Author Topic: Article title I never thought I would see (Read 6742 times)

JaneDoe · « **on:** May 07, 2008, 01:50:31 pm »

on Astros.com:

Berkman's speed becomes Astros' asset

I know prav linked to the article in NYCU, but the title at astros.com is just too funny.

homer · « **Reply #1 on:** May 07, 2008, 02:00:16 pm »

After Pence walkoff, this was the headline on Astros.com:

There he Goes: Pence makes Crew none the richer

sporadic · « **Reply #2 on:** May 07, 2008, 02:02:38 pm »

Speaking of Berkman's speed...

Any opinions on whether the SB's are due to Puma's cat-like quickness or just him taking advantage of pitchers not paying much attention to him?

JaneDoe · « **Reply #3 on:** May 07, 2008, 02:08:21 pm »

Quote from: homer on May 07, 2008, 02:00:16 pm

After Pence walkoff, this was the headline on Astros.com:

There he Goes: Pence makes Crew none the richer

Yeah, I saw that. That was more of a "how can I make a humorous title out of Pence's name" kinda thing.

Who would have ever thought that "Fat Elvis" would be an asset b/c of his speed?

Noe · « **Reply #4 on:** May 07, 2008, 02:11:03 pm »

Quote from: sporadic on May 07, 2008, 02:02:38 pm

Speaking of Berkman's speed...

Any opinions on whether the SB's are due to Puma's cat-like quickness or just him taking advantage of pitchers not paying much attention to him?

Shock and awe, plain and simple.

Taras Bulba · « **Reply #5 on:** May 07, 2008, 02:12:12 pm »

Quote from: sporadic on May 07, 2008, 02:02:38 pm

Speaking of Berkman's speed...

Any opinions on whether the SB's are due to Puma's cat-like quickness or just him taking advantage of pitchers not paying much attention to him?

Little Debbie's snack cakes with a light sprinkle of HGH.

Lurch · « **Reply #6 on:** May 07, 2008, 02:19:37 pm »

Quote from: Noe in Austin on May 07, 2008, 02:11:03 pm

Shock and awe, plain and simple.

And luck. If I recall, he would have been caught with a decent throw on both attempts last night. Speed wasn't so much the factor.

JimR · « **Reply #7 on:** May 07, 2008, 02:21:10 pm »

Quote from: Lurch on May 07, 2008, 02:19:37 pm

And luck. If I recall, he would have been caught with a decent throw on both attempts last night. Speed wasn't so much the factor.

but he wasn't, and the throw to third was better than "decent."

Fredia · « **Reply #8 on:** May 07, 2008, 02:35:45 pm »

berkman is a gifted ball player. who knows how the timing works or how he sees things when he knows to steal. i dont think there are that many players out there in his catagory.. i am loving the puma pounce

Arky Vaughan · « **Reply #9 on:** May 07, 2008, 02:37:56 pm »

Quote from: Fredia on May 07, 2008, 02:35:45 pm

berkman is a gifted ball player. who knows how the timing works or how he sees things when he knows to steal. i dont think there are that many players out there in his catagory.. i am loving the puma pounce

With all due respect to Berkman, I think you're describing Bagwell.

sporadic · « **Reply #10 on:** May 07, 2008, 02:43:53 pm »

Yep, too early to call his instincts Bagwell-esque...but I think speed is a little over-rated when stealing bases. As I recall, Willy T and Adam E were not the most efficient base runners for players of "speed". Too lazy to look this up - I am quite sure I will be corrected if I am completely off base.

MusicMan · « **Reply #11 on:** May 07, 2008, 02:45:30 pm »

Quote from: JimR on May 07, 2008, 02:21:10 pm

but he wasn't, and the throw to third was better than "decent."

Not to mention the tag, which got down so fast I was sure he'd be called out.

Colt 45 · « **Reply #12 on:** May 07, 2008, 03:02:00 pm »

Quote from: sporadic on May 07, 2008, 02:02:38 pm

Speaking of Berkman's speed...

Any opinions on whether the SB's are due to Puma's cat-like quickness or just him taking advantage of pitchers not paying much attention to him?

Simple answer, because Phil Garner is no longer Astros manager !

JimR · « **Reply #13 on:** May 07, 2008, 03:03:33 pm »

Quote from: sporadic on May 07, 2008, 02:43:53 pm

Yep, too early to call his instincts Bagwell-esque...but I think speed is a little over-rated when stealing bases. As I recall, Willy T and Adam E were not the most efficient base runners for players of "speed". Too lazy to look this up - I am quite sure I will be corrected if I am completely off base.

speed is never overrated.

sporadic · « **Reply #14 on:** May 07, 2008, 03:09:22 pm »

Quote from: JimR on May 07, 2008, 03:03:33 pm

speed is never overrated.

Sorry, I guess I should just state that not all fast runners are great base-stealers...speed is a tremendous asset

JimR · « **Reply #15 on:** May 07, 2008, 03:10:52 pm »

Quote from: sporadic on May 07, 2008, 03:09:22 pm

Sorry, I guess I should just state that not all fast runners are great base-stealers...speed is a tremendous asset

agreed

Randy Watson · « **Reply #16 on:** May 07, 2008, 03:25:52 pm »

This thread makes me think of Glenn Barker.

strosrays · « **Reply #17 on:** May 07, 2008, 03:29:03 pm »

Quote from: Randy Watson on May 07, 2008, 03:25:52 pm

This thread makes me think of Glenn Barker.

My advice: Stop.

hostros7 · « **Reply #18 on:** May 07, 2008, 03:33:24 pm »

JD was discussing last night how Berkman is the 4th fastest astro as timed from the box to first base based on the average time of 3 different runs. Not surprisingly Bourn, Kaz, and Pence were the top three. I would describe my reaction as "surprised." Not certain if Hostess was sponsoring the event.

sporadic · « **Reply #19 on:** May 07, 2008, 03:37:10 pm »

Quote from: hostros7 on May 07, 2008, 03:33:24 pm

JD was discussing last night how Berkman is the 4th fastest astros as timed from the box to first base based on the average time of 3 different ones. Not surprisingly Bourn, Kaz, and Pence were the top three. I would describe my reaction as "surprised." Not certain if hostess was sponsoring the event.

Maybe the three fastest on the team had a bet going and Lance thought it was some sort of team function

VirtualBob · « **Reply #20 on:** May 07, 2008, 04:09:49 pm »

Quote from: sporadic on May 07, 2008, 03:37:10 pm

Maybe the three fastest on the team had a bet going and Lance thought it was some sort of team function

It's all about the placement of the Little Debbie Snack Cart. It must have been down the line beyond first base.

S.P. Rodriguez · « **Reply #21 on:** May 07, 2008, 04:21:18 pm »

Quote from: hostros7 on May 07, 2008, 03:33:24 pm

JD was discussing last night how Berkman is the 4th fastest astro as timed from the box to first base based on the average time of 3 different runs. Not surprisingly Bourn, Kaz, and Pence were the top three. I would describe my reaction as "surprised." Not certain if Hostess was sponsoring the event.

Honestly, before the knee injury, I thought Berkman was pretty fast for his size. He's a big guy and, as such, will never be mistaken for graceful (more like lumbering). But once he gets moving, he's got some pretty decent speed.

As much as I enjoy the snack-cake references, the guy is not fat or out of shape in any way. That said, he'll always be Fat Elvis to me. I can humor "Big Puma" but in my heart "Fat Elvis" is the only name that fits.

I'd also like to interject, his focus in the field has definitely improved this year. He won't displace Pujols (and who could, given all the unabashed man-crushes professed by the voters, never mind the numerous reach-arounds) for the GG, but he's holding his own this year. This is the type of 1B I saw him play in college. If that can be attributed to Tejada's leadership, that's great. Berkman seems to be playing a pretty decent Robin to Tejada's Batman, if that's the case.

sporadic · « **Reply #22 on:** May 07, 2008, 04:26:09 pm »

Quote from: S.P. Rodriguez on May 07, 2008, 04:21:18 pm

Honestly, before the knee injury, I thought Berkman was pretty fast for his size. He's a big guy and, as such, will never be mistaken for graceful (more like lumbering). But once he gets moving, he's got some pretty decent speed.

As much as I enjoy the snack-cake references, the guy is not fat or out of shape in any way. That said, he'll always be Fat Elvis to me. I can humor "Big Puma" but in my heart "Fat Elvis" is the only name that fits.

I'd also like to interject, his focus in the field has definitely improved this year. He won't displace Pujols (and who could, given all the unabashed man-crushes professed by the voters, never mind the numerous reach-arounds) for the GG, but he's holding his own this year. This is the type of 1B I saw him play in college. If that can be attributed to Tejada's leadership, that's great. Berkman seems to be playing a pretty decent Robin to Tejada's Batman, if that's the case.

Dude...Tejada may very well have taken control as a team leader, but a sidekick the Puma is not. You will never see him gazing at Tejada longing to toss his salad like Robin so frequently did to Batman

S.P. Rodriguez · « **Reply #23 on:** May 07, 2008, 04:33:53 pm »

Quote from: sporadic on May 07, 2008, 04:26:09 pm

Dude...Tejada may very well have taken control as a team leader, but a sidekick the Puma is not. You will never see him gazing at Tejada longing to toss his salad like Robin so frequently did to Batman

I did NOT call them the Ambiguously Gay Duo. That is wrong on so many levels....

sporadic · « **Reply #24 on:** May 07, 2008, 04:37:41 pm »

Quote from: S.P. Rodriguez on May 07, 2008, 04:33:53 pm

I did NOT call them the Ambiguously Gay Duo. That is wrong on so many levels....

could not be avoided

BatGirl · « **Reply #25 on:** May 07, 2008, 05:25:42 pm »

Quote from: Fredia on May 07, 2008, 02:35:45 pm

berkman is a gifted ball player. who knows how the timing works or how he sees things when he knows to steal. i dont think there are that many players out there in his catagory.. i am loving the puma pounce

with the emergence of "puma's pack" along with the sound effect of the ~~cougar~~ puma that is played at home before his at-bats,
it would seem that 2008 is shaping up to become lance's year.

all kidding aside, and i can't say i disagree with you here, fredia. he is a talented player. if he has figured
out how to stay focused, especially when he's on base, who knows what opportunities he could
create/take advantage of. he seems to be making more of an effort to be smart out there, imo.

by the way, puma's not fat. per se. but, as my girlfriends and i would say, he definitely has "fattie-face".
nttawwt

Emo Oranges · « **Reply #26 on:** May 08, 2008, 10:02:12 am »

Quote from: homer on May 07, 2008, 02:00:16 pm

After Pence walkoff, this was the headline on Astros.com:

There he Goes: Pence makes Crew none the richer

She constantly tries this approach to headlines. I can't tell you how many Backe headlines she has written have made me want to slam my head against a wall.

"Astros Backe in Action"
"Astros Look To Bounce Backe"

There have been many many more...and I expect another one today.

MusicMan · « **Reply #27 on:** May 08, 2008, 10:04:57 am »

Quote from: Emo Oranges on May 08, 2008, 10:02:12 am

I can't tell you how many Backe headlines she has written have made me want to slam my head against a wall.

I'll take her bad headlines over the Lackey Rag's bad writing.

Noe · « **Reply #28 on:** May 08, 2008, 10:54:06 am »

Quote from: Emo Oranges on May 08, 2008, 10:02:12 am

She constantly tries this approach to headlines. I can't tell you how many Backe headlines she has written have made me want to slam my head against a wall.

"Astros Backe in Action"
"Astros Look To Bounce Backe"

There have been many many more...and I expect another one today.

Unlike our recap writers, most beat reporters, for online or paper, do not write their own headlines. That is the job of someone else. Bad idea to go after Footer in this place, to be sure.

JimR · « **Reply #29 on:** May 08, 2008, 10:56:45 am »

Quote from: Noe in Austin on May 08, 2008, 10:54:06 am

Unlike our recap writers, most beat reporters, for online or paper, write their own headlines. That is the job of someone else. Bad idea to go after Footer in this place, to be sure.

do not write...

Reuben · « **Reply #30 on:** May 08, 2008, 11:02:31 am »

Quote from: Noe in Austin on May 08, 2008, 10:54:06 am

Unlike our recap writers, most beat reporters, for online or paper, write their own headlines. That is the job of someone else. Bad idea to go after Footer in this place, to be sure.

or for the frequent references to "Bourne" in the headlines.

matadorph · « **Reply #31 on:** May 08, 2008, 11:19:44 am »

Quote from: Emo Oranges on May 08, 2008, 10:02:12 am

She constantly tries this approach to headlines. I can't tell you how many Backe headlines she has written have made me want to slam my head against a wall.

"Astros Backe in Action"
"Astros Look To Bounce Backe"

There have been many many more...and I expect another one today.

I highly doubt Footer is responsible for writing her headlines. That's most likely the work of a not-very-clever copy editor at MLB.com.

Duman · « **Reply #32 on:** May 08, 2008, 11:30:10 am »

After the marlins beat the braves a few weeks ago on Dan Uggla's homer, headline in Knoxville paper read " Marlins beat Braves with Uggla Stick" I hate to admit, I chuckled at it. I am always a sucker for a good pun.

pravata · « **Reply #33 on:** May 08, 2008, 11:45:17 am »

Quote from: hostros7 on May 07, 2008, 03:33:24 pm

JD was discussing last night how Berkman is the 4th fastest astro as timed from the box to first base based on the average time of 3 different runs. Not surprisingly Bourn, Kaz, and Pence were the top three. I would describe my reaction as "surprised." Not certain if Hostess was sponsoring the event.

(from the article) Berkman said. "When you hit a little infield chopper, you run like you stole something. If I can smell a hit, trust me, I'm going to use everything I have to get down that line."