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General Discussion => Talk Zone => Topic started by: ferret on November 18, 2011, 08:53:31 am

Title: Change the name
Post by: ferret on November 18, 2011, 08:53:31 am
The banner on astros.com displays the blasphemous conceit "We are YOUR Astros".  A more insulting pile of bullshit I can not imagine.  Here's what MLB thinks,

"Listen,” (the unnamed MLB) official said on Tuesday, “we understand that Houston has been a National League city for (50) seasons, and there’s some resistance about moving. We also understand there could be some damage (to the franchise), ...
http://blog.chron.com/ultimateastros/2011/11/15/crane-to-receive-70-million-discount-for-astros-switch-to-american-league/

We understand, we just don't care.   Take the team, leave the name.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: subnuclear on November 18, 2011, 08:57:18 am
I endorse 100%. Its not like they have anything to do with space stuff any more.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: MusicMan on November 18, 2011, 09:00:15 am
We are YOUR Houston Lackeys.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: Houston on November 18, 2011, 09:06:19 am
Suggestions:

Houston Buds
Texas Rangers Jr.
Minute Maid Nolans
Houston Wehaveaproblems
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: MusicMan on November 18, 2011, 09:07:18 am
Suggestions:

Houston Buds
Texas Rangers Jr.
Minute Maid Nolans
Houston Wehaveaproblems

Texas Stepchildren
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: Ty in Tampa on November 18, 2011, 09:12:05 am
Houston Sycophants
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: hostros7 on November 18, 2011, 09:13:15 am
Houston Catchers
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: MusicMan on November 18, 2011, 09:15:45 am
Houston Catchers

We have a winner.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: Limey on November 18, 2011, 09:16:27 am
The banner on astros.com displays the blasphemous conceit "We are YOUR Astros".  A more insulting pile of bullshit I can not imagine.  Here's what MLB thinks,

"Listen,” (the unnamed MLB) official said on Tuesday, “we understand that Houston has been a National League city for (50) seasons, and there’s some resistance about moving. We also understand there could be some damage (to the franchise), ...
http://blog.chron.com/ultimateastros/2011/11/15/crane-to-receive-70-million-discount-for-astros-switch-to-american-league/

We understand, we just don't care.   Take the team, leave the name.

First rule of selling is to ensure that all objections are gone prior to closing.  The first thing to do when presented with an objection is to acknowledge or empathise with that objection...
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: Limey on November 18, 2011, 09:17:43 am
Please people.  The name has been here all along:

Bushneck Lackeys

Game over.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: The Spleen on November 18, 2011, 10:08:48 am
Houston Catchers

...where it's always the bottom of the ninth.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: Fredia on November 18, 2011, 10:10:21 am
arlington astros
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: JimR on November 18, 2011, 10:20:44 am
Nolan's Bitch
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: strosrays on November 18, 2011, 07:17:13 pm
Sold American
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: remy on November 18, 2011, 08:04:17 pm
...where it's always the bottom of the ninth.

Come from behind victories are the only kind we know.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: austro on November 18, 2011, 08:13:21 pm
Sold American

Sweet.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: Arky Vaughan on November 18, 2011, 09:51:52 pm
The American League Fuck You Buds of South Arlington.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: Reuben on November 19, 2011, 12:32:54 am
Suggestions:

Houston Buds
Texas Rangers Jr.
Minute Maid Nolans
Houston Wehaveaproblems
I think these are my favorites. Brilliant.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: D.H. on November 19, 2011, 01:53:47 am
"ferret" is being serious, and I agree with him. The team is now completely detached from the "Astros" and the name "Astros" should be retired. I think the news media, at least outside Houston, would be forced to cover any organized effort to ask this to happen. The publicity would shine a light on the subterfuge here. The Chronicle is beyond redemption, of course.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: SoonerJim on November 19, 2011, 08:39:54 am
Nolan's Bitch

I Like This One. Fits on a bumper sticker. Succinct and to the point. But Nolan Ryan's excited, and that's what counts.
Title: Change the name
Post by: geezerdonk on November 19, 2011, 11:47:08 am
The Houston Humidity.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: strosrays on November 19, 2011, 12:19:29 pm
Quote
Change the name


Done.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: The Spleen on November 19, 2011, 01:02:48 pm
Nolan's Bitch

The Houston Bitches... with a cute little French poodle as a mascot.

The Houston Slaves... with a... uh, how un-PC do we want to be? as a mascot. I guess we could settle for the South Park character.

The Houston Cattle... with a nice thick, juicy steak as a mascot.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: Reuben on November 19, 2011, 02:07:32 pm

Done.
I love the reinforcement provided by the caption under your avatar.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: SaltyParker on November 19, 2011, 05:53:49 pm
The Houston Squeal - Ned Beatty as mascot - scoreboard feature where mascot squeals like a pig when opposing team homers
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: OregonStrosFan on November 19, 2011, 06:03:19 pm
The Houston Squeal - Ned Beatty as mascot - scoreboard feature where mascot squeals like a pig when opposing team homers

You ass... In ruminating over all of the doomsday scenarios common occurrences that will result from the Astros moving to the AL West, it had not even occurred to me that I will now have to hear the theme from the Natural 9 games a season (instead of the 3 games previously). That is, until your post...  Please know that I hate you!!!
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: Ron Brand on November 20, 2011, 03:52:13 pm
Houston Junior Rangers
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: bubba on November 20, 2011, 07:10:12 pm
Houston Nutts
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: AstroFrog on November 21, 2011, 12:16:06 pm
Houston Wehaveaproblems

Underrated suggestion.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: BUWebguy on November 21, 2011, 04:29:23 pm
I've wondered about a name change since they moved into the new park. There are an awful lot of "Houston baseball" marks where you'd expect to see "Astros" (on seats, places like that).
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: Von Kaiser on November 22, 2011, 11:18:12 pm
Houston Whores
Logo - A naked Jim Crane bathing in a bathtub full of 70 one million dollar bills while being surrounded by some crying fans holding a National League flag. In the corner of the logo, Bud Selig watches Crane and masturbates.   

Houston Hot Carls
Logo - Our beloved Astrodome positioned directly underneath Bud Selig's squatting ass.

Houston Glory Holes
Logo - Jim Crane on one side, a pleased Bud Selig on the other.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: Gizzmonic on November 23, 2011, 08:19:46 am
Von Kaiser, is there no depth to your depravity?
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: hostros7 on November 23, 2011, 08:35:29 am
Von Kaiser, is there no depth to your depravity?

Seriously, Don Flamenco, maybe I'd expect him to be so scurrilous...but Von Kaiser?  Well, I just thought he'd be above that.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: Ron Brand on November 23, 2011, 08:41:23 am
"I'll give you a TKO from Tokyo!"
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: Ebby Calvin on November 23, 2011, 09:03:14 am
"I'll give you a TKO from Tokyo!"

Dude, that's Piston Honda.  Get your shit straight.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: Ron Brand on November 23, 2011, 09:07:48 am
Dude, that's Piston Honda.  Get your shit straight.

God damn. I come in here, recognize the reference, and build on it without being SO FUCKING OBVIOUS, and here you come and just shit all over it. Thanks a lot, Ebby!
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: Gizzmonic on November 23, 2011, 09:10:38 am
Seriously, Don Flamenco, maybe I'd expect him to be so scurrilous...but Von Kaiser?  Well, I just thought he'd be above that.


They made a new version of that for Wii a couple of years ago.  It's surprisingly fun.  Much more fun than what's been happening to us Astros fans lately.
Title: Re: Change the name
Post by: Fredia on November 23, 2011, 09:57:19 am
if the astro sale were a video game it would recieve an x rating for the well...you know glory hole kind of stuff. it would even make it to the soup