitter's hands.

[94CougarGrad]

Ausmus playing 1B?

Nope, Munson.

[Amy]

Oh god, Gar has lost it.  Lamb playing RF.  Maybe he's been hitting the Shiner too.

[94CougarGrad]

Oh god, Gar has lost it.  Lamb playing RF.  Maybe he's been hitting the Shiner too.

Bad moves = bad beer. Don't insult the Shiner.

[Gleek]

Okay guys and gals, now that we're down 2 runs and Wagner is coming in to close it out, I must bid you Adieu.  This has something to due with the fact that i must be up for work in 4 1/2 hrs, Nevertheless, i shall see you all soon, good night and good luck (McLemore).

[HudsonHawk]

I don't understand bunting when the certain result will be to take the bat out of your best hitter's hands.

To move a runner into scoring position.  It's a fairly common baseball tactic.

[94CougarGrad]

Nitey nite... sleep should be better than this.

[Bill McLuggage]

Smashing Pumpkins alert on Universal HD

Caught the Live Earth peformance tonight.  That new album can't come out soon enough (Tuesday)

New bass player's a hottie, by the way.

[Amy]

Bad moves = bad beer. Don't insult the Shiner.

Sorry.  They probably don't serve Shiner in the dugout anyway, just that Miller and Bud crap.  You gotta go hunt down the good stuff yourself at MMP.

[Zac D]

Randolph really rolled the dice in not using Wagner before this point. At the moment, looks as though the gamble'll pay off.

[T. J.]

It could be worse.  You could be watching Smashing Pumpkins on channel 297 on "Live Earth".    What a suckfest that has been today.  Good cause, terrible concerts.

[HudsonHawk]

Bad moves = bad beer. Don't insult the Shiner.

Why is that a bad move?

[Amy]

What the fuck was LoDuca swinging at?  Not that I'm complaining, mind you.

[matadorph]

PENCE!!! vs. Wagner.

Could be innuresting.

[cougar]

Okay guys and gals, now that we're down 2 runs and Wagner is coming in to close it out, I must bid you Adieu.  This has something to due with the fact that i must be up for work in 4 1/2 hrs, Nevertheless, i shall see you all soon, good night and good luck (McLemore).

Nothing is over until we say it is!  Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?!

[94CougarGrad]

Why is that a bad move?

I was responding to her "bad move" comment. Mostly just so she wouldn't dis the Shiner.

[remy]

17 innings on 7/7/07.  Creepy.

G'night boys and girls.

[94CougarGrad]

Nothing is over until we say it is!  Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?!

Germans?

[Amy]

Germans?

Leave it, he's rolling.

[T. J.]

Fucking whole plug of Red Man in Wagner's cheek after 5 hours of waiting.

[94CougarGrad]

Leave it, he's rolling.

We need the dues.

[Garfield3d]

As a small comparison:

Pitcher      IP      PC     H    ER     BB    K
Williams   7.2    112     5   3   1      6
Albers       2.0     20     0    0    0     3
Moehler   2.1    55    5   2   2    0

It took Moehler half as many pitches and less than 1/3 of Williams innings to give up the same number of hits and more walks.

Albers has started a few times, so I would hope that he has some stamina in games.. I know Garner wanted to send in a pinch hitter for a scoring opportunity, but when you're going late into the innings, don't you want to play for endurance and reliability?  I had thought that perhaps he would have just kept Albers in for hitting, as the Mets did for Sele.

  --Garfield3d

[T. J.]

17 innings on 7/7/07.  Creepy.

G'night boys and girls.

Bullshit.  13's pitching.

[chuck]

To move a runner into scoring position.  It's a fairly common baseball tactic.

I might have seen it happen before. You know as well as I do that the chance of a runner scoring from first with no one out is greater than his chance of scoring from second with one out. And that doesn't take into account the fact that you are certainly taking the bat out of Lee's hands. I think it was a fucking stupid move.

[cougar]

Leave it, he's rolling.

And it ain't over yet.  'Cause when the going gets tough...





The tough gets going!  Who's with me?  LET'S GO! Heyyyyyyyheyyyyyheyyyy....

[T. J.]

There ya go.  Fuck you Wags.

[Bill McLuggage]

How many player no-shows for photo day tomorrow morning?  (Junction Jack doesn't count since he blacked out drunk in the 6th)

[homer]

As a small comparison:

Pitcher      IP      PC     H    ER     BB    K
Williams   7.2    112     5   3   1      6
Albers       2.0     20     0    0    0     3
Moehler   2.1    55    5   2   2    0

It took Moehler half as many pitches and less than 1/3 of Williams innings to give up the same number of hits and more walks.

Albers has started a few times, so I would hope that he has some stamina in games.. I know Garner wanted to send in a pinch hitter for a scoring opportunity, but when you're going late into the innings, don't you want to play for endurance and reliability?  I had thought that perhaps he would have just kept Albers in for hitting, as the Mets did for Sele.

  --Garfield3d

So, you don't like Moehler?