Advice for Bachelor Party in New Orleans

[Gizzmonic]

Hey guys ('n' ladies),

I have been tapped to be best man at a wedding this fall.  Wedding's in Metairie, which means I'm trying to organize a bachelor party in New Orleans.  Well, my party planning skills amount to jack shit, but I really want to do something memorable for my friend.  So if you know a cool place or innovative method of debauchery, pass it on!  You have my thanks...

[94CougarGrad]

I would honestly stay away from strip clubs on Bourbon St. There were some naaaaasty-lookin', erm, "proprietors" hanging around outside those places.

[HudsonHawk]

Wrap that rascal.

[roadrunner]

Hey guys ('n' ladies),

I have been tapped to be best man at a wedding this fall.  Wedding's in Metairie, which means I'm trying to organize a bachelor party in New Orleans.  Well, my party planning skills amount to jack shit, but I really want to do something memorable for my friend.  So if you know a cool place or innovative method of debauchery, pass it on!  You have my thanks...

Just attened one this summer.  It was incredible.

We did Gold Mine, F&M's, Razzoo, and a handful of other bars around Bourbon and Uptown that I don't remember.  Our hotel was literally right next door to the Penthouse Club, so needless to say we spent a lot of time there.  We did a hungover brunch at Brennan's, too, but I could've done without it.  Ironically enough, the Brennan's in Houston is much more impressive than the one in New Orleans.

Of course, these were all guys age 24-28.  If you're over the age of 30, then I have no idea.  I guess you could do the same things because, after all, it is NOLA.

[headhunter]

Hey guys ('n' ladies),

I have been tapped to be best man at a wedding this fall.  Wedding's in Metairie, which means I'm trying to organize a bachelor party in New Orleans.  Well, my party planning skills amount to jack shit, but I really want to do something memorable for my friend.  So if you know a cool place or innovative method of debauchery, pass it on!  You have my thanks...

http://www.originaldungeon.com/private_parties.shtml
Congrats on the big honor. Remember that your job is to get your buddy to the wedding on time in one piece, with out any new medical conditions or criminal charges. I recommend that you don't indulge yourself during the BP and have your fun at the wedding reception. Plan in advance where the BP will be held and how you will transport the groom from the reception dinner to the BP and back to his room safely. Remember that you have no idea what kind of madness some of the other BP guests might indulge in. It will be easier to negotiate with police, bouncers, concierges etc. if you are not fucked up yourself. Even if you plan a tame evening and that is what your buddy wants--the other guests may have plans of their own.

[MusicMan]

Wrap that rascal.

Twice.

[HudsonHawk]

Of course, these were all guys age 24-28.  If you're over the age of 30, then I have no idea.  I guess you could do the same things because, after all, it is NOLA.

Right, because guys over the age of 30 are way too old to have fun or get an erection.

[Gizzmonic]

Just attened one this summer.  It was incredible.

We did Gold Mine, F&M's, Razzoo, and a handful of other bars around Bourbon and Uptown that I don't remember.  Our hotel was literally right next door to the Penthouse Club, so needless to say we spent a lot of time there.  We did a hungover brunch at Brennan's, too, but I could've done without it.  Ironically enough, the Brennan's in Houston is much more impressive than the one in New Orleans.

Of course, these were all guys age 24-28.  If you're over the age of 30, then I have no idea.  I guess you could do the same things because, after all, it is NOLA.

I'm 31, so I guess that means we should hang out at Luby's and maybe catch a ventriloquist at the Active Senior Center?

[EasTexAstro]

Right, because guys over the age of 30 are way too old to have fun or get an erection.

We have erections that last long enough to call a doctor about....

[MusicMan]

I'm 31, so I guess that means we should hang out at Luby's and maybe catch a ventriloquist at the Active Senior Activity Center?

I'm 36, so I'll have to get special clearance for my walker and be home in time for my nap.

[Gizzmonic]

I'm 36, so I'll have to get special clearance for my walker and be home in time for my nap.

Just make sure to put fresh tennis balls on the legs, we're going to have a long day.

[Andyzipp]

I just turned 40, and all of a sudden I find Rachel Ray and Katie Couric mildly attractive!

[MusicMan]

I just turned 40, and all of a sudden I find Rachel Ray and Katie Couric mildly attractive!

I got you a bottle of Wesson for your birthday.

[hostros7]

I just turned 40, and all of a sudden I find Rachel Ray and Katie Couric mildly attractive!

Hannah Storm.

[Ty in Tampa]

I'll be 49 in a few weeks. Will hospice be available at this shindig?

[roadrunner]

SnS is basically an old folks home.

But seriously, if you're 30+ and still going to the college bars to chase after younger women...I won't judge.  Hell, forget the bars I mentioned - go to the Boot late night for a reealllly good time.

[HudsonHawk]

SnS is basically an old folks home.

But seriously, if you're 30+ and still going to the college bars to chase after younger women...I won't judge.  Hell, forget the bars I mentioned - go to the Boot late night for a reealllly good time.

If you're 30+ and *not* still chasing after younger women, then *I'm* going to judge.

I got news for you kid...your dick still gets hard even after 30.  Shocking, I know.

[HudsonHawk]

I'm 36, so I'll have to get special clearance for my walker and be home in time for my nap.

Matlock is on at 3:30...don't want to miss that.

[EasTexAstro]

Get off my.....yawn....

[MusicMan]

Hannah Storm.

No.

[Jacksonian]

Matlock is on at 3:30...don't want to miss that.

I had the teenage neighbor set the VCR for the Murder She Wrote marathon.

[EasTexAstro]

You know, I am not under 30, but I am pretty sure I am younger than strosrays. Anyone who thinks they know more about a party than SR...

[AstroFrog]

Hey guys ('n' ladies),

I have been tapped to be best man at a wedding this fall.  Wedding's in Metairie, which means I'm trying to organize a bachelor party in New Orleans.  Well, my party planning skills amount to jack shit, but I really want to do something memorable for my friend.  So if you know a cool place or innovative method of debauchery, pass it on!  You have my thanks...

A great bar outside of the French Quarter craziness is Cure (4905 Freret St).  Tremendous mixed drinks - they take a gourmet approach to the craft and the environs are retro firehouse chic.

[HudsonHawk]

You know, I am not under 30, but I am pretty sure I am younger than strosrays. Anyone who thinks they know more about a party than SR...

You know that secret book of secrets, hidden from the world, filled with the wisdom of generations, passed down to only the worthiest of the worthy?  I think strosrays has it.

[Limey]

You know that secret book of secrets, hidden from the world, filled with the wisdom of generations, passed down to only the worthiest of the worthy?  I think strosrays has it.

Have you seen the FedEx commercial where the guy is test-shipping things less valuable than his golf clubs?  It includes his friend's ancient map to the fountain of youth.  His friend is strosrays.

[headhunter]

I'm 31, so I guess that means we should hang out at Luby's and maybe catch a ventriloquist at the Active Senior Center?

figured you were an i-hop man. reminds me not to stereotype.

[Andyzipp]

Hannah Storm.

You know you watch too many hours of ESPN when you start finding Linda Cohn less than hideous.

[Andyzipp]

You know, I am not under 30, but I am pretty sure I am younger than strosrays. Anyone who thinks they know more about a party than SR...

strosrays has forgotten more about partying than most of us will ever know.

[HudsonHawk]

strosrays has forgotten more about partying than most of us will ever know.

Charlie Sheen once called strosrays for suggestions.

[Gizzmonic]

What about a burlesque show? Anyone ever been to one in NO? If so, acceptable for bachelor party or too nerdy?

[headhunter]

What about a burlesque show? Anyone ever been to one in NO? If so, acceptable for bachelor party or too nerdy?

very nerdy, but maybe the groom is very nerdy too. why not just ask him what he wants?
I think a lot of guys don't want a night of debauchery before their wedding, and a burlesque show is a great compromise. 

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

What's your pleasure?

[hostros7]

very nerdy, but maybe the groom is very nerdy too. why not just ask him what he wants?
I think a lot of guys don't want a night of debauchery before their wedding, and a burlesque show is a great compromise. 

Agree w/ asking what he wants.  Generally speaking, when a groom-to-be chooses New Orleans for a bachelor party, I assume that he wants a pleasing combination of booze/tits/gambling, in no particular order.  However, perhaps I just run with a more booze/tits/gambling crowd that could skew my view. 

[Gizzmonic]

very nerdy, but maybe the groom is very nerdy too. why not just ask him what he wants?
I think a lot of guys don't want a night of debauchery before their wedding, and a burlesque show is a great compromise. 

Yeah, I think this might be the way to go.  He's a little more introverted.  I think it was a little awkward at my bachelor party for him at an actual strip club.

[Outlawscotty]

But then again, he picked you to host his......

[jester9450]

Wrap that rascal.

twice dont take chances.

[strosrays]

SnS is basically an old folks home.

But seriously, if you're 30+ and still going to the college bars to chase after younger women...I won't judge.  Hell, forget the bars I mentioned - go to the Boot late night for a reealllly good time.

Hit me in the TZ with some shit about N.O.
Some bullshit about clubbing and boozing and being under age 3-0
Like my crackaz all but dead when we hit the thirty, yo
Like we can't party in the clubs like we did in days of old

You don't want to piss me off, really and truly, oh
My main thug is a cracker named Hudson Hawk, he moody-o
Type of fellow that'll slap you with the toolio
Got your little twenty-something bitch scared to death, act all fruity-o

Fuck that, look at that shorty, she a little cutie-o
Sixteen to sixty want to get all up in that booty, yo
Gotta double up on the Viagra, Cialis 36 Hour, yo
Four hour boner sittin in my bathtub, just like on the TV-o

Hit her with my buggy-whip, make her feel it in her toes
She don't give a shit now if I'm twenty-two or sixty-fo'
Drink all the whiskey in the club, smoke all the cheeba in the baggie, yo
If you don't know, you're fuckin with the 52-year-old all-time life of the party-o

If you really wanna party with me
Put your hands where my eyes can see
Watch what happens when the women see me
Hand it over like it was for free

If you really want to party with me, it must be us
Got Gizzmonic in his Green Hornet mask looking curious
MusicMan with his pocket calculator, appearing murderous
EasTexAstro don't talk much, shorty think he mysterious

Furious, like Andy Zipp, all erudite and serious
Our man from Tampa got it all on tape, in Ty we trust
Fronting punk-ass like you don't wanna be hearing us
If you were smart, now you'd be fearing us

With Jacksonian riding at the front of the bus
Limey talking shit, something about "Thee" and "Thus"
Fuckin Brit start drinking early and outlast the rest of us
Mumble something about 1812 and how the French aren't worth a fuck

If you really wanna party with me
Put your hands where my eyes can see
Watch what happens when the women see me
Hand it over like it was for free


The Link

[headhunter]

If you really wanna party with me
Put your hands where my eyes can see
Watch what happens when the women see me
Hand it over like it was for free[/i]


The Link

really freaking amazing. sincere thanks for taking a favorite song and turning it into the beer and queso anthem.

but I don't judge roadrunner for his assumptions about that sad, tired, unfortunate mass of untrustworthy men over thirty. time will strip those assumptions  away soon enough.

[headhunter]

Agree w/ asking what he wants.  Generally speaking, when a groom-to-be chooses New Orleans for a bachelor party, I assume that he wants a pleasing combination of booze/tits/gambling, in no particular order.  However, perhaps I just run with a more booze/tits/gambling crowd that could skew my view. 

My money says that the groom didn't choose NO for the BP. I assume that the Bride's family lives in Metairie and the gravitational pull of the French Quarter is almost inescapable...
help him, help him pancake spaceman....help him reach escape velocity before its too late!

[Mr. Happy]

Start with a hearty steak dinner at Ruth's Chris downtown. Proceed from there to my favorite dive in New Orleans, located in Midcity-Homedale Inn. Also hit the Bulldog and Rendon Inn Uptown, close it out at F&M Patio Bar, but not before 1:00 a.m. I suggest a designated driver-ME!!!!!

[Ebby Calvin]

Awesomeness

I give up.  Brilliant, sir.

[MRaup]

strosrays just won the internet.

[Mr. Happy]

I'd almost go back for one night with StrosRays. Almost. That's as high a praise as I can give. Simply brilliant from the SnS Renaissance man. The real most interesting man in the world.

[Ty in Tampa]

strosrays just won the internet.

I spent all day yesterday trying to get over the fact I was mentioned.

[94CougarGrad]

strosrays just won the internet.

He didn't invent it?

[hostros7]

He didn't invent it?

He was going to but then he just said "fuck it" and bailed.

[Bench]

I hope this isn't this weekend, otherwise I recommend wrapping everything you have in a pancho.

[Ty in Tampa]

I hope this isn't this weekend, otherwise I recommend wrapping everything you have in a pancho.

That's been covered.

[JackAstro]

...

Zipp needs to resurrect the hall of fame for this. I mean HO LEE SHIT, seriously.

[JimR]

SnS is basically an old folks home.

WTF?

[JackAstro]

WTF??

TURN UP YOUR HEARING AID JIM, HE'S SAYING WE'RE ALL OLD AS SHIT

[MusicMan]

Zipp needs to resurrect the hall of fame for this. I mean HO LEE SHIT, seriously.

Mark already resurrected the POTW.  What more do you want?

[Andyzipp]

Zipp needs to resurrect the hall of fame for this. I mean HO LEE SHIT, seriously.

Oh yeah...I've got time to build a HOF for the last 6 years.

[JimR]

I spent all day yesterday trying to get over the fact I was mentioned.

he obviously does not like the Raups.

[Andyzipp]

he obviously does not like the Raups.

Weren't you in Uzbekistan or somesuch when it was written?  Out of sight...

[MusicMan]

Weren't you in Uzbekistan or somesuch when it was written?  Out of sight...

What happens in Leningrad, stays in St. Petersburg.

[JimR]

Weren't you in Uzbekistan or somesuch when it was written?  Out of sight...

how quick they forget....sigh.

[BudGirl]

how quick they forget....sigh.

you were gone?

[JimR]

you were gone?

i don't think so. did someone say i left?

[BudGirl]

i don't think so. did someone say i left?

I don't know, I don't read half the clowns that post here.

[chuck]

This user is currently ignored.

[MRaup]

I've always wondered which 3 people are ignoring me. It kind of makes me sad that there aren't more. I guess I'm not quite the asshole I like to think I am.

[Ron Brand]

I've always wondered which 3 people are ignoring me. It kind of makes me sad that there aren't more. I guess I'm not quite the asshole I like to think I am.

I'm sorry, did you post something? Oh, wait.

[Ron Brand]

I've always wondered which 3 people are ignoring me. It kind of makes me sad that there aren't more. I guess I'm not quite the asshole I like to think I am.

Hey, I just checked and I pissed someone off! I've got an ignore too!

Woo-hoo!

[MRaup]

I'm sorry, did you post something? Oh, wait.

You hang on my every insult word. I know you're not going anywhere!

[Ron Brand]

You hang on my every insult word. I know you're not going anywhere!

Damn, outed again.

[Ty in Tampa]

Hey, I just checked and I pissed someone off! I've got an ignore too!

Woo-hoo!

That's me, but I just click "Show" when I come across your posts.

[Ron Brand]

That's me, but I just click "Show" when I come across your posts.

Maybe I should try Ignore More, Post Less.

[Bench]

I'd like to think that there's somebody who ignores everyone but him/herself and pretends to be the monarch of this particular corner of the internet.

[EasTexAstro]

I'm not even worth ignoring.

[Ty in Tampa]

I'd like to think that there's somebody who ignores everyone but him/herself and pretends to be the monarch of this particular corner of the internet.

I did notice that HH has 0 ignores.

[JimR]

I did notice that HH has 0 ignores.

he's an Admin. if someone clicks Ignore, he changes it.

[Andyzipp]

he's an Admin. if someone clicks Ignore, he changes it.

Matt argues with the site until it's willing to administer itself.

[EasTexAstro]

Dadgummit. I just noticed I can't ignore myself.

[strosrays]

Dadgummit. I just noticed I can't ignore myself.

Dude . . .

[strosrays]

BTW, how do you get ignored by someone's member?  I've been trying to get my member to ignore a few people, but it seems I cannot.

[Andyzipp]

BTW, how do you get ignored by someone's member?  I've been trying to get my member to ignore a few people, but it seems I cannot.

If you're female, put on about 30 pounds.

[94CougarGrad]

Hey, I just checked and I pissed someone off! I've got an ignore too!

Woo-hoo!

It's like a grand accomplishment, but... not.

I was totally wrong on the identity of one of the people who ignores me. Now I have no clue who I pissed off, but if it were important enough, they'd say something.

My smart phone sometimes loads these forums slowly and that has caused me to accidentally hit the ignore button. One day about a month ago, I hoped chuck wasn't logging in and getting a complex because my dang phone made me ignore him about half a dozen times.

[JackAstro]

It's like a grand accomplishment, but... not.

I was totally wrong on the identity of one of the people who ignores me. Now I have no clue who I pissed off, but if it were important enough, they'd say something.

My smart phone sometimes loads these forums slowly and that has caused me to accidentally hit the ignore button. One day about a month ago, I hoped chuck wasn't logging in and getting a complex because my dang phone made me ignore him about half a dozen times.

Hold on... 3 people ignore you? Someone ignores Ty?!? NO ONE IGNORES ME?!?

What the fuck is going on around here?

[Ron Brand]

Who the hell would ignore Ty and 94CG? Weird.

[MRaup]

I'm enjoying that nobody is surprised I've got 3 admirers.

[chuck]

My smart phone sometimes loads these forums slowly and that has caused me to accidentally hit the ignore button. One day about a month ago, I hoped chuck wasn't logging in and getting a complex because my dang phone made me ignore him about half a dozen times.

I have enough of a complex to where a couple of more people ignoring me is not likely to sway things one way or another but I appreciate the sentiment.

[Ty in Tampa]

Who the hell would ignore Ty and 94CG? Weird.

Ignoring me is pretty much the same as reading my posts.

[Ron Brand]

I'd put myself on 'ignore' but it would probably cause some kind of wormhole.

I know. Next time we're all in the GZ, let's all ignore each other.

[HudsonHawk]

he's an Admin. if someone clicks Ignore, he changes it.

I've never once changed anyone's ignore or altered their post or their status, or anything of the sort.  I'm offended that you would even suggest I'd stoop to such a level.  You may think I'm an asshole, but I'm not dishonest.

[JimR]

I've never once changed anyone's ignore or altered their post or their status, or anything of the sort.  I'm offended that you would even suggest I'd stoop to such a level.  You may think I'm an asshole, but I'm not dishonest.

you also cannot recognize teasing when you read it.

[HudsonHawk]

you also cannot recognize teasing when you read it.

Then my apologies.  It's not always easy to tell.  Lately the "good-natured" ribbing has turned particularly nasty towards me.

[JimR]

Then my apologies.  It's not always easy to tell.  Lately the "good-natured" ribbing has turned particularly nasty towards me.

when did you become so sensitive? must be old age.

[Lurch]

must be old age.

(This was teasing)

[Lurch]

(This was teasing)

(As was this)

[HudsonHawk]

when did you become so sensitive? must be old age.

Under my tough streetwise exterior, lies a heart of gold.

[homer]

Under my tough streetwise exterior, lies a heart of gold.

Very delicate gold.

[homer]

Very delicate gold.

(Also teasing.)

[Ty in Tampa]

(This was teasing)

(As was this)

(Also teasing.)

(((Hudson Hawk)))

[chuck]

Very delicate gold.

More thin leaf than bullion I would say, yes.

You know, I recently had occasion to visit an operational gold mine and was fascinated by the process. It is effectively modern day alchemy. They almost literally turn dirt into gold. It's crazy.

[Lurch]

More thin leaf than bullion I would say, yes.

You know, I recently had occasion to visit an operational gold mine and was fascinated by the process. It is effectively modern day alchemy. They almost literally turn dirt into gold. It's crazy.

Have you seen the story on the planet made of diamond?

[94CougarGrad]

Hold on... 3 people ignore you?

That means I've pissed someone off since the start of baseball season, because I've gone up one. I'm tied with Mark, woo hoo.

[MRaup]

That means I've pissed someone off since the start of baseball season, because I've gone up one. I'm tied with Mark, woo hoo.

This shit is rigged!

[BudGirl]

This shit is rigged!

Are your UT/UCLA tickets still available?  I have a buyer for them if they are.

[subnuclear]

When I read this site on my iPhone, I frequently put people on ignore by accident.

[Lurch]

When I read this site on my iPhone, I frequently put people on ignore by accident.

Yep, me too.

Personally, I find the in-thread ignore message more annoying that any of our regulars could come up with.  I'm betting those of you that have them are ignored by folks that haven't logged in for a long time.

[EasTexAstro]

When I read this site on my iPhone, I frequently put people on ignore by accident.

So....there's an app for that?

[chuck]

Have you seen the story on the planet made of diamond?

Great, next thing you know they're going to discover an asteroid made of gold hurtling through the cosmos, sends the price of gold plummeting. That's all I need.

[JimR]

Are your UT/UCLA tickets still available?  I have a buyer for them if they are.

my tickets, and yes they are. email me. (he just advertised them for me.)

[MRaup]

my tickets, and yes they are. email me. (he just advertised them for me.)

Nuts. There goes my seller's fee.

[T. J.]

What would happen if you put Spack on ignore?

[BudGirl]

Nuts. There goes my seller's fee.

Since I found the buyer, do I get the seller's fee?

[MRaup]

Since I found the buyer, do I get the seller's fee?

you PAY the seller, which is how I get MY fee. Duh.

[Gizzmonic]

I hate to bring this back on topic (especially after strosrays' awesome rap parody [is there anything the man can't do?]) but has anyone been to the Burlesque Ballroom show at the Sonesta?  Apparently it happens every Friday at the Irvin Mayfield Jazz Playhouse, and it's performed by Fleur de Tease.  The hotel is weird about reserving seats (they don't normally do it for this show).  I was just wondering if I need to start pushing them to reserve a seat or if it's gonna be crowded or whatever.  Let me know if anyone knows anything.