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Author Topic: Words fail me  (Read 5605 times)

pravata

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Words fail me
« on: March 12, 2007, 01:29:08 pm »
Fans, I give you, Richard Justice

And then the fans turned against Chris Burke.
Posted by Richard at March 11, 2007 11:21 AM

...I was one of many people who couldn't wait to see how Chris Burke would do when the Astros put him in the lineup and left him there.

That was yesterday, friends. His time has passed. Sorry, Chris. ...

You're a has-been at 26. ... Why did this happen? Because you began spring training with a bad stretch. ... Think of that. Some want to throw you out of the clubhouse because of 27 spring ABs. ...

Here's the deal. A lot of people will read this post and think, ''Exactly! The idiot sportswriter finally got it right.'' The truth is, friends, that the people who've already decided that Hunter Pence should be on the team and that Chris Burke (or anyone else) should be benched are complete idiots.

... Nothing has been decided. Nor should anything be decided at this point. The thing is, I think Chris Burke is done in the eyes of fans. ....nothing will change their opinion. ...


My opening day lineup would be...
Posted by Richard at March 12, 2007 08:54 AM

Thoughts on a spring training scorecard...

? If today was opening day, I'd go with: Biggio 2b, Pence cf, Berkman 1b, Lee lf, Ensberg 3b, Scott rf, Everett ss, Ausmus c. Who plays when Biggio doesn't and what would that do to the lineup? I always assumed Chris Burke would end up being the everyday leadoff hitter, but he's going to have to pick it up to win a spot.

Spring training stats can be monumentally misleading, but in a competitive environment they're all you have to go on. ...


Tip your wait staff.
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Duder

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #1 on: March 12, 2007, 01:53:50 pm »
Wow.
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Craig

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #2 on: March 12, 2007, 02:04:36 pm »
That must have been one hell of a teaparty in Pinwheel's head Sunday afternoon. Polly Prissy Pants is a fucking loose cannon these days. Like Christina Ricci in "Black Snake Moan," before Lazarus ties her slutty ass up with a 40-pound chain.
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SeanBergmanRules

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #3 on: March 12, 2007, 02:07:57 pm »
Real cool.  Make fun of the guy with multiple personality disorder.
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MusicMan

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #4 on: March 12, 2007, 02:16:27 pm »
Quote:

Like Christina Ricci in "Black Snake Moan," before Lazarus ties her slutty ass up with a 40-pound chain.



I.  Must.  See.   This.  Movie.
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Craig

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #5 on: March 12, 2007, 02:27:12 pm »
Quote:

Quote:

Like Christina Ricci in "Black Snake Moan," before Lazarus ties her slutty ass up with a 40-pound chain.



I.  Must.  See.   This.  Movie.



This weekend the movie choice came down to seeing 300 sweaty, oily men doing manly things, or Christina Ricci running around in her panties for like an hour.

Richard Justice obviously saw a different movie than I did, or he would have known how to cure Polly Prissy Pants of her wicked, wicked ways.
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MusicMan

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #6 on: March 12, 2007, 02:32:09 pm »
Quote:

This weekend the movie choice came down to seeing 300 sweaty, oily men doing manly things, or Christina Ricci running around in her panties for like an hour.



And yet the former was the one that made $70 million.  Defies logic, doesn't it?
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Limey

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #7 on: March 12, 2007, 02:33:23 pm »
Quote:

I.  Must.  See.   This.  Movie.


No nudity and Justin Timberlake.  It's all yours.
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MusicMan

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #8 on: March 12, 2007, 02:38:23 pm »
Quote:

Quote:

I.  Must.  See.   This.  Movie.


No nudity and Justin Timberlake.  It's all yours.



I was certain that "courageous, daring performance" was code for "lots of naked".

I'm crushed.
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I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing AstroTurf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, torture of Bud Selig.

pravata

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #9 on: March 12, 2007, 02:56:07 pm »
Quote:

... (Justice)
Spring training stats can be monumentally misleading, but in a competitive environment they're all you have to go on. ...



I think a slap fight might break out,

Ortiz blogs this quote The Link  "I think we've made the commitment that this is a kid who sat for two years and waited for his opportunity to play," Purpura said of Burke. "He's a big-game player. I don't think you judge a player just on a week and a half of spring (and then say) he's in danger or losing a job. That's ridiculous."

".... We take a lot more longer-term view of these things than other folks do. You have to. As I've been saying probably every spring since I've had this job, I've learned a long time ago you don't evaluate players solely on spring training performance and the other one is solely winter ball performance because they will fool you."

Pinwheel, Spring Training is not all they have to go on.  It's all the media and the fans have to go on.  Are  the minor league games/seasons irrelevant?
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das

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #10 on: March 12, 2007, 03:13:18 pm »
 
Quote:

...the other one is solely winter ball performance because they will fool you.



I wonder if this is a vieled reference to Hildago.
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Another trenchant comment by a jealous lesser intellect.

Craig

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #11 on: March 12, 2007, 03:14:46 pm »
Quote:

Quote:

Quote:

I.  Must.  See.   This.  Movie.


No nudity and Justin Timberlake.  It's all yours.



I was certain that "courageous, daring performance" was code for "lots of naked".

I'm crushed.



There was definitely nakedness in the version I saw. The camera didn't linger too long though, probably because they didn't want anyone to notice the scars from her boob reduction.

Of course I saw them anyway.
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Fredia

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #12 on: March 12, 2007, 03:39:53 pm »
 
Quote:

  Spring training stats can be monumentally misleading, but in a competitive environment they're all you have to go on. ...


 That might be the understatement of the year. so many inflated stats. that might not reflect the true value of a player. if i remember corrrectly that one year the astros tore it up in spring training became the season from hell
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pravata

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #13 on: March 12, 2007, 03:42:26 pm »
Quote:

Quote:

...the other one is solely winter ball performance because they will fool you.



I wonder if this is a vieled reference to Hildago.



Not veiled at all.
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Limey

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #14 on: March 12, 2007, 04:07:44 pm »
Quote:

There was definitely nakedness in the version I saw. The camera didn't linger too long though, probably because they didn't want anyone to notice the scars from her boob reduction.

Of course I saw them anyway.


Boob reductions are an affront to God.  See Connelly, Jennifer,  before and  after.
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Foghorn

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #15 on: March 12, 2007, 04:17:49 pm »
Quote:

Quote:

There was definitely nakedness in the version I saw. The camera didn't linger too long though, probably because they didn't want anyone to notice the scars from her boob reduction.

Of course I saw them anyway.


Boob reductions are an affront to God.  See Connelly, Jennifer,  before and  after.



he hee heh heh  

boobs


heh heh ha heh hee heh
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toddthebod

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #16 on: March 12, 2007, 07:35:37 pm »
It's amazing that you bring this up.  Because as I was watching Blood Diamond over the weekend, all I kept thinking about was what happened to Jennifer's boobs.  Of course, she's still smoking hot.
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pravata

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #17 on: March 12, 2007, 10:43:09 pm »
Is it possible to have a thread simply devoted to making fun of Richard Justice without bringing up the abominations of breast reduction?  Can we focus?
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Jacksonian

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #18 on: March 12, 2007, 10:58:11 pm »
Quote:

Is it possible to have a thread simply devoted to making fun of Richard Justice without bringing up the abominations of breast reduction?  Can we focus?



If you don't see breast reductions as metaphorical for Richard Justice then you're just dead to me.
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homer

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #19 on: March 12, 2007, 11:17:44 pm »
Quote:

Is it possible to have a thread simply devoted to making fun of Richard Justice without bringing up the abominations of breast reduction?  Can we focus?



Bro, the first step is admitting you have a problem.
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pravata

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #20 on: March 12, 2007, 11:39:50 pm »
Quote:

Quote:

Is it possible to have a thread simply devoted to making fun of Richard Justice without bringing up the abominations of breast reduction?  Can we focus?



Bro, the first step is admitting you have a problem.



I can quit anytime.
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Phil_in_CS

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #21 on: March 13, 2007, 09:32:45 am »
Quote:

Quote:

Quote:

Is it possible to have a thread simply devoted to making fun of Richard Justice without bringing up the abominations of breast reduction?  Can we focus?



Bro, the first step is admitting you have a problem.



I can quit anytime.



Quit boobs?  or quit making fun of Richard Justice?
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Froback

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #22 on: March 13, 2007, 11:08:35 am »
Quote:

Quote:

Quote:

Quote:

Is it possible to have a thread simply devoted to making fun of Richard Justice without bringing up the abominations of breast reduction?  Can we focus?



Bro, the first step is admitting you have a problem.



I can quit anytime.



Quit boobs?  or quit making fun of Richard Justice?


Why would you want to quit either?  Although if I had to give up one... <deleted really dirty sounding comment that was not meant to be dirty>
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Col. Sphinx Drummond

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #23 on: March 13, 2007, 11:36:49 am »
Boob reductions?!?!?!? There is no Justice...
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Lefty

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #24 on: March 13, 2007, 11:38:25 am »
Quote:

It's amazing that you bring this up.  Because as I was watching Blood Diamond over the weekend, all I kept thinking about was what happened to Jennifer's boobs.  Of course, she's still smoking hot.


She's come a long way from topless by the lake in "The Hot Spot" and riding the department store mechanical pony in "Career Opportunities".  Those were nice.

[insert Limey YouTube clips here]
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Limey

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #25 on: March 13, 2007, 11:42:13 am »
Quote:

Is it possible to have a thread simply devoted to making fun of Richard Justice without bringing up the abominations of breast reduction?  Can we focus?


Any mention of Richard Justice will make me think of a huge boob.  Either that, or an enormous penis.
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Limey

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #26 on: March 13, 2007, 11:45:23 am »
Quote:

Quote:

It's amazing that you bring this up.  Because as I was watching Blood Diamond over the weekend, all I kept thinking about was what happened to Jennifer's boobs.  Of course, she's still smoking hot.


She's come a long way from topless by the lake in "The Hot Spot" and riding the department store mechanical pony in "Career Opportunities".  Those were nice.

[insert Limey YouTube clips here]


I'm sure that "riding the mechanical pony" is a euphemism for something.  If it isn't, it should be.
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pravata

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #27 on: March 15, 2007, 01:45:31 pm »
Quote:

Fans, I give you, Richard Justice

And then the fans turned against Chris Burke.
Posted by Richard at March 11, 2007 11:21 AM

...I was one of many people who couldn't wait to see how Chris Burke would do when the Astros put him in the lineup and left him there.

That was yesterday, friends. His time has passed. Sorry, Chris. ...

You're a has-been at 26. ... Why did this happen? Because you began spring training with a bad stretch. ... Think of that. Some want to throw you out of the clubhouse because of 27 spring ABs. ...

Here's the deal. A lot of people will read this post and think, ''Exactly! The idiot sportswriter finally got it right.'' The truth is, friends, that the people who've already decided that Hunter Pence should be on the team and that Chris Burke (or anyone else) should be benched are complete idiots.

... Nothing has been decided. Nor should anything be decided at this point. The thing is, I think Chris Burke is done in the eyes of fans. ....nothing will change their opinion. ...


My opening day lineup would be...
Posted by Richard at March 12, 2007 08:54 AM

Thoughts on a spring training scorecard...

? If today was opening day, I'd go with: Biggio 2b, Pence cf, Berkman 1b, Lee lf, Ensberg 3b, Scott rf, Everett ss, Ausmus c. Who plays when Biggio doesn't and what would that do to the lineup? I always assumed Chris Burke would end up being the everyday leadoff hitter, but he's going to have to pick it up to win a spot.

Spring training stats can be monumentally misleading, but in a competitive environment they're all you have to go on. ...


Tip your wait staff.



Full circle,

(Pinwheel 3/14)"For Tim Purpura, the bottom line is that Chris Burke has earned the opportunity to be out there on opening day. ''It's his time to play everyday,'' Purpura wrote in an e-mail.  I can't argue with him ." The Link
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Astroholic

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #28 on: March 15, 2007, 02:09:06 pm »
reminds me of a song  "Wheels keep on spinning round spinning round and round"  -Cake.
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VirtualBob

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #29 on: March 15, 2007, 02:30:55 pm »
At this rate, if someone ever nails his other foot to the ground he'll be in trouble.
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strosrays

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Re: Words fail me
« Reply #30 on: March 15, 2007, 03:59:31 pm »
Quote:

reminds me of a song  "Wheels keep on spinning round spinning round and round"  -Cake.




With the talk of boobs, I was thinking more along the lines of some early '80s Joe Walsh:

"They come in twos
It's hard to choose
Your favorite tit..."
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