Author Topic: Uncomfortable Movie Plot Summaries (Read 5012 times)

WakePhil · « **on:** October 17, 2012, 11:45:24 am »

Saw this on Battle Red Blog. Lots of examples in the article and comments.

Quote

Uncomfortable Plot Summaries is a game wherein you summarize popular movies in a succinctly Debbie Downer way. Jurassic Park? A theme park's grand opening is pushed back.

Forrest Gump: Retarded man brings chocolate to a girl he has stalked for 30 years.

Go.

My baseball related submissions:

Good baseball player quits, returns, damages stuff.
Baseball team wins American League pennant; forgets about the World Series.

Noe · « **Reply #1 on:** October 17, 2012, 11:56:58 am »

Quote from: WakePhil on October 17, 2012, 11:45:24 am

Saw this on Battle Red Blog. Lots of examples in the article and comments.

My baseball related submissions:

Good baseball player quits, returns, damages stuff.
Baseball team wins American League pennant; forgets about the World Series.

The last one is "Major Leagues", is the other one "The Natural" or the "The Rookie"? The "quits" part has me stumped.

WakePhil · « **Reply #2 on:** October 17, 2012, 11:58:37 am »

Quote from: Noe in Austin on October 17, 2012, 11:56:58 am

The last one is "Major Leagues", is the other one "The Natural" or the "The Rookie"? The "quits" part has me stumped.

The Natural. He quit because he was shot.

Limey · « **Reply #3 on:** October 17, 2012, 12:02:11 pm »

Quote from: Noe in Austin on October 17, 2012, 11:56:58 am

The last one is "Major Leagues", is the other one "The Natural" or the "The Rookie"? The "quits" part has me stumped.

I think it's Bull Durham.

Meanwhile:

* Kid takes over baseball team; loses.

WakePhil · « **Reply #4 on:** October 17, 2012, 12:14:12 pm »

Quote from: Limey on October 17, 2012, 12:02:11 pm

I think it's Bull Durham.

Meanwhile:

* Kid takes over baseball team; loses.

I was going for Major League with my first one, but later realized it also works decently well for Moneyball.

Your's is Little Big League.

Desire to make amends with dead father causes man and his family to make a number of foolish fiscal decisions. Contagious hallucination ensues.

astrosfan76 · « **Reply #5 on:** October 17, 2012, 12:25:45 pm »

Quote from: WakePhil on October 17, 2012, 12:14:12 pm

I was going for Major League with my first one, but later realized it also works decently well for Moneyball.

Your's is Little Big League.

Desire to make amends with dead father causes man and his family to make a number of foolish fiscal decisions. Contagious hallucination ensues.

Field of Dreams

Out-of-place kid loses step-father's prized baseball to oversized canine and his blind owner while trying to gain the acceptance of his peers.

Waldo · « **Reply #6 on:** October 17, 2012, 12:35:36 pm »

The Sandlot.

Drunk has-been is hired to counsel women, advises them against the use of their tear ducts during competition.

Ron Brand · « **Reply #7 on:** October 17, 2012, 12:51:15 pm »

A star pitcher forces his desperate team into making poor decisions. Despite this, the team ends up in the World Series, with Death in the background.

Ron Brand · « **Reply #8 on:** October 17, 2012, 12:52:49 pm »

Fat guy sells his soul for wins.

Bench · « **Reply #9 on:** October 17, 2012, 12:57:03 pm »

A child breaks his arm and must resist being exploited by his single-mother's boyfriend.

hostros7 · « **Reply #10 on:** October 17, 2012, 01:08:21 pm »

Quote from: Bench on October 17, 2012, 12:57:03 pm

A child breaks his arm and must resist being exploited by his single-mother's boyfriend.

well done

hostros7 · « **Reply #11 on:** October 17, 2012, 01:12:05 pm »

Aging athlete meets female in distress, explores his own physical and emotional limitations.

NeilT · « **Reply #12 on:** October 17, 2012, 01:14:45 pm »

Quote from: hostros7 on October 17, 2012, 01:12:05 pm

Aging athlete meets female in distress, explores his own physical and emotional limitations.

Actually, that's a pretty accurate description.

hostros7 · « **Reply #13 on:** October 17, 2012, 01:20:47 pm »

Schizo school teacher comes to terms with the inadequacy of both his team and himself as juxtaposed to his significant other.

GreatBagwellsBeard · « **Reply #14 on:** October 17, 2012, 01:33:11 pm »

Failed minor leaguer moves into management, pisses off his co-workers, can't beat the Yankees.

OregonStrosFan · « **Reply #15 on:** October 17, 2012, 01:34:25 pm »

Quote from: NeilT on October 17, 2012, 01:14:45 pm

Actually, that's a pretty accurate description.

And even in a fake broadcast, Vin Scully is a joy to listen to.

Bench · « **Reply #16 on:** October 17, 2012, 04:27:07 pm »

A degenerate gambler forced to mentor inner city children must resort to Notorious B.I.G. lyrics in order to communicate. The cutest kid is senselessly killed.

MusicMan · « **Reply #17 on:** October 17, 2012, 04:28:43 pm »

A cutthroat lawyer loses his job, tears a young boy away from his beloved hockey team, and relives all of his worst childhood memories.

mrpink · « **Reply #18 on:** October 17, 2012, 04:42:02 pm »

"Aliens" - An unplanned pregnancy leads to complications.
"Rosemary's Baby" - An unplanned pregnancy leads to complications.
"Terminator" - An unplanned pregnancy leads to complications.

That's funny shit right there.

MusicMan · « **Reply #19 on:** October 17, 2012, 05:09:30 pm »

Quote from: mrpink on October 17, 2012, 04:42:02 pm

"Aliens" - An unplanned pregnancy leads to complications.
"Rosemary's Baby" - An unplanned pregnancy leads to complications.
"Terminator" - An unplanned pregnancy leads to complications.

That's funny shit right there.

see also: Prometheus

HudsonHawk · « **Reply #20 on:** October 18, 2012, 08:28:39 am »

Boy finds girl, boy loses girl, girl finds boy, boy forgets girl, boy rembers girl, girl dies in tragic blimp accident over the Orange Bowl on New Year's Day.

MusicMan · « **Reply #21 on:** October 18, 2012, 08:49:47 am »

Quote from: HudsonHawk on October 18, 2012, 08:28:39 am

Boy finds girl, boy loses girl, girl finds boy, boy forgets girl, boy rembers girl, girl dies in tragic blimp accident over the Orange Bowl on New Year's Day.

Goodyear?

Ebby Calvin · « **Reply #22 on:** October 18, 2012, 08:55:52 am »

Devoted fan falls in love, keeps season tickets.

BizidyDizidy · « **Reply #23 on:** October 18, 2012, 09:06:29 am »

http://www.postmodernbarney.com/2009/04/uncomfortable-plot-summaries/

HudsonHawk · « **Reply #24 on:** October 18, 2012, 09:07:28 am »

Quote from: MusicMan on October 18, 2012, 08:49:47 am

Goodyear?

No, the worst.

Limey · « **Reply #25 on:** October 18, 2012, 09:32:55 am »

Quote from: MusicMan on October 17, 2012, 05:09:30 pm

see also: Prometheus

Actually...don't. It's a mess.

Noe · « **Reply #26 on:** October 18, 2012, 11:18:04 am »

Quote from: WakePhil on October 17, 2012, 11:58:37 am

The Natural. He quit because he was shot.

That was my own confusion. I think quiting is more about deciding for yourself to leave. "Involuntarily quits" would have sealed it for me. Either way, it's a minor quibble... good job!

Noe · « **Reply #27 on:** October 18, 2012, 11:19:27 am »

Quote from: Ron Brand on October 17, 2012, 12:51:15 pm

A star pitcher forces his desperate team into making poor decisions. Despite this, the team ends up in the World Series, with Death in the background.

Angels in the outfield

Ron Brand · « **Reply #28 on:** October 18, 2012, 11:47:10 am »

Quote from: Noe in Austin on October 18, 2012, 11:19:27 am

Angels in the outfield

Bang the Drum Slowly.

drew corleone · « **Reply #29 on:** October 18, 2012, 11:54:28 am »

Rebellious son turns to the occult to gain dead father's approval.

NeilT · « **Reply #30 on:** October 18, 2012, 12:04:47 pm »

Farmer digs up cornfield. Doctor fails to perform heimlich maneuver on choking child.

MusicMan · « **Reply #31 on:** October 18, 2012, 12:56:23 pm »

Team promotes mentally unready pitcher from A ball all the way to the majors, ruining dream season.

Noe · « **Reply #32 on:** October 19, 2012, 11:52:50 pm »

Quote from: Ron Brand on October 18, 2012, 11:47:10 am

Bang the Drum Slowly.

Ahhhhh... yes, good one!

LonghornCDR · « **Reply #33 on:** October 29, 2012, 06:50:18 am »

Quote from: NeilT on October 18, 2012, 12:04:47 pm

Farmer digs up cornfield. Doctor fails to perform heimlich maneuver on choking child.

To be fair, the Heimlich maneuver wasn't common medical practice until 1974 and Doc Graham died in 1972 in the movie (1965 IRL).

NeilT · « **Reply #34 on:** October 29, 2012, 07:37:05 am »

Quote from: LonghornCDR on October 29, 2012, 06:50:18 am

To be fair, the Heimlich maneuver wasn't common medical practice until 1974 and Doc Graham died in 1972 in the movie (1965 IRL).

That was always bothersome to me. But of course I wasn't trying to be fair, only dismal.