Ok, 'fess up...

[JaneDoe]

Which one of you knocked up Padma?
http://wonderwall.msn.com/tv/top-chefs-padma-lakshmi-welcomes-baby-girl-1539454.story?GT1=28135

The "Top Chef" star, 39, has not revealed the baby's father.

[Ron Brand]

We've decided that it is in everyone's best interest to have no comment on the matter.

[MusicMan]

Then I wish you a hearty congratulations on winning the Quickfire challenge.

[Ron Brand]

Talking about it is just going to piss Zooey off anyway.

[Alkie]

We've decided that it is in everyone's best interest to have no comment on the matter.

Good, then keep it to yourselves.   Because that bitch ain't hot.   Even if you're the kind of guy who needs to believe that anyone with dark skin and appears on television is exotic and therefore attractive, this chick is not hot.   I'm not saying she's ugly.  I'm just saying, she's any chick of Indian descent that doesn't weigh more than 140 lbs on Earth.

[Ron Brand]

You call that art? That's not art. My five-year-old can draw better than that.

[Andyzipp]

Based on a combination of alcohol, my imagination and the episode of Top Chef where she was in bed with Nigella Lawson, I've just assumed this is going to be one hot baby.

[MusicMan]

the episode of Top Chef where she was in bed with Nigella Lawson,

1.  Unfortunately, they were separate beds.
2.  Padma ain't bad looking.
3.  Padma can't hold a cnadle to Nigella.

[Andyzipp]

1.  Unfortunately, they were separate beds.
2.  Padma ain't bad looking.
3.  Padma can't hold a cnadle to Nigella.

They were in seperate beds "on camera".  Did you notice that Nigella looked more tossled as the chefs brought food?

I suspect scissoring...

Also, I am completely unaware of how babies are made.

[MusicMan]

Also, I am completely unaware of how babies are made.

Don't look at me.  The stork brought ours.

[Limey]

Good, then keep it to yourselves.   Because that bitch ain't hot.   Even if you're the kind of guy who needs to believe that anyone with dark skin and appears on television is exotic and therefore attractive, this chick is not hot.   I'm not saying she's ugly.  I'm just saying, she's any chick of Indian descent that doesn't weigh more than 140 lbs on Earth.

Padma...not hot...riiiiiight.

[Andyzipp]

Good, then keep it to yourselves.   Because that bitch ain't hot.   Even if you're the kind of guy who needs to believe that anyone with dark skin and appears on television is exotic and therefore attractive, this chick is not hot.   I'm not saying she's ugly.  I'm just saying, she's any chick of Indian descent that doesn't weigh more than 140 lbs on Earth.

But does she know how to work a cock?

[Gizzmonic]

But does she know how to work a cock?

(PA brings out cock from offstage)

Padma: Now, we worked a cock earlier...let's see how it turned out!

[Ebby Calvin]

(PA brings out cock from offstage)

Padma: Now, we worked a cock earlier...let's see how it turned out!

Alfredo sauce?

[rifraft]

Good, then keep it to yourselves.   Because that bitch ain't hot.   Even if you're the kind of guy who needs to believe that anyone with dark skin and appears on television is exotic and therefore attractive, this chick is not hot.   I'm not saying she's ugly.  I'm just saying, she's any chick of Indian descent that doesn't weigh more than 140 lbs on Earth.

I vehemently disagree.  My wife and I saw her eating out in nyc 2 years ago, she is gorgeous in person. 

http://www.nerve.com/CS/blogs/scanner/2009/04/08-15/padma0.jpg

[Rebel Jew]

I vehemently disagree.  My wife and I saw her eating out in nyc 2 years ago, she is gorgeous in person. 

yeah, i saw that movie too

[strosrays]

I vehemently disagree.  My wife and I saw her eating out in nyc 2 years ago, she is gorgeous in person. 

http://www.nerve.com/CS/blogs/scanner/2009/04/08-15/padma0.jpg

Did your wife agree with you on this?  Just curious.

[rifraft]

Did your wife agree with you on this?  Just curious.

She wanted to bring her home with us....

[MusicMan]

She wanted to bring her home with us....

That's a good woman you've got there.

[Rebel Jew]

She wanted to bring her home with us....

yeah, i saw that movie too

[rifraft]

That's a good woman you've got there.

I'm not complaining.

[Alkie]

Padma...not hot...riiiiiight.

Yeah.  Best way to prove to me someone is hot is to show me a picture of her face completely obscured.  I'm sold.

[HudsonHawk]

Yeah.  Best way to prove to me someone is hot is to show me a picture of her face completely obscured.  I'm sold.

What do you think about the top of her head?

[Alkie]

What do you think about the top of her head?

Totally hot.   And the body that's airbrushed to look like every other airbrushed woman in a magazine?  Oooooh.  Now I'm hot.

You people are sheep.

[Ron Brand]

Baaaa...baaa...baaa...

[HudsonHawk]

Baaaa...baaa...baaa...

No shit.  If I'm a sheep, lead me to THAT slaughter.

[Andyzipp]

Totally hot.   And the body that's airbrushed to look like every other airbrushed woman in a magazine?  Oooooh.  Now I'm hot.

You people are sheep.

The actor who plays Alkie on Spikesnstars.com needs a rewrite.

[homer]

Totally hot.   And the body that's airbrushed to look like every other airbrushed woman in a magazine?  Oooooh.  Now I'm hot.

You people are sheep.

Do you have any opinions on Giada?

[BudGirl]

Do you have any opinions on Giada?

Those people have opinions on everyone.

[BizidyDizidy]

Do you have any opinions on Giada?

I personally think she looks like a bobblehead. I am sure she will be glad to receive my feedback.

[HudsonHawk]

I personally think she looks like a bobblehead. I am sure she will be glad to receive my feedback.

Riiiight.  Because this is not SMOKING HOT, especially compared to the chicks you typically bag.

[BizidyDizidy]

Riiiight.  Because this is not SMOKING HOT, especially compared to the chicks you typically bag.

http://www.giadadelaurentiis.org/giada-de-laurentiis-1.jpg

It's like an orange on a toothpick. A virtual planetoid.

[MusicMan]

http://www.giadadelaurentiis.org/giada-de-laurentiis-1.jpg

It's like an orange on a toothpick. A virtual planetoid.

Look, I appreciate a "So I Married an Axe Murderer" reset as much as the next guy... but "Giada is not hot" is not being contrarian, it's just purely and objectively WRONG.

[BizidyDizidy]

Look, I appreciate a "So I Married an Axe Murderer" reset as much as the next guy... but "Giada is not hot" is not being contrarian, it's just purely and objectively WRONG.

I think she's hot - I can love huge headed women too. I wear a 7 3/4 hat, so it's a condition I am familiar with.

[Ron Brand]

Can't we all just get back to Zooey?

[Andyzipp]

I think she's hot - I can love huge headed women too. I wear a 7 3/4 hat, so it's a condition I am familiar with.

It must be hard for you to be as awesome as you are.

[BizidyDizidy]

It must be hard for you to be as awesome as you are.

Nothing more awesome than having a huge dome.

[Bench]

It must be hard for you to be as awesome as you are.

I think the important thing here is that Bizidy just admitted to a bobblehead fetish.

[Limey]

Nothing more awesome than having a huge dome.

True

[MusicMan]

I think the important thing here is that Bizidy just admitted to a bobblehead fetish.

They would seem to demonstrate a certain skill set.

[homer]

Look, I appreciate a "So I Married an Axe Murderer" reset as much as the next guy... but "Giada is not hot" is not being contrarian, it's just purely and objectively WRONG.

purely and objectively WRONG

[Bench]

purely and objectively WRONG

I find it informative that in Alkie's world, there is no way to have 30,000,000 attractive people.

[MusicMan]

purely and objectively WRONG

Alkie having questionable taste in women is not exactly a "man bites dog" story.