By Craig Elliott
I and I just split a series with the Brewers, which included a nice short-Sheet prank on Tuesday. Lance Berkman cooled off a little, in part because he keeps stopping to pick up pretty rocks on the basepaths. Wandy took a tough loss on Monday, but Nieve got his first big-league win.
I had to listen to Bob Eucker do the Tuesday game on XM, and he's almost as bad as Milo. He was caught in mid-story at the end of the game, and just blew off the final out and went on with his rambling. It was like, ?So Joe Niekro ... I think he was with the Astros then ... empties his pockets and out pops the emery board ... Gross flies out to Taveras to end the game ... and so Niekro was caught red-handed ... wasn't he with the Astros then? ... I can't remember ... anyway ...?
Anyway, the 3rds just got swept in a two-game series by the not-yet-sucking Reds, though to be fair, PooHoles, Edmonds, and Rolen all missed the second game. Both the Astros and 3rds are currently looking up at the pimply, misshapen asses of the Cincinnati Reds, but hey, it's early May. By August the Reds will be just another cinnamony turd floating down the Ohio River.
When:
Wednesday, May 3, 7:05 p.m. CDT ? FSN
Thursday, May 4, 7:05 p.m. CDT ? FSN, ESPN2
MLB Extra Innings ? Both games will be on the Fox Southwest broadcast. Thursday's game will also be on ESPN2, unless they're showing a nail-gun tournament or something.
The channel here in Arkansas that carries Astros games is a rinky-dink little station out of Little Rock. They have lots of crappy local commercials, but by the end of the game, it's like they run out of advertisements. So they just stay with the live feed while the Astros announcers think they're off the air. It's great listening. The other day against the Brewers, JD started humming ?Roll Out the Barrel,? then when told to do the disclaimer after the commercial, said: ?Disclaimer? I hardly even know her!?
Where: MMPUS
The Astros are home for two quick games with the Co-Ards, then it's on the road again for a whirlwind tour of most of the NL West. Yvette will be giving away ?K? cards Wednesday, so we can help NLCS MVP Roy Oswalt greet the Jakes in style.
Projected Matchups
Jason Marquis (3-2, 5.04) v. Roy Oswalt (4-1, 2.76)
Marquis opened the season with 3 straight wins, but has lost his last 2 starts. He's 5-2 against the Astros in 9 appearances. Ensberg and Berkman have blasted him in the past; Mo is 8-for-19 (.421) with two homers, and Berkman is 9-for-16 (.563) with a double, a triple, a homer, and 7 RBI. Other hot hitters against Marquis Mark include Bidge (9-for-26, .346, one homer), and Jason Lane (6-for-15, .400).
Roy is 5-4 against the Jakes, but I don't think that includes playoff games. Current Tardinals go 42-for-147 (.286) against him, with homers from PooHoles and Fat Lip Edmonds. Pujols is 14-for-41 (.341) overall against Oswalt, and Edmonds is 10-for-35 (.286). Edmonds also has 15 K's to go with his 10 hits. David Dickstain is also 4-for-9 against Roy.
Chris Carpenter (3-1, 1.80) v. Andy Pettitte (1-4, 5.25)
Carpenter had an excellent April, with his only loss being a 1-0 game against the Reds when he went 8 innings. He's 4-1 against the Stros in 7 appearances. Current Astros are 48-for-195 (.246) against Carpenter.
Berkman is only 5-for-14 (.267) against Carpenter, but the four hits were a double and 3 homers. Biggio is 8-for-22 (.364) but he also has 6 strikeouts. Mike Lamb is 8-for-16 with 4 doubles and a homer, so maybe we'll see him today.
Pettitte has gotten off to a crappy start, so what better time to break out of the funk than against the 3rdinals? He's 1-1 in four starts against St. Louis, with a 1.67 ERA. Hopefully Larry Bigbie won't be back from AAA yet, because he's 11-for-14 against Andy (though all but one of those hits were singles).
Juan Encarnacion is 10-for-25 (.400) against Andy, but again, all but one of the hits were singles. The only current Jake with a homer against Pettitte is Scott Rolen, and he may not play this series. Prince Albert is only 2-for-12 against Andy.
Key injuries:
St. Louis ? Pujols' back is sore from toting all that ego around the bases, but he should be back for this series. Rolen has bronchitis and is questionable; he didn't make the trip to Cincinnati. Rick Ankiel is out until late this month, and Larry Bigbie is on a AAA rehab assignment. Ricardo Rincon is also on the DL.
Houston ? Backe, Bagwell, and Appendix. Chad Qualls should be back from his grandfather's funeral for this series.
Other shit
I met a real-life BFiB over the winter ... a really nice guy. My wife and I were living temporarily in Tulsa, fixing up a house to sell. We hired a semi-retired carpenter to do some work, and as soon as he saw my gold-and-blue Astros jacket we started talking baseball. He's a diehard Cards fan, but said the Astros are his second-favorite team ... ?a team I can respect,? he said. He explained that he was at the Rangers-Astros exhibition game in 1977 when part of Oiler Park collapsed. He just missed being on the part of the walkway that cratered, and he saw a kid who was injured. Joe Ferguson was the Houston catcher then, and he gave his Astros jacket to the injured kid. So ever since, this guy has been an Astros fan. He told me he always wished the Astros good luck ... as long as the Cards take first place. ?You mean like last year?? I asked.
He also went on and on about how his son got Opening Day tickets for the Cards-Astros in 2005, and what an awesome series the Jakes had. So I told him I had tickets for Opening Day 2006 ... ?You know, the one where they're going to unveil the National League pennant.?
