Yankees Broadcasters

[Alkie]

Can someone tell me how it's possible here in the broadcasting capital of the fucking universe that the Yankees have one of the 5 worst PBP teams in MLB?

Michael Kay is awful.   

[chuck]

Murcer and McCarver were great together.

[strosrays]

Are Sterling and Suzy relgated to radio?  Seems like every time I turn on the XM, there they are.

[Bench]

Are Sterling and Suzy relgated to radio?  Seems like every time I turn on the XM, there they are.

Yes they are.  Sterling is the worst.

"And it's an A-BOMB... from A-ROD!"

"And the Melk-man delivers!"

And Mark Tex-messages it to deep right field!"

[Alkie]

Yes they are.  Sterling is the worst.

"And it's an A-BOMB... from A-ROD!"

"And the Melk-man delivers!"

And Mark Tex-messages it to deep right field!"

Tell me you just made those up.

[MusicMan]

No.  The "A-BOMB from A-ROD" is now a signature line, and is disgusting.

[Bench]

Tell me you just made those up.

There's no way I could come up with anything that dumb.

[Alkie]

There's no way I could come up with anything that dumb.

Really, I mean those are neither clever nor relevant.   They don't even make fucking sense.   My 6 yr old writes better material.

[Andyzipp]

Really, I mean those are neither clever nor relevant.   They don't even make fucking sense.   My 6 yr old writes better material.

Sit out on your Terrace and listen to 9 innings of John Sterling.  Count the number of times you want to cut yourself.

[Alkie]

Sit out on your Terrace and listen to 9 innings of John Sterling.  Count the number of times you want to cut yourself.

I seriously won't do it.

I tried to watch the Yanksox game last night figuring, hell, I live here now and I'm 7 minutes from the stadium......it lasted less than half an inning before I glazed over.

It isn't just a joke, AL baseball sucks.   This team of batting champs against that team of batting champs.  Yippee.

[Outlawscotty]

I seriously won't do it.

I tried to watch the Yanksox game last night figuring, hell, I live here now and I'm 7 minutes from the stadium......it lasted less than half an inning before I glazed over.

It isn't just a joke, AL baseball sucks.   This team of batting champs against that team of batting champs.  Yippee.

But the alternative is only $8100.....

[Guinness]

But the alternative is only $8100.....

But by saving that $8100 a game over the course of a season, you'd probably have enough money to buy the Pirates.

[austro]

But by saving that $8100 a game over the course of a season, you'd probably have enough money to buy the Pirates.

Why buy them when they'll probably trade all of their players to you for some shiny trinkets?

[Guinness]

Why buy them when they'll probably trade all of their players to you for some shiny trinkets?

Good point, but you'd have to have a place to keep them.  Maybe they can trade PNC for Alkie's terrace?

[Outlawscotty]

I don't think Alkie would go for that; to far to walk to the bathroom.

[Alkie]

Good point, but you'd have to have a place to keep them.  Maybe they can trade PNC for Alkie's terrace?

My view is better.  No thanks.

Oh, and my terrace isn't in Pittsburgh.

[Alkie]

But the alternative is only $8100.....

To be fair, that was the most expensive seats available.

The cheap seats are $180 a piece.  At the top.  In the corner.  Behind the rim.  In the end zone.  Obstructed view.

[Arky Vaughan]

I tried to watch the Yanksox game last night figuring, hell, I live here now and I'm 7 minutes from the stadium......it lasted less than half an inning before I glazed over.

Is there anything you're not 7 minutes from?

[Bench]

Sit out on your Terrace and listen to 9 innings of John Sterling.  Count the number of times you want to cut yourself.

The text of the dumb sayings are only half the battle.  His annoying cadence and mis-emphasis of syllables sends annoying into ludicrous.

[Astroholic]

Is there anything you're not 7 minutes from?

Orgasm?

[Astroholic]

The text of the dumb sayings are only half the battle.  His annoying cadence and mis-emphasis of syllables sends annoying into ludicrous.

JdJO?

[Alkie]

Is there anything you're not 7 minutes from?

I sit on top of the B/C and am three blocks from the 1.  So...no.

I mean really.  I can be at the Garden in 4 minutes.  I can be at Yankee Stadium in 7 or 8 minutes.  I can be in Times Square in 3 minutes.  

Oh, it would take me 31 minutes to get to Shea/Citi.  So fuck that.

ETA: Plus the crosstown bus picks up quite literally in front of my building front door (I can hop from our doorway into the bus) so I can be on the East Side in about 4 minutes).

[Limey]

I sit on top of the B/C and am three blocks from the 1.  So...no.

I mean really.  I can be at the Garden in 4 minutes.  I can be at Yankee Stadium in 7 or 8 minutes.  I can be in Times Square in 3 minutes.  

Oh, it would take me 31 minutes to get to Shea/Citi.  So fuck that.

ETA: Plus the crosstown bus picks up quite literally in front of my building front door (I can hop from our doorway into the bus) so I can be on the East Side in about 4 minutes).

"Yep.  NYC is a pretty small place."
 - The State of Texas

[Alkie]

The whole relativity thing is very interesting, really. 

Just a month ago, in New Braunfels, we would have thought nothing of driving 3 hours just to try a new BBQ joint.   Now, you find out you'd have to go to Brooklyn to get something and you have to pack a fucking lunch.

[Limey]

The whole relativity thing is very interesting, really. 

Just a month ago, in New Braunfels, we would have thought nothing of driving 3 hours just to try a new BBQ joint.   Now, you find out you'd have to go to Brooklyn to get something and you have to pack a fucking lunch.

Back in the old country, a trip to Birmingham (they made me go, honest) was a major logistical exercise involving weeks of planning.  It's 180 miles from London to Birmingham.  Conversely, I have driven to San Antonio, New Braunfels and/or Austin...and back...in a day.  Numerous times.

[Astroholic]

The whole relativity thing is very interesting, really. 

Just a month ago, in New Braunfels, we would have thought nothing of driving 3 hours just to try a new BBQ joint.   Now, you find out you'd have to go to Brooklyn to get something and you have to pack a fucking lunch.

BTW, I will be thinking of you next week as I am floating down the Comal.....Sucker.

[Alkie]

BTW, I will be thinking of you next week as I am floating down the Comal.....Sucker.

You know what you need?   A riverhaus.  Totally fixed up and an acre with 105 feet of private Guad access.   

[Astroholic]

You know what you need?   A riverhaus.  Totally fixed up and an acre with 105 feet of private Guad access.   

And pray tell, how much would that set me back.  Actually I am looking to buy a piece of property in the next few years...but was thinking more along the line of Lake Travis or Canyon Lake.....but Juneberknow.

[Alkie]

And pray tell, how much would that set me back.  Actually I am looking to buy a piece of property in the next few years...but was thinking more along the line of Lake Travis or Canyon Lake.....but Juneberknow.

This is much better.  A river is like a lake, but that cleans itself every few minutes. 

Plus this is at the end of a private dirt road so when I say there's literally no one out there, I mean that.

[Astroholic]

This is much better.  A river is like a lake, but that cleans itself every few minutes. 

Plus this is at the end of a private dirt road so when I say there's literally no one out there, I mean that.

Sounds sweet.  And you left that piece of heaven WHY?

[Alkie]

Sounds sweet.  And you left that piece of heaven WHY?

I will actually tell you the honest truth.

Our last weekend in Texas, we drove up one last time to mow the yard and kiss the neighbors goodbye-until-November.

The only thing I was the least bit teary eyed about leaving in Texas was my weapons-grade smoker and my riverhaus.   April and October in my backyard there, watching the fireflies and golden eagles with the Guad River as a backdrop is Next Level Shit.

Let me put it another way.  I sold everything I owned in Texas to make this move................except my riverhaus.  I know damn well I'll be back in Texas someday, and I'll really wish I had that acre.

[Astroholic]

I will actually tell you the honest truth.

Our last weekend in Texas, we drove up one last time to mow the yard and kiss the neighbors goodbye-until-November.

The only thing I was the least bit teary eyed about leaving in Texas was my weapons-grade smoker and my riverhaus.   April and October in my backyard there, watching the fireflies and golden eagles with the Guad River as a backdrop is Next Level Shit.

Let me put it another way.  I sold everything I owned in Texas to make this move................except my riverhaus.  I know damn well I'll be back in Texas someday, and I'll really wish I had that acre.

So are you renting/leasing that piece out until you return? 

[Alkie]

So are you renting/leasing that piece out until you return? 

Nope.  Two reasons.

1) It's our storage area while we're gone.  It's packed to the windows with all the shit we couldn't move into our postage stamp apt in NY.

2) We want the option of being able to fly back there on a moment's notice should there be a flight sale from NYC to SA some weekend and I didn't want to have to tell someone renting it "sorry, but we need our vacation home back now."

If that changes, I'll let you know.

[Astroholic]

Nope.  Two reasons.

1) It's our storage area while we're gone.  It's packed to the windows with all the shit we couldn't move into our postage stamp apt in NY.

2) We want the option of being able to fly back there on a moment's notice should there be a flight sale from NYC to SA some weekend and I didn't want to have to tell someone renting it "sorry, but we need our vacation home back now."

If that changes, I'll let you know.

Cool.

[Reuben]

Sterling and Waldman are absofuckinglutely horrendous. Micheal Kay is pretty terrible too, with his dumbass "SEE ya!" on every. single. home run.

Oh, and Bench, you forgot, "it's a home run (double, sac fly, any excuse), for Robby Cano, don't you know!"

[Mr. Happy]

But I'm enjoying Al Leiter and David Cone on YES tonight. They're talking a lot.

[Alkie]

Sterling and Waldman are absofuckinglutely horrendous. Micheal Kay is pretty terrible too, with his dumbass "SEE ya!" on every. single. home run.

Oh, and Bench, you forgot, "it's a home run (double, sac fly, any excuse), for Robby Cano, don't you know!"

So why do New Yorkers put up with this shit?

[Outlawscotty]

So why do New Yorkers put up with this shit?

They don't know no better and they don't have a riverhaus.

[Alkie]

They don't know no better and they don't have a riverhaus.

So it's up to me to fight this shit?

[austro]

So it's up to me to fight this shit?

No. Give in and sell us the riverhaus.

[Col. Sphinx Drummond]

No. Give in and sell us the riverhaus.

An SnS timeshare?

[Alkie]

No. Give in and sell us the riverhaus.

Fuck no. 

I stoled the place and I ain't giving up the baddest assed acre in Texas.

[austro]

Fuck no. 

I stoled the place and I ain't giving up the baddest assed acre in Texas.

Well, shit. At least I tried.

[Alkie]

Well, shit. At least I tried.

Not very hard.

I tell you what the deliman said to me last week when I asked him if I could buy some of the pickles that were on the jar on the table...

What do you mean?  EVERYthing is for sale.  How much you got and what do you want?

[Ebby Calvin]

But I'm enjoying Al Leiter and David Cone on YES tonight. They're talking a lot.

When I was living in Oregon several years ago we used to watch Mariners games just because it was Baseball On TV.  I can't remember the broadcast team at the time, but they employed a strategy that (to me) was revolutionary.  When they weren't talking about the game or something very closely related, they shut the fuck up.  I loved it.

I watch baseball because the game is entertaining.  I don't need/want two schlups in blazers trying to entertain me while I'm watching (JD and Brownie excluded, of course).

[Bench]

But I'm enjoying Al Leiter and David Cone on YES tonight. They're talking a lot.

Al Leiter is fantastic on the air.

[Mr. Happy]

I watch baseball because the game is entertaining.  I don't need/want two schlups in blazers trying to entertain me while I'm watching (JD and Brownie excluded, of course).

They were talking baseball, especially pitching, and it was great.

[Ebby Calvin]

They were talking baseball, especially pitching, and it was great.

Good. Then I'll add two more to my safe list. That makes five (including Scully).

[homer]

Yes they are.  Sterling is the worst.

"And it's an A-BOMB... from A-ROD!"

"And the Melk-man delivers!"

And Mark Tex-messages it to deep right field!"

"Nick Swisher is swish-a-licious!"

[Reuben]

"Nick Swisher is swish-a-licious!"

Please tell me you didn't make that up.

[Gizzmonic]

Please tell me you didn't make that up.

Sterling needs to stop stealing his home run schtick from graffiti in the New Yankee Stadium men's room.

"Another A-Bomb from A-Rod!"

[homer]

Please tell me you didn't make that up.

Couldn't make it up.

XM replays various play by play bullshit during the day. When I was in the truck this morning they had about 2-3 minutes of this knucklehead and his Nick Swisher asshattery.

[Bench]

Couldn't make it up.

XM replays various play by play bullshit during the day. When I was in the truck this morning they had about 2-3 minutes of this knucklehead and his Nick Swisher asshattery.

Just wait for the next time the Yankees hit back to back homeruns.

"It's back to back and belly to belly!"

[JackAstro]

Just wait for the next time the Yankees hit back to back homeruns.

"It's back to back and belly to belly!"

AWKwaaaaaaard

[Gizzmonic]

Just wait for the next time the Yankees hit back to back homeruns.

"It's back to back and belly to belly!"

Did I say he gets his calls from restroom graffiti?  I'm sorry, I meant "glory hole grafitti."