So not fifteen minutes after I posted in this thread I'm sitting here at my desk minding my own business and I hear drifting through the window the opening strains of a song I don't recognize - gwankgwankgwankgwank GWANKGWANKGWANKGWANKGWANKGWANKGWANKGWANK wakkawakkawakkawakkawakkawakkawakkawakka WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE OOUUEEEKKKOOUUEEEKKKOOUUEEEKKKOOUUEEEKKK POUMPOUMPOUMPOUM pisstaboomtapisstaboomtapisstaboomtapisstaboomtapisstaboomtapisstaboomtapisstaboomtapisstaboomta
and I'm like, Did I just wake up in fucking Ibiza? I storm downstairs and out the back door and under the famous mango tree and down the road I go. There are maybe five houses on that side of the street and I expected to identify the music coming from the backyard of one of them but as I got to the final house I realized I was mistaken. It had to be coming from outside my neighborhood and across the road. There's a small soccer field over there next to a driving range. I popped out and sure enough there were lines of plastic chairs up and down the sideline and not a person in sight other than the fuckwit standing next to the stereo system that was turned to 13 or so.
What the fuck is this? Ehh? WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?!
This is as good a place as any to recognize that my general belligerence was a useful asset when I lived in New York but really not quite as useful anywhere else. Especially a happy place like Panama where strangers greet each other warmly in the elevator for fuck's sake not to mention the elaborate greetings that are mandatory when you encounter someone you might not have seen for a day or two.
Anyway, DJ Futbolfil looks at me curiously for a moment and says, It's a soccer tournament. Oh, I say, I thought you might be inaugurating an open-air gay bar.
My mom is visiting. We watched the Astros tonight. Afterwards I mentioned something about this thread and thought she might like to read it so I brought it up and set it in front of her. I passed her by a bit later and asked Did you read it? Sure, she said, I read the part that you showed me. Did you scroll through the rest of it? Blank stare. I show her how to scroll. She has her own computer, of course, and a tablet. She knows how to scroll. I think.
Did you look at the article that the first post links to? I ask. Blank stare. You see the blue text?! That's a link! Click it and it will open another page!
I walk by again a minute or two later and she's got the cursor up in the url window clicking who the fuck knows what. MOM. CLICK ON THE LINK. THE LINK. CLICK IT.
She says, I don't know why we're talking about everyone being happy in Panama and you're yelling at me.
