Texans 2014...underway

[HudsonHawk]

First preseason game, and the Texans are in mid season form: the secondary is a sieve, the special teams is...well.."special", and the QB has more interceptions inside his own 20 than he has completions. Another No. 1 pick appears to be in the bag, and a win a pipe dream.

[austro]

At least it will take us a week or two to figure out who to rail about instead of Kubiak.

[HudsonHawk]

At least it will take us a week or two to figure out who to rail about instead of Kubiak.

A few early candidates:

Brandon Harris, the worst defensive back in football.
Kareem Jackson, the second worse defensive back in football, but the best CB on the Texans.
Ryan Fitzpatrick, an interception throwing machine.
Derek Newton, every game looks like his first football game ever.
Whoever fields kicks.

[chuck]

I've spent eons wondering why the Raiders lead the league in penalty yardage year after year no matter who the coach is or who the players are.

Thirty years from now some kid in Sacramento is going to ask his father, Dad, why do the Texans always suck so bad? His father will reply, I don't know, son, that's just the way it is.

[HudsonHawk]

O'Brien said Fitzpatrick will play until he does what he needs to do.  If that's the case, he may take every preseason snap.

On a side note, the media is gonna hate O'Brien in short order. He's a major league asshole and a lousy interview. At the end of the half:

Reporter:  coach, thoughts on the first half?
O'Brien:  not good. Gotta coach better, gotta play better.

Reporter:  coach, at the quarterback position, how do you see the snaps going in the second half?
O'Brien:  not good. Gotta coach better, gotta play better.

[chuck]

The fuck you want him to say? I can't imagine he's ever been associated with such a fucked up half of football in his life.

[jbm]

Damn, I'm recording this and was hoping for some unexpected bright spots.

[austro]

Damn, I'm recording this and was hoping for some unexpected bright spots.

It's Houston. Get ready to be underwhelmed.

[HudsonHawk]

The fuck you want him to say? I can't imagine he's ever been associated with such a fucked up half of football in his life.

It would have been nice for him to be a professional and answer the question, considering it's the fans who are paying his salary and they had exactly squat to do with his team's complete lack of preparation. But I guess that's asking too much.

[HudsonHawk]

Damn, I'm recording this and was hoping for some unexpected bright spots.

A few bright spots:

J.J. Watt is still on the team
Clowney is as quick and strong as advertised.
They actually weren't terrible running the ball.

[The Spleen]

From a sideline interview with Andre Johnson:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGdc6APHfEw

[Navin R Johnson]

This Texans team feels like the 2009 Astros.  Couple good vets and a shit ton of trash.

[Bench]

This Texans team feels like the 2009 Astros.  Couple good vets and a shit ton of trash.

Especially apt comparison considering how badly the Texans have drafted the last several years is the football equivalent of the Purpura years.

[MusicMan]

Especially apt comparison considering how badly the Texans have drafted the last several years is the football equivalent of the Purpura years.

The 2013 Texans draft is already worse than missing Aiken.

[hostros7]

Especially apt comparison considering how badly the Texans have drafted the last several years is the football equivalent of the Purpura years.

But, Rick Smith is the bed rock that will serve as a foundation for all the Super Bowls.

[HudsonHawk]

The 2013 Texans draft is already worse than missing Aiken.

I'm not sure how a draft that yielded DeAndre Hopkins and D.J. Swearinger with the first two picks can already be considered an absolute bust.  As for Rick Smith led drafts, I likewise have a hard time calling guys like Duane Brown, Brian Cushing,  and J.J. Watt busts as well.

[hostros7]

I'm not sure how a draft that yielded DeAndre Hopkins and D.J. Swearinger with the first two picks can already be considered an absolute bust.  As for Rick Smith led drafts, I likewise have a hard time calling guys like Duane Brown, Brian Cushing,  and J.J. Watt busts as well.

I know that you're aware of this but you named 4.5 players over the course of his employment since 2006.

[HudsonHawk]

I know that you're aware of this but you named 4.5 players over the course of his employment since 2006.

How many superstars did you expect him to draft in 7 years?  How many others are finding loads of Pro Bowlers in the 6th and 7th rounds?  Who has Smith passed on that you think he should have drafted instead?

[Bench]

How many superstars did you expect him to draft in 7 years?  How many others are finding loads of Pro Bowlers in the 6th and 7th rounds?  Who has Smith passed on that you think he should have drafted instead?

Pendergast has a pretty good rundown of the draft shortcomings.

Some highlights from the 2013 draft:

Of the Texans' nine players drafted in 2013, four are no longer with the team. Only two teams in the NFL have let as many players from their 2013 draft class go. However, those two were both playoff teams in 2013 (Indianapolis and Super Bowl champion Seattle), so they're excused. No other team in the NFL has let that many of their 2013 draftees go, and only two have even let three go. (As a basis for comparison, half the teams in the league still had all their 2013 draftees on their rosters entering the first weekend of preseason games.)

All four departed Texans players were drafted prior to the seventh round of the 2013 draft. No other team in the league has let go of more than one player drafted before 2013's seventh round.

[HudsonHawk]

Pendergast has a pretty good rundown of the draft shortcomings.

Some highlights from the 2013 draft:

Of the Texans' nine players drafted in 2013, four are no longer with the team. Only two teams in the NFL have let as many players from their 2013 draft class go. However, those two were both playoff teams in 2013 (Indianapolis and Super Bowl champion Seattle), so they're excused. No other team in the NFL has let that many of their 2013 draftees go, and only two have even let three go. (As a basis for comparison, half the teams in the league still had all their 2013 draftees on their rosters entering the first weekend of preseason games.)

All four departed Texans players were drafted prior to the seventh round of the 2013 draft. No other team in the league has let go of more than one player drafted before 2013's seventh round.

I'm not arguing that the 2013 draft was a coup or anything, but I think they got two future pro bowlers in the first two rounds, so I'm reluctant to call it a bust at this point.  It may turn out to be. 

As for Smith in general, I just don't think lack of talent has been the Texans' problem the last five years.  In fact, with a competent head coach, I see know reason why they shouldn't have won a Super Bowl by now.

[MusicMan]

How many superstars did you expect him to draft in 7 years?  How many others are finding loads of Pro Bowlers in the 6th and 7th rounds? 

It's not about finding Pro Bowlers.  It's about finding viable starters or quality depth in the 2nd-6th rounds.  Teams like the Patriots, Steelers, Eagles - these teams excel at that.  Rick Smith has been execrable at it, which is why the comparisons to the 2009 Astros are so strong - a few star level players with absolutely nothing behind them.

[HudsonHawk]

It's not about finding Pro Bowlers.  It's about finding viable starters or quality depth in the 2nd-6th rounds.  Teams like the Patriots, Steelers, Eagles - these teams excel at that.  Rick Smith has been execrable at it, which is why the comparisons to the 2009 Astros are so strong - a few star level players with absolutely nothing behind them.

So again, who has Smith passed on that you thought at the time was a mistake?

[MusicMan]

So again, who has Smith passed on that you thought at the time was a mistake?

Fortunately, my job isn't to find quality NFL players.
Unfortunately, it is Rick Smith's job.  Can you look at this roster and tell me he's succeeding?

[HudsonHawk]

Fortunately, my job isn't to find quality NFL players.

So you complain that the players aren't quality when you admit you aren't qualified to ascertain quality?

Unfortunately, it is Rick Smith's job.  Can you look at this roster and tell me he's succeeding?

I can look at the last 6 years he's been GM and say "holy fuck there's an incredible amount of talent on this team".

[Uncle Charlie]

Rick Smith has done a pretty good job with the draft - free agency/veteran decisions, not a well in my opinion.  One only needs to look at the Ed Reed, Alan Ball, Pick 6 extension, DeMeco Ryans to name a few.

With the draft, I can only think of twice where I was yelling at the TV when a high draft pick took place - Kareem Jackson over Devin McCourty or Dez Bryant and similarly when Witney Mercilus was picked over Stephen Hill, Alshon Jeffery or Janoris Jenkins.  Granted, Mercilus probably ended up okay in that respect, but I really was pissed about the Jackson pick at the time.

[HudsonHawk]

Rick Smith has done a pretty good job with the draft - free agency/veteran decisions, not a well in my opinion.  One only needs to look at the Ed Reed, Alan Ball, Pick 6 extension, DeMeco Ryans to name a few.

What if one looked at Arian Foster, Antonio Smith, Jonathon Joseph, Danieal Manning, Wade Smith to name a few?

[Navin R Johnson]

1 thing that makes it hard to judge is having garbage at the QB position last and this year.  Even if the team was on par with the best teams in the league at every other position, you just aren't going to win regularly with shit QB play.  Not to mention Kubiak coaching...

As for the draft, 2006 was fantastic, the JJ Watt draft is great, but the rest are really meh, which is why this team OL/DL/LB/ depth charts are full of URFA and street signings.

As for Hopkins and Swearinger.  Simply no way to judge Hopkins with the QBs this team is employing.  Maybe Swearinger turns out to be a pro bowler, I would bet against that though.

[HudsonHawk]

Maybe Swearinger turns out to be a pro bowler, I would bet against that though.

I like Swearinger.  I think he's going to be a very good player.

[HudsonHawk]

As for the draft, 2006 was fantastic, the JJ Watt draft is great, but the rest are really meh, which is why this team OL/DL/LB/ depth charts are full of URFA and street signings.

Casserly was in charge of the 2006 draft.

[Limey]

Casserly was in charge of the 2006 draft.

...which was ridiculous as he was a lame duck with an insane man-love for David Carr at the time.  Casserly eschewed all the top-ranked QBs in order to protect his boy...which didn't matter because Kubiak went out and signed Matt Shaub anyway.

I am now going to go and curl up in a ball and sob for 15 - 30 minutes.

[HudsonHawk]

...which was ridiculous as he was a lame duck with an insane man-love for David Carr at the time.  Casserly eschewed all the top-ranked QBs in order to protect his boy...which didn't matter because Kubiak went out and signed Matt Shaub anyway.

I am now going to go and curl up in a ball and sob for 15 - 30 minutes.

He eschewed the top ranked QBs because they were named Vince Young, Matt Leinart and Jay Cutler.  And after they selected Mario Williams, the "top" QBs were named Tarvaris Jackson, Charlie Whitehurst and Brad Smith.

[Limey]

He eschewed the top ranked QBs because they were named Vince Young, Matt Leinart and Jay Cutler.  And after they selected Mario Williams, the "top" QBs were named Tarvaris Jackson, Charlie Whitehurst and Brad Smith.

People smarter than I (Mrs Limey, who knew him in college) are of a mind that VY would've been ok in Houston.  It was only when he was taken out of his very well constructed comfort zone and let loose in Tennessee that he imploded.  He was barely literate and highly dependent on his mother and his close friends to get through non-football related activity.

Also, Jay Cutler > Matt Shaub.

[MusicMan]

I can look at the last 6 years he's been GM and say "holy fuck there's an incredible amount of talent on this team".

Yes, you've been quite clear that Gary Kubiak was the only thing stopping this team from a Super Bowl.

So we can rest assured that the team would, at a minimum, make the playoffs this year?

[jbm]

Also, Jay Cutler > Matt Shaub.

After one half, Shaub looks > Fitzpatrick

[HudsonHawk]

People smarter than I (Mrs Limey, who knew him in college) are of a mind that VY would've been ok in Houston.  It was only when he was taken out of his very well constructed comfort zone and let loose in Tennessee that he imploded.  He was barely literate and highly dependent on his mother and his close friends to get through non-football related activity.

His family wasn't going to turn him into an NFL passer.

Also, Jay Cutler > Matt Shaub.

So you would have taken Cutler #1 overall?

[HudsonHawk]

Yes, you've been quite clear that Gary Kubiak was the only thing stopping this team from a Super Bowl.

So we can rest assured that the team would, at a minimum, make the playoffs this year?

Kubiak was the only thing keeping the 2010-2012 teams from the Super Bowl. This year's team has nowhere near that much talent.

[HudsonHawk]

After one half, Shaub looks > Fitzpatrick

You think Schaub threw a lot of picks, wait til you get a load of Fitzpatrick.

[Uncle Charlie]

What if one looked at Arian Foster, Antonio Smith, Jonathon Joseph, Danieal Manning, Wade Smith to name a few?

Foster was more of a draft type decision - NDFA.  They wanted him but didn't think they needed to spend a pick to get him.  The subsequent $'s spent on him in FA is a question mark if that was the right decision.  The others were reasonable - one could argue if the JoJo signing was good.  Manning has been okay, Smith has been good.  It's much more of a mixed bag than what he's been able to do in the draft.  That said, I suspect that given the nature of the NFL, the same can be said for many GMs regarding FA signings....they are often for too much money and too long.

[Limey]

So you would have taken Cutler #1 overall?

Not saying that.  The Texans made a huge mistake letting Casserly run the draft with the door knob stuck up his arse.  Had they let the new guys do it, they would've known they weren't staying with Carr and would've adjusted their plan accordingly.  They could've traded down and taken Cutler later, for example. 

Also, Cutler going #1 is no more weird than them actually reaching halfway down the first round and taking Williams. 

[HudsonHawk]

Not saying that.  The Texans made a huge mistake letting Casserly run the draft with the door knob stuck up his arse.  Had they let the new guys do it, they would've known they weren't staying with Carr and would've adjusted their plan accordingly.  They could've traded down and taken Cutler later, for example.  

There wasn't a new guy.  Smith wasn't hired until several months after the draft.  Perhaps they should have been quicker about it finding a GM, but the fact is they didn't have one.  And I don't know that they didn't know they weren't staying with Carr.  That wasn't entirely a lame-duck Casserly decision.  

Also, Cutler going #1 is no more weird than them actually reaching halfway down the first round and taking Williams.  

Williams at the top was in no way a reach.  He was a solid No. 1 pick, and would not have lasted past the third or fourth pick.  If you're going to criticize one of the Texans' draft, 2006 clearly ain't it.  That was BY FAR, their best draft ever.  

[Bench]

This offense may be able to accomplish a historic level of ineptitude.

[Bench]

Alfred Blue sounds like a parody jazz album.

[Bench]

TJ Yates just seems so at home.

[austro]

TJ Yates just seems so at home.

Yeah, I'm sure that everybody is going to be excited by the interceptions. But they need to give some consideration to who was throwing the ball.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Wow. Different week, different result. Preseason.

[HudsonHawk]

A MUCH better game last night. 

The Highlights:

• Clowney is the real deal.  He *destroyed* the Falcons' first team line.
  
• They continued to run the ball really well.  In the NFL, if you can run the ball, you can control the clock, which means you can overcome a porous defense and win some games. 
• Fitzpatrick can make plays sometimes.  The 2-minute drill at the end of the half was excellent.
• Keyshawn Martin can be a legit receiver in this league.
• Bill O'Brien apparently has seen a football game before and can manage the clock and most importantly, make adjustments when his team is struggling.
• The special teams looked great.  Firing Joe Marciano was the best move the Texans ever made.  The special teams may not be a historic clusterfuck for the umpteempth year running.
• Bob McNair is a snappy dresser, but that moustache has got to go.

The Lowlights:

• Way too many penalties, especially the mental ones.

That's really about it.  Aside from the penalties and the missed kicks by the camp kicker who'll be gone in a few weeks, not much to complain about last night.  Other than the ridiculous officiating.  If they call that game straight up, it's more like 52-0. 

[austro]

It sure is relaxing watching Schaub suck for somebody else. Apparently the Raiders scored on their first drive against the Packers, but since then they're something like 12 plays for no yards, with Schaub throwing his signature 7-yard passes to covered receivers. I won't miss that.

[Navin R Johnson]

This sounds familiar, from a Bay Area report on Schaub last night...

http://www.nbcbayarea.com/news/local/Schaub-Again-Shaky-in-Raiders-Loss-272389251.html

In his third preseason game for the Raiders Friday night, Matt Schaub looked much like he did in Games 1 and 2.

And that’s not good.
 
Schaub completed 13-of-27 passes for 110 yards – just over 4 yards per attempt -

Schaub still looked fragile in the pocket, didn’t challenge the Packers defense downfield and showed a less-than-rifle arm.

[Clark in Denver]

I am surprised at the number of people wearing old Oilers stuff outside the stadium here in Denver tonight.

[austro]

I am surprised at the number of people wearing old Oilers stuff outside the stadium here in Denver tonight.

Look for Floyd Little and Bobby Anderson jerseys. They'll probably be accompanied by walkers.

[austro]

Seriously: 10 seconds left in the half, opposition on your 26, and you can't keep them out of the endzone?

[Bench]

Seriously: 10 seconds left in the half, opposition on your 26, and you can't keep them out of the endzone?

That was a fuck you sequence from a clearly superior team.

[Bench]

Savage looks better against third stringers than Keenum did last pre-season.

[chandler44]

Espn is reporting the Texans acquired qb Mallett from the Patriots for a sixth rd draft pick.

[jbm]

Seems like a pretty cheap price, but maybe the Pats were about to waive him.

Apparently Keenum is waived.

[hostros7]

Seems like a pretty cheap price, but maybe the Pats were about to waive him.

Apparently Keenum is waived.

Basically like getting him for free with Smith drafting.

[Limey]

Basically like getting him for free with Smith drafting.

Yep.  They also cut their 2nd round pick.   Think about that for a moment...

[hostros7]

Yep.  They also cut their 2nd round pick.   Think about that for a moment...

I believe they even traded up to get him.

[HudsonHawk]

Yep.  They also cut their 2nd round pick.   Think about that for a moment...

Who cut their 2nd round pick?  The Patriots' 2nd round pick was Garoppolo, who is the reason Mallet was available.

[chuck]

Who cut their 2nd round pick?  The Patriots' 2nd round pick was Garoppolo, who is the reason Mallet was available.

They're talking about Brandon Harris I think.

[Lefty]

Yep.  They also cut *a 2nd round pick from 2011*

fify

Yes, they traded up for him, and yes, in hindsight that was a terrible pick, but look back and see how Harris was rated going into that draft.

[Bench]

And in former and tangential Texans news, the Raiders are reported to have tabbed Derek Carr as their week 1 starter over Schaub.

[Navin R Johnson]

And in former and tangential Texans news, the Raiders are reported to have tabbed Derek Carr as their week 1 starter over Schaub.

NOOOOOOO!!!!   There went 1 of the 5 wins I had penciled in for the Texans.

[Uncle Charlie]

The next team dinner check will be paid by JJ Watt.

[Limey]

Apparently Keenum is waived.

Picked up by the Rams.

[Limey]

The next team dinner check will be paid by JJ Watt.

Over $50mm guaranteed, and it breaks Mario Williams' record contract with the Bills.

[Limey]

Defense looked great today; Reed and Cushing seem to be ready, willing and able to take the freedom granted them by the presence of Watt and Clowney.  Later, Watt went nuts because the Racially Insensitives had to respect the rest of the D.  

Offense looks less than stellar, but FP isn't a coward, so that's an improvement.  

Not going to win 'em all, but they'll win a few.  I.e more than 2.

[austro]

Any word on Clowney yet?

[Limey]

BTW, worst roughing the passer call...ever!

Ball was still in RG3's hand when the helmet hit his chest.  Turnover in next play negated the shitty call, without which te call may well have decided the game. 

Referees looking in pre-season form still. 

[HudsonHawk]

Any word on Clowney yet?

Torn meniscus in his knee. Gone for the season.

[Limey]

Torn meniscus in his knee. Gone for the season.

Well fuck

[BizidyDizidy]

I don't think that's official until they get the MRI results tomorrow.

[NeilT]

Well fuck

It must be a badly torn meniscus.

[Limey]

It must be a badly torn meniscus.

At least he didn't rip a labia. 

[cougar]

Torn meniscus in his knee. Gone for the season.

Or 4-6 weeks, which ever comes first.

[Bench]

BTW, worst roughing the passer call...ever!

Ball was still in RG3's hand when the helmet hit his chest.  Turnover in next play negated the shitty call, without which te call may well have decided the game.  

Referees looking in pre-season form still.  

Swearinger is going to get a bunch of those calls based solely on his reputation as an ass.

[Limey]

Swearinger is going to get a bunch of those calls based solely on his reputation as an ass.

I think the sequence of events was:

1) Everyone (except RG3) saw DJ coming;
2) Referee throws flag
3) Swearengen hits RG3
4) RG3 releases the ball.

[HudsonHawk]

I think the sequence of events was:

1) Everyone (except RG3) saw DJ coming;
2) Referee throws flag
3) Swearengen hits RG3
4) RG3 releases the ball.

The penalty was for hitting him high, not hitting him late. 

[BizidyDizidy]

The penalty was for hitting him high, not hitting him late. 

Although the video could be used as a teaching instructional on how to properly hit a QB.

[jbm]

Yeah, it's kind of like the rule at home plate in that I have trouble knowing what is legal and what is not, as he seemed to lead with his shoulder pad.

Overall, I was pleasantly surprised by the offense.  They lack the big play potential, but they still made the most of what they had.  Having Foster back seemed like a huge difference. 

[HudsonHawk]

Although the video could be used as a teaching instructional on how to properly hit a QB.

Perhaps, but putting your helmet into a QB's chest is against the rules in the NFL. 

[Limey]

Although the video could be used as a teaching instructional on how to properly hit a QB.

Exactly.  Arms wrapped, no helmet-to-helmet contact.

[HudsonHawk]

Exactly.  Arms wrapped, no helmet-to-helmet contact.

Helmet to helmet only applies to players other than the QB.  You cannot put your helmet or facemask into the chest of a QB, regardless of whether you wrap your arms around him or not.  That may be a pussy rule, but that's the NFL now. 

[Limey]

Helmet to helmet only applies to players other than the QB.  You cannot put your helmet or facemask into the chest of a QB, regardless of whether you wrap your arms around him or not.  That may be a pussy rule, but that's the NFL now. 

Well fuck.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Having Foster back makes all the difference with the offense.

[BizidyDizidy]

Helmet to helmet only applies to players other than the QB.  You cannot put your helmet or facemask into the chest of a QB, regardless of whether you wrap your arms around him or not.  That may be a pussy rule, but that's the NFL now. 

https://twitter.com/MikePereira/status/508689502198448128

[HudsonHawk]

https://twitter.com/MikePereira/status/508689502198448128

I know Twitter has replaced Wikipedia as your generation's source for complete and accurate information, but from the NLF's actual rulebook (which is longer than 144 characters, so you may want to read this in multiple sessions):

Rule 12, Section 2, Article 9:

A defensive player must not use his helmet against a passer who is in a defenseless posture—for example, (1) forcibly hitting the passer’s head or neck area with the helmet or facemask, even if the initial contact of the defender’s helmet or facemask is lower than the passer’s neck, and regardless of whether the defensive player also uses his arms to tackle the passer by encircling or grasping him; or (2) lowering the head and making forcible contact with the top/crown or forehead/―hairline‖ parts of the helmet against any part of the passer’s body.

So while you may think it's a pussy rule, both the NFL and the man charged with adjudicating the rules on behalf of the NFL during said game agree that such a play is against the rules and should be penalized.

[MusicMan]

I know Twitter has replaced Wikipedia as your generation's source for complete and accurate information,

Not to rain on your pissing parade, but Mike Pereira is a former head NFL referee.  Biz is not off target in referencing him as an expert opinion.

[HudsonHawk]

Not to rain on your pissing parade, but Mike Pereira is a former head NFL referee.  Biz is not off target in referencing him as an expert opinion.

Not to piss on your rain, but the rules is the rules, despite Mike Pereira's former occupation.  It is a judgment call, and the rulebook is also clear...if it's close, call the penalty.  Again, I'm not saying it's a good rule or that I agree with it, only that it is what it is and the rule was applied as it's written. 

[BizidyDizidy]

I know Twitter has replaced Wikipedia as your generation's source for complete and accurate information, but from the NLF's actual rulebook (which is longer than 144 characters, so you may want to read this in multiple sessions):

Rule 12, Section 2, Article 9:

A defensive player must not use his helmet against a passer who is in a defenseless posture—for example, (1) forcibly hitting the passer’s head or neck area with the helmet or facemask, even if the initial contact of the defender’s helmet or facemask is lower than the passer’s neck, and regardless of whether the defensive player also uses his arms to tackle the passer by encircling or grasping him; or (2) lowering the head and making forcible contact with the top/crown or forehead/―hairline‖ parts of the helmet against any part of the passer’s body.

So while you may think it's a pussy rule, both the NFL and the man charged with adjudicating the rules on behalf of the NFL during said game agree that such a play is against the rules and should be penalized.

Neither of those two things relate to what happened in the game, which was Swearinger's facemask contacting RGIII's torso and never coming into the head or neck area.

[HudsonHawk]

Neither of those two things relate to what happened in the game, which was Swearinger's facemask contacting RGIII's torso and never coming into the head or neck area.

He put his helmet right into Griffin's chest. The crown of his helmet went right under the chin. You can't put your helmet directly into ANY part of the QB's body. Period. That's against the rules. Explicitly.

[BizidyDizidy]

He did not hit Griffin in the head or neck area or lower his helmet.

http://kcmsports.com/inside/2014/09/07/d-j-swearinger-flagged-appears-clean-hit-rgiii/

What a surprise that HH is smarter than everyone, including the NFL head of officials.

[HudsonHawk]

He did not hit Griffin in the head or neck area or lower his helmet.

He put his helmet right into Griffin's chest.  What part of "making forcible contact with the top/crown or forehead/hairline parts of the helmet against ANY PART OF THE PASSER'S BODY" has you all confused?  Secondly, where do you think the neck is?  Around your balls?

What a surprise that HH is smarter than everyone, including the NFL head of officials.

I'm just smarter than you, apparently.  BTW, Pereira is no longer the head of NFL officials.

[Jacksonian]

He did not hit Griffin in the head or neck area or lower his helmet.

http://kcmsports.com/inside/2014/09/07/d-j-swearinger-flagged-appears-clean-hit-rgiii/

What a surprise that HH is smarter than everyone, including the NFL head of officials.

HH is right.  Read it carefully.  The rule is: "A defensive player must not use his helmet against a passer who is in a defenseless posture."  The rest are just examples.

[Randy Watson]

Perhaps, but putting your helmet into a QB's chest is against the rules in the NFL. 

He put his face mask on the numbers and wrapped him up.  Terrible call because that was a textbook tackle.

[HudsonHawk]

He put his face mask on the numbers and wrapped him up.  Terrible call because that was a textbook tackle.

Textbook though it may be, it's illegal to hit a QB like that in the NFL.

[chuck]

I don't understand how a quarterback can be tackled in a similar instance because a liberal reading of the rule means that virtually any contact a defender's helmet makes with the quarterback's torso results in a penalty.

[homer]

I don't understand how a quarterback can be tackled in a similar instance because a liberal reading of the rule means that virtually any contact a defender's helmet makes with the quarterback's torso results in a penalty.

HH can't understand it for everyone.

[HudsonHawk]

I don't understand how a quarterback can be tackled in a similar instance because a liberal reading of the rule means that virtually any contact a defender's helmet makes with the quarterback's torso results in a penalty.

When you lead with the helmet...yep.

[HudsonHawk]

HH can't understand it for everyone.

At least I can understand it for myself. So I'm ahead of you.

[Lefty]

Just admit you are wrong.  Nobody will think less of you.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

He put his face mask on the numbers and wrapped him up.  Terrible call because that was a textbook tackle.

I guess the textbook has changed. We were taught to use our shoulder pads not our heads.

[HudsonHawk]

Just admit you are wrong.  Nobody will think less of you.

I keep telling people that, but they won't listen.

[HudsonHawk]

I guess the textbook has changed. We were taught to use our shoulder pads not our heads.

And the rulebook has changed in the last few years, which is what people refuse to accept.

[Limey]

And the rulebook has changed in the last few years, which is what people refuse to accept.

I blame the Lingerie League.

[Jacksonian]

I blame the Lingerie League.

I would have thought they'd want face to chest contact.

[Bench]

JJ with is first offensive touchdown.

Has he even lined up on offense before?

[chuck]

Has he even lined up on offense before?

Remembering who the previous coach was should be enough to answer that.

[JaneDoe]

Remembering who the previous coach was should be enough to answer that.

Understatement of the millennium.

[austro]

JJ with is first offensive touchdown.

It is so nice to have Superman on our team for a change.

[Bench]

Remembering who the previous coach was should be enough to answer that.

Excellent point.

[Limey]

Excellent point.

JJ was lobbying in the media to help out on offense, saying that he could help give Schaub more time to throw*.  O'Brien may be simply a more flexible / imaginative coach, or maybe Watt got it written into his contract that he gets to play on offense everyone once in a while.  Against the Raiders was a great place to try it, because they stomp more dick than Ndamukong Suh.


* ...a dump pass on 3rd down to the ankles of a receiver who is short of the 1st down marker.  Oh the memories.


Re: the Raiders, they really should test the air over there in Oakland.  I have never seen - and I had season tickets to the 2-13 Texans - more stupidity on the field and on the sidelines in my lifetime of watching football.  Maybe if the fans dressed up all preppy, instead of like the love children of like the love children of Gwar and Lord Humongous, the team would make smarter decisions.

[HudsonHawk]

JJ was lobbying in the media to help out on offense, saying that he could help give Schaub more time to throw*.  O'Brien may be simply a more flexible / imaginative coach, or maybe Watt got it written into his contract that he gets to play on offense everyone once in a while.  Against the Raiders was a great place to try it, because they stomp more dick than Ndamukong Suh.

Probably the former.  Pretty much every team has that play (defensive lineman lined up at TE on the goal line) in the playbook.  It was a very well designed play, called at the right time.  They had Foster one on one with a linebacker, and a linebacker supposed to be covering the TE (Watt).  If the LB stays with Watt, it's a pretty good mismatch for Foster.  If the LB assigned to the Watt bites and lets him go to help out on Foster, which he did, Watt is wide open.  

[MusicMan]

It was a very well designed play, called at the right time.   

I'm a Texans fan and what do these words mean?

[Nate in IA]

Re: the Raiders, they really should test the air over there in Oakland.  I have never seen - and I had season tickets to the 2-13 Texans - more stupidity on the field and on the sidelines in my lifetime of watching football.  Maybe if the fans dressed up all preppy, instead of like the love children of like the love children of Gwar and Lord Humongous, the team would make smarter decisions.

I think the Jets gave them a run for the money this weekend.   Unbelievable stupidity on the field.   

[Uncle Charlie]

I think the Jets gave them a run for the money this weekend.   Unbelievable stupidity on the field.   

The interception at the end of the half was horrendous - it, and the subsequent GB drive, was a true turning point.

[austro]

J.J. Watt is not human. That is all.

[Limey]

J.J. Watt is not human. That is all.

On Sunday, JJ and the Texans' defense go up against one of the best o-lines in the league...in Dallas.

This may be epic.

[HudsonHawk]

On Sunday, JJ and the Texans' defense go up against one of the best o-lines in the league...in Dallas.

This may be epic.

The Texans' run defense got beat by an average Washington O-line.  They got shredded by a decent O-line in NY.  They are going to get massacred in Dallas.  I'm afraid it will be epic alright, but not in a good way. 

[Limey]

The Texans' run defense got beat by an average Washington O-line.  They got shredded by a decent O-line in NY.  They are going to get massacred in Dallas.  I'm afraid it will be epic alright, but not in a good way. 

Is Clowney due to be back?

[jbm]

No, Clowney is not set to be back.

While I am somewhat worried about their run defense, the addition of Pickett helped last week.  I think the NYG, continuous 7 yard gash game will be somewhat of an anomaly. 

[HudsonHawk]

No, Clowney is not set to be back.

The talking heads this morning said he probably won't be back until at least the Monday night game in Pittsburgh on the 20th, possibly (probably?) not until the 26th at TN.  

While I am somewhat worried about their run defense, the addition of Pickett helped last week.  I think the NYG, continuous 7 yard gash game will be somewhat of an anomaly.  

I hope you're right, but I don't see it.  Pickett helped some, but they are just so, so bad at linebacker.  Cushing is OK against the run, but he's not exactly a guy who blows up the double team on the NT.  The other guys...Reed, Tuggle, Mohamed, Mercilus, etc are just plain awful.  And if they end up in the dime package with Swearinger essentially playing MLB like they did in NY...heaven help them.  I like Swearinger.  He can do a lot of things, but play MLB in the NFL ain't one of them.  We'll see, but they've been simply terrible against the run all year, and I don't see them making any drastic improvement against perhaps the best rushing team in the league.  

I think the only chance the Texans have on Sunday is if Foster gets 35+ carries and they have the ball for 40 minutes.  And win the game 17-14.  

[MusicMan]

I think the only chance the Texans have on Sunday is if Foster gets 35+ carries and they have the ball for 40 minutes.  And win the game 17-14. 

Or if Romo goes full Romo and throws 3-4 picks.

[austro]

Or if Romo goes full Romo and throws 3-4 picks.

That will only happen if the Texans stop the run. Like HH, I'm skeptical of that.

[Limey]

That will only happen if the Texans stop the run. Like HH, I'm skeptical of that.

Dallas have been relying on the run, which makes total sense: run it until they show they can stop you.

[HudsonHawk]

That will only happen if the Texans stop the run. Like HH, I'm skeptical of that.

Or if the Texans somehow manage to get a lead...turnovers, special teams, Foster running for 140 yards in the first half, etc.  Short of that, however, the Texans defense will be completely gassed before halftime. 

[Limey]

Meanwhile, Watt has been fined for roughing Manuel last weekend.  While my brain has written half a dozen Ray Rice jokes already, it makes me wonder if it's not trying to take the edge off him this week. 

It doesn't matter because it wouldn't work even if true.  Watt doesn't know what to spend his money on, but I suspect he'd think 20 grand here or there for doing a good job would be a worthy expense. 

[Uncle Charlie]

Really wanted to go to the game up here in Dallas but just can't justify the expense.  Oh wel - I'll watch it in TV.  The radio voices have been in rare form this week..."the Texans 3 wins are hollow"..."Cowboys are finally beginning to get recognized nationally for how good this team has looked"

While I agree that the texans wins have been against some bad teams, the cowboys haven't been beating Denver or Seattle.  What I wouldn't do for a Texans W this week.

[HudsonHawk]

Really wanted to go to the game up here in Dallas but just can't justify the expense.  Oh wel - I'll watch it in TV.  The radio voices have been in rare form this week..."the Texans 3 wins are hollow"..."Cowboys are finally beginning to get recognized nationally for how good this team has looked"

While I agree that the texans wins have been against some bad teams, the cowboys haven't been beating Denver or Seattle.  What I wouldn't do for a Texans W this week.

The Cowboys have looked great exactly once.  And you talk about the Texans' soft schedule...I don't know that you get more cupcakes games than the Cowboys get this year.

[Uncle Charlie]

The Cowboys have looked great exactly once.  And you talk about the Texans' soft schedule...I don't know that you get more cupcakes games than the Cowboys get this year.

That is what cracked me up.  The one game where they didn't play a cupcake was over in the first 20 minutes

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

I've got the Texans defense in our FFL. So far they've been about Watt I expected. I'm worried about Murray running wild this week. I'm also worried about play-action passes to wide open receivers.

[HudsonHawk]

I've got the Texans defense in our FFL. So far they've been about Watt I expected. I'm worried about Murray running wild this week. I'm also worried about play-action passes to wide open receivers.

I'm worried that Ryan Fitzpatrick is playing quarterback.

[chuck]

There are many Texans fans in this dump than anything else.

[austro]

I'm worried that Ryan Fitzpatrick is playing quarterback.

I thought O'Brien had a reputation as a quarterback whisperer. If so, it sure isn't evident yet.

[chuck]

He'll have to speak louder than a whisper.

[HudsonHawk]

I thought O'Brien had a reputation as a quarterback whisperer. If so, it sure isn't evident yet.

But it's Ryan Fitzpatrick. You cannot win with him. When you name him your starter, you are, by default, throwing in the towel for the season, and playing for something else.  The Texans wrote off this season last April.

[Limey]

Great 4th conversion by the Texans, but what the fuck was up with that clock management?

[HudsonHawk]

Great 4th conversion by the Texans, but what the fuck was up with that clock management?

That's Kubiaksque clock management. They wasted almost 3 minutes to gain 4 yards. Now a Cowboy first down ends the game. Pitiful.

[Limey]

At least the Cowboys are still the Cowboys. 

[HudsonHawk]

Now the Cowboys stepping on their dicks. Delay of game penalty coming out of a timeout and intentional grounding on 3rd down gives the Texans the ball in Cowboy territory with 2 minutes and one time out.

[austro]

I have no idea why  the Cowboys didn't run the ball on that 3rd-and-6.

I wonder if the Cowboy fans still think their team is great?

[Limey]

I wonder if the Cowboy fans still think their team is great?

If they lose, good luck finding one to ask. 

[austro]

Why aren't they using somebody as a spy on Murray?

[BudGirl]

If they lose, good luck finding one to ask. 

If they lose I'll tell you.

[BudGirl]

And I've never said this team is great.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Bailey can't quite hammer the nail in the coffin. Overtime, Texans win the toss, choose to receive.

[Limey]

If they lose I'll tell you.

I reality, this result should not matter one way or the other. 

[austro]

Why the fuck would you take a 3rd-and-2 and put it all on Fitzpatrick's shoulders? That's insane.

[austro]

And I've never said this team is great.

Doesn't count: you're rational.

[Limey]

Why the fuck would you take a 3rd-and-2 and put it all on Fitzpatrick's shoulders? That's insane.

Bad idea that looks to have cost us the game. 

Amazing catch by Bryant. 

[austro]

Amazing catch by Bryant. 

Yup, heck of an effort.

[chuck]

Why the fuck would you take a 3rd-and-2 and put it all on Fitzpatrick's shoulders? That's insane.

Foster's gashing the defense and they decide to let Fitz throw it. Foster wasn't even on the field on second down.

[HudsonHawk]

Bad idea that looks to have cost us the game. 

Amazing catch by Bryant. 

Poor play calling cost this game. It's all on O'Brien.

[BudGirl]

And now everyone will know that Bailey is a favorite of me and my friends.  Has been ever since a Monday night game against Washington.

[austro]

Foster's gashing the defense and they decide to let Fitz throw it. Foster wasn't even on the field on second down.

Yeah, unless Foster's leg had fallen off, that's inexcusable. At least put him in the backfield and let Dallas wonder whether he's going to carry it.

[HudsonHawk]

Foster's gashing the defense and they decide to let Fitz throw it. Foster wasn't even on the field on second down.

Inexcusable "coaching".

[HudsonHawk]

And now everyone will know that Bailey is a favorite of me and my friends.  Has been ever since a Monday night game against Washington.

Because he made a routine field goal?

[austro]

Inexcusable "coaching".

Getting outcoached by Jason Garrett is not going to look good on your resume.

[BudGirl]

Because he made a routine field goal?

Routine field goals can win games.

[HudsonHawk]

On a side note, Tampa Bay just got royally fucked by the referees.

[HudsonHawk]

Routine field goals can win games.

They usually do. They just don't exactly elevate guys to favorite player status.

[BudGirl]

They usually do. They just don't exactly elevate guys to favorite player status.

We love Bailey.  He rarely lets us down.

[HudsonHawk]

Getting outcoached by Jason Garrett is not going to look good on your resume.

Garret didn't exactly out coach anyone. He stepped on his dick plenty. But he has far more talent than O'Brien does.

[BudGirl]

Garret didn't exactly out coach anyone.

He rarely to never does.

[HudsonHawk]

He rarely to never does.

I find it unfathomable that he ever has.

[chuck]

I find it incredible that as bad as the team's OG are the Texans go and spend a 33 overall on a guard who can't even see the field. They have basically zero to show for this year's draft, the TE who plays every now and then and gets a false start penalty every game, the FB who plays less and less each week, Andre Hal, Blue. Zero production from the first four picks and almost no production at all from all of the picks. It's not exactly like this team has Seattle-level talent. They blow, in fact, precious little talent and no depth at all. And no draft pick can see the field and make any sort of positive impact.

I don't know who the fuck is in charge of the drafting but they need to find someone else for that job.

[HudsonHawk]

Well you can't predict that your first pick will suffer a knee injury on a non-contact play due to your crappy field.  And the Texans got the game they wanted today.  The defense, as bad as they are at linebacker, kept them in the game...a great game from Foster.  The problem is not that they're getting nothing from their draft picks, it's that they've hitched their wagon to the Ryan Fitzpatrick wagon.  You just can't overcome that. 

[austro]

I don't know who the fuck is in charge of the drafting but they need to find someone else for that job.

I hear that they're looking to bring Purpura in.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Too bad that Keenum never got to play with a healthy Foster. It might have ended different.

[jbm]

I agree that Fitzpatrick is the biggest problem, but a guard picked at the top of the second round should easily unseat Ben Jones.

I hope O'Brien gets better than average talent at some point.

[HudsonHawk]

I agree that Fitzpatrick is the biggest problem, but a guard picked at the top of the second round should easily unseat Ben Jones.

I hope O'Brien gets better than average talent at some point.

Jones has played really well. I don't know why you think he's a problem. They ran the ball at will to that left side.  Offensive line play in general is about number 12 on the list of Texans problems.

[chuck]

Jones has played really well. I don't know why you think he's a problem. They ran the ball at will to that left side.  Offensive line play in general is about number 12 on the list of Texans problems.

Fitzpatrick has no time to throw the ball.

[HudsonHawk]

Fitzpatrick has no time to throw the ball.

He has plenty. He's just really really really really bad at it.

[jbm]

I haven't rewatched this game, but based on the previous four, Jones is a real weak link

[HudsonHawk]

I haven't rewatched this game, but based on the previous four, Jones is a real weak link

Jones has played REALLY well all year. I can't imagine what your seeing, not to mention when they are so bad at QB, so bad at TE, so bad at LB, so bad at NT, and so bad at CB that you'd think the left guard is the problem.  It's like saying "I know our starting pitching is terrible, and so is the bullpen, and so is our leadoff hitter, and number 3,4 and 5 hitters, but the problem has been our left fielder."  Jones isn't the weakest link on the O-line.  He's not even the weakest link at the guard position.

[chuck]

He has plenty.

If you really think this then I don't know what to say.

[HudsonHawk]

If you really think this then I don't know what to say.

Kind of like me when you tell me that Ben Jones is the problem with this team.

[chuck]

Kind of like me when you tell me that Ben Jones is the problem with this team.

I never singled out Ben Jones. The line play has been poor and the team spent a 33 overall pick on a guard that can't see the fucking field. It doesn't take a genius to see how this adds up to a bad team and a losing organization.

[HudsonHawk]

I never singled out Ben Jones. The line play has been poor and the team spent a 33 overall pick on a guard that can't see the fucking field. It doesn't take a genius to see how this adds up to a bad team and a losing organization.

I meant the royal "you".  And I don't agree that the O-line play has been that bad, certainly not as bad as four or five other things.  What adds up to a bad team is not addressing your biggest weaknesses. 

[austro]

The numbers would seem to indicate that the left side of the line is not a problem, but that the right side of the line is horrible. I believe that at one point today I saw something like a 65/65/2 split for Foster yardage on runs to the left/center/right.

I still can't believe that they didn't try to run Foster to the left side on the 3rd-and-2 in the overtime. Seriously, Fitzpatrick with an empty backfield is a better option? Somebody is on serious drugs.

[HudsonHawk]

I still can't believe that they didn't try to run Foster to the left side on the 3rd-and-2 in the overtime. Seriously, Fitzpatrick with an empty backfield is a better option? Somebody is on serious drugs.

Or why when you *do* run Blue on 2nd down, you don't run him to the left...behind Jones and Brown...where you'd been crushing them all day.  No way around it...the play calling in OT was inexcusable. 

[jbm]

Just watching the first half again. I stick by what I said. Hell, the only lineman they pulled was Jones for the last two series, so I don't think I'm alone in my assessment. Sua Filo looked fine. Unless he gets hurt, he'll start to eat away at many of Jone's snaps.  BTW, Jones did look better in the first half.

Almost all of the big runs sprung on the left side were taking advantage of the defensive alignment and the blocks were made by Brown and the tight end.

[HudsonHawk]

Just watching the first half again. I stick by what I said. Hell, the only lineman they pulled was Jones for the last two series, so I don't think I'm alone in my assessment. Sua Filo looked fine. Unless he gets hurt, he'll start to eat away at many of Jone's snaps.  BTW, Jones did look better in the first half.

Almost all of the big runs sprung on the left side were taking advantage of the defensive alignment and the blocks were made by Brown and the tight end.

I now have zero confidence in your ability to review game film.

[chuck]

What adds up to a bad team is not addressing your biggest weaknesses. 

I'm OK with their doing what they did at QB if they didn't like Bortles or Bridgewater. If Clowney comes back and stays healthy (stop laughing) then that will go a long way towards sweetening this year's draft. (Watt's brilliance goes a long way towards forgetting that the team drafted Brooks Reed, Brandon Harris, Roc Carmichael, Shiloh Keo and TJ Yates, and also that they did all that with Richard Sherman sitting there on the board...)

But if you go out of your way to address a problem area in the draft how about we make sure that you draft a guy who will fucking play? Harris above is a great example of this team's fucked up drafting. Su'a-Filo may well be another.

[HudsonHawk]

I'm OK with their doing what they did at QB if they didn't like Bortles or Bridgewater. If Clowney comes back and stays healthy (stop laughing) then that will go a long way towards sweetening this year's draft. (Watt's brilliance goes a long way towards forgetting that the team drafted Brooks Reed, Brandon Harris, Roc Carmichael, Shiloh Keo and TJ Yates, and also that they did all that with Richard Sherman sitting there on the board...)

But if you go out of your way to address a problem area in the draft how about we make sure that you draft a guy who will fucking play? Harris above is a great example of this team's fucked up drafting. Su'a-Filo may well be another.

I don't disagree with that. Personally, my biggest Texans draft disappointment ever is Whitney Mercilus. A first rounder who can't even start on a team that's really weak at his position.

[Limey]

I hear that they're looking to bring Purpura in.

When I heard the booth guys saying that the league needs to find a way to make this "natural rivalry" play every year, my whole being went "noooooooooooooooooo!"

[jbm]

Personally, my biggest Texans draft disappointment ever is Whitney Mercilus. A first rounder who can't even start on a team that's really weak at his position.

I'll agree there.  In my lame review of the game film, he and Reed have done absolutely zilch. Crannel should be commended for creating a defense this decent with a front seven, sans Watt, that is so weak.

[HudsonHawk]

I'll agree there.  In my lame review of the game film, he and Reed have done absolutely zilch. Crannel should be commended for creating a defense this decent with a front seven, sans Watt, that is so weak.

Tuggle and Mohamed are also worthless.  As is Tarpinian. And Powe. Despite that, the defense for the most part did their job today. They still struggle to get off the field on 3rd down, and Jonathan Joseph is still only 5'9". But they kept the team in the game and gave them a chance to win.  They just couldn't overcome their QB.

[chuck]

They just couldn't overcome their QB.

Their quarterback or their head coach?

Amobi Okoye is my vote for biggest draft bust.

[HudsonHawk]

Their quarterback or their head coach?

Neither were stellar today, but I'll have to say, unlike his predecessor, OB knows he's allowed to make adjustments at halftime. He doesn't seem to get outcoached to a bloody pulp in the second half. The play calling in OT was bad. But Fitz is just bad too.

[jbm]

Other than the call on 3rd and two, what did O'Brien do wrong?  The Texans were well prepared and seemed to make productive adjustments, but we're beat by a team that made the critical plays. Hard to pin it on OB, IMO.

[HudsonHawk]

Other than the call on 3rd and two, what did O'Brien do wrong?  The Texans were well prepared and seemed to make productive adjustments, but we're beat by a team that made the critical plays. Hard to pin it on OB, IMO.

The call on 2nd and 4. They only ran four plays and two of them were terrible calls. Is a 50% bad call rate not bad enough?

And did you miss the first half?  The offense was atrocious.

[Lefty]

They still struggle to get off the field on 3rd down

They were terrible on Sunday, but I don't know about "still".  Going into the game they held opponents to a 28% 3rd down conversion rate, the best in the NFL

[Limey]

The defense is going to need to get "it" done tonight against the Colts*, to give the anaemic offense a chance to eke out a win.


* Who are good but who's stats on both sides of the ball have been inflated by blowout wins over the woeful Titans and Jags.

[Bench]

The defense is going to need to get "it" done tonight against the Colts*, to give the anaemic offense a chance to eke out a win.


* Who are good but who's stats on both sides of the ball have been inflated by blowout wins over the woeful Titans and Jags.

Half of the Colts' offensive line is on the shelf so JJ should be able to wreck shit up even more than usual. 

[Limey]

Half of the Colts' offensive line is on the shelf so JJ should be able to wreck shit up even more than usual. 

*Like*

[hostros7]

Andrew Luck will probably run for 100+ and 2 TDs as the pocket collapses around him. 

[T. J.]

Will the $50 million roof be open on an 80-degree clear night?

[Limey]

Andrew Luck will probably run for 100+ and 2 TDs as the pocket collapses around him. 

*Dislike*

[hostros7]

*Dislike*

As will I, just saying.  Hope the LB corp comes ready to play tonight. 

[hostros7]

Will the $50 million roof be open on an 80-degree clear night?

Is Bud Selig the commissioner?

[Bench]

Will the $50 million roof be open on an 80-degree clear night?

No fucking way.

[Bench]

As will I, just saying.  Hope the LB corp comes ready to play tonight. 

You can count on Brooks Reed flying in to the play just after a tackle is made. 

[chuck]

You can count on Brooks Reed flying in to the play just after a tackle is made. 

So he'll be there two steps ahead of Cushing.

[HudsonHawk]

Will the $50 million roof be open on an 80-degree clear night?

80 degrees?  In what alternate universe are you living?  It's like 97 out here.

[austro]

Is it too early to think wistfully of the Kubiak days?

They can cut Jackson tomorrow and replace him with a one-legged homeless guy off the street and not miss a beat.

And if I were a receiver, I'd tell Fitzpatrick that the next time he throws a ball behind me I'm coming back to the huddle and kick him in the junk.

[chuck]

These fuckwits spent a first round draft pick on a guy who tries to get out of the way of an offensive player who's trying to score. AND, he's their best corner. It's incredible what a disgrace this organization is.

[Ty in Tampa]

Why is Bob Weir playing QB for the Texans?

[austro]

Why is Bob Weir playing QB for the Texans?

Bob Weir is *much* more talented than that guy.

[austro]

Who was bitching about having Fleener as their TE in FFL this week?

[NeilT]

Why is Bob Weir playing QB for the Texans?

'Cause Jerry Garcia is dead?

[austro]

Boy, the "tackling" here is really something.

[chuck]

Boy, the "tackling" here is really something.

The Texans got gashed by a guy who wasn't good enough to play for the Jaguars and are now getting gashed by a guy that the Browns didn't want.

[austro]

Words cannot describe how awful this secondary is.

[chuck]

Outstanding interior line play, Hudson; you're right, that's a real cornerstone of this team.

[austro]

Well, I have to give these guys credit for not quitting when things looked really bleak.

[HudsonHawk]

Random thoughts...

For the second week in a row, they choked.  The win was there for the taking, they just had to not gag on their own cocks.  But they did. 

Any other starting QB in the league, save perhaps Geno Smith, and the Texans are 5-1 and on their way to winning their division.  As it is, they're going to win maybe three more games. 

OB's time wasting at the end of the game was positively Kubiakesque. 

I counted at least three times a Texans linebacker had Luck wrapped up in the backfield, but failed to tackle him.  I know Luck is a big strong guy, but you're an NFL linebacker for God's sake.  And I'm looking at you Whitney Mercilus. 

I don't know why the Texans even keep a TE on their roster. 

At some point, the offense is going to have to find a way to *not* put them in a 3-touchdown hole before they realize it's gameday. 

This loss effectively cost the Texans four games in the standings. 

It was hot as fuck in the parking lot.

[Uncle Charlie]

Random thoughts...
I

Just to add to those....

The O-line was otrocious in pass blocking - the left side in particular - especially Ben Jones.

I don't think he would have gotten there, but Hopkins effort to recover that last fumble looked like he had given up.

This secondary is bad, so they HAVE to execute and communicate - last night they did neither.

Some of the officiating was not good, though the crappiness benefitted both teams.

[HudsonHawk]

Just to add to those....

The O-line was otrocious in pass blocking - the left side in particular - especially Ben Jones.

I don't think he would have gotten there, but Hopkins effort to recover that last fumble looked like he had given up.

This secondary is bad, so they HAVE to execute and communicate - last night they did neither.

Some of the officiating was not good, though the crappiness benefitted both teams.

I agree the O-line was bad.  But Fitz holds the ball WAY too long.  He has got to get rid of it.

That beat up line of the Colts was the best the Texans have faced all year.  They absolutely destroyed the Texans' front seven.  The secondary wasn't as bad as they looked, as Luck had all day to pick them apart.  And when they could get to him, they couldn't tackle. 

The pass interference on 3rd and long in the 4th quarter (I think it was on Joseph) was atrocious.  It effectively gave the Colts the game with that horrible call, as it flipped the field and let them chew up a couple more minutes. 

I don't care where they rank, the Texans are the worst team I've ever seen at getting off the field on 3rd and long.  If it's 3rd and 5 or more, it's pretty much an automatic first down. 

On the last fumble, I was thinking the same thing about Hopkins.  From my seat, I couldn't see Fitz, and from Hopkins's reaction, I assumed it was an a pass that was deflected.  He gave no effort at all. 

[MusicMan]

I don't think he would have gotten there, but Hopkins effort to recover that last fumble looked like he had given up.

I'm glad I wasn't the only one who thought so.  Not a solitary fuck was given.

[Limey]

I'm glad I wasn't the only one who thought so.  Not a solitary fuck was given.

It was somewhat apt, given that the 1st quarter was highlighted by Jackson not bothering to down Hilton, albeit that he was saved by the replay that must have shown an inadvertent touch that I didn't see, after the special teams let the kicker go unmolested while recovering his own kickoff.

The Texans weren't ready to play, and the Colts were.  They took advantage of the Texans' sleepiness, and the fact that the stadium was still only about half full in the 1st quarter.  The home field advantage didn't materialize until deep into the 2nd - a bit like the Texans themselves.

[homer]

Not a solitary fuck was given.

Perhaps he's also on a personally imposed "fuck" quota this month.

[Bench]

Pendergast sums up the season pretty well:

If I'm looking in my crystal ball, I think the thing that is ultimately going to make me sad at the end of the season is that we will have seen an all-time season by J.J. Watt, one of the last great seasons from Arian Foster, one of the only seasons where Andre Johnson and DeAndre Hopkins will be playing together at a high level, and it will be wasted on a roster filled with failed draft choices and quarterbacked by a ten year journeyman who puts a firm ceiling on the offense of bottom third of the league. That sucks.

[chuck]

This is pretty good.

https://vine.co/v/OA1m5UVj7HB

[HudsonHawk]

This is pretty good.

https://vine.co/v/OA1m5UVj7HB

It's all clear now.  The reason Ryan Fitzpatrick is a career backup is because of Ben Jones.  If he'd only known that 10 years ago, he might coulda been somebody. 

[chuck]

It's all clear now.  The reason Ryan Fitzpatrick is a career backup is because of Ben Jones.  If he'd only known that 10 years ago, he might coulda been somebody. 

Well, I'll give him this, Ben Jones lays a hell of a block on Chris Myers. Or it could have been the other way around, I'd have to look at it again and I'm in a good mood right now.

You were right, though, Fitzpatrick holds the ball too long.

[HudsonHawk]

Well, I'll give him this, Ben Jones lays a hell of a block on Chris Myers. Or it could have been the other way around, I'd have to look at it again and I'm in a good mood right now.

You were right, though, Fitzpatrick holds the ball too long.

I'll say this; the weak link in that play was Brown.  On a stunt like that, the lineman have to switch (otherwise they'll take each other out of the play...imagine that), and Brown didn't while Jones did.  Foster is supposed to pick up the blitzing LB, but he couldn't because he was run over by the tackle.  Ironically, the only person in that play not completely beaten to a pulp is Derek Newton. 

[chuck]

In all seriousness Derek Newton is quietly becoming the team's most consistent lineman. In the clip I love watching the team's 2nd pick, 33 overall, get thrown to the ground like a child.

[jbm]

I'll say this; the weak link in that play was Brown.  On a stunt like that, the lineman have to switch (otherwise they'll take each other out of the play...imagine that), and Brown didn't while Jones did.  Foster is supposed to pick up the blitzing LB, but he couldn't because he was run over by the tackle.  Ironically, the only person in that play not completely beaten to a pulp is Derek Newton. 

Huh?  Foster, like Myers, Wade and Brown were touched by no one on that play, and they touched no one. That was a complete group fuckup.

[HudsonHawk]

Huh?  Foster, like Myers, Wade and Brown were touched by no one on that play, and they touched no one. That was a complete group fuckup.

It was a group fuckup because Duane Brown took out his own guys. 

[austro]

Well, that was a spectacular couple of minutes.

[Bench]

That escalated quickly.

[hostros7]

That escalated quickly.

on the dick stomping scale not sure where this one registers.  Is a mallet involved?

[Limey]

That escalated quickly.

At least the Colts needed 15 minutes to put 24 points on the Texans.  The Steelers just did it in under 3 minutes, and with a timeout left. 

[chuck]

Vintage Houston Texans football.

[HudsonHawk]

Vintage Houston Texans football.

Holy fuck, O'Brien is stupider than Kubiak. I didn't think that was possible.

[chuck]

Holy fuck, O'Brien is stupider than Kubiak. I didn't think that was possible.

I'm not ready to go there at all but throwing the ball when he did was so fucking stupid that it's hard to process. If you argue that Kubiak would have pounded the ball and run the clock, well, you're right.

[hostros7]

I'm not ready to go there at all but throwing the ball when he did was so fucking stupid that it's hard to process. If you argue that Kubiak would have pounded the ball and run the clock, well, you're right.

And the Giants game was fucked for the same reason, so apparently he doesn't learn either

[chuck]

Holy fuck, O'Brien is stupider than Kubiak. I didn't think that was possible.

Whose #8 are you wearing? Whoever it is you really should retire it.

[Bench]

Polumalu is John Stockton

[chuck]

So another wasted season. I don't understand all of you who pay money to support this fucking garbage.

[BizidyDizidy]

Chuck, you were banking on playoffs?

[HudsonHawk]

Whose #8 are you wearing? Whoever it is you really should retire it.

I think it's an old Carr jersey. I removed the nameplate years ago.

[HudsonHawk]

Chuck, you were banking on playoffs?

I wasn't banking in it, but just by not stepping on their dicks they could be 6-1 still playing TN and Jacksonville twice. As bad as they are, 10 wins was in reach this year.

[chuck]

Chuck, you were banking on playoffs?

I would think that by now you would know that all of my prejudices are solidified when these slapdicks lose like this. And much like the Astros disaster I can easily find a way to enjoy it.

But there's another part of me that would sort of like to see the Texans play decent football at some point in my lifetime. Just like I wouldn't mind seeing the Astros get good again even if that would result in a marked increase in Noe's posting around here.

But we both know that neither of those things is going to happen.

[MRaup]

I would think that by now you would know that all of my prejudices are solidified when these slapdicks lose like this. And much like the Astros disaster I can easily find a way to enjoy it.

But there's another part of me that would sort of like to see the Texans play decent football at some point in my lifetime. Just like I wouldn't mind seeing the Astros get good again even if that would result in a marked increase in Noe's posting around here.

But we both know that neither of those things is going to happen.

I have nothing to add here aside from the fact that slapdick is one of my favorite words ever.

[Limey]

Apparently, the Texans had never, in their entire history, given up 24 points in a single quarter.  Now they've allowed it twice in consecutive games.

[austro]

Meanwhile, all of the OCs for the remaining opponents are dusting off every available play that will result in Cushing isolated on a RB. God he looked slow. I mean, Bell is good, but Cushing didn't look like he could cover me.

[chuck]

I have nothing to add here aside from the fact that slapdick is one of my favorite words ever.

It's difficult to overuse, that's for sure. And let's face it, if you're talking about the Texans, it's damn near impossible.

[Lefty]

Meanwhile, all of the OCs for the remaining opponents are dusting off every available play that will result in Cushing isolated on a RB. God he looked slow. I mean, Bell is good, but Cushing didn't look like he could cover me.

He's a step slow to everything.  I feel sorry for him.  He was so good, but 2 major knee reconstructions later....

[Bench]

He's a step slow to everything.  I feel sorry for him.  He was so good, but 2 major knee reconstructions later....

He's out this week, probably next week too, in order to rest the knee. 

[HudsonHawk]

He's out this week, probably next week too, in order to rest the knee.  

Another sunshiny anectdote:  Mrs. Hawk went to the knee doctor last week and they got to chatting about Clowney.  The doc told here he'd not examined Clowney, of course, but in his experience as a sports orthopedist, an average football player is back from that injury in three weeks.  The fact that it's now been seven and Clowney is not leads him to speculate either a) Clowney is the biggest out of shape fat ass ever or b) his knee is majorly fucked up far beyond what they're telling anyone.  

[Bench]

Another sunshiny anectdote:  Mrs. Hawk went to the knee doctor last week and they got to chatting about Clowney.  The doc told here he'd not examined Clowney, of course, but in his experience as a sports orthopedist, an average football player is back from that injury in three weeks.  The fact that it's now been seven and Clowney is not leads him to speculate either a) Clowney is the biggest out of shape fat ass ever or b) his knee is majorly fucked up far beyond what they're telling anyone.  

We'll see this weekend.  Clowney expects to play.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Or maybe...
C. A & B
D. None of the above.

[HudsonHawk]

Texans in mid-game dick stepping form early in the first quarter.  Interesting to see Mettenberger...he's the one I wanted the Texans to draft.

[HudsonHawk]

Holy fucking shit Su'a-Filo is awful.  Finally, Ben Jones in there.

[HudsonHawk]

Fitzpatrick has to lead the league in throwing passes into a defensive lineman's helmet.

[HudsonHawk]

Alright...good win.

[austro]

I'm a little confused trying to put these words into the same sentence, but Kareem Jackson actually played fairly well (at least when I was watching).

[HudsonHawk]

I'm a little confused trying to put these words into the same sentence, but Kareem Jackson actually played fairly well (at least when I was watching).

He got beat on one touchdown, but other than that, yeah, he held his own. 

Mettenberger looked like a rookie making is first start.  But I still love his arm.  I still think he's going to be a good QB in this league. 

[Limey]

He got beat on one touchdown, but other than that, yeah, he held his own. 

Mettenberger looked like a rookie making is first start.  But I still love his arm.  I still think he's going to be a good QB in this league. 

What is this "good QBE" of which you speak?   I am not aware of such a thing. 

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Video of Schaub's first pass of the year.

[Lefty]

Another sunshiny anectdote:  Mrs. Hawk went to the knee doctor last week and they got to chatting about Clowney.  The doc told here he'd not examined Clowney, of course, but in his experience as a sports orthopedist, an average football player is back from that injury in three weeks.  The fact that it's now been seven and Clowney is not leads him to speculate either a) Clowney is the biggest out of shape fat ass ever or b) his knee is majorly fucked up far beyond what they're telling anyone. 

If I were you, I would find a new surgeon/orthopedist.  Didn't watch the game today and I don't know anything about yall's conditions (which is as much as he knew other people's, apparently),  but that's a load of horseshit..

[HudsonHawk]

If I were you, I would find a new surgeon/orthopedist.  Didn't watch the game today and I don't know anything about yall's conditions (which is as much as he knew other people's, apparently),  but that's a load of horseshit..

And your experience as an orthopedic surgeon is...? 

[austro]

He got beat on one touchdown, but other than that, yeah, he held his own. 

Mettenberger looked like a rookie making is first start.  But I still love his arm.  I still think he's going to be a good QB in this league. 

His throwing motion seems really effortless. There was one deep toss on the left sideline where he overthrew the receiver, must have been close to 50 yards, and it seemed like he was just playing catch.

[HudsonHawk]

His throwing motion seems really effortless. There was one deep toss on the left sideline where he overthrew the receiver, must have been close to 50 yards, and it seemed like he was just playing catch.

He overthrew three or four receivers today.  I think that's just being jacked up in his first start and all.  Perhaps it's a lack of accuracy, but I think he was pretty accurate at LSU.  And did I mention he has a fucking cannon?

[jbm]

There was a reason he lasted til round six.

[HudsonHawk]

There was a reason he lasted til round six.

Yeah, he was coming off of major knee surgery a few months earlier and has the congenital back problem.  But he may end up being a steal in the 6th round.  Or he may be nothing.  Time will tell. 

[Limey]

...has the congenital back problem. 

Well, if they're attached to your back....

[subnuclear]

It would be easier to root for Colt McCoy if the Texans had picked him up instead of Dan Snyder.

[jbm]

Watching a third-string McCoy highlighted just how bad the QB situation is for the Texans.

[chuck]

It would be easier to root for Colt McCoy if the Texans had picked him up instead of Dan Snyder.

He was playing against the Cowboys so I had no trouble rooting for him.

[Limey]

Watching a third-string McCoy every other NFL team highlighted just how bad the QB situation is for the Texans.

FIFY

[subnuclear]

He was playing against the Cowboys so I had no trouble rooting for him.

Of course, but I meant in future games.

[chuck]

Of course, but I meant in future games.

It does get murkier.

[Uncle Charlie]

Video of Schaub's first pass of the year.

He's getting better - it wasn't returned for a touchdown.

[Bench]

The retractable roof is Houston's unused time-share. 

[austro]

For some reason we're not getting the Texans game in Austin today. Oh well.

[Bench]

It was a close game until the missed FG followed by the banged up defense waving the white flag and giving up 70 yards on four rushes.

Meanwhile, Clowney spent the first half liking pictures of hot chicks on instagram. 

[Bench]

Expecting 3 and out or a turnover here to complete the trifecta.

[BudGirl]

For some reason we're not getting the Texans game in Austin today. Oh well.

Second Texans game I've watched this season.  If this were my team, I'd go crazy.  That defense seems to like the bump tackle instead of wrapping up a player.

[chuck]

If anything the special teams is worse this year.

[Limey]

It was a close game until the missed FG followed by the banged up defense waving the white flag and giving up 70 yards on four rushes.

I leaned over to Mrs Limey at one point and said that the corners need to get up on the receivers because they're chewing us up with these 8 - 13 yard slant passes.  No sooner was it out of my mouth than...BOOM...60 yard bomb down field.

This team is terrible in all aspects.  The one positive had been that the fat Aggie has been hitting his kicks...

However, regardless of what is or can be done to improve the various dysfunctional parts of this team, nothing will matter until they fix the black hole at QB.  Fitz is a decent fellow I'm sure, but he's not NFL quality by a long chalk.  They need to stop dicking around with band-aiding various positions, suck it up and draft/sign a fucking quarterback.  That would be a first for the franchise.

[Limey]

If this were my team, I'd go crazy.

It is and I am.

[HudsonHawk]

However, regardless of what is or can be done to improve the various dysfunctional parts of this team, nothing will matter until they fix the black hole at QB.  Fitz is a decent fellow I'm sure, but he's not NFL quality by a long chalk.  They need to stop dicking around with band-aiding various positions, suck it up and draft/sign a fucking quarterback.  That would be a first for the franchise.

This is the sad part...yesterday was pretty much Fitzpatrick's "A" game.  That's it.  He does not get any better than that. He's enough to beat the clearly inferior teams, but cannot compete with similarly talented ones.  So the Texans can continue to have playmakers at RB and WR, and have a decent defense, continue to be +3 in turnovers, and otherwise be capable of making the playoffs, and still manage to win 5 or 6 games.  That's been Fitz for 10+ years, and that'll be him this year and next. 

I simply do not understand the love affair with him.  I get that Mallet has never done anything, and he may be worse.  But I think you have to find out what you have in him.  If nothing else, he's the tallest player on the field and likely won't have as may passes batted down. 

[Limey]

I simply do not understand the love affair with him.  I get that Mallet has never done anything, and he may be worse.  But I think you have to find out what you have in him.  If nothing else, he's the tallest player on the field and likely won't have as may passes batted down.  

I wonder if yesterday was a tipping point.  Before the game started, you're hoping for a win to go 5-4, to which you get to add three lay-ups vs. the Titans and Jags, that's 8-4.  Eke out 2-2 from the other 4 games, and 10-6 might get you into the playoffs.  Losing yesterday likely torpedoed that strategy (if it was a real thing).  Maybe, now, they'll think about trying Mallet.

As an aside, it breaks my heart to see Daniels on the Ravens.  A more wretched team of scum and villainy would be hard to find.  Phillie fans are obnoxious (many examples of that at NRG yesterday), but the Ravens organization is a disgusting movie parody of a bad guys' team.  From Ray Lewis to Ray Rice, they are a horror of a franchise.

[HudsonHawk]

I wonder if yesterday was a tipping point.  Before the game started, you're hoping for a win to go 5-4, to which you get to add three lay-ups vs. the Titans and Jags, that's 8-4.  Eke out 2-2 from the other 4 games, and 10-6 might get you into the playoffs.  Losing yesterday likely torpedoed that strategy (if it was a real thing).  Maybe, now, they'll think about trying Mallet.

10-6 all but guarantees you a playoff birth.  9-7 may get you in, maybe not.  That's the hell of it.  The stars aligned this year with a weak schedule and league, so that the Texans with a mediocre QB could easily be 8-1 or 7-2 right now on their way to 10 or 11 wins, probably the division title, and possibly a home game or two in the playoffs.  That's the frustrating part of losing those close games that were there for the taking. 

As an aside, it breaks my heart to see Daniels on the Ravens.  A more wretched team of scum and villainy would be hard to find.  Phillie fans are obnoxious (many examples of that at NRG yesterday), but the Ravens organization is a disgusting movie parody of a bad guys' team.  From Ray Lewis to Ray Rice, they are a horror of a franchise.

Hung out with some Eagles fans yesterday.  They were fine.  No problems where I sat. 

[Nate Colbert]

For some reason we're not getting the Texans game in Austin today. Oh well.

I didn't understand that at first either but then realized with the Eagles (an NFC team) the visiting club, that turned it into a Fox game. And with Jerry's Joysticks playing at the same time, no TV.

[roadrunner]

What is the point of having a retractable roof on NRG?

[HudsonHawk]

What is the point of having a retractable roof on NRG?

So they can grow real grass on a really crappilly designed field that causes major injuries just by walking on it.  That, and apparently we taxpayers had $180MM burning a hole in our collective pocket.

[NeilT]

What is the point of having a retractable roof on NRG?

The rodeo.

[HudsonHawk]

The rodeo.

Has it ever been opened for the rodeo?

[hostros7]

What is the point of having a retractable roof on NRG?

Aerial blimp shots during the World Series?

[NeilT]

Has it ever been opened for the rodeo?

When it was built, as I recall, the Texans said they didn't care if there was a roof but they wanted to be able to play games in the open.  It was the rodeo that wanted the roof.

I guess in fact the Texans always close the roof, but that wasn't the plan when the stadium was built.

[HudsonHawk]

When it was built, as I recall, the Texans said they didn't care if there was a roof but they wanted to be able to play games in the open.  It was the rodeo that wanted the roof.

The rodeo wanted a dome.  The Texans wanted the retractable roof.  It's there because the Texans demanded it, and it cost the taxpayers of Harris County something like an extra $180MM (I'm guessing some slick bond attorney made a killing on that as well).  Now they refuse to use it.  

[roadrunner]

What is the real reason to close it yesterday?  I still haven't seen a response from the Texans on that.

Noise?  KC and Seattle are known as loud stadiums and both are open air.

Condition?  Does it really matter when the offense is totally dependent on Arian Foster?  Also, wouldn't you want conditions to be more unpredictable for the Eagles passing offense?

If the weather is bearable, open air sports is always better than domed sports.

[HudsonHawk]

What is the real reason to close it yesterday?  I still haven't seen a response from the Texans on that.

Noise?  KC and Seattle are known as loud stadiums and both are open air.

Condition?  Does it really matter when the offense is totally dependent on Arian Foster?  Also, wouldn't you want conditions to be more unpredictable for the Eagles passing offense?

If the weather is bearable, open air sports is always better than domed sports.

The reason is that half the fans want it closed and half want it open.  The complaining by the "open the roof" crowd is slightly less.  They opened it once and the non-stop bitching by fans who had to sit in the sun was unbearable.  The Texans simply said "we'll never make *that* mistake again".  So it's always closed, and no one has to sit in anything other than 72-degree, air-conditioned shade.

[Limey]

The reason is that half the fans want it closed and half want it open.  The complaining by the "open the roof" crowd is slightly less.  They opened it once and the non-stop bitching by fans who had to sit in the sun was unbearable.  The Texans simply said "we'll never make *that* mistake again".  So it's always closed, and no one has to sit in anything other than 72-degree, air-conditioned shade.

The sun is a heartless bitch.

[BizidyDizidy]

The reason is that half the fans want it closed and half want it open.  The complaining by the "open the roof" crowd is slightly less.  They opened it once and the non-stop bitching by fans who had to sit in the sun was unbearable.  The Texans simply said "we'll never make *that* mistake again".  So it's always closed, and no one has to sit in anything other than 72-degree, air-conditioned shade.

I was at that game in the sun, it was fucking terrible.

[chuck]

If the movement of the sun throughout the day were more predictable maybe people wouldn't be caught so off guard.

[Ty in Tampa]

I can say that sitting in direct sun/95 degrees/90% humidity may not feel like a traditional football environment but it beats the shit out of a dome.

[HudsonHawk]

I can say that sitting in direct sun/95 degrees/90% humidity may not feel like a traditional football environment but it beats the shit out of a dome.

People bitch incessantly about sitting in 68 degree/30% humidity.  That's the problem. 

[Bench]

What is the real reason to close it yesterday?  I still haven't seen a response from the Texans on that.

Noise?  KC and Seattle are known as loud stadiums and both are open air.

Condition?  Does it really matter when the offense is totally dependent on Arian Foster?  Also, wouldn't you want conditions to be more unpredictable for the Eagles passing offense?

If the weather is bearable, open air sports is always better than domed sports.

The reason I saw was that there couldn't be any wind for the BMX stunt halftime show and they can't just close the roof for halftime.

[HudsonHawk]

The reason I saw was that there couldn't be any wind for the BMX stunt halftime show and they can't just close the roof for halftime.

Ah yes...that traditional indoor sport...bicycling.  I was wondering if perhaps the guitar solo National Anthem required the roof as well. 

[Bench]

Ah yes...that traditional indoor sport...bicycling.  I was wondering if perhaps the guitar solo National Anthem required the roof as well. 

Apparently the bicycling included pyrotechnics which counter-intuitively cannot be done in open air either. 

[HudsonHawk]

Apparently the bicycling included pyrotechnics which counter-intuitively cannot be done in open air either. 

Yes, an open roof would mean that you weren't choking on smoke and could actually see the second half kickoff instead of the haze.  Makes perfect sense. 

[Limey]

I was wondering if perhaps the guitar solo National Anthem required the roof as well. 

Has that finished yet?

[BizidyDizidy]

BTW, if I'm remembering correctly the game where they pissed every one off was early in the season and they had a whole theory that the heat was a home field advantage, etc. I don't know that it's apples to apples with late October.

[Limey]

BTW, if I'm remembering correctly the game where they pissed every one off was early in the season and they had a whole theory that the heat was a home field advantage, etc. I don't know that it's apples to apples with late October.

Also, the Texans practice in a bubble...literally and figuratively.

[HudsonHawk]

BTW, if I'm remembering correctly the game where they pissed every one off was early in the season and they had a whole theory that the heat was a home field advantage, etc. I don't know that it's apples to apples with late October.

That was the infamous game against the Steelers, which is what lead to the 50/80 "rule", but the guy from the Texans told me they get thousands of complaints every game about the roof being closed/opened. The "close the roof" crowd is the loudest, so they just said "fuck it" and stopped opening it. 

[BudGirl]

I've never seen it open.

[Duke]

I did once.  The Big 12 championship game in 2005, UT v. Colorado.  Very pleasant.

[HudsonHawk]

I did once.  The Big 12 championship game in 2005, UT v. Colorado.  Very pleasant.

They open it quite a bit for the college games.  It was open Saturday for the Battle of the Piney Woods.  It's very nice. 

[Nate Colbert]

Mallett gets the start this week.

[Bench]

Mallett gets the start this week.

The bye week is an excellent time to show what he can do. 

[Limey]

The bye week is an excellent time to show what he can do. 

Do we still get to tailgate?  It's the only thing of value I'm getting out of my season tickets.

[HudsonHawk]

Watching some of these games today, the NFL is quickly becoming a joke with penalties against defensive backs.  There have been three times as many illegal contact/holding/PI calls in the first 9 weeks already than there were all of last year.  I understand the casual fan likes scoring, but it's gotten ridiculous. 

[austro]

It's amazing how things open up if the defense has to cover more than 15 yards downfield.

And I'm sure glad JJ Watt is on the Texans.

[Bench]

And I'm sure glad JJ Watt is on the Texans.

So is the punter.

[Nate Colbert]

JJ Watt 7  JJ Watt 7

[HudsonHawk]

4th and 28...let them punt the fucking ball.

[austro]

4th and 28...let them punt the fucking ball.

That was pretty ridiculous.

[HudsonHawk]

That was pretty ridiculous.

I love Watt's motor, but he ain't the brightest guy on the field. He's also kind of a prick.

[HudsonHawk]

O'Brien may be a quarterback guru, but he's a lousy play caller.

[Limey]

This is the Dog Shit Bowl (toilet bowl is not bad enough). 

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

I seem to have to work a lot on Sunday this fall. So I'm stuck with Marc Vandermeer and Andre Ware. I love Andre but he is always all over the place, he is having the same orgasms over Mallet that he had during Case Keenum's first game. How does Mallet really look?

[HudsonHawk]

I seem to have to work a lot on Sunday this fall. So I'm stuck with Marc Vandermeer and Andre Ware. I love Andre but he is always all over the place, he is having the same orgasms over Mallet that he had during Case Keenum's first game. How does Mallet really look?

Mallet looked pretty damn good. He missed a couple of throws, but the ball comes out, and it comes out on a line. He throws the ball like he has a purpose.  He's the complete opposite of Fitzpatrick's noodle arm.

[Bench]

Mallet looked pretty damn good. He missed a couple of throws, but the ball comes out, and it comes out on a line. He throws the ball like he has a purpose.  He's the complete opposite of Fitzpatrick's noodle arm.

And he didn't freak out of the pocket every other play either.

[austro]

And he didn't freak out of the pocket every other play either.

To be fair, that's probably because he knows he couldn't evade/outrun anybody. But at least knowing that frees him from having to make the decision.

[Limey]

To be fair, that's probably because he knows he couldn't evade/outrun anybody. But at least knowing that frees him from having to make the decision.

Also, he can see over the line in front of him.  Fitzpatrick can't.

[HudsonHawk]

To be fair, that's probably because he knows he couldn't evade/outrun anybody. But at least knowing that frees him from having to make the decision.

I don't really care if he can outrun anyone, as long as he gets rid of the ball.  He can throw the ball downfield, and he throws it with some zip, as if it's got somewhere to go.  I like that.  I know he's going to make some mistakes, but he's my kind of QB, at least physically.  Schaub was too, but he was a pussy.  We'll see about Mallett.

[Mr. Happy]

I don't really care if he can outrun anyone, as long as he gets rid of the ball.  He can throw the ball downfield, and he throws it with some zip, as if it's got somewhere to go.  I like that.  I know he's going to make some mistakes, but he's my kind of QB, at least physically.  Schaub was too, but he was a pussy.  We'll see about Mallett.

I watched the entire game because Mrs. Happy is a Browns fan. FWIW, I thought Mallett looked very good for a game-rusty QB. He clearly knows the offense and has a bazooka arm.

[sporadic]

I don't really care if he can outrun anyone, as long as he gets rid of the ball

I was really impressed how quickly he got the ball out.  Then again, when you can throw that freaking hard, it's easier to trust your reads (See-it throw-it rather than having to be completely timing-oriented).  Fitzpatrick could not throw a receiver open as the ball had no velocity...Mallett did that a couple of times, most notably the 4th down throw to Andre.  That pass had to be on a line to be completed.

[HudsonHawk]

Mallett did that a couple of times, most notably the 4th down throw to Andre.  That pass had to be on a line to be completed.

That's exactly what I was thinking.  Threading the needle requires not only accuracy, but sometimes the ability to throw it by someone.  That pass was a perfect example.  Fitz could not make that throw.  He could not make the throw that got picked in the end zone.  Mallett didn't make it either, but it wasn't because he didn't have the arm.  And I'm ok with that.  It was third down and the ball was intercepted 30+ yards down the field.  I've been waiting all year for a QB to try that throw. 

[MusicMan]

I have no idea why people are still talking (nationally) about the Texans signing Hoyer next year.  I see nothing from him that Mallett couldn't provide.

[HudsonHawk]

I have no idea why people are still talking (nationally) about the Texans signing Hoyer next year.  I see nothing from him that Mallett couldn't provide.

Well, he's more mobile, but in general, I agree.  Though I like Hoyer.  I think it would be a HUGE mistake for the Browns to go with Manziel over Hoyer. 

[mrpink]

I love Watt's motor, but he ain't the brightest guy on the field. He's also kind of a prick.

That's the first time I've heard this said.  Care to elaborate?

[HudsonHawk]

That's the first time I've heard this said.  Care to elaborate?

The finger waving (especially when you're down by several touchdowns), the jawing with fans, the diving at opponents' knees, the onfield taunting, the calling out opponents in post game press conferences...if a player like say Dez Bryant or Richard Sherman did the exact same things, all you'd hear about is what a prick and prima donna he is. 

[NeilT]

The finger waving (especially when you're down by several touchdowns), the jawing with fans, the diving at opponents' knees, the onfield taunting, the calling out opponents in post game press conferences...if a player like say Dez Bryant or Richard Sherman did the exact same things, all you'd hear about is what a prick and prima donna he is. 

I sat by him and Andre Johnson at a baseball game once.  One of them was perfectly decent to kids wanting autographs, one ignored them.  From my short exposure, he seems to be a nice guy off the field.

[HudsonHawk]

I sat by him and Andre Johnson at a baseball game once.  One of them was perfectly decent to kids wanting autographs, one ignored them.  From my short exposure, he seems to be a nice guy off the field.

Perhaps he is.  He's a prick on the field though. 

[MusicMan]

Perhaps he is.  He's a prick on the field though. 

I have no problem if someone morphs into a prick on the field if it makes him play like that.

[HudsonHawk]

I have no problem if someone morphs into a prick on the field if it makes him play like that.

I think one can play his best without being a prick or denigrating his opponents. 

[Duke]

I think one can play his best without being a prick or denigrating his opponents. 

The crap with the fans was completely bush.

[Bench]

The finger waving (especially when you're down by several touchdowns), the jawing with fans, the diving at opponents' knees, the onfield taunting, the calling out opponents in post game press conferences...if a player like say Dez Bryant or Richard Sherman did the exact same things, all you'd hear about is what a prick and prima donna he is. 

And self-appointed social media czar.

[roadrunner]

Maybe I'm used to the Biggio/Bagwell/Hakeem/Andre local legends who don't beg for the spotlight, but Watt is insufferable off the field.  If I saw him on the street I would go out of my way to avoid him just so his ego wouldn't be fed any more.

Fortunately for him, he's a very good football player so it's pretty easy to swallow.

[Limey]

Maybe I'm used to the Biggio/Bagwell/Hakeem/Andre local legends who don't beg for the spotlight, but Watt is insufferable off the field.  If I saw him on the street I would go out of my way to avoid him just so his ego wouldn't be fed any more.

Fortunately for him, he's a very good football player so it's pretty easy to swallow.

He is massively over-exposed right now, and I worry that it is all going to his head.  FTR, I think the sack-selfie is the current on-field low in prickishness (and a 21st century equivalent to the sharpie in the pad).  However, AFAIK, he hasn't murdered, raped or beaten anyone; doesn't seem like he would ever do so; and has the perfect attitude towards being a professional athlete.

At least when this floundering franchise latched on to a player with star appeal as its all-but sole representative, it picked one who's actually pretty good at the game.

[HudsonHawk]

 However, AFAIK, he hasn't murdered, raped or beaten anyone;

And he gets extra credit for that?

[GreatBagwellsBeard]

And he gets extra credit for that?

That's what you're supposed to do, you dumb motherfucker! What kind of ignorant shit is that? "I ain't never been to jail!" What do you want, a cookie?! You're not supposed to go to jail, you low-expectation-having motherfucker! - Chris Rock

[Limey]

And he gets extra credit for that?

This is the NFL we're talking about...

It's a sad reality, but the Texans is a franchise of which one can be proud, with regard to not having a murderer, rapist, or wife-beater as a star/pivotal player.  The Ravens just erected a statue to Ray Lewis FFS!  Roethlisberger is having a stand-out season for Pittsburgh, despite needing to have been put in jail years ago.  Aaron Hernandez remains in jail (I think), but Adrian Petersen may soon be making a return.  Ray Rice is still banned but, pandering commercials aside, there are dozens of known domestic abusers still active - none on the Texans though.

To be fair (and balanced), the NFL isn't the only sport with such troubles, but they are perhaps the worst at dealing with them, which is why they seem to have a vastly larger number of them.

[Limey]

That's what you're supposed to do, you dumb motherfucker! What kind of ignorant shit is that? "I ain't never been to jail!" What do you want, a cookie?! You're not supposed to go to jail, you low-expectation-having motherfucker! - Chris Rock

I believe he was accused of being a racist after that skit...

[roadrunner]

I'm in the extreme minority, but I actually think the NFL as a product has become very trite.  What are the notable football-related storylines this season?  The Arizona Cardinals success?  The shittiness of the NFC South?  Aaron Rodgers? 

None of those are interesting.  The memorable moments are all domestic abuse related.

[chuck]

I'm in the extreme minority, but I actually think the NFL as a product has become very trite.  What are the notable football-related storylines this season?  The Arizona Cardinals success?  The shittiness of the NFC South?  Aaron Rodgers? 

None of those are interesting.  The memorable moments are all domestic abuse related.

I can't watch the Olympics anymore because rather than just showing the fucking competition they have to talk about sprinter's step-sister's courageous battle with hair loss or a bobsledder's Chihuahua rescue or who knows what kind of stupid shit. I always wondered where I might go to find people more interested in story lines than competition. Now I know.

[HudsonHawk]

I can't watch the Olympics anymore because rather than just showing the fucking competition they have to talk about sprinter's step-sister's courageous battle with hair loss or a bobsledder's Chihuahua rescue or who knows what kind of stupid shit. I always wondered where I might go to find people more interested in story lines than competition. Now I know.

No shit.  "None of those are interesting"?  Then how about the game?

[roadrunner]

I figured I'd get hammered for that comment.

I watch plenty of NFL, it's impossible not to.  It's enjoyable...don't get me wrong.  But outside of watching the Texans there hasn't been one game this year that I've gone out of my way to watch.

On the flip side, the new playoff format has made college football a million times more interesting than before.  I'd argue the college season is more entertaining than the NFL, and the last 4-5 years my opinion has been the exact opposite.

[hostros7]

No shit.  "None of those are interesting"?  Then how about the game?

They just don't pull at the heart strings like offseason charitable circumcision in Africa.

[chuck]

They just don't pull at the heart strings like offseason charitable circumcision in Africa.

Wait, I thought we were supposed to be against that.

[HudsonHawk]

Wait, I thought we were supposed to be against that.

I wish you would have told me before I volunteered.

[Uncle Charlie]

So here are the Texans at 5-5 with 6 games to go, trailing Indy by a game in the division and the wild card by effectively 3 games (due to tiebreakers).  Chances of making the playoff are low, but not eliminated in part due to a relatively easy schedule.  If the Texans can beat the sinking Bengals, they'll have three "should win's", one 50/50 and then Indy.  It's not inconceivable that they could be 10-6, but likewise one could see a 7-9. 

Where do you think the boys will end up? My guess is 9-7, which given that we started the year with Fitzpatrick at the helm is pretty darn good.

[Mr. Happy]

  If the Texans can beat the sinking Bengals, they'll have three "should win's", one 50/50 and then Indy.  It's not inconceivable that they could be 10-6, but likewise one could see a 7-9. 

The Bengals ain't exactly sinking right now, having won convincingly on the road at New Orleans last week.

[BizidyDizidy]

But New Orleans is terrible.

[jbm]

So here are the Texans at 5-5 with 6 games to go, trailing Indy by a game in the division and the wild card by effectively 3 games (due to tiebreakers).  Chances of making the playoff are low, but not eliminated in part due to a relatively easy schedule.  If the Texans can beat the sinking Bengals, they'll have three "should win's", one 50/50 and then Indy.  It's not inconceivable that they could be 10-6, but likewise one could see a 7-9. 

Where do you think the boys will end up? My guess is 9-7, which given that we started the year with Fitzpatrick at the helm is pretty darn good.

I'm going with the optimistic 9-7 also, but it is kind of illusory as their talent still seems like 6-7 win level.  Having most of the picks this year do nothing has taken the shine off of real improvement in the coaching.  In other words, even though this year has been refreshing, the future is still ho-hum, IMO.

[Mr. Happy]

But New Orleans is terrible.

I agree that New Orleans is not as good as its been, but it still is in first place in an admittedly sorry division.

[MusicMan]

I'm going with the optimistic 9-7 also, but it is kind of illusory as their talent still seems like 6-7 win level.

Having Tennessee and Jacksonville in your division is like playing in the SEC: You get to schedule 4 automatic wins.

[HudsonHawk]

I agree that New Orleans is not as good as its been, but it still is in first place in an admittedly sorry division.

They're not in first place anymore.  Atlanta, who was 2-6 two weeks ago, is leading that sorry division. 

[HudsonHawk]

Unless Mallett really turns it on, I can't see them winning four more games.  8-8 is where I see them, which is four more wins than I thought they'd get when the season started.  Sadly, had they made a switch at QB earlier, they could easily be 7-3 right now, if not 8-2, cruising to a home playoff game. 

[chuck]

Well, you can discount my eternal optimism but when I think back on the team's losses only the game against the Giants (another terrible team) was basically a wire-to-wire ass kicking. All of the other games were eminently winnable, should have been won, frankly, but the team did one or another or a series of mind warpingly stupid shit. And that was with Grizzly Adams playing the most important position on the field.

So I don't think it's at all impossible for the Texans to win five more if they can somehow manage to keep the stupid dialed down to a low simmer.

[Limey]

I can't watch the Olympics anymore because rather than just showing the fucking competition they have to talk about sprinter's step-sister's courageous battle with hair loss or a bobsledder's Chihuahua rescue or who knows what kind of stupid shit.

That crap drives me crazy!  You know what they do on the BBC instead of soft-focus puff pieces?  They show you events involving notable athletes - not from Britain - or events with exciting outcomes - not involving athletes from Britain.  The way NBC is laser-focused on the US' own navel is a waste of airtime and a disservice to the event and to all the non-American athletes who have probably worked through greater adversity to get there.

[Limey]

So I don't think it's at all impossible for the Texans to win five more if they can somehow manage to keep the stupid dialed down to a low simmer.

5 more wins is eminently doable, for all the reasons you state.  Of course, at the start of the season, 14-2 was eminently doable, except that they could not avoid the dick-stepping that would have made such a thing a reality.

[HudsonHawk]

Well, you can discount my eternal optimism but when I think back on the team's losses only the game against the Giants (another terrible team) was basically a wire-to-wire ass kicking. All of the other games were eminently winnable, should have been won, frankly, but the team did one or another or a series of mind warpingly stupid shit. And that was with Grizzly Adams playing the most important position on the field.

So I don't think it's at all impossible for the Texans to win five more if they can somehow manage to keep the stupid dialed down to a low simmer.

You're an eternal sunshine pumper, and that's what we love about you.  But I don't see Mallett not tripping over his dick at least a few times.  After all, he's not a 10 year veteran like GrizzlyFitz.

[Limey]

You're an eternal sunshine pumper, and that's what we love about you.  But I don't see Mallett not tripping over his dick at least a few times.  After all, he's not a 10 year veteran like GrizzlyFitz.

A 10-year veteran who wasn't able to get them into the right play at the line of scrimmage.

[jbm]

"His poise on the sideline" made me laugh.

I assume getting into the right play is a call made at the line of scrimmage, determined by the defensive alignment.  Not sure if what seemed to be a greater emphasis on the run was a result of a pathetic Browns run defense, a defense that was stretched by a QB with an arm, or a different QB reading the defense.

[MusicMan]

Another stellar Rick Smith draft pick is looking for a job

[Limey]

Another stellar Rick Smith draft pick is looking for a job

To be fair, the year when Foster was out, Tate was a beast.  Being such with a busted rib, IIRC.

[chuck]

You're an eternal sunshine pumper, and that's what we love about you.  But I don't see Mallett not tripping over his dick at least a few times.  After all, he's not a 10 year veteran like GrizzlyFitz.

Teams will be able to take away some of what he does now that they have some tape. But he made an awful lot of good decisions Sunday and he made a lot of the throws he had to make. And, curiously, the mere threat of going downfield with the ball seems to open up the running game considerably.

[HudsonHawk]

Teams will be able to take away some of what he does now that they have some tape. But he made an awful lot of good decisions Sunday and he made a lot of the throws he had to make. And, curiously, the mere threat of going downfield with the ball seems to open up the running game considerably.

He did, but for one reason or another, the Brown coldn't get any pressure on him at all.  That will change at some point.  How he handles that will go a long way in evaluating his decision making skills.

[MusicMan]

He did, but for one reason or another, the Brown coldn't get any pressure on him at all.  That will change at some point.  How he handles that will go a long way in evaluating his decision making skills.

I recall reading that Mallett averaged something insanely low, like 2.05 seconds, on snap to throw for the game.  Led the league by far.

[austro]

I think I'd like to see the Texans use their first 5 or so picks in the upcoming draft on defensive backs. Of course, if the same talent "evaluators" are in charge of the picks, that probably won't help.

[subnuclear]

I think I'd like to see the Texans use their first 5 or so picks in the upcoming draft on defensive backs. Of course, if the same talent "evaluators" are in charge of the picks, that probably won't help.

The Oilers did that one year. I remember it working out pretty well except for the humiliating playoff losses and the team moving to another city in shame.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Dick Stepping Incorporated.

[austro]

That's one frustrating team.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

The only difference was the roof being open. Mallett has no touch. It's always hammer down. Every pass.

[HudsonHawk]

I think I'd like to see the Texans use their first 5 or so picks in the upcoming draft on defensive backs. Of course, if the same talent "evaluators" are in charge of the picks, that probably won't help.

Exactly. They thought Brandon Harris could play. He's the worst corner in football. You cannot win if you start Brandon Harris.

[HudsonHawk]

The only difference was the roof being open. Mallett has no touch. It's always hammer down. Every pass.

Velocity wasn't the problem, accuracy was. He simply missed too many throws. He had the arm strength, but not the accuracy. He's still light years better than Fitzpatrick who has neither.

[chuck]

Exactly. They thought Brandon Harris could play. He's the worst corner in football. You cannot win if you start Brandon Harris.

They drafted Harris then Roc Carmichael and then Shiloh Keo, all with Richard Sherman sitting there undrafted.

So, yeah, draft all the DBs you want but don't be surprised when they all suck.

[HudsonHawk]

O'Brien's worst game ever.  Horrible calls, kindergartenesque clock management at the end of the game...Gary Kubiak would have been proud.

[jbm]

Is Harris even on the roster?  I thought the DBs looked OK today. They gave too much cushion early, but made lots of plays late.

Mallett was awful; I can't envision any excuse for that level of inaccuracy. So, they still need to find a QB, along with about every other position.  And of course, with their talent evaluation, that isn't likely.

[HudsonHawk]

Is Harris even on the roster?  I thought the DBs looked OK today. They gave too much cushion early, but made lots of plays late.

Sorry, I had Harris on the brain. Darryl Morris is who was horrible today. Harris was only historically horrible. The DBs were generally awful today, with the exception of Joseph. Though I'll give the defense credit they kept the Texans in a game that statistically should have been a blowout.

Mallett was awful; I can't envision any excuse for that level of inaccuracy. So, they still need to find a QB, along with about every other position.  And of course, with their talent evaluation, that isn't likely.

He wasn't awful, but he wasn't good either. He had his moments. He's still by far their best option. Inexplicably, O'Brien went back to his old philosophy of being afraid to throw the ball downfield. The Bengals did what every team has done, crowd the box and dare the Texans to throw it more than 10 yards. Last week they did and it worked. Today, they wouldn't. But they had first and goal three times and managed 6 points. That's not going to beat anyone.

[Uncle Charlie]

Sorry, I had Harris on the brain. Darryl Morris is who was horrible today. Harris was only historically horrible. The DBs were generally awful today, with the exception of Joseph. Though I'll give the defense credit they kept the Texans in a game that statistically should have been a blowout.

I actually think Morris did a pretty good job against one of the best WR in the game.  The frustrating thing was the lack of pressure on Dalton - he had all freaking day.  I honestly cannot remember seeing him under pressure.

[austro]

I actually think Morris did a pretty good job against one of the best WR in the game.  The frustrating thing was the lack of pressure on Dalton - he had all freaking day.  I honestly cannot remember seeing him under pressure.

He got hit a couple of times, but overall it was very disappointing. I was looking forward to him throwing about 4 interceptions in the face of intense pressure. Instead, nada, and having the corners play 10 yards off the receivers didn't help. Just terrible all the way around.

[HudsonHawk]

I actually think Morris did a pretty good job against one of the best WR in the game.  The frustrating thing was the lack of pressure on Dalton - he had all freaking day.  I honestly cannot remember seeing him under pressure.

I'm not sure I can say allowing your opponent the best game of his already stellar career is really a "pretty good job". Yes, Green is good, but Morris gave up more receptions and yards than any corner who has ever guarded him.  Relative to everyone else, Morris performance today was the worst in the history of A.J. green

[Uncle Charlie]

Yes, Green is good, but Morris gave up more receptions and yards than any corner who has ever guarded him.

I'm not in a place to look, but I'd be surprised if green set any kind of yards record today.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

I'm not in a place to look, but I'd be surprised if green set any kind of yards record today.

As a matter of fact, he got more yards and touchdowns just last week. He's really good.

[HudsonHawk]

I'm not in a place to look, but I'd be surprised if green set any kind of yards record today.

ESPN said he did. They may be lying. But it doesn't change my point:  Morris wasn't particularly good today. In fact, he was awful.

[BizidyDizidy]

Most catches ever.  He's had more yards 9 times (and obviously didn't find the endzone today, which he has 33 times).

[BizidyDizidy]

Mallet injured - return of the walrus.

[Lefty]

Mallet injured - return of the walrus.

Played the whole game with an injured right pec, will get MRI.  Obviously affected the gameplan and his accuracy.

[HudsonHawk]

Mallet injured - return of the walrus.

Well, that sucks. Fitzpatrick will no double somehow feel vindicated. 

[Mr. Happy]

Well, that sucks. Fitzpatrick will no double somehow feel vindicated. 

This is a quote from Rotowire about Fitzpatrick coming back if Mallett is done for the year: "[the Texans] know what they have in Fitzpatrick and it isn’t pretty."

[JimR]

HOW 'BOUT THEM COWBOYS!!!!!!

[MusicMan]

Well, that sucks. Fitzpatrick will no double somehow feel vindicated. 

I think that's unfair to a guy who has conducted himself gracefully.

[HudsonHawk]

I think that's unfair to a guy who has conducted himself gracefully.

He had rather pointed words for the Texans when it was announced Mallett was starting.  They weren't particularly graceful. 

[sporadic]

HOW 'BOUT THEM COWBOYS!!!!!!

YOU BET!  I am loving those earth-movers they have up front

[BudGirl]

HOW 'BOUT THEM COWBOYS!!!!!!

I watched that game on mute, but I watch almost all SNF games on mute.  Chris Collinsworth drives me crazy.

[BudGirl]

YOU BET!  I am loving those earth-movers they have up front

Thursday is going to be super uber tough.

[sporadic]

Thursday is going to be super uber tough.

All division games are. I like their chances if they give it to 29 at least 25 times, though.

[chuck]

I watched that game on mute, but I watch almost all SNF games on mute.  Chris Collinsworth drives me crazy.

I realize that this admission will tarnish my credentials as the Mikey of the Internet but I like Collinsworth just fine.

[HudsonHawk]

I realize that this admission will tarnish my credentials as the Mikey of the Internet but I like Collinsworth just fine.

Me too.  I think he's pretty insightful. 

[HudsonHawk]

Mallett done for the season. 

[Limey]

Mallett done for the season. 

Texans' Back-Up QB = Spinal Tap's Drummer

[Ty in Tampa]

I realize that this admission will tarnish my credentials as the Mikey of the Internet but I like Collinsworth just fine.

I like him as well. I can't help but think he hits bong every other commercial break, though.

[HudsonHawk]

I like him as well. I can't help but think he hits bong every other commercial break, though.

On a side note, the Bucs, at 2-9, are still very much alive for a playoff spot.  Five wins could win that division. 

[Ty in Tampa]

On a side note, the Bucs, at 2-9, are still very much alive for a playoff spot.  Five wins could win that division. 

Holy shit, there's some bad football being played down here. The Bucs are a shambles but I expected it. The rest of the division is a surprise to me.

[chuck]

I keep waiting for Atlanta to stop sucking and apparently I'm going to have to wait some more.

[Ty in Tampa]

I keep waiting for Atlanta to stop sucking and apparently I'm going to have to wait some more.

That was some Kubiak-style dick-stomping yesterday.

[austro]

I watched that game on mute, but I watch almost all SNF games on mute.  Chris Collinsworth drives me crazy.

Chuckie Gruden is the guy that gets on my nerves.

[HudsonHawk]

Ryan Fitzpatrick era part deaux. At least the roof is open.

[austro]

We're officially in some sort of bizarro world.

[NeilT]

This was the first Texans game I've seen this season. I don't know what you people are talking about. Fitzpatrick must be the best quarterback in the NFL. I'm planning on buying a jersey.

[Limey]

I'm assuming that the Titans have near-zero pass rushing abilities.  Still, that was fun to watch.

Watt's What's glaringly obvious, and a little irritating, is the Texans' glorification of JJ.  Fitz threw for 6 TDs, two of which went to Hopkins, who himself had a banner day including a couple of long 3rd down catches that set up TDs for others, including Watt.  Guess who's TD catch was the "Play of the Game", announced about 10 seconds after it happened...

Watt is awesome; but he gets plenty of airtime.  How about letting the other players have a little time in the sun?

[NeilT]

I'm assuming that the Titans have near-zero pass rushing abilities.  Still, that was fun to watch.

Watt's What's glaringly obvious, and a little irritating, is the Texans' glorification of JJ.  Fitz threw for 6 TDs, two of which went to Hopkins, who himself had a banner day including a couple of long 3rd down catches that set up TDs for others, including Watt.  Guess who's TD catch was the "Play of the Game", announced about 10 seconds after it happened...

Watt is awesome; but he gets plenty of airtime.  How about letting the other players have a little time in the sun?

That was a little obnoxious.  I could have picked several plays that were more interesting.

Someone behind us said that Fitzpatrick performed completely differently when he had a bit more time.  Someone else said that three weeks seemed to be just the right amount.

[HudsonHawk]

I'm assuming that the Titans have near-zero pass rushing abilities.  Still, that was fun to watch.

Watt's What's glaringly obvious, and a little irritating, is the Texans' glorification of JJ.  Fitz threw for 6 TDs, two of which went to Hopkins, who himself had a banner day including a couple of long 3rd down catches that set up TDs for others, including Watt.  Guess who's TD catch was the "Play of the Game", announced about 10 seconds after it happened...

Watt is awesome; but he gets plenty of airtime.  How about letting the other players have a little time in the sun?

Hopkins saved Fitzy's butt on the first couple of drives.

And I'm already getting tired of Watt and some of his antics. 

[Limey]

Hopkins saved Fitzy's butt on the first couple of drives.

Absolutely.  He was the star of the day, IMHO.

And I'm already getting tired of Watt and some of his antics. 

He's getting Penced by the Texans.  They are over-exposing him at the expense of his teammates and as such will burn him out faster in the eyes of fans.

[HudsonHawk]

He's getting Penced by the Texans.  They are over-exposing him at the expense of his teammates and as such will burn him out faster in the eyes of fans.

Not to mention he's been acting like a dick. 

[Limey]

Not to mention he's been acting like a dick. 

He didn't choose to go in on that short-and-goal play; that was on the coaches (possibly under orders from Mcnair and or his NFL puppet masters).  That play should've gone to Hopkins, because he'd earned it (and is actually play offense full time).  There was no need for Watt to be there...at all.

[HudsonHawk]

He didn't choose to go in on that short-and-goal play; that was on the coaches (possibly under orders from Mcnair and or his NFL puppet masters).  That play should've gone to Hopkins, because he'd earned it (and is actually play offense full time).  There was no need for Watt to be there...at all.

I don't mind that he was in there.  Whatever gives you the best chance to score, and Watt's the best tight end they have.  But there was no need for the dirty hit on Mettenberger.  There is no need for the finger wagging.  There is no need for the being a dick to the reporters post-game.  There is no need for a lot of the douchebag things he does.  Yet he does.  He's hard to watch sometimes. 

[Duke]

I don't mind that he was in there.  Whatever gives you the best chance to score, and Watt's the best tight end they have.  But there was no need for the dirty hit on Mettenberger.  There is no need for the finger wagging.  There is no need for the being a dick to the reporters post-game.  There is no need for a lot of the douchebag things he does.  Yet he does.  He's hard to watch sometimes. 

Agreednm HH.  If he was the all business, no bull shit guy he says he is then he wouledn't do any of that crap.  My high school coach would have yanked him around by his facemask for that shit.

[Limey]

I don't mind that he was in there.  Whatever gives you the best chance to score, and Watt's the best tight end they have.  But there was no need for the dirty hit on Mettenberger.  There is no need for the finger wagging.  There is no need for the being a dick to the reporters post-game.  There is no need for a lot of the douchebag things he does.  Yet he does.  He's hard to watch sometimes. 

I agree that he is morphing into the showboat version of himself, which is not a good thing.

Meanwhile, re tight ends, you are absolutely right.  Can we not get OD back, FFS?!

[Bench]

Clowney to the IR.  Will have surgery on his right knee.

They should of drafted VY.

[HudsonHawk]

Clowney to the IR.  Will have surgery on his right knee.

Wait...I was assured in September that he'd be back in 4 to 6 weeks, and any speculation that his injury is worse than originally reported is "a load of horseshit". 

[Uncle Charlie]

Wait...I was assured in September that he'd be back in 4 to 6 weeks, and any speculation that his injury is worse than originally reported is "a load of horseshit". 

Who said it was worse? Maybe it's just not any better?

[HudsonHawk]

Who said it was worse? Maybe it's just not any better?

Considering the original report was that it was only bad enough that he needed one surgery and would be out 4-6 weeks, and now he needs a second surgery and will be out for umpteen more weeks, unless you consider additional surgery and time missed as *better*, it is, by denfition, worse than originally reported.  

[Uncle Charlie]

Considering the original report was that it was only bad enough that he needed one surgery and would be out 4-6 weeks, and now he needs a second surgery and will be out for umpteen more weeks, unless you consider additional surgery and time missed as *better*, it is, by denfition, worse than originally reported.  

Just messin' with ya.

[Limey]

I agree that he is morphing into the showboat version of himself, which is not a good thing.

Aaaaand now he's on South Park.  I wonder if he kills Kenny...

[HudsonHawk]

Latest on Clowney...had to have the dreaded microfracture surgery on his knee.  Out at least 9 months, more likely all of next year at a minimum.  Very possible the end of his career. 

[Ebby Calvin]

Latest on Clowney...had to have the dreaded microfracture surgery on his knee.  Out at least 9 months, more likely all of next year at a minimum.  Very possible the end of his career. 

He had a career?

[HudsonHawk]

He had a career?

ZING!!

[chuck]

McNair should follow Crane's lead and extend Rick Smith's contract immediately before another franchise snatches him away.

[roadrunner]

Latest on Clowney...had to have the dreaded microfracture surgery on his knee.  Out at least 9 months, more likely all of next year at a minimum.  Very possible the end of his career. 

Maybe Luhnow is on to something with the whole Aiken situation?

[Limey]

Latest on Clowney...had to have the dreaded microfracture surgery on his knee.  Out at least 9 months, more likely all of next year at a minimum.  Very possible the end of his career. 

I guess now we know why he tanked the final year of college.  Just wanted the knee to hold together long enough to get to the draft, and a payday.

[roadrunner]

Very possible the end of his career. 

I'm not seeing this anywhere.

[HudsonHawk]

I'm not seeing this anywhere.

Then you saw it here first!

[roadrunner]

Then you saw it here first!

And I will now repeat it elsewhere.  Internet = fact.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Kobe Bryant got a year or two from his procedure, Greg Oden got squat. This is horrible new for his football career. Total bummer.

[HudsonHawk]

Kobe Bryant got a year or two from his procedure, Greg Oden got squat. This is horrible new for his football career. Total bummer.

There are examples of "successful" return from it, but many do not, and few return to their former selves.  It's a surgery of last resort, what's been referred to as a "salvage procedure".  There is a measureable chance Clowney may never see the field again. 

[chuck]

And I will now repeat it elsewhere.  Internet = fact.

Almost. HH = FACT

[HudsonHawk]

Almost. HH = FACT

You can bet the hacienda on it.

[chuck]

You can bet the hacienda on it.

But can you really call it a hacienda if it's just a hectare or two?

[HudsonHawk]

But can you really call it a hacienda if it's just a hectare or two?

True.  I'd probably only bet the manzana.

[HudsonHawk]

On another Texans note:  Got the annual email from Bob McNair telling me it's time to pony up for those playoff tickets.  Two rounds of home playoff games...due next week.  Gotta love the NFL.

[chuck]

On another Texans note:  Got the annual email from Bob McNair telling me it's time to pony up for those playoff tickets.  Two rounds of home playoff games...due next week.  Gotta love the NFL.

You keep paying for it, yo. In the inconceivably unlikely event that the Texans do not make the playoffs do they return your payment with interest? How many times did the email include the word 'outstanding?'

[NeilT]

You keep paying for it, yo. In the inconceivably unlikely event that the Texans do not make the playoffs do they return your payment with interest? How many times did the email include the word 'outstanding?'

i think the texans charge you interest for having to hold your money.

[HudsonHawk]

They "return" your money in February, and without interest.  They did explain they were required by NFL rules to collect this money, even though the possibility of them hosting a playoff game was remote.

[hostros7]

To be fair, they changed the policy this season so that season ticket holders are not in fact 0% interest loan providers in the event that home playoff games are not played.

Season Ticket Members now have the option to enroll in our  "Pay As We Play"
Deposit program when paying online with a credit/debit card*. By choosing the  Pay As We Play deposit program, you are not required to pay for your 2-game playoff package (tickets and parking) in full by the payment deadline.  Instead, you will enroll your card in the program to be charged on a later date.  You must sign up no later than, Wednesday, December 17th, 2014.

By enrolling in the "Pay As We Play " program, you will secure your seat location(s) for any potential home playoff game(s) hosted by the Texans. Once it is determined that NRG Stadium will host a playoff game, the enrolled card will be charged the ticket amount for the Wildcard/Divisional game. Should the Texans advance to host the AFC Championship game, the same enrolled card will be charged the ticket amount for the AFC Championship game.

[HudsonHawk]

To be fair, they changed the policy this season so that season ticket holders are not in fact 0% interest loan providers in the event that home playoff games are not played.

The good news is that by this Sunday, there's a good chance they'll know if they're hosting a playoff game or not.  Still, it's a "0% interest loan" for about 6 weeks.  I'm not particularly worried that they'll take my money and bet it on a horse.  Maybe an outside linebacker, but not a horse. 

[HudsonHawk]

And speaking of Clowney....

The yahoos on 610 had a doctor on this morning talkin about Clowney and the microfracture procedure.  Doctor indicated the following:

1.  Clowney was fine when they drafted him, the injury came since he's been a Texan.  He stopped short of saying it was when Clowney hit a hole in the NRG turf, as Clowney indicated, but said "it certainly looked like the type of play where that injury could happen."

2.  The Texans knew all along that it was more than a torn meniscus.  Doctor said it was likely that the lesion on his knee wasn't visible on the MRI, but they had to have seen it when they did the first surgery.

3.  Clowney's meniscus injury was likely the type that could not be repaired, and removal was the only viable option.

4.  Microfracture wasn't an option while Clowney was on the table with the first surgery for liability reasons. 

5.  The chances Clowney plays again are pretty good.  Probably 75%.

6.  The chances Clowney has a career longer than 4 years are about 30%.

7.  Chances Clowney can become the type of player worthy of a #1 overall pick are pretty much zero.  His ceiling is now "quality NFL player".

8.  One thing Clowney has going for him is that he's still young.  Anecdotal evidence suggests younger patients have a higher likelihood of successful return.

[Limey]

The good news is that by this Sunday, there's a good chance they'll know if they're hosting a playoff game or not.  Still, it's a "0% interest loan" for about 6 weeks.  I'm not particularly worried that they'll take my money and bet it on a horse.  Maybe an outside linebacker, but not a horse. 

As long as you aren't paying credit card interest on the payment (and if you are, you shouldn't be buying Texans tickets in the first place), your opportunity cost for that money is about 0.1% annually (assuming otherwise you'd have the money in a savings account), or 0.0115% for the 6 week period.

Regardless, it's still bullshit that they ask you to pay up in advance, especially as losses to the Colts and Ravens will make the suggestion of a playoff game laughable.

[HudsonHawk]

Regardless, it's still bullshit that they ask you to pay up in advance, especially as losses to the Colts and Ravens will make the suggestion of a playoff game laughable.

Rules is rules.  I get that the NFL can't wait until the Tuesday before the first playoff Saturday to try to start collecting money.  And I'm ok with it.

[Ty in Tampa]

As long as you aren't paying credit card interest on the payment (and if you are, you shouldn't be buying Texans tickets in the first place), your opportunity cost for that money is about 0.1% annually (assuming otherwise you'd have the money in a savings account), or 0.0115% for the 6 week period.

Regardless, it's still bullshit that they ask you to pay up in advance, especially as losses to the Colts and Ravens will make the suggestion of a playoff game laughable.

I'm sure the returns they get on the millions they take in is a bit less negligible.

[BUWebguy]

I'm sure the returns they get on the millions they take in is a bit less negligible.

"It's very complicated. It's aggregate, so I'm talking about fractions of a penny here. And over time they add up to a lot."

[Limey]

"It's very complicated. It's aggregate, so I'm talking about fractions of a penny here. And over time they add up to a lot."

I thought that was funny.  Then I realised that it's accurate.  Then I got confused as to whether laugh or get annoyed*.


* On a day when Congress is holding the entirety of the Federal budget hostage to the question of whether we should reinstate the federal backstop to credit default swaps, my ability to find this funny is challenged.

[chuck]

The good news is that by this Sunday, there's a good chance they'll know if they're hosting a playoff game or not.  Still, it's a "0% interest loan" for about 6 weeks.  I'm not particularly worried that they'll take my money and bet it on a horse.  Maybe an outside linebacker, but not a horse. 

Obviously they'd be better off betting on a horse.

[Bench]

1.  Clowney was fine when they drafted him, the injury came since he's been a Texan.  He stopped short of saying it was when Clowney hit a hole in the NRG turf, as Clowney indicated, but said "it certainly looked like the type of play where that injury could happen."

Has the team ever made an attempt to reasonably justify maintaining the current turf?

[HudsonHawk]

Has the team ever made an attempt to reasonably justify maintaining the current turf?

Other than denying it's a problem?  The biggest thing I hear is that the players hate artificial turf, even the new field turf stuff.  Which is true.  But they also hate crappy grass fields, and Clowney now makes at least four Texans starters in the last five years who have suffered season (or career) ending injuries on non-contact plays due to the turf.  Couple that with constant complaints from other teams, and they may have to move on it soon, whether they like it or not.

[Lefty]

Has the team ever made an attempt to reasonably justify maintaining the current turf?

I was told, and do not trust me or quote me on this, that they can't do anything about it until the punter's lawsuit is settled.  De facto admission of guilt or somesuch.

[hostros7]

I was told, and do not trust me or quote me on this, that they can't do anything about it until the punter's lawsuit is settled.  De facto admission of guilt or somesuch.

If that's the truth, then the collective IQ of the organization is lower than the Astros' average win total over the last three seasons.  What's the most that would have to be offered to settle with a mediocre punter? $5mm for  risk adjusted loss of future earnings?  If the clowney injury was indeed turf-related, the team just lit at least $10mm on fire as a result of him contributing little to nothing this year and next.

[chuck]

Hartman's not even suing the team; he's suing the stadium's management company and the county agency.

[Bench]

I was told, and do not trust me or quote me on this, that they can't do anything about it until the punter's lawsuit is settled.  De facto admission of guilt or somesuch.

That seems unlikely.  For the very concern that fixing a problem can be interpreted as an admission of guilt, subsequent remedial measures that may have prevented an injury would not be admissible in that lawsuit. 

[Limey]

Texans score first.  That's a rarity and a pleasant surprise. 

[austro]

Texans score first.  That's a rarity and a pleasant surprise. 

Fixed it.

[HudsonHawk]

Fitzpatrick out. Savage in. Someone tell O'Brien he's allowed to run to the left behind his All-Pro tackle

[Limey]

Fitzpatrick out.

Broken leg.  It's Savage all the way now. 

[HudsonHawk]

O'Brien...NO!!!!!

[austro]

The offensive line is getting dominated today. And it doesn't help that the Indy D has absolutely nothing to fear from Savage. On the bright side, Griffin just caught a ball. I think that's the first one I've ever seen him hold onto.

[Limey]

Starting to get interesting. 

[HudsonHawk]

Starting to get interesting. 

Defense has stepped up so far. Savage getting his feet under him. Posey steps on his dick.

[Navin R Johnson]

What a complete waste Posey is.  Another 3rd round shit sandwich served up by Rick Smith.

[HudsonHawk]

Defense now getting gashed on the ground by the worst rushing team in the league.

[Limey]

Big stop (on the first passing play of the drive). 

[HudsonHawk]

Well shit. The Texans got the game they wanted, but once again, scoring 3 points on offense isn't going to beat anybody.

[Limey]

So if Savage is done too, what happens?

[Dark Star]

So if Savage is done too, what happens?

This?

[Bench]

So if Savage is done too, what happens?

Shane Falco

[HudsonHawk]

So if Savage is done too, what happens?

They sign a couple guys off the scrap heap.  Which is getting thin. 

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

Shane Falco

Fuck Falco, got to go with Eddie Martel.

[NeilT]

I bet Tim Tebow's available.

[HudsonHawk]

I guess it's safe to say that ends Fitzpatrick's tenure as a Texan, and probably his career.  A tough way to go out.

[Limey]

Texans' Back-Up QB = Spinal Tap's Drummer

I hate being right. 

[Nate Colbert]

So if Savage is done too, what happens?

Case Keenum of course.

[HudsonHawk]

Case Keenum of course.

Rumors flying around about possibly working out Vince Young and/or Tim Tebow, but since neither have taken a snap in a long time, I can't imagine they'd be an option. 

[Uncle Charlie]

Rumors flying around about possibly working out Vince Young and/or Tim Tebow, but since neither have taken a snap in a long time, I can't imagine they'd be an option. 

Agree - hard to imagine.  Case is probably the best option.

[HudsonHawk]

Agree - hard to imagine.  Case is probably the best option.

I was thinking about who else was out there...Josh Freeman maybe? 

[HudsonHawk]

On an unrelated note...I see where the NFL will be narrowing the goal posts for the Pro Bowl this year, as an experiment to possibly make it a permanent change. 

[Bench]

Agree - hard to imagine.  Case is probably the best option.

It's tough to complain about the hometown kid.  It will be fun to see him back out there and at least he'll do his best to put the team in the best draft position it can be in.

[HudsonHawk]

It's tough to complain about the hometown kid.  It will be fun to see him back out there and at least he'll do his best to put the team in the best draft position it can be in.

I'm assuming he doesn't start?  Does he?

[jbm]

Can't imagine why he would.  It would be Savage if able, then the guy they already have on the practice squad (can't remember his name), and then Keenum.

[Bench]

I'm assuming he doesn't start?  Does he?

I guess Savage might start depending on the extent of the injury he suffered in the penultimate play.  Either way, the shoddy Ravens secondary won't be tested much this Sunday.

[HudsonHawk]

I guess Savage might start depending on the extent of the injury he suffered in the penultimate play.  Either way, the shoddy Ravens secondary won't be tested much this Sunday.

I'm assuming even if Savage is out, Thad Lewis starts. 

[HudsonHawk]

Can't imagine why he would.  It would be Savage if able, then the guy they already have on the practice squad (can't remember his name), and then Keenum.

Thad Lewis.  And he's not on the practice squad, he's on the active 53-man roster, though he hasn't been active for any game yet. 

[HudsonHawk]

Listening to O'Brien's presser today. Savage out this Sunday for sure, possibly longer. Keenum and Lewis the guys. Did not say who will start, but they'll make a decision probably early this week. He hinted that Keenum had the inside track. Andre will be back Sunday.

[jbm]

It sucks that neither Mallett nor Savage got much of an audition, as it doesn't shed any light on how badly the club needs to pursue a QB in the off-season.