Author Topic: Astros sign another reliever off the streets (Read 11641 times)

Noe · « **on:** May 29, 2008, 07:08:09 pm »

Ray King, recently released from a gig in Washington and then in the minor leagues for the WhiteSox, has been signed to a AAA contract and will report to Round Rock. King, he of the enormous girt will try to regain whatever stuff he had five years ago yet again. Good luck with that one Ray-ray.

One thing is for sure, WadeSmith loves him some bullpen arms. If they're out there, he'll offer them a job and see if one of them sticks. So far so good with Byrdak. Also Borkowski cleared waivers and will report to Round Rock. Heck, why not... gets to keep his major league pay scale this way instead of looking for a job somewhere.

Curly · « **Reply #1 on:** May 29, 2008, 08:59:54 pm »

Wasn't King wiht the Cards and the one the Astros lit up (or got key hits/HR) in the playoffs during our run to the WS?

Sleepy · « **Reply #2 on:** May 29, 2008, 09:10:35 pm »

In other news, JimR was signed to a minor league contract on Thursday.

jonbloozy · « **Reply #3 on:** May 29, 2008, 09:23:52 pm »

Quote from: Sleepy on May 29, 2008, 09:10:35 pm

In other news, JimR was signed to a minor league contract on Thursday.

Not sure if JimR will accept the assignment. When asked about the signing, Jim said "WFW"

mihoba · « **Reply #4 on:** May 29, 2008, 09:24:46 pm »

Quote from: Curly on May 29, 2008, 08:59:54 pm

Wasn't King wiht the Cards and the one the Astros lit up (or got key hits/HR) in the playoffs during our run to the WS?

2004 NLCS.

ETA: Berkman went deep off him twice in that series.

JaneDoe · « **Reply #5 on:** May 29, 2008, 09:29:44 pm »

Does RR have any position players or all they all pitchers now?

MRaup · « **Reply #6 on:** May 30, 2008, 12:35:06 am »

Quote from: JaneDoe on May 29, 2008, 09:29:44 pm

Does RR have any position players or all they all pitchers now?

Ray King actually takes up 4 roster spots all by himself.

Short answer to your question: All Pitcher.

Fredia · « **Reply #7 on:** May 30, 2008, 07:13:28 am »

and this helps bulid a complete team for the future big club how?

AtascAstro · « **Reply #8 on:** May 30, 2008, 07:39:28 am »

I guess when the system is as devoid of prospects as ours currently is then you have very little opportunity cost in stocking the AAA club with retreads. The upside being that if you can successfully rehab any of them then you have trading pieces for clubs looking for bull-pen help later on and of course a little insurance for your own club.

ValpoCory · « **Reply #9 on:** May 30, 2008, 07:42:09 am »

Quote from: mihoba on May 29, 2008, 09:24:46 pm

2004 NLCS.

ETA: Berkman went deep off him twice in that series.

Right. And I remember he got hurt right before the 2005 playoffs. At the time I thought that it was good news for the Astros.

2004 season -- 2.61 ERA in 62 IP
2004 playoffs -- 2.35 ERA in 7.2 IP
2005 season -- 3.38 ERA in 40 IP

BudGirl · « **Reply #10 on:** May 30, 2008, 08:16:13 am »

Quote from: Fredia on May 30, 2008, 07:13:28 am

and this helps bulid a complete team for the future big club how?

insurance for injuries, bad performance, etc.

geezerdonk · « **Reply #11 on:** May 30, 2008, 08:33:22 am »

Quote from: MRaup on May 30, 2008, 12:35:06 am

Ray King actually takes up 4 roster spots all by himself.

What's Ray going these days - about three and a half bills?

austro · « **Reply #12 on:** May 30, 2008, 08:45:23 am »

Quote from: geezerdonk on May 30, 2008, 08:33:22 am

What's Ray going these days - about three and a half bills?

The Express may have to release somebody just so they can sew two uniforms together for Ray-ray.

Lurch · « **Reply #13 on:** May 30, 2008, 08:51:13 am »

The Round Rock aerator just shed a tear

AtascAstro · « **Reply #14 on:** May 30, 2008, 09:00:24 am »

Quote from: austro on May 30, 2008, 08:45:23 am

The Express may have to release somebody just so they can sew two uniforms together for Ray-ray.

at least they will have one ready when (if) Sapp makes it to RR

JimR · « **Reply #15 on:** May 30, 2008, 09:10:48 am »

Quote from: Sleepy on May 29, 2008, 09:10:35 pm

In other news, JimR was signed to a minor league contract on Thursday.

not true. i would never accept a minor league deal.

if i was left-handed, i'd still be pitching.

das · « **Reply #16 on:** May 30, 2008, 09:13:11 am »

Quote from: JimR on May 30, 2008, 09:10:48 am

not true. i would never accept a minor league deal.

if i was left-handed, i'd still be pitching.

It's never too late to start. Well, for most of us, anyways...

Lurch · « **Reply #17 on:** May 30, 2008, 10:31:10 am »

Quote from: JimR on May 30, 2008, 09:10:48 am

not true. i would never accept a minor league deal.

if i was left-handed, i'd still be pitching.

Bagwell could teach you to throw left handed. How's your bat speed?

SaltyParker · « **Reply #18 on:** May 30, 2008, 12:07:24 pm »

Quote from: ValpoCory on May 30, 2008, 07:42:09 am

Right. And I remember he got hurt right before the 2005 playoffs. At the time I thought that it was good news for the Astros.

2004 season -- 2.61 ERA in 62 IP
2004 playoffs -- 2.35 ERA in 7.2 IP
2005 season -- 3.38 ERA in 40 IP

Ray King has 2 saves in 17 opportunities over his career. How bout that for a percentage?

littlevisigoth · « **Reply #19 on:** May 30, 2008, 01:53:08 pm »

Quote from: SaltyParker on May 30, 2008, 12:07:24 pm

Ray King has 2 saves in 17 opportunities over his career. How bout that for a percentage?

Scott Linebrink is 4 for 31 in save opportunities for his career. If you're not a closer, your "save opporunities" are all blown saves before the 9th. It says nothing about how good he's been throughout his career as a reliever.

Ty in Tampa · « **Reply #20 on:** May 30, 2008, 02:24:46 pm »

Quote from: littlevisigoth on May 30, 2008, 01:53:08 pm

Scott Linebrink is 4 for 31 in save opportunities for his career. If you're not a closer, your "save opporunities" are all blown saves before the 9th. It says nothing about how good he's been throughout his career as a reliever.

Nor how big he is.

strosrays · « **Reply #21 on:** May 30, 2008, 02:26:26 pm »

Quote from: Ty in Tampa on May 30, 2008, 02:24:46 pm

Nor how big he is.

He's not "big." He's "square."

homer · « **Reply #22 on:** May 30, 2008, 02:30:15 pm »

So, wait a minute. Is Ray King the big fat guy? I can't remember.

Noe · « **Reply #23 on:** May 30, 2008, 02:44:50 pm »

Ray King was asked if he was in *shape*, he said yes. Round is a shape.

homer · « **Reply #24 on:** May 30, 2008, 02:53:35 pm »

When Ray King sits around the house, he *really* sits around the house.

Noe · « **Reply #25 on:** May 30, 2008, 02:56:12 pm »

Good thing Ray King isn't reporting to Corpus Christi. Folks there would want to throw him back into the Ocean. "Free Willy!"

AtascAstro · « **Reply #26 on:** May 30, 2008, 03:11:40 pm »

Apparently there was a problem at the airport on the way to Austin...he was detained under suspicion of smuggling 50 pounds of crack.

Noe · « **Reply #27 on:** May 30, 2008, 03:18:40 pm »

I hear on the nights that King isn't pitching, he will be used to block out the setting sun and provide shade for the first base line Dell Diamond patrons.

ValpoCory · « **Reply #28 on:** May 30, 2008, 03:20:34 pm »

Quote from: Noe in Austin on May 30, 2008, 03:18:40 pm

I hear on the nights that King isn't pitching, he will be used to block out the setting sun and provide shade for the first base line Dell Diamond patrons.

The inconsistent use of the Dell Diamond light post sun shade is annoying. At least they have the pitcher's name on the scoreboard now for the first time in 9 seasons.

homer · « **Reply #29 on:** May 30, 2008, 03:59:16 pm »

Ray King's intro music is the annoying backup beeping sound.

Ty in Tampa · « **Reply #30 on:** May 30, 2008, 04:01:46 pm »

The rest of the Round Rock bullpen is grateful for the extra shade.

Noe · « **Reply #31 on:** May 30, 2008, 04:07:02 pm »

This press release just in from the "All You Can Eat" Chinese buffet on HWY 71 in Round Rock: "WE'RE CLOSED!"

Taras Bulba · « **Reply #32 on:** May 30, 2008, 04:28:39 pm »

Ed Wade: "Ray, you in shape?"

Ray Ray: "I shit bigger than you."

Lurch · « **Reply #33 on:** May 30, 2008, 04:38:11 pm »

Ray once let loose on a wicked slider and a remote control fell out of a fold in his gut.

The jumbotron switched to Video-1.

GreatBagwellsBeard · « **Reply #34 on:** May 30, 2008, 05:24:53 pm »

Ray King is so fat he will one day die of heart disease!

I don't know how to play this game.

Noe · « **Reply #35 on:** May 30, 2008, 06:03:36 pm »

*tsk, tsk, tsk* rookie... step back, let me in here:

Ray King is not allowed to participate in sliding drills any more. People in Hutto were complaining about the after shocks.

VirtualBob · « **Reply #36 on:** May 30, 2008, 06:37:13 pm »

Any word on when (or if) "Burger" King will take his spot(s) on the RR roster?

SaltyParker · « **Reply #37 on:** May 30, 2008, 06:59:32 pm »

Ray King's ass is so big

that he has turn signals on it

MRaup · « **Reply #38 on:** May 30, 2008, 07:00:25 pm »

That farmer that tried to extort money from the Ryans about his post-war fear of fireworks is going to hate when Ray starts hopping around the clubhouse trying to get in to his baseball pants without falling over.

Noe · « **Reply #39 on:** May 30, 2008, 08:37:06 pm »

Family sitting together at the Dell Diamond

(Little Timmy, 6 years old): "Look mommy, they landed the blimp on the pitcher's mound!"
(Mom): "Oh Timmy, it's not polite to point at Mr. King like that".

austro · « **Reply #40 on:** May 30, 2008, 08:55:07 pm »

Gozer: The Choice is made!
Dr. Peter Venkman: Whoa! Ho! Ho! Whoa-oa!
Gozer: The Traveller has come!
Dr. Peter Venkman: Nobody choosed anything!
[turns to Egon]
Dr. Peter Venkman: Did you choose anything?
Dr. Egon Spengler: No.
Dr. Peter Venkman: [to Winston] Did YOU?
Winston Zeddemore: My mind is totally blank.
Dr. Peter Venkman: *I* didn't choose anything...
[long pause, Peter, Egon and Winston all look at Ray]
Dr Ray Stantz: I couldn't help it. It just popped in there.
Dr. Peter Venkman: [angrily] What? *What* "just popped in there?"
Dr Ray Stantz: I... I... I tried to think...
Dr. Egon Spengler: LOOK!
[they all look over one side of the roof]
Dr Ray Stantz: No! It CAN'T be!
Dr. Peter Venkman: What is it?
Dr Ray Stantz: It CAN'T be!
Dr. Peter Venkman: What did you DO, Ray?
Winston Zeddemore: Oh, shit!
[they all see a giant cubic white head topped with a sailor hat, Peter looks at Ray]
Dr Ray Stantz: [somberly] It's ~~the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man~~ Ray King.

Noe · « **Reply #41 on:** May 30, 2008, 09:02:55 pm »

Reid Ryan was on the radio tonight, said they think they can velcro pegs on Ray King and rent him out as a rock climbing mountain on off days.

Lurch · « **Reply #42 on:** May 30, 2008, 09:51:05 pm »

Thanks to Ray King's influence on the tide, Dell Diamond now has the first wave pool in central Texas

VirtualBob · « **Reply #43 on:** May 30, 2008, 10:03:55 pm »

The happiest guy on the team right now is Paronto. He may never look slim, but next to King he'll look almost like he is in shape.

mihoba · « **Reply #44 on:** May 30, 2008, 10:39:52 pm »

Ray King once fell into the Grand Canyon and got stuck.

jonbloozy · « **Reply #45 on:** May 31, 2008, 01:14:25 am »

I've got some great advice for you jokesters.

I had a relative who was fat once. They died. You should be careful what you say about fat people or you might die, too.

VirtualBob · « **Reply #46 on:** May 31, 2008, 01:26:07 am »

Quote from: jonbloozy on May 31, 2008, 01:14:25 am

I've got some great advice for you jokesters.

I had a relative who was fat once. They died. You should be careful what you say about fat people or you might die, too.

First, your reasoning doesn't follow. If you had a fat relative and you had died after laughing at him, then your warning would make sense.

Second, we're all going to die. May as well enjoy life in the meantime.

Lurch · « **Reply #47 on:** May 31, 2008, 09:23:55 am »

VB's meter shuts down at midnight

strosrays · « **Reply #48 on:** May 31, 2008, 11:05:22 am »

Batters have trouble picking up Ray king's pitches as they move out of the shadow of Ray King and into the sunlight.

strosrays · « **Reply #49 on:** May 31, 2008, 11:07:18 am »

Evan Dando is a huge Round Rock fan. He says, "It's a shame about Ray."

strosrays · « **Reply #50 on:** May 31, 2008, 11:09:04 am »

The Mayan calendar predicts an asteroid will hit Ray King in 2012 and cause the end of the world, if not Ray king.

The Third Man · « **Reply #51 on:** May 31, 2008, 06:26:27 pm »

Quote from: strosrays on May 31, 2008, 11:07:18 am

Evan Dando is a huge Round Rock fan. He says, "It's a shame about Ray."

High five!

We're all laughing now, but Ray's been through some hard times. Just the other day he wore his throwback Malcolm X jersey and a helicopter landed on him.

TheRedSon · « **Reply #52 on:** June 01, 2008, 12:16:18 pm »

http://cache.daylife.com/imageserve/03EvckP4PgcKr/340x.jpg

He used to play for the Rockies, but the other mountains couldn't stand him.

jonbloozy · « **Reply #53 on:** June 01, 2008, 12:22:48 pm »

Quote from: TheRedSon on June 01, 2008, 12:16:18 pm

http://cache.daylife.com/imageserve/03EvckP4PgcKr/340x.jpg

He used to play for the Rockies, but the other mountains couldn't stand him.

That's Ray King? I thought this was him.

TheRedSon · « **Reply #54 on:** June 01, 2008, 12:47:01 pm »

Quote from: jonbloozy on June 01, 2008, 12:22:48 pm

That's Ray King? I thought this was him.

Wow, pinstripes really do make you look slimmer.

Noe · « **Reply #55 on:** June 01, 2008, 12:50:00 pm »

My understanding is that Dave Clark has been watching video tapes of Ozzie Guillen's gestures to call in Jenks from the bullpen to learn how to wave in King. "Bring in da' fridge!"