Barry Bones
Barry Bones came home,
In his jet-black Escalade®
After visiting a clinic across the bay.
He was after more power and stamina
Meanwhile some articles in the Examiner
Had clouded up an otherwise sunny day.
But the juice made him feel stronger,
And his line drives would be longer,
It gave him back the distance he had lacked,
With an MVP and a monkey on his back.
There's a hole in daddy's ass where all the hormones go,
Palmiero lied for nothin' I suppose.
Little pitchers grow big ears,
And get injected in their rears,
Sweet dreams and clear creams and needles between your toes
Mmm....
Barry Bones’ welcome home
Didn't last too long.
He was losing ink to players with far less skills
With Sammy and Big Tweet
Landing missles in the seats
They got the highlights while he was used to fill
But the gold rolled through his veins
Like a thousand railroad trains,
And his forearms grew the size of compact cars,
While his head got bigger than the moon and planet Mars...
There's a hole in daddy's ass where all the hormones go,
Canseco testfied for nothin' I suppose.
Little pitchers grow big ears,
And get injected in their rears,
Sweet dreams and clear creams and needles between your toes
Mmm....
Barry Bones was alone
When he was handed his conviction
Cocky ‘til the end though no one cared
Well, he‘d outplayed all the best
But would be remembered for all the rest
With an asterisk on his HOF plaque up there
Ah, but the game had lost its fun
He couldn’t see what he had done
To ruin things for the fans who called his name
But they’d be over it by tomorrow and go on out to the game.
There's a hole in daddy's ass where all the hormones go,
Caminiti died for nothin' I suppose.
Little pitchers grow big ears,
And get injected in their rears,
Sweet dreams and clear creams and needles between your toes
Mmm....
