The real reason Clemens signed with the astros...

[texasjoshua]

I sent this to the official astros site in reguards to the ten year contract we have with Clemens and to the real reason Clemens signed with the astros in the first place...

I'll admit, I was blinded by how good of a pitcher he happens to be...and it was nice to finally get past the Braves in the playoffs. But it all makes sense now...I was wrong. Roger Clemens is a heartless, money hungry, attention hog. EVERYTHING he does is about maximizing his profile and his bank-roll. Including the move to Houston.
 
I believe that he really thought he might be done after leaving the yankees...he thought that he might not be able to pitch at the amazing level everyone had become used to. Then as the season got near (and as the Astros begged him) he thought, "Well I'll be living around Houston anyway...people will applaud me just for trying to help my "hometown" club out...and there'll be half the pressure of New York...", it was almost like he thought Houston was a better place to see if he could still "do it". That explains the incredibly low salary he agreed to. Ofcoarse, then it turned out he could. (which explains his huge pay increase the next year.) 
 
So, now he knows he can still dominate...so what does he do? Even though he has been embraced by the city, has a son in our minor league sytem, pitched to us in spring training, LIVES HERE...what does he do? He does what he has always done...tries to squease as much of the spotlight, not to mention as much cash, out of his talent as he can. He only came to Houston because he wasn't sure he could still pitch at a..."new york level"...think about it.
 
You are right about one thing though. We are going to be stuck with him and this contract. Him and his cold black heart.
 
joshua           

[Taras Bulba]

Thanks, Joshua.  It all makes sense now.

[Curly]

How did we not see this?

[Alkie]

This is one of teh best posts ever!!1.

Thank you son, for sharing with us proof that people should be taxed and licensed to use the internet.  Bravo.

[Trey]

This is one of teh best posts ever!!1.

Thank you son, for sharing with us proof that people should be taxed and licensed to use the internet.  Bravo.

Screw that.  They just need to restrict it to those above ten years old.  Like we do with cigarettes.

[strosrays]

Pope is Catholic!  This just in.

Thanks for highlighting that last part.  I might've missed it, otherwise.

[ValpoCory]

So, now he knows he can still dominate...so what does he do?   

Well, after winning the Cy Young as an Astro in 2004, he signed with the Astros.  And he did it again the next year.

[HurricaneDavid]

Ofcoarse, you'll be sure to let us know when "the official astros site" gets back to you.

ETA: I'm always dumbfounded by people who capitalize SOME words, ("Houston," "Astros," etc.) but then FAIL to capitalize their own name.

[MRaup]

Take the last train to Clarksville, and I'll meet you at the station...

Its like a flippin infestation lately.

[pravata]

Wait, wait just a minute.  Clemens pitched for the Astros !  When?!  What happened to Toronto?

[strosrays]

Take the last train to Clarksville, and I'll meet you at the station...

Its like a flippin infestation lately.

As if this thread couldn't get any sillier. . .

Monkees song lyrics, of all things.

[Jacksonian]

Here's your sign.

[Ty in Tampa]

Thanks, joshua. When the Astros get back to you, give them my reguards.

[Rebel Jew]

Him and his cold black heart


Ha!

[Phil_in_CS]

Here's your sign.

You see his post there? (same email)

How about we trade Lidge when he's hot?  We'd get something good out of it. Here's an idea:

Send Lane, Lidge, Ensberg, Burke for A-ROD (next year) and then spend some big moolah (next year) for A.JONES.

We'd have the most feared lineup in baseball with Oswalt, Jennings, Sampson/Wandy and pay to get one more good pitcher.

Bet we can talk them into picking up the rest of A-ROD's salary too!

[Lefty]

There was a time when I believed that you belonged to me
But now I know your heart is shackled to a memory
The more I learned to care for you,the more we drifted apart
Why cant I free your doubtful mind and melt your cold black heart

[texasjoshua]

There was a time when I believed that you belonged to me
But now I know your heart is shackled to a memory
The more I learned to care for you,the more we drifted apart
Why cant I free your doubtful mind and melt your cold black heart

hehehe...funny.

[JimR]

hehehe...funny.

now, run along. recess is over.

[texasjoshua]

now, run along. recess is over.

what does that even MEAN?!

[MRaup]

what does that even MEAN?!

You want to know what it really means?

[JimR]

what does that even MEAN?!

well...fuck off, and go away.

got it?

[ValpoCory]

GET the FUCK out OF here!

[texasjoshua]

You want to know what it really means?

uhhhhh, ok.

[Duder]

"Him and his cold black heart."

This line was by far the best.

[Lurch]

I'll be changing my screen name now...

[JimR]

I'll be changing my screen name now...

and mothers everywhere who named a child Joshua are rushing to get name change forms

[texasjoshua]

GET the FUCK out OF here!

guess it's hard to convey sarcasm...you must think I was being serious with this letter...whatever...go stros.

later.

[Lurch]

and mothers everywhere who named a child Joshua are rushing to get name change forms

'

First "Bubba" and now this

[JimR]

guess it's hard to convey sarcasm...you must think I was being serious with this letter...whatever...go stros.

later.

hey, is this a record for entrance/exit?

[matadorph]

"Him and his cold black heart."

This line was by far the best.

yeah, barely edging out "think about it".
 

[MRaup]

hey, is this a recond for entrance/exit?

He's only reached the 2nd level of trollism. Just wait.

[VirtualBob]

guess it's hard to convey sarcasm...you must think I was being serious with this letter...whatever...go stros.

later.

We can hope. can't we?  But you're probably right.

[MusicMan]

If texasjoshua posts crap like this as a result of his stupidity, but his stupidity results from his lack of childhood educaton, does this imply that texasjoshua lacks free will?

[JimR]

He's only reached the 2nd level of trollism. Just wait.

that series of steps needs to be pinned at the top.

[MRaup]

If texasjoshua posts crap like this as a result of his stupidity, but his stupidity results from his lack of childhood educaton, does this imply that texasjoshua lacks free will?

His dad was one of the most respected educators you've ever met, though!

[texasjoshua]

I thought it was funny, it was mostly sarcastic, I didn't send it to the astros...

what a bunch of pleasant guys you all are, don't worry you won't have to worry bout seeing me again...dicks.

your fellow astros fan,

joshua








dicks

[MusicMan]

"joshua dicks" is an unfortunate name.  Good luck getting through grade school.

[MRaup]

I thought it was funny, it was mostly sarcastic, I didn't send it to the astros...

what a bunch of pleasant guys you all are, don't worry you won't have to worry bout seeing me again...dicks.

your fellow astros fan,

joshua








dicks

Don't let the door hit your ass on the way out, Chachi.

[Bench]

I thought it was funny, it was mostly sarcastic, I didn't send it to the astros...

what a bunch of pleasant guys you all are, don't worry you won't have to worry bout seeing me again...dicks.

your fellow astros fan,

joshua








dicks

Fantastic exit.

What was the point of your screed if you didn't even bother sending it to the Astros? I think that's a great touch to the whole thread.

[Taras Bulba]

"joshua dicks" is an unfortunate name.  Good luck getting through grade school.

thanks.  just sprayed water all over the desk.

[MRaup]

thanks.  just sprayed water all over the desk.

That one caused me to tab off the page real fast as to not have to explain what the hell was so funny to my coworkers.

[Ty in Tampa]

Wow, I kind of feel sorr....

Nah.

[MRaup]

The really impressive thing, I think, was that that was posted here to try and impress us with his dazzling wit.

Whoops.

[Phil_in_CS]

The really impressive thing, I think, was that that was posted here to try and impress us with his dazzling wit.

Whoops.

He's in the top 3% of IQ's, I'd bet.

[Limey]

"Him and his cold black heart."

This line was by far the best.

I believe his heart is actually green.

[Limey]

Wow, I kind of feel sorr....

Nah.

Never, never, never feel sorry.  Clarks who wash up here and post without taking a moment to see what the fuck's going on are one small step up from telemarketers and BMW satisfaction surveyors.

[ValpoCory]

That one caused me to tab off the page real fast as to not have to explain what the hell was so funny to my coworkers.

Too late for me.  Two people in my office stared at me wondering why I was laughing out loud.

[Andyzipp]

Never, never, never feel sorry.  Clarks who wash up here and post without taking a moment to see what the fuck's going on are one small step up from telemarketers and BMW satisfaction surveyors.

Don't you get it?!?  He's not serious. He was never serious.  We're all the ones who took it wrong.  Joshua Dicks has mad sarcasm skills.

[ValpoCory]

Don't you get it?!?  He's not serious. He was never serious.  We're all the ones who took it wrong.  Joshua Dicks has mad sarcasm skills.

But wait, Dicks said he's leaving, never to return.  He's not gonna be able to see these posts and advance to the 3rd level of trollism.

[otterjb]

I sent this to the official astros site in reguards to the ten year contract we have with Clemens and to the real reason Clemens signed with the astros in the first place...

I'll admit, I was blinded by how good of a pitcher he happens to be...and it was nice to finally get past the Braves in the playoffs. But it all makes sense now...I was wrong. Roger Clemens is a heartless, money hungry, attention hog. EVERYTHING he does is about maximizing his profile and his bank-roll. Including the move to Houston.
 
I believe that he really thought he might be done after leaving the yankees...he thought that he might not be able to pitch at the amazing level everyone had become used to. Then as the season got near (and as the Astros begged him) he thought, "Well I'll be living around Houston anyway...people will applaud me just for trying to help my "hometown" club out...and there'll be half the pressure of New York...", it was almost like he thought Houston was a better place to see if he could still "do it". That explains the incredibly low salary he agreed to. Ofcoarse, then it turned out he could. (which explains his huge pay increase the next year.) 
 
So, now he knows he can still dominate...so what does he do? Even though he has been embraced by the city, has a son in our minor league sytem, pitched to us in spring training, LIVES HERE...what does he do? He does what he has always done...tries to squease as much of the spotlight, not to mention as much cash, out of his talent as he can. He only came to Houston because he wasn't sure he could still pitch at a..."new york level"...think about it.
 
You are right about one thing though. We are going to be stuck with him and this contract. Him and his cold black heart.
 
joshua           

ASTROz rulZ!!!

[Limey]

Don't you get it?!?  He's not serious. He was never serious.  We're all the ones who took it wrong.  Joshua Dicks has mad sarcasm skills.

Sarchasm:  (n.) The abyss between the creator of witticisms and the intended recipient who does not find the humor in it.

[Curly]

Holy shit that was fun.

[JackAstro]

But wait, Dicks said he's leaving, never to return.  He's not gonna be able to see these posts and advance to the 3rd level of trollism.

I had to go back and check, but he's actually made it through step 10, having skipped a couple along the way. There's still a really solid chance that we're going to get to step 12 before starting over. I'm excited.

[ValpoCory]

I had to go back and check, but he's actually made it through step 10, having skipped a couple along the way. There's still a really solid chance that we're going to get to step 12 before starting over. I'm excited.

Fucking hilarious. 

[Limey]

I had to go back and check, but he's actually made it through step 10, having skipped a couple along the way. There's still a really solid chance that we're going to get to step 12 before starting over. I'm excited.

I have a bottle of fizz ready to go.

[Ty in Tampa]

I had to go back and check...

Whenever I go to that page, my day stops for a few minutes.

[Froback]

what does that even MEAN?!

Quit being a FUCKING 10 yr old tool and get the hell out of here!  (or something like that)

[matadorph]

This thread has officially been Youtubed.

Now that's gotta hurt!

[JimR]

damn, this is one hilarious thread.

is Mr. Dicks gone for good?

[remy]

is Mr. Dicks gone for good?

His profile is deleted -- he be gone.

[drew corleone]

pwn3d!

[JimR]

man, this was funny.

[ValpoCory]

His profile is deleted -- he be gone.

Another aspect of trollism is after the ordeal, they go back to their home boards and trash OWA for the next few years.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Another aspect of trollism is after the ordeal, they go back to their home boards and trash OWA for the next few years.

How is that possible?

[ValpoCory]

You see his post there? (same email)
Bet we can talk them into picking up the rest of A-ROD's salary too!

Hell, I made a disparaging post on that thread and was banned from the site.  I had over 1,000 posts on there from back in the day, but one use of the word moron gets me banned.  No loss, as it'd been 2 years since my last post.

[JimR]

Hell, I made a disparaging post on that thread and was banned from the site.  I had over 1,000 posts on there from back in the day, but one use of the word moron gets me banned.  No loss, as it'd been 2 years since my last post.

using "moron" on that site likely is like using "asshole" on the TZ: it applies to too many people.

[mihoba]

Hell, I made a disparaging post on that thread and was banned from the site.  I had over 1,000 posts on there from back in the day, but one use of the word moron gets me banned.  No loss, as it'd been 2 years since my last post.

Banned by Barzilla. I noticed he left up the post where you kissed his arse.

You've went to the dark side, you should have known you could never return to that lovefest.

[JimR]

Banned by Barzilla. I noticed he left up the post where you kissed his arse.

You've went to the dark side, you should have known you could never return to that lovefest.

kissing Barzilla's ass should get him banned here.

[HudsonHawk]

Hell, I made a disparaging post on that thread and was banned from the site.  I had over 1,000 posts on there from back in the day, but one use of the word moron gets me banned.  No loss, as it'd been 2 years since my last post.

What site and what thread was this?

[mihoba]

What site and what thread was this?

I was just giving ValpoCory some grief, but here it is. I'm assuming he was Astros98.

[Ty in Tampa]

I was just giving ValpoCory some grief, but here it is. I'm assuming he was Astros98.

My eyes are bleeding.

[HudsonHawk]

I was just giving ValpoCory some grief, but here it is. I'm assuming he was Astros98.

I meant the part where someone was trashing OWA

[JackAstro]

My eyes are bleeding.

Oh my God, why... WHY did I click that link? Is that really how the other half lives? That's just unbelievable. Can you even imagine the thunder and fury if someone opened a thread in here with shit that incredibly weak? It's one thing to visit a board where people post shit like that, it's altogether another to actually respond to it as though it's a legitimate point of discussion. May God have mercy on their souls.

[subnuclear]

My eyes are bleeding.

Did you notice that Barzilla was the one defending Everett as, perhaps, not the worst SS in the majors? 

[Waldo]

Can you even imagine the thunder and fury if someone opened a thread in here with shit that incredibly weak?

The Barzilla thread was historic.

[Ty in Tampa]

The Barzilla thread was historic.

We should hang that up top like a severed head for all newcomers to see.

[JackAstro]

The Barzilla thread was historic.

Truly. It just went on forever - there was a lifetime worth of comedy gold in there. If OWA ever gets a stadium, that thread should be retired and raised to the rafters on opening day.

[MRaup]

God, I hate you all. I can't stop looking at that pile of shit message board now.

Its like a 6 car pileup on the other side of the highway.

[MusicMan]

I kicked the habit, you can too.

[strosrays]

Ass-zilla is "down" with OBP.  Gotta maintain his street creds.

[homer]

Hell, I made a disparaging post on that thread and was banned from the site.  I had over 1,000 posts on there from back in the day, but one use of the word moron gets me banned.  No loss, as it'd been 2 years since my last post.

They banned you for "moron"? Barzilla is some how in charge over there? WTF...

[Phil_in_CS]

I kicked the habit, you can too.

Look at how long it took Prav to quit the chronicle

[JaneDoe]

Look at how long it took Prav to quit the chronicle

are you sure he quit?

[Limey]

are you sure he quit?

He wishes he knew how to something something.

[pravata]

They banned you for "moron"? Barzilla is some how in charge over there? WTF...

Should have said, "some say Barzilla is a moron".  Completely innocent.

[pravata]

are you sure he quit?

Furthermore, I'm encouraging everyone I know to ignore the sports section. (However, if they have a quote that I can't find somewhere else, I may use it.)

[Lefty]

Ass-zilla is "down" with OBP.  Gotta maintain his street creds.

Dear god.  Not sure that line evidenced street cred even back in 1990 or whenever that was.

[ValpoCory]

You see his post there? (same email)
Bet we can talk them into picking up the rest of A-ROD's salary too!

Not sure if Joshua Dicks is filmtexas79 over there.  According to this site, filmtexas79 is Nick Medrano out of San Antonio.

http://p196.ezboard.com/Looking-for-J3-Photo/fwarbirdsforumfrm7.showMessage?topicID=128.topic

[strosrays]

Dear god.  Not sure that line evidenced street cred even back in 1990 or whenever that was.

He's the Gangsta Stat Boy.

What's funny is, if you (attempt to) actually read the crap he spews out... like a sheltered suburban white boy trying to appear "cool" by using what he thinks is the latest street jargon, I don't think Ass-zilla really even understands the statistics he swears fealty to.  Which means he is entirely worthless.

[HurricaneDavid]

Damn, I was hoping to see the big "X" avatar.

[UnholyToledo]

I don't think Ass-zilla really even understands the statistics he swears fealty to.  Which means he is entirely worthless.

So, that's the reason!

[UnholyToledo]

Also, just have to add my applause for the entertainment.  That was a classic...his follow-up posts as he slowly realized all was not what it seemed...priceless.  So long dicks, we hardly knew ya!

By the way, just to clear this up, the reason Clemens signed with the Astros is, he likes money.  You heard it here first!

[Lurch]

Also, just have to add my applause for the entertainment.  That was a classic...his follow-up posts as he slowly realized all was not what it seemed...priceless.  So long dicks, we hardly knew ya!

By the way, just to clear this up, the reason Clemens signed with the Astros is, he likes money.  You heard it here first!

Clark on Clark violence is HOT!

[Limey]

Clark on Clark violence is HOT!

Cripple Fight?

[Navin R Johnson]

Douchezilla, published a book and once asked for a meeting with the Tal Smith's secretaries cousin.    He drives a DODGE STRATUS!

 

[matadorph]

They banned you for "moron"? Barzilla is some how in charge over there? WTF...

Funny, I got banned yesterday for calling some of them "drooling spazzes."   

[homer]

Funny, I got banned yesterday for calling some of them "drooling spazzes."  

So, do they tell you that you are banned or do they just selectively delete your posts and close your account?

Do they tell the other members that you have been banned, and why?

[matadorph]

My post was deleted and I cannot access the board under my login info.

Banned!

[homer]

My post was deleted and I cannot access the board under my login info.

Banned!

Fucking drooling spazz morons.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

He's the Gangsta Stat Boy.

What's funny is, if you (attempt to) actually read the crap he spews out... like a sheltered suburban white boy trying to appear "cool" by using what he thinks is the latest street jargon, I don't think Ass-zilla really even understands the statistics he swears fealty to.  Which means he is entirely worthless.

I never could get past his poor grammar, spelling, editing... etc., to appreciate the lack of substance.

[UnholyToledo]

Clark on Clark violence is HOT!

what does that even MEAN?!

[JaneDoe]

My post was deleted and I cannot access the board under my login info.

Banned!

And now they have put up a warning headline just for you guys. 

[Astroholic]

And now they have put up a warning headline just for you guys. 

What does it say something like this.  If you are going to use curse words like 'moron', 'dudie', etc. this board is not for you.  Please refrain from being a meany to our respected members.

[Ty in Tampa]

Essentially, yeah.

#1 - involving how you treat the members here, attacking, name-calling, cussing out and so forth. That flat out will not be tolerated and is one of the quickest ways to get you banned.

[Andyzipp]

What does it say something like this.  If you are going to use curse words like 'moron', 'dudie', etc. this board is not for you.  Please refrain from being a meany to our respected members.

What in the hell is a dudie?!?

[JaneDoe]

What in the hell is a dudie?!?

I think he meant "doodie", a cutsey name for doodoo.

[astrox]

Ass-zilla is "down" with OBP.  Gotta maintain his street creds.

I can't believe he actually has that as his signature.  You've got to be kidding.

[Andyzipp]

I think he meant "doodie", a cutsey name for doodoo.

You're fuckin kidding me.  I can understand no vulgarity rules...I don't agree with them, but I understand them...but you literally can't use the word doodie?  What if you're talking about Caddy Shack?

I suppose the following are completely out as well...

1. Bake a brownie
2. Bake a loaf
3. Bake a potato
4. Bake a russet
5. Barbarians at the gate
6. Big brown man knocking on the back door
7. Blow Mud
8. Bomb the Bowl
9. Build a dookie castle
10. Carpet bombing
11. Choke a brownie
12. Choke a darkie
13. Chop a log
14. Commit yourself to the dumpatorium
15. Conduct a movement
16. Cook a brown carrot
17. Cook a brown kielbasa
18. Cook a butt burrito
19. Cook a meat loaf in the porcelain saucepan
20. Cook some chocolate
21. Cook some fudge
22. Cook some sausage
23. Cook up a pot of anal stew
24. Crap
25. Curl some pipe
26. Debulk
27. Defecate
28. Disembowel
29. Disemfiber
30. Do the Royal Squat
31. Doo-doo
32. Download some brownware
33. Draw mud
34. Drill for mud bunnies
35. Drop
36. Drop Loggy Log
37. Drop Smokies
38. Drop a bomb
39. Drop a brown trout
40. Drop a deuce
41. Drop a dookie
42. Drop a load
43. Drop a log
44. Drop a stool
45. Drop anchor
46. Drop the kids off at the lake
47. Drop wolf bait
48. Drop your ordinance
49. Dump
50. Dump a stump
51. Enjoy a meatball sandwich
52. Evacuate
53. Fill the peanut butter jar
54. Float a trout
55. Give birth to a Marine
56. Give birth to a packy
57. Go Fecen'
58. Go into labor
59. Grow a Tail
60. Hatch a new boss
61. Hatch a new superintendent
62. Have a shit
63. Heave a Havana
64. Hit paydirt
65. Launch a Butt Shuttle
66. Launch a torpedo
67. Lay a brick
68. Lay a cable
69. Lay a log
70. Lay some cable
71. Load the crapper
72. Log out
73. Make a core dump
74. Make a delivery
75. Make a deposit
76. Make a deposit at the porcelain bank
77. Make a doo-doo
78. Make a log entry
79. Make grunt sculpture
80. Make mud
81. Make room for lunch
82. Make some fertilizer
83. Offload some freight
84. Pack your underwear
85. Paint the bowl
86. Paint with the brown stuff
87. Park some bark
88. Park your breakfast
89. People who like sausages shouldn't see how they're made!!
90. Pinch a loaf
91. Plant some corn
92. Play at the Toilet Bowl
93. Poke the turtle's head out
94. Poop
95. Punish the porcelain
96. Put fruit in the bowl
97. Recycle fiber
98. Release your payload
99. Ride the hoop
100. Roll a Nut Log
101. Roll a log
102. Saw off a log
103. Seek revenge for the Brown Bomber
104. Shake a brown bomber
105. Shit
106. Sink a link
107. Sink a sausage
108. Sink the Bismark
109. Sit on the bowl
110. Sit on the can
111. Sit on the throne
112. Sjvsdtta en barkbet
113. Snap a log
114. Spray and wipe
115. Squat
116. Squeeze a coily
117. Squeeze a loaf
118. Squeeze one out
119. Squeeze the cheese
120. Stain the porcelain
121. Study at the Library
122. Taint the cloth
123. Take a Schroeder
124. Take a Doogie
125. Take a dump
126. Take a growler
127. Take a load off your mind
128. Take a shit
129. Take a steamer
130. Test the plumbing
131. Visit the toilet for a poo-poo
132. Void your bowels
133. Zap the porcelain

[Lurch]

6. Big brown man knocking on the back door

I was with you until you went racist.  That's unacceptable. (some say)

[Bench]

I was with you until you went racist.  That's unacceptable. (some say)

Yes. How dare you discriminate against greenish diarrhea!

[remy]

46. Drop the kids off at the lake

I like "pool" better.

[strosrays]

What does it say something like this.  If you are going to use curse words like 'moron', 'dudie', etc. this board is not for you.  Please refrain from being a meany to our respected members.

Not only that, in the same post, he issued an edict against off-topic threads, and thread hi-jacking.

Not the kind of world I'd want to live in.  No, sir.

[JaneDoe]

Not only that, in the same post, he issued an edict against off-topic threads, and thread hi-jacking.

Not the kind of world I'd want to live in.  No, sir.

Peace, love, harmony, hummus and kumbaya after the game instead of frito pie?  Who would wanna live there?

[pravata]

Not only that, in the same post, he issued an edict against off-topic threads, and thread hi-jacking.

Not the kind of world I'd want to live in.  No, sir.

Simple declarative sentences with contrary information will make some of them cry.  So you have to be careful. 

[Ty in Tampa]

OWA=frito pie

[ValpoCory]

I like "pool" better.

Although so does Jessica Simpson, so it lost some points.

[JaneDoe]

Anybody check out our "newest" member:Today at 12:05:42 AM? 

He's back.

[remy]

Anybody check out our "newest" member:Today at 12:05:42 AM? 

He's back.

I doubt it.  That could very, very, very easily just be a gimmick account.  Have an admin crossreference the IP addresses if he posts. 

[Astroholic]

What in the hell is a dudie?!?

You know exactly what I meant.